your terrible ideas

series of YA mystery novels where ralph bakshi and bob seger solve crimes in the late 70s/early 80s entertainment industry

an Amanda Palmer album titled 'Amanda Palmer, Melon Farmer'

A stick that doesn't make any sound when you drum on your desk but still feels stiff and tactile when you're drumming.
TBH, I'm not smart enough to tell if this is a shitty idea or a brilliant one.

no that's a good idea. dunno how it would work though.

miniature nostril tampons for colds/hay fever complete with little strings

Would pay big $$$ for those nostril tampons today, FWIW.

How would you breathe with tampons stuck up your nose?

God, it feels like I've said that phrase a million times.

Through your mouth?

how else would he say it?

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pRva7z8pvwc

Not super outlandish, but I really want to pour milk on a bowlful of some chocolate chip Famous Amos and pretend it's Cookie Crisp.

I don't ask
for much these days
And I don't bitch and whine
if I don't get my way
I only wanna
eat some Famous Amos like it is Cookie Crisp
pour my milk onto a bowlful of chocolate chip
eat some Famous Amos like it is Cookie Crisp
And I'm keeping my secrets mine

Not super outlandish, but I really want to pour milk on a bowlful of some chocolate chip Famous Amos and pretend it's Cookie Crisp.

― Snapper Raffles (Old Lunch), Wednesday, June 17, 2015 1:14 PM (3 hours ago)

did this

too crumby?

it was perfect

not a terrible idea at all then

a really difficult Where's Waldo on the big screen at theaters during the 20 minutes before the previews start, instead of stupid trivia and commercials. if pepsi (or whatever) still wants to advertise than they can work with the where's waldo people to have some people drinking pepsi in the puzzle or something

Laserpointers in the first 30 seconds.

Yeah but there's a whole list of puntastic things to look for!

When they used to do slide projector ads, that was always a good time to play the alphabet game

Idea: medical coma weight loss facility complete with industrial strength bed shakers and electrical muscle stimulators
http://blh.artilenttechnolo.netdna-cdn.com/wp-content/uploads/2014/07/5270.jpg

A special showing of the movie Twilight but it's actually the Paul Newman movie

There's this weird anecdote about Gerald Ford:

http://i.imgur.com/sNLQL9j.png

Can't get out of my mind this alternate version where the dog takes a shit, the steward rushes over, the president says "No, this is my dog," and then proceeds - excuse me here - proceeds to pin the dog down on the carpet, wiping the dog's ass with his rag.

When he finally lets the dog go, the president stands up and says, "sorry about that," and then looks down at the pile of shit still on the carpet. "You'll take care of that though, right?"

Ford's limo gets a flat in Michigan somewhere, and his very elderly driver starts slowly removing the tire jack and the spare from the trunk. "No, Raymond. This is my limo. I will repair the tire."

The president takes the tire iron and just starts swinging the shit out of it, hammering the fucking rims, making sparks off the lug nuts. At one point, it ricochets off the tire and nearly hits the driver. Ford takes off his jacket, rolls up his sleeve, and starts beating the car door, breaking the windows, the driver starts taking steps backward until he knows he's out of the president's line of vision and then takes off running the other way down the dirt road to ....

I don't know where I'm going with this. It's a terrible idea, that's for sure.

A cover version of Kraftwerk's 'We Are The Robots' titled 'Homoerotic' with lyrics like "When I wear my swimming trunks / you can see my bulging junk".

Laser on the center of a car's grille that helps guide you to the centermost spot in a lane.

'Third Life' for your 'Second Life' character.

Viral video of people spitting on babies

last of those made me lol tbh

dead flies = :(
spitting on babies = :)

was gonna say!

A website called doublespeedgifs.com, where people can upload animated gifs and they're changed to run at double their original speed.

http://ezgif.com/speed

http://i.imgur.com/Jfs0xds.gif

A psychological thriller in which an OBGYN is convinced that he or she will be murdered via a tiny baby gun weilded by one of the babies that he or she delivers. Late night nervy office scenes spent checking hazy ultrasound images for the murder weapon. Terrified during every delivery.

http://i.imgur.com/Rj5Z9l6.gifv

http://i.imgur.com/Rj5Z9l6.gif

"You can actually pinpoint the second when his heart rips in half"

hahaha -- right.. THERE.

http://i.imgur.com/8ZuR0GB.gif

http://i.imgur.com/SVCo0B6.gifv

http://i.imgur.com/SVCo0B6.gifv

oculus rift software that is just a skeleton following you around everywhere

a "gary algorithm"

documentary about the decline in popularity of the 80s 2-tone movement called 'The Last Days of Porkpie'

http://cdn.smosh.com/sites/default/files/2015/06/behind-the-gif-cheetos.gif

updated cover of "girl you need a change of mind" as sung by a fedora mra to a tumblr sjw

^a romantic comedy for these times

series of greeting cards which all have the same picture of Moses reading the ten commandments plus a speech bubble with a different one-word neologism, eg "Mansplaining!", "Clickbait!" and so forth

A terrible pop-country song based on dated slang called "You gotta quit that YOLO livin'"

Fan t-shirts commemorating different years from living history. So like, a t-shirt emblazoned with '1990' and a picture of Gazza and Pavarotti on it.

similarly, 2013, 2014, 2015 etc t-shirts using the London 2012 font