DIY wedding music

On a self-made wedding mix (ok, a playlist) how many Prince songs is too many?

Should I include "slow songs"?

Will people dance to "How Deep is Your Love"?

I included one slow song for about every five uptempo songs. This worked out well early in the evening, but it seemed like after an hour or two, people just wanted to dance dance dance. So if you're programming your playlist in order, maybe keep the slow songs to the first half of your playlist?

I think we only had one Prince song, but it was near the end of our playlist and people kept asking "Why aren't you playing any Prince?" and eventually I skipped ahead to the Prince song so people would shut up about it.

haha ok.

That seems smart re: slow songs early in the evening.

if you're programming a list in order here's my never-fail slow-dance one-two punch:

Unchained Medley >>> Wonderful Tonite

Those are basically the only two slow songs you need in the last two or three hours of dancing; play them back to back.

I am DJing a friend's wedding this weekend and have spent much more time on it than I expected. Some of the songs they wanted me to play I had to search out and download, and now they're having me make two back-ups: a second iPod and then all of the songs on audio CDs.

I am a little torn as to whether I want to actually "play DJ" -- i.e., pick and choose on the fly among the 150 or so songs I have in a playlist on my iPod -- or just sequence a mix beforehand. The former would be more fun, I think, but the couple is so particular about what they want played that it's not like I'm going to be suddenly wowing the crowd with something unexpectedly awesome. Plus, my girlfriend wants to dance with me without me having to rush over to the stereo after three minutes to cue up the next song.

Also, I have learned two things from having informally done this in the past: a) you can never have too many Prince songs and b) you need to have "Livin' on a Prayer" or else drunk guys will yell at you.

are you getting paid?

No.

Processional: "Isis" -- violin, guitar, drum instrumental
Recessional: hand yanked bells
Cocktail hour/Dinner: ipod shuffle of 1950s rnr n lee perry tunes
First Dance: "Sea of Love" -- percy vers for the heads
Father Daughter Dance: "I Wonder Why" -- Dion/belmonts
Bouquet Toss: "Edge of 17"
Garter Toss: "Pour Some Sugar On Me"
Last Dance: detroit techno banger with fireworks
--we had our pals tag team Djs with equpiment borrow from all over the country, but then again our pals are all superhuman .... NOTE:
All above worked like gangBUSTERS!!!, (except 50s music alienated no-kids baby boomer contingent to a degree)

then just do the playlist and dance with your GF.

XP

Bouquet Toss: "Edge of 17"

Mikey/Freddie used to play that at Plant bar, once that was the only record he brough, and he played it over and over again.

oops actually reverse that:
Bouquet Toss: "Pour Some Sugar On Me"
Garter Toss: "Edge of 17"
...this union thing gets confusing
(sounds like she's singin who who who)

I've dj'd 3 friends weddings in the last year, each time with a large set of CDs called "the ultimate wedding songs according to Dan" and I will be selling it soon on late night TV via Ronco.

I will say selecting songs on the fly is pretty important, less about wowing and more about adjusting to the crowd. If nobody's dancing then the mix goes into some 80s hip-hop staple or something and everyone's dancing, it'd probably be smart to play a few more songs like that and not just let the mix move onto whatever genre is next.

The most recent wedding I did was for good friends who were serious indie-rockers, so I was nervous. I know I've seen people DJ stuff like that before, but it's not my forte. But I pulled out some alternative dance classics and mixed it up with my usual stuff (disco, new wave, mostly).

Suprising and effective segways:

Violent Femmes-Blister in the Sun followed by Neil Diamond's Cherry Cherry
Outkast's Hey Ya followed by Iggy Pop's Lust for Life
The Humpty Dance followed by Cannonball by the Breeders.

These aren't the kinds of segways I normally would put in a set, but I was trying to please many folk. Generally I think you want to make all these groups happy...the really old people, the parents, the drunk cousins, the close friends etc etc. I found I was able to move between lots of different genres and as always rely on certain key transition songs to help move between disco and rock or whatever else.

