Innocuous things that make you irrationally embarrassed

yesssss

the idea that college sports is our common touchstone that binds us together

holy shit that is not me

hah, the UT fanaticism I see in my neighborhood is mind boggling

we have a neighbor who carved a big tree stump in their front yard into a giant hook 'em horns hand, which is illuminated at night. They have a trailer that they presumably bring with them for tailgating at big games that opens up to reveal a big screen TV. On many weekends we see them with a bunch of friends sitting on lawn chairs in their driveway watching the game on their big screen TV trailer. In December they have an illuminated santa with sleigh, except it is all in orange and the sleigh is pulled by a longhorn.

hook em santa

EMBARRASSING THINGS

• While entertaining a visitor, one hears some servants chatting without any restraint in one of the back rooms. It is embarrassing to know that one's visitor can overhear. But how to stop them?
• A man whom one loves gets drunk and keeps repeating himself.
• To have spoken about someone not knowing that he could overhear. This is embarrassing even if it be a servant or some other completely insignificant person.
• To hear one's servants making merry. This is equally annoying if one is on a journey and staying in cramped quarters or at home and hears the servants in a neighbouring room.
• Parents, convinced that their ugly child is adorable, pet him and repeat the things he has said, imitating his voice.
• An ignoramus who in the presence of some learned person puts on a knowing air and converses about men of old.
• A man recites his own poems (not especially good ones) and tells one about the praise they have received -- most embarrassing.
• Lying awake at night, one says something to one's companion, who simply goes on sleeping.
• An adopted son-in-law who has long since stopped visiting his wife runs into his father-in-law in a public place.

Awesome, mookieproof! <3 :D

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2gm29WZpBJc

adults who call their parents 'mummy/mommy' or 'daddy'

― just1n3, Thursday, June 4, 2015 11:40 PM (4 days ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

This bothers me so so much. It's fucking creepy and wrong.

http://i.imgur.com/W2skMaD.jpg

Couples who baby-talk to each other in public

I'm IE about authors reading from their books. Like, that's not the way they wrote it (most of the time) and that's not the way you're supposed to absorb it (most of the time.)

I once saw Nicholson Baker read from The Fermata, and boy. whew.

Yeah this is mostly OTM for me too with the exception of the two Davids - Sedaris and Berman. Most notably though, I don't think I will ever recover from the first time I heard Bukowski's voice.

http://www.ubu.com/sound/bukowski.html

my christian co-worker's beliefs

not the fact that she believes in god or anything, but eg we were talking about some health thing or other (she is kind of obsessed with carcinogenic or otherwise harmful things in foods &c) and I happened to mention that life expectancy is greater than it used to be, & she was like "no, ppl are actually living shorter lives because if you look at the history of bible times ppl like moses lived for hundreds of years". This has come up before, I just have to change the subject. Obv it makes no difference to me if a grown-up scientist genuinely believes that the human lifespan used to be 900 years, but I can't help it. I cringe.

she's a scientist? wow

Some of these crazy fuckers also believed Moses was 12ft tall and no doubt co-existed with dinosaurs a la flinstones.

omg wins

the people who keep going on about antioxidants and magic berries are one thing, but comparing lifespans to biblical ones is next level

embarrassingly irrational I suppose. listening to someone come out with this stuff fills me with a sort of deep dread, partly the panic of feeling that a windbag positivist might be lurking nearby listening with relish as they power up for battle

Unless it's a trained speaker, I really hate hearing people read aloud. At first I thought it was only in cases where someone else is reading from my own writing (which is totally yeeeeech!) but my friend insisted on reading me some lyrics from a song he liked the other day and I just had to put up with it in cringey silence.

oh god, we have a homeopath at work. I think I mentioned elsewhere that he was giving a talk about it at work during a 'green week' type event. Anyway even though I'm sure I'd argue with him on the internet about it I wouldn't want to bring it up irl as I hardly know him.
But I would just totally tense up when I could hear this 'Mr Rational' type guy at work come up and try to talk reasonably about it, asking 'friendly' questions etc. Just could not stand it.

That "OOOOH RA OOOOH RA" thing that army dudes do.

People who make a habit of writing "meaningful" and "touching" Facebook status updates.

I've always felt i embarrassed about being served by others, like in restaurants and barber's shops.
When I was very little I saw a cartoon or a picture of a man sitting down to dinner and having an enormous napkin tied round his neck by a waiter. Since then I've harboured an irrational fear that this would some day happen to me.
At children's parties, I avoided having my face painted; not because I didn't want face paint on me, but more to do with the idea of servitude on behalf of the painter unto me.
These days I always get my haircut by the same person - a friend who runs his own place - because it feels less like I'm paying a stranger for their time to treat me.
I also hate it when I'm at a restaurant with a group of people and no one thanks the waiting staff when they deliver dishes/cutlery or act like they're not there at all.

http://www.theguardian.com/commentisfree/2015/jun/28/greece-europe-imf-democracy

Did that make the rounds already?

That "OOOOH RA OOOOH RA" thing that army dudes do.

― just1n3, Wednesday, July 1, 2015 3:44 AM Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

omg, Marines are not little army men. SEMPER FI.

(sorry, just had a flashback.)

Haha I couldn't which thing it was, it's always in soldier movies

*remember

i stopped at this farmstand on the way to work and i generally love this little place, it is very quaint rural new england even though it is in boston, it is in this old barn and has great produce, honey, milk, eggs, and cheese and specialty products from small farms in MA but when i walked in this morning they were playing that bon iver song "skinny love" which it just too much for me in general but combined with the cute rustic vibe of this farmstand i just felt so fucking embarrassed like i was in a commercial with ukuleles or something praising the benefits of "eating fresh, eating local" and i starting cringing and had to leave immediately without buying anything

btw here is the song if you have not already been bombarded with it
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ssdgFoHLwnk

bon iver makes any potentially embarrassing situation veer directly into blood-vessel burstingly embarrassing

The field-trip t-shirts my kids wear this summer at daycare say "It's A [Daycare Name] Thing – You Wouldn't Understand."

totally rational imo

marcos I think your mortification was because you suddenly found yourself in the Chobani yogurt cow commercial.

yes it totally had that vibe!!! it was too much

glad i don't know what chobani yogurt cow is

The field-trip t-shirts my kids wear this summer at daycare say "It's A [Daycare Name] Thing – You Wouldn't Understand."

― pplains, Wednesday, July 1, 2015 9:54 AM (10 minutes ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

This is not embarrassing, it's hilarious.

Can you get me one in an adult L please

You could probably wear one of the kids shirts. They definitely bet on oversized rather than too small this year.

Must've looked like a group of Fry Guys walking into the zoo yesterday.

marcos, watch at your own risk of irrational embarassment

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pQpQuGV_gMA

SORRY dog latin, not marcos. I'm IE!!!!

chobani is the root of all quiet seething humiliation

http://www.youtube.com/watch?t=65&v=l6LNBlHpLRs

er:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=l6LNBlHpLRs

wait, in orbit, why are you embarrassed by the guardian article?

what's with the one that says 'it's your mom's birthday'? how would they know that?

I like to think that somewhere there is a list of words you can't have “Rippled” onto a latte, a la words you can't have printed on the back of an nfl jacket

the 'it's your mom's birthday' latte seems to have a facebook logo on it as well, so the machine pulled the information from facebook I guess?

used a curling iron today, felt searing humiliation
(it's fairly rational embarrassment imo but the degree is definitely out of proportion to the act)

Are you sure the searing embarrassment wasn't actual searing?