start a victory garden and ration your IRRATIONALLY ANGRY feelings, part 3

and i am insecure enough to wonder if they are pulling my leg & they say my whole name (first & last name) like i am some kind of minor lame celebrity it makes me nervous & suspicious & i dont like it

fin

try to use this to get u into restaurants, then yr celebrity will be delicious

TBF re the full name thing Veg, if its on FB maybe theyre just being lazy and tagging you which defaults to full name?

To bring it back to the topic I hate it when people tag people on FB for no or lame reasons (unrelated photos, comments on news posts with nothing but personsname, etc)

When ppl who aren't buying drinks plant themselves in the way of the bar

OTM. Hate standing drinkers when the bar isn't full (OK, I hate them when it is full too, but at least then they have an excuse) in general: blocking the bar, blocking the route to the toilets, standing right behind my chair talking loudly and swinging their drinking elbow an inch away from my head. Sometimes complete strangers even rest the other arm on the back of my chair and that makes me wish a painful death upon everyone. I have personal space issues.

VG I would hate that too, it would make me super paranoid! Does she talk about other friends to you like that or are you her only Facebook wall celebrity?

Currently thinking bad things about the owner of the car whose alarm has been going for the past 20 minutes, which sounds suspiciously like the one which went off for at least half an hour starting at 1:30am.

"i dont like people!"

lol I feel that stronger as I get older VG, I said that aloud to a professional person the other day when she was telling me I would love x person, it killed the conversation dead.

haha

the full name thing on FB is not to tag me, these ppl are not my FB friends! Like, this one kid is the son of an ex coworker, I have met him in person once like TEN years ago, have never had a conversation with him ever but he is bff friends with my friend. And he left a comment after something i said "Oh, [my full name], you always know the right thing to say" and my first thing was like step off kid, you don't fuckin know me!

i just need to not be around ppl

Haha, wait until I tell my co-workers about what VegemiteGrrl's having to deal with now!

Oh these are millenials,VG? They're all about numbers. I asked my 13 yo niece about her Instagram account thinking she would give me her username but instead she proclaimed the exact number of followers she has

when somebody turns one line that then filters to the next available cashier into two separate lines, one for each cashier.

The single superline is hardly ever space efficient though.

When people from the back of the queue go to the front of the newly opened queue. FUCK YOU

I have started doing this in Aldi if I have like 2-4 items (which I usually do, because I go past on foot on my way home from work) because if I don't do it someone from further back in the queue with a week's worth of family shopping goes to the front of the newly opened queue, every time

if someone from ahead of me in the old queue arrived in the new queue directly behind me I'd let them ahead but so far it has only ever been people from right at the back of the queue with heavily laden trolleys

shopping at my local Co-op is far more sedate and less full of weekly shoppers, at least on weekday evenings, so it's safer there to hang back a moment to see who moves, make "after you" gestures and hope you're not taken up on them, etc

nah i dunno - if a new queue opens and nobody notices, have at it - but if somebody barges ahead simultaneously that'd be pretty bad.

one thing which really gets me is people stopping immediately outside or inside doorways. it is the behaviour of the worst kind of moron.

YES. Or even worse at the bottom/top of an escalator. Which happened to me today, some clueless twat checking his phone oblivious while I had to keep stepping backwards up the escalator in order to avoid bumping into him. Still better than last week when a passenger 6 or 7 steps behind me on a downward escalator let go of their suitcase which proceeded to bump down a few meters and crash into the back of my legs.

Loud people on morning public transit. Shut up, this should be a quiet transition to the harshness of work. A final moment of peace ruined.

I will confess to being the guy that stopped at the jump off point for a ski lift once. It was my first time and I was shaky on my skis. Oops.

Ha I am the person who just falls off the ski lift like a fainting goat. Which is why I haven't been skiing since the mid-90s.