Basically I opened with the oldies following the dance with the parents, Build Me Up Buttercup, some Motown or Stevie, then move into a more 70s old-school vibe into disco then using something like Blondie's Heart of Glass or Bowie or Queen Another One Bites the Dust to go into a some 80s and New Wave, staring with disco-y/clubby New Wave like New Order then moving into the Cure Just Like Heaven for a bit of an alternative set and so on...and from 80s stuff Madonna or Prince can take you back to more clubby/old-school stuff. Maybe later when I have my CDs out I'll list the most effective tracks. Anyway this all depends on the kind of wedding and kind of crowd, I think if I was at a wedding that expected or required Living on a Prayer, I wouldn't want to be djing.

And I still don't know what the Cha Cha Slide is.

Violent Femmes-Blister in the Sun followed by Neil Diamond's Cherry Cherry

I'll remember that. Both are on the playlist. (As are "Hey Ya" and "Cannonball" but not "Lust for Life" and "The Humpty Dance.")

And you're absolutely right about adjusting to the crowd.

which is why ipods are good for "mood music" but not so much for serious dancing.

this is the playlist i ended up putting together (on a laptop, with another as backup). we'd told people to suggest songs on the invitation, so some are requests. number 1 was kinda my standing-around-waiting music, number 2 was her entrance music, number 3 was the after-kiss music, the next bunch was supposed to be for cocktails, the bunch after that for dinner, number 53 was the "first dance" and then the rest was for dancing. not everything got played, if i was nearby i would sometimes bump it--i kind of wish i'd been available to actually dj, but then i was too busy having a really good time.

1. Yo La Tengo - Big Day Coming (7:05)
2. Jon Brion - Phone Call (1:03)
3. Superchunk - Throwing Things (3:26)

4. Death Cab for Cutie - A Movie Script Ending (4:19)
5. Edith Frost - Cars and Parties (3:24)
6. The Pogues - Gridlock (3:33)
7. The Black Crowes - Remedy (5:12)
8. Aimee Mann - Save Me (4:35)
9. Beastie Boys - In 3's (2:19)
10. Calexico - Sunken Waltz (2:27)
11. Afghan Whigs - 66 (3:23)
12. Elliott Smith - Thirteen (demo) (2:48)
13. The Postal Service - Such Great Heights (4:25)
14. Thievery Corporation - Lebanese Blonde (4:42)
15. Los Lobos - Saint Behind the Glass (3:17)
16. The Flaming Lips - Do You Realize?? (3:32)
17. Ray Charles - What'd I Say (4:30)
18. The Dismemberment Plan - A Life of Possibilities (4:34)
19. Stars - Look Up (4:18)
20. Luna - Sideshow by the Seashore (3:08)
21. The Notwist - One With the Freaks (4:02)
22. Beth Orton - Stolen Car (35:04)
23. Nico - These Days (3:33)
24. Bloc Party - So Here We Are (3:53)
25. Chavez - Unreal is Here (2:12)
26. Yo La Tengo - My Little Corner of the World (2:25)
27. Ted Leo/Pharmacists - Me and Mia (3:31)
28. Low - California (3:26)
29. Matthew Sweet - I've Been Waiting (3:36)
30. Pretenders - Brass in Pocket (3:03)
31. The Karminsky Experience Inc. - Exploration (5:35)
32. James - Laid (2:38)

33. The Shins - New Slang (3:51)
34. Cannonball Adderley - Work Song (5:07)
35. The Andrews Sisters - I Can Dream, Can't I? (2:37)
36. The Beatles - Here, There and Everywhere (2:25)
37. Combustible Edison - The Millionaire's Holiday (2:15)
38. Milton Nascimento, Lô Borges e Márcio Borges - Clube da Esquina No. 2 (3:38)
39. Bebel Gilberto - Sem Contenção (3:10)
40. Damien Jurado - Never Ending Tide (4:44)
41. Bobby Timmons - Moanin' (5:08)
42. Yo La Tengo - A Worrying Thing (2:54)
43. Dusty Springfield - The Look of Love (4:08)
44. Stan Getz & João Gilberto - Corcovado (Quiet Nights of Quiet Stars) (45 Version) (2:20)
45. John Coltrane - Nancy (With the Laughing Face) (3:10)
46. Cannonball Adderley - Sticks (3:54)
47. B.B. King - Sweet Little Angel (4:09)
48. Yo La Tengo - Pablo and Andrea (4:16)
49. Van Morrison - Tupelo Honey (6:56)
50. Grandaddy - The Warming Sun (5:43)
51. The Allman Brothers Band - Stormy Monday (8:48)
52. Lemon Jelly - The Staunton Lick (5:22)

