Kids say the darndest things

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(Without wanting to prolong the thread digression any further - Poltergeist was actually an "X" in UK on release (and the US-equivalent "R" over there); the "15" category was introduced about a year later, and Poltergeist was reassigned to that. I think Poltergeist was downgraded to PG or PG-13 on appeal in the US. I have a very specific memory of this as 14-y-o me couldn't believe that I wasn't allowed to see the new Spielberg film!)

Michael Jones, Wednesday, 1 April 2009 23:35 (ten years ago) link

I saw Poltergeist at 8 years old, and couldn't do anything---anything---alone for almost a year. If I ever go to therapy, I'm sure Poltergeist will be a chief topic.

My kids, the oldest of whom is 8, is afraid of The Little Mermaid, so we won't make the same mistake my parents did.

Euler, Wednesday, 1 April 2009 23:50 (ten years ago) link

more on topic: today my youngest (age 2) blathered something angrily at lunch that she punctuated with something that sounded like "dammit". My wife said, well, she knows how to use her "dangit". My daughter then blurted, "I didn't say dangit, I said dammit" and emphasized a few more times the "mmm" in "dammit" to make sure we understood her.

Great.

Euler, Wednesday, 1 April 2009 23:52 (ten years ago) link

yeah I think I was 9 or 10 when I saw poltergeist which makes me think it must have been a G or M but my dad also took me to texas chainsaw massacre when i was a year or so younger and that was definitely rated R

I wish I was the royal trux (sunny successor), Thursday, 2 April 2009 02:30 (ten years ago) link

(M in australia meaning anyone can get in but its recommended for 16(?) and over)

I wish I was the royal trux (sunny successor), Thursday, 2 April 2009 02:31 (ten years ago) link

http://www.impawards.com/1982/posters/poltergeist.jpg

^^ With the PG Rating...

•--• --- --- •--• (Pleasant Plains), Thursday, 2 April 2009 03:53 (ten years ago) link

Wouldn't it just be something if we all watched Poltergeist again and realize that it wasn't really that bad?


Because i haven't watched that shit in over 20 years.

•--• --- --- •--• (Pleasant Plains), Thursday, 2 April 2009 03:54 (ten years ago) link

btw that is a std strategy for dealing w/PTSD

i like to fart and i am crazy (gbx), Thursday, 2 April 2009 04:06 (ten years ago) link

just fyi

i like to fart and i am crazy (gbx), Thursday, 2 April 2009 04:06 (ten years ago) link

I was too scared to sit through Ghostbusters and made my mom leave the theater because I couldn't handle it. I've still never seen the whole thing. I should watch it now and get over the FEAR.

ENBB, Thursday, 2 April 2009 04:07 (ten years ago) link

Don't do it, you'll never eat another marshmallow.

WmC, Thursday, 2 April 2009 04:11 (ten years ago) link

Sorry, still with the films but we watched Goonies the other day - and I would have sworn that there was nothing PG-13 (or 12 I think is the UK equivalent - kind of) about it but we're only a few minutes in and Child No.2 says "What did he say? Did he say shit? You're not supposed to say shit are you?"

The 11 year old thought it was the best "kids" film ever - it's even got willy jokes!

commons hack spat (Ned Trifle II), Thursday, 2 April 2009 10:42 (ten years ago) link

Wouldn't it just be something if we all watched Poltergeist again and realize that it wasn't really that bad?

Because i haven't watched that shit in over 20 years.

― •--• --- --- •--• (Pleasant Plains), Wednesday, April 1, 2009 10:54 PM (Yesterday) Bookmark

i dont know.. being scared of the new dunkin donuts ad is probably a good sign im not ready

I wish I was the royal trux (sunny successor), Thursday, 2 April 2009 11:26 (ten years ago) link

I've watched Poltergeist a few times since 1982 and some of it's cheesy now, like the giant face popping out of the closet. But the build-up is still epically scary (the way those storm clouds roll in!); the meat/eroding face thing remains creepy; and the corpses in the swimming pool, yuck.

My daughter has already snuck in a few "dammit"s this morning, it looks like we're headed for trouble here, with the conservative mother-in-law coming to stay with us for a week starting tomorrow.

