start a victory garden and ration your IRRATIONALLY ANGRY feelings, part 3

I'm almost to the point of thinking the government should issue a stipend to law-abiding citizens for not being flagrant assholes. When appeals to morality and the common good fall on deaf ears, it's time to dole out the green.

"America, good job, let's all go out for ice cream!"

re: Chicago and its terrible drivers, I get so IA when I see ads posted in bus stops encouraging drivers to yield to pedestrians. Way to miss your target demographic.

I dunno, I presume at least a handful of bus drivers have seen those signs and opted not to plow into a sidewalk full of people at full speed.

That actually just happened. http://abc7chicago.com/news/woman-killed-in-michigan-avenue-bus-crash-idd/763762/

Yeah, I'm aware, unfortunately. It's surprising that things like that don't happen more often. I got a nice scar on my arm a month or so back from a bolt on a lamppost sign as I pulled myself out of the way of a potential beheading-by-bus-mirror because the driver was hugging the curb and clearly unconcerned with the parts of the bus that were extending into the sidewalk zone.

I don't know if it's anger so much as bemusement every time I see a sign on the highway that says "Hit a worker, up to $10,000 fine or a year in jail." As if they need to incentivize people not to hit other people with their car. "Careful, you're on the highway, you don't want to run anybody over!"

First time I saw one of these it read like it was like a discount - only a year and $10k vs. like life in prison for murder, what a deal!

Forgot with the wal;king down a tourist season street the one direction I didn't mention directly was behind you. You pause because the person in front of you stops suddenly and get barged into by the idiot behind you.

Listening to all these podcasts with ads for dubious food delivery companies (Nature Box, Blue Apron) has made me realize how much I hate hearing people talk about food--especially when they're reading ad copy: "get these delicious, mouth watering snacks in your mailbox" etc. But also in general every time I hear someone talking about a meal it feels like I'm reading a sex scene where the author uses words like "glistening"

I saw a van with a stuffed toy strapped to the front radiator yesterday. It doesn't make me angry, but it's just why? It's such a crap thing to do. Why? Why ??

xp i get that. some things aren't worth describing if the other party hasn't experienced it themselves.

Scrumptious and nourishing! Yeah, it's often gross.

when you come back to your office desk and someone has dragged your chair away to speak to someone else at their desk.

when you are queuing in a canteen and someone without a tray stands at the edge of where the rail begins obliviously stopping anyone with a tray from putting it down

drop it like it's hot ♫

http://stream1.gifsoup.com/view7/2497910/goodbye-lotso-o.gif

^ yeah. obv i don't believe in sentient stuffed toys, but the whole idea of it is grotty.

it makes me feel a bit sick actually.

Oh, believe, dog. Believe with all your heart!

Was the stuffed toy thing anything to do with roadkill? Was the first thing that I thought on seeing that possibly the clip above in its original context. Rubbishmen at least symbolising roadkill. Possibly some take on nautical figureheads too.

i forgot to add an ia yesterday (heaven forbid) - when you are in the sauna/spa or whatever, and someone getting into the plunge pool or under an ice cold shower is like "UNNNGRRRHHHHH" as loudly as possible. sort of a vocal version of men spreading their knees as wide as possible on the tube.

i mean i know cold water can be a shock after 30 minutes in the steam room but a polite "brrr" or something like a mixture of a dog and a horse is obviously the way to go.

when you come back to your office desk and someone has dragged your chair away to speak to someone else at their desk

or else adjusted the chair height so you sit down violently like a fucking moron who can't use furniture

or used your keyboard and put up those little keyboard chocks so the keys are all at the wrong angle

i mean i know cold water can be a shock after 30 minutes in the steam room but a polite "brrr" or something like a mixture of a dog and a horse is obviously the way to go.

"brrr, dog. amirite?"

or used your keyboard and put up down those little keyboard chocks so the keys are all at the wrong angle

fixed

you put one down so the other goes up innit?
Like chocks down, keyboard up.
Chocks away and the keyboard takes off from a WWI airfield.

huh
I'm spending way too long trying to work out which one people mean

chocks is the name for the little feet that come out of the bottom side of a keyboard.
It's also the name for the little blocks that kept wheels on vehicles from moving while they sat stationary on a display ground.
warfilms often had pilots saying 'chocks away' as part of their take off procedure. Though I may have got the 2 wars confused in that aspect. Think it was WW1 anyway.

oh yeah I got that, just whether I mean up or down! It's like flammable or inflammable
The keyboard should be elevated

So should proper airplanes.

ONly if they're kept subterraneanly or on an under deck surely? Can't think of other times you'd need to stick a proper airplane in an elevator. & what's a proper airplane anyway, one with the correct etiquette?

Right. I was thinking of prop planes.

well a propeller plane is propelled by a propeller which is what one might say kept it elevated, like.

pplanes

every video you click on these days doesn't just STOP AS IT SHOULD when it's over, instead it KEEPS GOING, usually segueing ungracefully into something COMPLETELY UNRELATED and then you have to search thru your tabs and windows to find the video and stop it

Aaggghh fuck you kindle books "27 mins left in book" "87%" ... "read on for a preview of his next book!"
I want to know when i'm near the end goddammit

The break room at work has two soap dispensers next to the sink labeled "dish soap" and "hand soap" and it is the same soap in both dispensers.

^ totally rational

Is that a fixture or somebody thinking ahead and having a spare container at hand?

I don't know. I like to think there was an idyllic time in the past when there really were two different soaps as labeled but then the economy went into the toilet and now you wash your hands and your dishes with generic Dawn.

THink I've just written off my tv.
Fucketyfucketyfuck.
So never going to see the end of season 1 and 2 of Fringe on a large screen tv. & at least I won't be bothered by how badly insurance prices in the Boston area were effected by them trying to suspend place names on things like telephone wires above residential areas. Gosh what a relief.
Is that too Pollyanna even for me?

Cleaned the screen without checking how it needed to be cleaned , then watched a couple of hours of Supernatural where it seemed to be working ok, Went over to watching Fringe and the picture was sticking then going dark.
Fuck, think I no longer have a working tv.

show up to mr veg's second cousin's graduation party, total small family chill outdoor party. we got her a card and a little cheesy inspiration book, no big woop

my sister in law comes up hugs hello and says loudly in front of everyone DIDNT GET THE NO PRESENTS MEMO HUH? *laughter*

i love her to death but she loves being the one to break that kind of stuff to me, like I'm a stupid child & i fuuuuuucking hate it

it was all i could do not to smack her in the face with the gift bag.

>:(

you should have punted the gift bag over the fence and yelled PROBLEM SOLVED

punted the sister in law over the fence

she didn't get the don't be a wagon memo

lol

What kind of crazy person has a no presents rule?

I mean especially if she just graduated college. Good luck finding a non-retail job in the next 5-10 yrs. Take what you can get FFS.

no one needs a dozen copies of 'oh the places you'll go'

that was not the book i got her fyi