Classic Christgau Zings

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is that all you do on ILM?

The burrito of ennui (Alfred, Lord Sotosyn), Thursday, 7 July 2016 13:49 (three years ago) link

avant-bigots

Johnny Cage - 4'33" Fatality (King Boy Pato), Thursday, 7 July 2016 13:52 (three years ago) link

is that all you do on ILM?

Is that what he said to you at the EMP? Sounds like a Queens dad, which he was probably evoking/channeling?

Hare in the Gated Snare (James Redd and the Blecchs), Thursday, 7 July 2016 14:49 (three years ago) link

Once you learn to tell them from the Stoned Tempo Pirates, the Stolen Pesto Pinenuts, the Gray-Templed Prelates, Temple of the Dog, Pearl Jam, and Wishbone Ash, you may decide they're a halfway decent hard rock act.

Johnny Cage - 4'33" Fatality (King Boy Pato), Friday, 15 July 2016 09:53 (three years ago) link

The last thing we need is collegiate existentialism nostalgia.

Johnny Cage - 4'33" Fatality (King Boy Pato), Saturday, 16 July 2016 11:10 (three years ago) link

four months pass...

high-texture also-rans process rock and roll readymades through art school sensibilities and infernal machines

Johnny Cage - 4'33" Fatality (King Boy Pato), Sunday, 20 November 2016 02:38 (two years ago) link

Calling Neil Tennant a bored wimp is like accusing Jackson Pollock of making a mess.

Johnny Cage - 4'33" Fatality (King Boy Pato), Sunday, 20 November 2016 09:24 (two years ago) link

one month passes...

They call Australia Oz because it's about as exotic as Kansas upside down.

Johnny Cage - 4'33" Fatality (King Boy Pato), Thursday, 19 January 2017 10:57 (two years ago) link

Only on the oceanbound land mass where acid house was Beatlemania would anyone sit still for such earnest post-rock tripe.

Johnny Cage - 4'33" Fatality (King Boy Pato), Thursday, 19 January 2017 11:14 (two years ago) link

Some Amurricans think a whispered "Je te desire" is por . . . er, erotic--sexy! I've always preferred "I wanna fuck you" myself.

Johnny Cage - 4'33" Fatality (King Boy Pato), Friday, 20 January 2017 09:14 (two years ago) link

one month passes...

Anglophobes and wimpbashers won't hear it

Johnny Cage - 4'33" Fatality (King Boy Pato), Tuesday, 14 March 2017 12:08 (two years ago) link

watch out America--well-mannered four-part harmonizers are coming to fuck your daughters

Johnny Cage - 4'33" Fatality (King Boy Pato), Tuesday, 14 March 2017 12:17 (two years ago) link

I swear these tuneful blandos were hands-down winners of the REO Speedwagon eight-track earmarked for the Least Alternative "Alternative" of 1994 before I ever read their bio. I swear I didn't know the front man studied guitar at Berklee and took his band name band from The Fountainhead.

Johnny Cage - 4'33" Fatality (King Boy Pato), Tuesday, 14 March 2017 12:18 (two years ago) link

almost hooky enough to reconcile me to a world that needs Marxist background music

Johnny Cage - 4'33" Fatality (King Boy Pato), Tuesday, 14 March 2017 12:20 (two years ago) link

But you have to ask yourself just exactly what kind of repository of All That Is Highest in Western Civilization it is that remains so susceptible to the brummagem, the bathetic, the half-assed, and the utterly full of shit.

Johnny Cage - 4'33" Fatality (King Boy Pato), Wednesday, 15 March 2017 07:54 (two years ago) link

Benetton boys adrift on Tony Blair's morass of neoliberal compromise

Johnny Cage - 4'33" Fatality (King Boy Pato), Thursday, 16 March 2017 11:08 (two years ago) link

I was fully prepared to get close to the high-tech textures and artificial energy of mindless electrodisco. In a few cases I did, too: Utah Saints! Utah Saints!

Johnny Cage - 4'33" Fatality (King Boy Pato), Saturday, 18 March 2017 03:35 (two years ago) link

seven years and no response from clemenza ;_;

mookieproof, Saturday, 18 March 2017 03:47 (two years ago) link

three weeks pass...

Wish this "illegitimate son of man" would stop pretending he's a pimp--he tours so much he can't possibly provide the necessary continuity.