Euler, Thursday, 2 April 2009 12:50 (ten years ago) link

some of it's cheesy now, like the giant face popping out of the closet.

ok ok stfu please i'm not ready yet, oh god.

•--• --- --- •--• (Pleasant Plains), Thursday, 2 April 2009 14:58 (ten years ago) link

I will show mercy and not embed this image

http://www.thegreenhead.com/imgs/poltergeist-clown-3.jpg

鬼の手 (Edward III), Thursday, 2 April 2009 15:05 (ten years ago) link

oh shit I'd forgotten about the clown

Euler, Thursday, 2 April 2009 15:06 (ten years ago) link

My daughter has already snuck in a few "dammit"s this morning, it looks like we're headed for trouble here, with the conservative mother-in-law coming to stay with us for a week starting tomorrow.

yeah this is a major problem, you don't want to go "don't say that, never say that" cuz that guarantees she will say it whenever she wants to get a rise out of you

鬼の手 (Edward III), Thursday, 2 April 2009 15:09 (ten years ago) link

when my son was 3 or 4 we were in the bathroom, he was washing his hands and I was whizzing. he glanced over and casually remarked "nice big penis, dad."

鬼の手 (Edward III), Thursday, 2 April 2009 15:13 (ten years ago) link

things always look bigger when you're a child

鬼の手 (Edward III), Thursday, 2 April 2009 15:13 (ten years ago) link

yeah we laughed at it yesterday (big mistake) but ignored it this morning and so I'm hoping if we watch our mouths for a while we'll be ok long-term. She's still a mumbler so you have to pay attention to catch the cussing. We're in that hard transition between when you could say anything when the kid is around and figure it won't make a serious impression, to when everything seems to stick.

xpost hell yeah, I've been there too

Euler, Thursday, 2 April 2009 15:14 (ten years ago) link

one year passes...

My wife is about to give birth. Her C-section's scheduled for Monday, but honestly, she could go at any minute. So last night we were all driving home from somewhere and she was moaning about her discomfort and my six-year-old goes:

"I want to bleed beautiful blood! I want to be pregnant in pain!"

kkvgz, Friday, 8 October 2010 12:25 (nine years ago) link

My six-year-old son. : )

kkvgz, Friday, 8 October 2010 12:29 (nine years ago) link

haaaaaa

make it count, son (sunny successor), Friday, 8 October 2010 12:52 (nine years ago) link

good luck btw!

make it count, son (sunny successor), Friday, 8 October 2010 13:11 (nine years ago) link

Thank you. I was doing pretty well until yesterday, but now I am extremely stressed out. I would like to fast-forward a couple of days, seriously.

kkvgz, Friday, 8 October 2010 13:13 (nine years ago) link

what's up, ugly girls?

crude interloper of a once august profession (Shakey Mo Collier), Friday, 8 October 2010 15:26 (nine years ago) link

Zac, myself and 3 yr old Julia went to an apple orchard the other day and picked from trees of several different varieties, so at some point one of us referred to the "Empire apples". as we soon found out, Julia apparently heard "VAMPIRE apples" !! and maybe it makes us bad parents, but so far we're way too amused to correct her.

Kim, Friday, 8 October 2010 15:46 (nine years ago) link

Oh yeah, when they're that young and they make cute little mistakes like that, in most cases it's okay to let it slide for a while.

kkvgz, Friday, 8 October 2010 15:49 (nine years ago) link

Howie (after a small accident the other day): "Mummy take off my trants and pousers!"

Meg (Meg Busset), Friday, 8 October 2010 19:45 (nine years ago) link

Listen, this thread totally slept on "optical course." I'm telling ya.

