HEY JEWS

I am going to a seder (my first), but because the hostess can't do it on the usual night(s), we're doing it on the 18th. Pseudo-seder. But I'm still psyched. Might try to sort of keep kosher-ish just to see what it's like.

Ooooh and I'm in charge of making charoset for the pseudo-seder, so recipes pls!

lol i read that coke thing really wrong.
xposts

Also: how much hebrew vs. english at your seder?

I never understood why anything other than unleavened bread is necessary though? I mean no bread as a symbol/reminder of events passed makes sense, keeping kosher out of respect for the period I can see, but, like not being allowed to eat corn? What's up with that?

um are you unfamiliar with the passover story or what

oh snap

During Passover, Jews refrain from eating chometz: anything that contains barley, wheat, rye, oats, and spelt, and is not cooked within 18 minutes after coming in contact with water. No leavening is allowed. This signifies the fact that the Hebrews had no time to let their bread rise as they made a hurried escape from Egypt.
Jews of different backgrounds do not observe all of the same rules. Ashkenazi Jews, who come from Europe (most Jews in America), also avoid corn, rice, peanuts, and legumes as they are also used to make bread and may have other grains mixed in. These items are known as kitniyot.

I thought it was anything that swells in contact with water? Or something like that. No corn syrup, in any case, which gives us delicious REAL SUGAR COKE.

The Torah instructs a Jew not to eat (or even possess) chometz all seven days of Passover (Exodus 13:3). "Chometz" is defined as any of the five grains (wheat, spelt, barley, oats, and rye) that came into contact with water for more than 18 minutes. This is a serious Torah prohibition, and for that reason we take extra protective measures on Passover to prevent any mistakes.

Which brings us to another category of food called "kitniyot" (sometimes referred to generically as "legumes"). This includes rice, corn, soy beans, string beans, peas, lentils, peanuts, mustard, sesame seeds and poppy seeds. Even though kitniyot cannot technically become chometz, Ashkenazi Jews do not eat them on Passover. Why?

The Smak (Rabbi Moshe of Kouchi, 13th century, France) explains that products of kitniyot appear like chometz products. For example, it can be hard to distinguish between rice flour (kitniyot) and wheat flour (chometz). Therefore, to prevent confusion, all kitniyot was prohibited.

I'm throwing myself in with the Sephardic camp this year.

Take a Hot Dog
and make it Kosher

Oh makes more sense, and yes, I know the story, but I'm wondering why go so much further than just bread, I mean, Matzah is just unleavened bread, still has wheat in it and all, it's not like they didn't have enough time to cook pasta when escaping Egypt.

Keep hearing the spoken intro to "One Step Beyond" when I see this thread title.

Which is to say, eating corn is a long ways away from letting bread rise.

Keep hearing the spoken intro to "One Step Beyond" when I see this thread title.

Don't eat that - EAT THIS

passover is a great holiday.
G R E A T

BUT, the Haggadahs have not arrived in the mail from my grandfather yet and I'm also getting a bit nervous about seating... also, anyone have a good veggie matzoh ball soup recipe? vegetarians certainly won't eat teh brisket.

good god how do vegetarians ever survive during Passover without the grains?

apparently quinoa is ok.

good to qui-know-a

Seven days of quinoa and matzah sounds . . . constipating.

Can we turn this thread also into a list of all of the awesome things about being jewish in general?

1. Chosen people.
2. Latkes

3. Talmud

4. hot sabbath sex

5. Neuroses

6. control of the media/money

good god how do vegetarians ever survive during Passover without the grains?

― quincie, Monday, April 6, 2009 11:58 AM (2 minutes ago) Bookmark Suggest Ban Permalink

This may explain my increased secularism that started around the time I became vegetarian.

6. Noodle kugel

7. Tikkun olam as commandment

7. anything heimische...

8. Lady rabbis (in non-Orthodox movements)

9. All our base

Tikkun olam is my favorite part of Judaism ever. Concept and metaphor equally awesome.

The Golders Green and St. Louis Park eruvs.