53. Sarah Vaughan - Polka Dots and Moonbeams (2:36)

54. 1979 Super Steelers (2:32)

55. Prince & the Revolution - Let's Go Crazy (4:39)
56. Stevie Wonder - Signed, Sealed, Delivered I'm Yours (2:48)
57. Sister Sledge - We Are Family (edit) (3:18)
58. Chic - Le Freak (3:35)
59. Michael Jackson - Don't Stop 'Til You Get Enough (4:49)
60. Barry White - You're the First, the Last, My Everything (4:35)
61. The Pogues - Fairytale of New York (4:35)
62. The Smashing Pumpkins - Luna (3:20)
63. The Go-Go's - We Got the Beat (2:33)
64. Duran Duran - Hungry Like the Wolf (3:25)
65. Joan Jett & the Blackhearts - I Love Rock N' Roll (2:55)
66. Naked Eyes - Always Something There to Remind Me (3:36)
67. The Weather Girls - It's Raining Men (3:31)
68. The B-52's - Rock Lobster (4:54)
69. The Commodores - Easy (4:14)
70. Feist - Now at Last (3:15)
71. Beck - Debra (5:37)
72. Dusty Springfield - Son of a Preacher Man (2:29)
73. Rick James - Super Freak (3:25)
74. Greyboy - Got to Be a Love (3:27)
75. Kool & the Gang - Get Down On It (3:33)
76. Neko Case - Pretty Girls (3:25)
77. Tom Waits - Little Trip to Heaven (On the Wings of Your Love) (3:38)
78. Kylie Minogue - Can't Get You Out of My Head (3:50)
79. Beastie Boys - Sabotage (2:58)
80. Archers of Loaf - Web in Front (2:04)
81. Madonna - Beautiful Stranger (4:21)
82. Violent Femmes - Blister in the Sun (2:24)
83. R. Kelly - Ignition (Remix) (3:03)
84. Kelis - Milkshake (3:06)
85. Outkast - Hey Ya! (3:48)
86. Franz Ferdinand - Take Me Out (3:57)
87. Queen & David Bowie - Under Pressure (3:42)
88. Prince - 1999 (edit) (3:37)
89. The Go-Go's - Our Lips Are Sealed (2:45)
90. The Knack - My Sharona (4:56)
91. Soft Cell - Tainted Love (2:41)
92. The Smiths - This Charming Man (2:42)
93. The Clash - Train in Vain (3:13)
94. New Order - Regret (4:08)
95. Blondie - Call Me (3:29)
96. Ohio Players - Love Rollercoaster (4:46)
97. Wyclef Jean - Gone Till November (3:16)
98. Nellie McKay - I Wanna Get Married (4:01)
99. Peggy Lee - Bye Bye Blackbird (3:03)

awesome!!!

number 2 was her entrance music

Aw.

thanks!

82. Violent Femmes - Blister in the Sun (2:24)
83. R. Kelly - Ignition (Remix) (3:03)
84. Kelis - Milkshake (3:06)
85. Outkast - Hey Ya! (3:48)
86. Franz Ferdinand - Take Me Out (3:57)
87. Queen & David Bowie - Under Pressure (3:42)
88. Prince - 1999 (edit) (3:37)

*standing, applauding*

a) you can never have too many Prince songs and b) you need to have "Livin' on a Prayer" or else drunk guys will yell at you.

a) Thank you, this affirms what I was leaning towards (i.e., pretty much all of the greatest hits).
b) Way ahead of you--I'm from New Jersey, and thus, there will be a number of NJ fellas attending who will demand this song.

Our external hard drive crashed pretty soon after the wedding so I lost our playlist. ;_; I made a copy for my sister before it died but I doubt she is willing to go through and type up a list of every single song on the cd.

have her drag it into winamp and export an html file of the playlist

3. Superchunk - Throwing Things (3:26)

number 3 was the after-kiss music

<3^^^^^

Dear Mookie:

I kind of love you.