I've got ten bucks. SURPRISE ME. (Laurel), Friday, 8 October 2010 20:03 (nine years ago) link

i once very cheerfully yelled to my pal "see you later, asshole!" as our parents were taking us home from preschool. my mom was not, uh, thrilled

― i like to fart and i am crazy (gbx), Tuesday, March 17, 2009 9:54 PM (1 year ago) Bookmark

^^^winner

crude interloper of a once august profession (Shakey Mo Collier), Friday, 8 October 2010 20:25 (nine years ago) link

haw I saw this thread bumped and wondered if I'd shared that here before.

the only truffuluther on ilx (gbx), Friday, 8 October 2010 23:50 (nine years ago) link

2 yr old farted last night "hehehe i fahhted, do it again time"

definatelypoopsmcgee (chrisv2010), Monday, 18 October 2010 17:23 (nine years ago) link

lol

kkvgz, Friday, 22 October 2010 00:43 (nine years ago) link

Owen got up from his nap yesterday feeling cranky, so Ben went over to him, sat down, and said "Owen - tell your feelings to me."

schwantz, Friday, 22 October 2010 15:50 (nine years ago) link

A: mummy, are you happy?
Me: well, I'm a bit tired and grumpy
A: but I want you to be happy. Are you happy?
Me: why do you want me to be happy?
A: I want you to be my friend

Poor love, I had to explain to him that my happiness wasn't directly related to how I felt towards him, that I could be unhappy but still loved him and was his friend :0(

Vicky, Friday, 29 October 2010 11:13 (nine years ago) link

2 yr old farted last night "hehehe i fahhted, do it again time"

love the boston accent

progressive cuts (Tracer Hand), Friday, 29 October 2010 16:25 (nine years ago) link

He just prank-called me:

"Dad, there's a man here who ... Mom-Mom wants to speak to you."
"Oh, okay buddy, why don't you put Mom-Mom on the phone?"
"YO MOMMA YO MOMMA YO MOMMA...HA HA HA HA HA! I GOT YOU!"

kkvgz, Tuesday, 2 November 2010 13:37 (nine years ago) link

Owen: "I tried the salsa!"

Ben: "You mean like a flying salsa?"

schwantz, Tuesday, 2 November 2010 20:48 (nine years ago) link

hey he is from worcester, same thing Tracer!

Str8 Drapin It (chrisv2010), Wednesday, 3 November 2010 18:17 (nine years ago) link

My Wife: The 40s are not ancient-history.

My 9-Year Old: Of course they are. The 70s are ancient-history.

Daniel, Esq., Friday, 5 November 2010 01:20 (nine years ago) link

My not-quite-2 yo daughter and my wife are "gorls" and I am a "bee". I always buzz when she says this, which makes my wife frown.

Well, because whatever happened changed him. (Dr. Superman), Sunday, 7 November 2010 23:14 (nine years ago) link

3-year-old Alice [sounding alarmed]: I'm growing out of my body!

Archel, Monday, 8 November 2010 16:06 (nine years ago) link

And on the way home today:
A: can we go to the shop and buy some lollipops?
Me: do you have any money?
A: no.
Me: well, we can't buy lollipops if we haven't got any money.
A: can we first go to the money shop and buy some money, then?

Archel, Monday, 8 November 2010 18:52 (nine years ago) link

Smart Alice!!

I read through this thread for the first time the other day and "Nice big penis, Dad" may be one of the funniest things ever. omg.

master of retardment (ENBB), Wednesday, 10 November 2010 23:13 (nine years ago) link

Our Alice (and our Amber) get amused by the stories of what they said when they were little..

One of the killer ones:

It was Easter, and Alice (about three) was doing a drawing of something which looked fairly random, inside an oval.
My Mum: "Oh, is that an Easter Egg"
Alice: "Yes"
Mum: "That's nice, so is that the Easter Bunny inside"
Alice: "No, it's a crocodile"
Mum: "Oh right." (thinks: OK, crocs do come out of eggs, so..) (points to a jagged line

Mark G, Thursday, 18 November 2010 14:36 (nine years ago) link

oops:

Mum: "Oh right." (thinks: OK, crocs do come out of eggs, so..) (points to a jagged line) "Yes, I can see his teeth there."
Alice (loudly) :"THAT'S HIS BLANKET!!"

My mum has to leave the room to avoid ROTFWLaughing)

Mark G, Thursday, 18 November 2010 14:37 (nine years ago) link

"No Ben. Transformers aren't animals; they're robots. That's why they do lots of stuff and transform."

schwantz, Thursday, 25 November 2010 03:09 (nine years ago) link

Howie (while stroking Archie's hair): "Archie, you are the most beautiful Archie I've EVER seen!"

Meg (Meg Busset), Friday, 26 November 2010 08:47 (nine years ago) link


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