Johnny Cage - 4'33" Fatality (King Boy Pato), Tuesday, 11 April 2017 12:59 (two years ago) link

two months pass...

Down from 48 percent to 35 at amiannoying.com, not because they're less annoying but because they're less successful.

Smootown Philly (King Boy Pato), Friday, 23 June 2017 22:18 (two years ago) link

purty music, but I yawn like a lawn when I hear him recite

Smootown Philly (King Boy Pato), Friday, 23 June 2017 22:19 (two years ago) link

Hopeless eccentric spends most of his adult life and a large chunk of his ill-gotten fortune trying to make the perfect album. Succeeds, kind of, on his own totally irrelevant terms. Nobody cares.

Smootown Philly (King Boy Pato), Saturday, 1 July 2017 10:45 (two years ago) link

college radio wouldn't know a good rhythm section if one played live in the studio

Smootown Philly (King Boy Pato), Saturday, 1 July 2017 10:49 (two years ago) link

Lol at those last two.

Guidonian Handsworth Revolution (James Redd and the Blecchs), Saturday, 1 July 2017 14:45 (two years ago) link

Male computer nerds who've mastered a culture of affluence without making sense of their sex lives should listen up.

Smootown Philly (King Boy Pato), Friday, 7 July 2017 12:27 (two years ago) link

Hopeless eccentric spends most of his adult life and a large chunk of his ill-gotten fortune trying to make the perfect album. Succeeds, kind of, on his own totally irrelevant terms. Nobody cares.

^a fair assessment of Mark Hollis's solo album, imho

the baby grew up to be a secessful kid (unregistered), Friday, 7 July 2017 23:19 (two years ago) link

"666[bent downward arrow or else some emoji I'm too uncool to recognize]"

Smootown Philly (King Boy Pato), Saturday, 8 July 2017 03:23 (two years ago) link

two months pass...

Open Your Eyes You Can Fly [Milestone, 1976]
Shut your mouth and maybe they'll let you land. C

the old rugged crocs (unregistered), Monday, 18 September 2017 13:06 (two years ago) link

two weeks pass...

But you need a lot of hooks to get away with being full of shit

Smootown Philly (King Boy Pato), Thursday, 5 October 2017 20:51 (one year ago) link

The message being that only those ready to give up the transient pleasure of a good tune are ready to confront the meaninglessness of their neoliberal-capitalist lives

Smootown Philly (King Boy Pato), Wednesday, 18 October 2017 11:25 (one year ago) link

Patterns of culture have changed, and in a boutique economy, this shit, like all other shit, is probably here to stay.

Smootown Philly (King Boy Pato), Wednesday, 18 October 2017 11:31 (one year ago) link

two months pass...

Still an expert architect of musical spectacles, but... does anybody actually like the guy?

Shitpost in Opposition (King Boy Pato), Tuesday, 9 January 2018 10:22 (one year ago) link

one month passes...

worthy of Eno at his most rhapsodically technopastoral

milquetoast malone (King Boy Pato), Tuesday, 6 March 2018 10:23 (one year ago) link

Sade for androids

milquetoast malone (King Boy Pato), Tuesday, 6 March 2018 10:59 (one year ago) link

one month passes...

But there are times when the Kiss-Lil Jon continuum is just right for clearing the sinuses or getting you to the next rest stop

Cardigan B (King Boy Pato), Saturday, 7 April 2018 09:25 (one year ago) link

nine months pass...

David Bowie accomplished several things I wish he hadn't in the 70s, from briefly reinstating mime as a legitimate art form to permanently convincing Britons that their elitist nation was the chief locus of artistic sophistication in popular music.

riposte malone (King Boy Pato), Saturday, 12 January 2019 12:35 (eight months ago) link

three weeks pass...

Gary Numan--everywhere you turn these days, Gary Numan is sitting with the lights out, staring off into space.

difficult listening hour, Tuesday, 5 February 2019 19:05 (seven months ago) link

four months pass...

I note as well that you are not from the United Kingdom, the spawning ground of the 1975 delusion.

Tokyo Ghetto Stüssy (King Boy Pato), Sunday, 23 June 2019 07:44 (two months ago) link

two months pass...

The textures are nicer now, but whose aren't?

difficult listening hour, Sunday, 15 September 2019 01:04 (one week ago) link


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