I'm sure I've said this elsewhere, but those times when people stop at the tops/bottoms of escalators are the moments when I come closest to putting my hands on a stranger and moving them out of the way (I actually took a tumble on an escalator once because the lady in front of me didn't consider the logistics of moving her granny cart off of the escalator step until she was already at the bottom). That shit is the ridiculous extreme of the increasing lack of attention people pay to those around them.

you can kind of do a gentle "sorry" and edge past someone with a hand on them, sort of.

you have to cup them very hard otherwise they won't take you seriously.

you have to do an ear clap

or simply prod them with a knife

too much mustard on a sandwich

when you keep hitting the wrong letter over and over and over on iphone keyboard

too much mustard on a sandwich

I don't think this is possible unless it's a PB&J + M.

iphone keyboard generally is maddening.

Try wiping the mustard off and then typing the text.

but then the phone will taste bland

i like *some* mustard, not fuckin giant spoonfuls of it

Yes, same with all sandwich/wrap condiments eg pickle and never-not-overused hoisin sauce

Writers who put gobbets of untranslated French in their books with no context to make it clear what the French bits mean

I thought thats what was happening in Game of Thrones for a whole fucking season when the dothraki were jabbering away in their own language, with no subtitles. I was like "come on, a bit is fine but what the shit is going on here!?"... then we realised we had somehow downloaded a rip with missing subs. :/

I watched the most recent Planet of the Apes movie under similar circumstances, puzzled at the endless sign language, felt very dumb

lol trayce

Ha, one of the first DVDs I bought was for Mystery Train, but I couldn't figure out how to turn on the subtitles.

I had seen it before, so when I'd watch it with friends, I'd quietly narrate what I remembered the characters were saying, when it wasn't obvious.

I finally figured out that turning on the French subtitles actually turned on English subtitles.

i sat through half an hour of Play Time not realising that the tv / dvd aspect ratio was screwed up and that the subtitles were off the screen.

The only time I ever tried to watch Sophie's Choice was on AMC or TCM, and it took me a little while to realize that the extensive untranslated scenes in Polish were a case of omitted subtitles rather than a strange stylistic choice.

I (uh, I mean a friend of mine) watched Russ Meyer's Up! on youtube this past weekend and the first 10 minutes or so are in German (guy pretending to be Hitler getting spanked/abused by a dominator). The youtube title has "(ENG)" in it, because I presume a lot of people didn't stick it out, and complained.

Via the obamatrade.com that Hoos linked elsewhere -- people who can't do cartoon word balloons right, and always have the stem sticking all the way into the speaker's mouth.

my friend is on a massive round-the-world trip & posting pics & travel journal updates on a FB group as she goes, which has been super fun to keep up with.

but uuughhh a couple of her friends are tsmug passive aggressive "been there too" commenters. never impressed or happy or encouraging, always leaving some faux-cheery comment that ensures no-one will be under the illusion that she has done or seen something they havent

FUCK OFFFFFFFFFFFFF

haha I've known some people who are that way about illnesses of all things

"oh you got something? yeah, I had that about a week ago."

The one joke I think of but surprisingly have never written or said out loud - on Facebook or even ILX - is when someone posts a pic of them in front of the Leaning Tower of Pisa or at One World Trade Center, I always want to reply back with "So where's that at?"

Because 9 times out of 10, there's no context, just a caption of "Feeling a lot of history here" underneath them looking at the Pyramids.

no that's good, you should work that

I got a buddy who posts "I'm glad you were born" on everybody's FB when it's their birthday. Maybe I could become the "so where's that at?" guy.

another friend of mine is also travelling but she posts endless uncaptioned photos on IG

most of it is forests and lakes and stuff that is beautiful but jfc a location would be nice

I have a friend that does this with band photos - "these guys rocked!" Etc

"26 years since we last saw these guys"

those are people who don't go to many shows apparently

then again everyone knows that These Guys are the best band of the last 30 years

"These guys" in the last example were Bob playing again for the first time in 25 years, I think.