10. sense of humor

what's the deal with "rabbi jose" btw

11. Woody Allen movies

vicky cristina barcelona?

12. Tongue (not explicitly Jewish I know)

no thx
http://www.bangitout.com/uploads/32genesimmons.jpg

13. Philip Roth
14. Having an entire holiday dedicated to alcohol (Purim)
15. Klezmer

14. Having an entire holiday dedicated to alcohol (Purim)

^^^this

13. Philip David Lee Roth

fixed

Today there's a blessing you can make on the sun that can only be made like once every 25 years. That's pretty cool.

Yeah, klezmer wildly OTM but I find Roth totally 100% repellent.

according to the brooklyn paper this is only the 3rd time in history that the sun is in the same position during passover that it was when it was first created

^^^^ awesome

going to an orthodox seder as a favor to moms, not looking forward to it (mostly because it goes well past midnight, is an hour and a half away, and i have to work in the morning)

One sucky thing about being Jewish: Often (like this Passover), the two days of Chag run into Shabbat, which means that observant Jews (including my family) will be keeping three days straight of no electricity and such. Almost everyone always secretly cheats around the second day to take showers.

You can take a shower, I thought, you just can't dry off? What if you stood with your arms out until you air dried?

Or put on a big fluffy bathrobe?

Yeah, it's pretty cheap. I think the country also drinks more beer than any other country in Europe. Per a quick google:

The Czech Republic remains the leader in per capita beer drinking for the 29th year. In 2021, the average Czech drank more than 184 liters of beer.

I think that stems in part not just because it's cheap, but also because it's pretty basic. Low-alcohol pilsners and lagers and the like. But for sure refreshing and ubiquitous!

Re: religion, yeah, I think our guide told us that over 90% of young people there (under 30) don't identify with any religion, and the country as a whole might be hovering around 70% athiest. I should note, per my anecdotes, that our guide pointed out how that nonreligious tradition hasn't negated anti-Semitism through the ages, but that it was nonetheless one of many mitigating factors in the treatment and tolerance of Jews over the centuries. Some interesting deets here (including the fact that the Jews in Bohemia had a historically high rate of intermarriage, near 50%):

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Holocaust_in_Bohemia_and_Moravia

think that stems in part not just because it's cheap, but also because it's pretty basic. Low-alcohol pilsners and lagers and the like. But for sure refreshing and ubiquitous!

These are some of the greatest beers on the planet and far superior to the pastry stout monstrosities being whipped up in the states.

Let alone the default lagers people drink here.

would you call the experience of visiting Prague "good"? Not that I've been to Europe yet in my life but I'm pretty sure I would be too disquieted by the knowledge of how many Jews aren't there anymore to have a good time. Not sure why I assume that about Prague more so than Berlin, possibly just racist against Bohemians.

― G. D’Arcy Cheesewright (silby), Thursday, 4 January 2024 23:15 (yesterday) link

I found visiting Berlin oddly therapeutic, even though my German family left way way before the holocaust. We also only did one Jewish-related thing (I don't even remember exactly what it was but some kind of old synagogue that had been turned into a museum). I was way more interested in the East Berlin cold war stuff tbh.

My wife lived in Berlin for part of the 80s, as a preteen, and this was the first time she had been back since the wall fell. We didn't have much time, so spent it all in the east side, which was less familiar/more interesting to her. She and her mom used to cross at Checkpoint Charlie to go shopping in the East.

okay what's this tunnel thing in Brooklyn? I'm not understanding

from my understanding...chabad was crowded, some dudes decided to tear down a wall to connect to other building. Rival chabad dudes argue about filling the holes. Somebody left a dirty mattress somewhere. The internet assumes jews are killing christian babies. whats new.

https://gothamist.com/news/discovery-of-secret-tunnel-beneath-chabad-hq-in-crown-heights-leads-to-brawl-12-arrests

seems like it's a more fundamentalist dingdongs wanting access to holy places by any means necessary (these are the MESSIAH IS COMING sticker people) and the folks people who control and manage the building and lead the chabad not wanting dangerous alterations made to the * checks notes * literal foundation of their holy buildings

