hyperbole, by j0rdan s.

^^^soon to be the only critic standing up for dylan's 80's records

only one recod

record

thanks for reading guys :-)

sarge has been to my place exactly once when he's in town and it has never occurred to me to meet anywhere except at a bar

― The burrito of ennui (Alfred, Lord Sotosyn), Friday, August 12, 2016 3:48 PM (Yesterday) Bookmark

this is true but the one bar we usually go to is effectively a restaurant

i don't hate all bars, but i feel like most bars are actively terrible places. when i find a good one i try to stick with it, though half the time i'd rather just invite friends over and hang out on the porch.

― nomar, Friday, August 12, 2016 3:45 PM (Yesterday) Bookmark

this about sums it up

@jordansarge
my frank ocean review. i think it's good and sensible.

i blame peter thiel

heh

thiel & channel orange.xls

this content could reasonably be charged with second degree murder https://t.co/IHMJXB1xm2

— jord (@jordansarge) March 15, 2018

starbucks cold brew should be a banned narcotic

— jord (@jordansarge) March 15, 2018

:)

wtf @ shaggy

where's the lord custos tribute thread

starbucks cold brew makes me feel crazier than cocaine

how about cocktails?

the most disgusting thing i’ve ever smelled on the subway was a freshly opened container of yogurt. this was 5 minutes ago.

— jord (@jordansarge) February 21, 2018

You've lived here for several years, come now

yogurt smells worse than BO to me

~floridians~

"watch a 29-year-old man smell yogurt for the first time in his life (video)"

https://melmagazine.com/the-men-who-eat-like-boys-c72c39da18bf j0rd how adjacent are you to this article

not really at all. i love vegetables. last night i had white beans and kale for dinner. i just have specific aversions.... mostly to things that are soft and/or slimy and sweet (fruits like peaches, strawberries, bananas etc, also lots of desserts, mushrooms aren't sweet but texturally i can't). but idk, i love oysters even tho they're slimy... i was just convincing my roommate last night to eat fish roe. but i like things that are salty (name anything) and i also like things that are watery (celery, apples, tomatoes, watermelon etc) so i get why i really respond positively to the taste of brine. it all mostly sense to me in my head as i've thought a lot about why i'm repulsed by certain things. i always loved citrus bcuz of florida i think. anyway i consider myself as much of an omnivorous eater as mostly anyone.

Your liking celery is the most terrifying thing I've ever learned about you.

wait you think BO smells bad?

this yogurt slander is frankly unbelievable

wait you think BO smells bad?

― the masseduction of lauryn hill (Stevie D(eux)), Thursday, March 15, 2018 7:46 PM (one hour ago) Bookmark

well no :-) but the BO of i.e. a homeless person, yes

what about a homeless man who smells of celery

lol good revive

that makes sense ty j0rd

Re: strawberries and things of that nature, is it the taste or the texture? Like a strawberry/banana smoothie, is that tolerable or even worse? I assume mangoes are out too.

no i mostly like the taste of the fruits. i enjoy a berry smoothie, tho if it’s with banana i just ask for it with some orange juice instead. and blueberries i will eat sometimes because they’re not as fleshy as strawberries. i haven’t yet really tried to make myself eat jams/jellies.

mangoes pile up on the side of the street in miami but yeah i’ve not ever really eaten those.

I don't understand the mango at all, but I've Hass avocados are the bomb -- the only ones I can eat in one serving.

first time i ate an avocado i spat it out, the texture grossed me out so bad

i like them now, but i still have texture hangups, like water chestnuts - they creep me out

water chestnuts otm. also weird springy baby corn. kimchi still gives me trouble sometimes, it has to be really good in order for me to enjoy it.

there is a character in Bleak House loosely based on j0rdan. Lawrence Boythorn, Jarndyce’s boyhood friend, upon arriving late to Jarndyce’s house because someone gave him bad directions (they’re old now): “We have been misdirected, Jarndyce, by a most abandoned ruffian, who told us to take the turning to the right instead of to the left. He is the most intolerable scoundrel on the face of the earth. His father must have been a most consummate villain, ever to have had such a son. I would have that fellow shot without the least remorse!”

ok i would say some of that

lol

have to put sheets on my bed, would pretty much rather kill myself

― J0rdan S., Monday, July 18, 2011 2:05 AM (4 hours ago) Bookmark

― dayo, Monday, July 18, 2011 6:10 AM (seven years ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

Boythorn basically just said this in the part i’m reading

hi guys! j0rdan I am rereading Bleak House after like 10 years and immediately thought of you upon being reintroduced to this character

lmao

have to put sheets on my bed, would pretty much rather kill myself

this will be me in a few hours

i feel this so much

I have never even once in my life successful put on a fitted bottom sheet on the first attempt

i actually enjoy making my bed now

sellout

J0rdan S. Peterson

duvet tu brute

it's annoying for 3 mins but then after you have a perfect new bed!

im trying to learn to love tidying up

not coming naturally

I've never not my bed. Unmade beds look like they have ketchup and food and shit spilled on them.