"HEY ASIANS - WTF IS UP WITH THESE WEIRD ASIAN THINGS THE OTHER ASIANS ARE DOING...I can't figure it out"

Jewish ILXORs are not animals in a zoo and we don't keep tabs on each other.

smdh

I'm sorry, I didn't intend to come off like that! I came here to see if it was already being discussed, and when it wasn't, I made my query

The Guardian article said something like 'No motive for the tunnel was revealed' so I was just curious if anyone knew anything, that's all

k

I am very honored to be giving the State of World Jewry address February 25th @92ndStreetY. More information and tickets here:https://t.co/UY19QKj96O

— Bari Weiss (@bariweiss) January 9, 2024

A shanda for the goyim

"HEY ASIANS - WTF IS UP WITH THESE WEIRD ASIAN THINGS THE OTHER ASIANS ARE DOING...I can't figure it out"

Jewish ILXORs are not animals in a zoo and we don't keep tabs on each other.

I just want to push back on this. Yes, I am not a Lubavitcher, but being Jewish I am more equipped than the average American to make sense of what's going on at 770 Eastern Parkway, and so I don't mind being asked in this space.

Yes I can understand being defensive in these particularly hot times, but it did seem like an innocent question (that I was interested in too). Thank you for your generosity eephus

Well I do. We can disagree. It's extremely obnoxious to address this topic to a thread called this.

I am also Asian and it's a common microaggression to get questions like "Where are you from? No really, like originally?" that white looking Americans don't get.

I look forward to this thread beung revived since it's usually a place to celebrate Jewishness or share empathy.

It's ok to be curious. But I also want to ask people to think before they try to start these kinds of "discussions."

Felt innocent enough to me. This is a topic to discuss things about “Jews” and this event is a major news. I didn’t see it as somebody expecting only Jews would have some insight. Despite being a secular Jew in queens I don’t have any special insight into Chabad Jews in Brooklyn but I felt comfortable answering from what I read in the news. Wasn’t clear to me that the writer wasn’t Jewish, didn’t think about it.

As I said we can disagree. It was more of a NYC question than anything.

You're going to have a different perspective and context than me and that's fine.

And thank you for saying sorry, Andy the Grasshopper.

I saw you saying we can disagree. I just wanted to do so. Considering this is nation-wide news and involves insane anti-semitic conspiracy theorying, I don't think it's a NYC question.

... worldwide.

The bigots are having a field day with this tunnel story. I am glad you answered the way you did.

https://podcasts.apple.com/ro/podcast/marilynne-robinson-on-biblical-beauty-human-evil-and/id1548604447?i=1000648054080

I thought some of you guys might appreciate this right now (despite the headline, most of it isn't directly about Israel). Very much Christian author argues that the Old Testament is much more full of mercy, forgiveness and grace than it is given credit for, and made kind of a lightbulb go on for me about it that my views of Judaism have sometimes been colored by self-serving Christian spin on Judaism (wherein Christianity sets it self up as the merciful new religion and Jesus as the merciful new version of God in contrast to the more vengeful and primitive old one)

Purim Sameach!!

Thanks for recommending that episode. I think my friend who is an Anglican minister (and whose kids are Jewish) might have sent me that as well.

And yes, Chag Sameach!

Honestly never under-estimate what Christians don't understand about Judaism. Christians think it's mostly Christianity minus believing that Jesus was the Messiah. They don't know that there's no Jewish hell or that it's not evangelical (and in fact discourages conversion) and lots of other things. I can speak for Christians, I feel comfortable with that. :D

So apparently what I'm describing was once (like 1800 years ago) called Marcionism, but at least officially has been mostly rejected by various Christian sects. I swear I have heard that sort of view expressed before though. Not really thinking of the average Christian so much though.

I mean I was always drawn to the stories of mercy in the Torah - the angel sparing Isaac from sacrifice, Abraham pleading for Sodom and Gommorah, the covenant after the flood. It's not like I grew up thinking God in the Torah was not merciful, but I feel like I have heard it described that way in popular culture, literary analysis, and probably theological arguments as well.