Love

Mr. Que

awwww.

it was the no pocky version, too, not the acoustic.

I'm thinking of renaming my mp3 of "Wake Me Up Before You Go-Go" something else, like "Don't Stop Til You Get Enough" or "Groove is in the Heart", so whoever is manning the iPod can't foil my plans.

We also included the "Please select two songs for the reception" form in our invitations and with a few executive editorial decisions came up with this playlist - it went over well and accommodated all the parents, relatives, friends, coworkers, and drone rockers in the audience ranging from age 14 to 92.

Aside #1: There was another differently-ordered playlist set aside if there was going to be a big dancing crowd, but as it turned out most people were into socializing, chowing down on food/drink, and maybe dancing on occasion. I had way more music set aside than what was actually used, but all turned out well

Standing-around-waiting music was provided by a fellow band member who played backgroundy ambient stuff on electric guitar where he switched to an instrumental "God Only Knows" for us to walk down the aisle together. After the "ladies and gentlemen, may we present Mr. & Mrs..." the Beach Boys' version kicked in. We didn't do a first dance per se, but the first song on for us was Spiritualized's "Ladies And Gentlemen We Are Floating In Space" (the full "Elvis ending" version)

In the end, the playlist was:

The Beach Boys - "God Only Knows"
Spiritualized - "Ladies And Gentlemen We Are Floating In Space (Elvis Mix)"
Harry Connick Jr. - "It Had To Be You"
Django Reinhardt - "All Of Me"
Frank Sinatra - "I Get A Kick Out Of You"
Etta James - "At Last"
Diana Krall - "I've Got You Under My Skin"
Tom Waits - "Little Trip To Heaven (On The Wings Of Your Love)"
Frank Sinatra - "I Could Write A Book"
K.D. Lang & Tony Bennett - "Dream A Little Dream Of Me"
Billie Holiday - "The Way You Look Tonight"
James Carr - "Young Lovers"
Al Green - "Let's Stay Together"
Count Basie And His Orchestra / Frank Sinatra - "The Best Is Yet To Come"
Stan Getz & Astrud Gilberto - "The Girl From Ipanema"
Jane Birkin - "69 Année Érotique (en duo avec Gainsbourg)"
Françoise Hardy - "Ce petit coeur"
The Beatles - "In My Life"
Robert Plant & Alison Krauss - "Stick With Me Baby"
Stevie Wonder - "Ribbon In The Sky"
John Lee Hooker - "Dimples"
Frank Sinatra - "Always"
Ingrid Michaelson - "The Way I Am"
Jonathan Richman - "I Took A Chance On Her"
Vashti Bunyan - "Some Things Just Stick In Your Mind"
Roxy Music - "Take A Chance With Me"
Lush - "Sweetness And Light"
Ivy - "Edge Of The Ocean"
The Verve - "Space And Time"
Mazzy Star - "Fade Into You"
Ed Kuepper - "I'm With You"
The Jesus And Mary Chain - "My Girl"
Survivor - "The Search Is Over"
The Beatles - "Here There And Everywhere"
The Electric Prunes - "I Happen To Love You"
The Kinks - "Everybody's Gonna Be Happy"
Snow Patrol - "Chasing Cars"
The Call - "Like You Never Been Loved"
Maria McKee - "You Gotta Sin To Get Saved"
Little Heroes - "One Perfect Day"
Emmylou Harris - "(You Never Can Tell) C'est La Vie"
The Spinanes - "Sunday"
Love - "You I'll Be Following"
Tindersticks - "A Marriage Made In Heaven"
The Association - "Cherish"
Weezer - "Island In The Sun"
Brian Eno - "I'll Come Running"
The Lovetones - "Inside A Dream"
Goo Goo Dolls - "Give A Little Bit"
Lush - "For Love"
Aretha Franklin - "Respect"
The Drifters - "Save The Last Dance For Me"
Roy Orbison - "Oh, Pretty Woman"
Hope - "Who Am I To Say"
Manic Street Preachers - "Everything Must Go"
Tapes n Tapes - "Crazy Eights"
The Proclaimers - "I'm Gonna Be (500 Miles)"
Sarah Vaughan - "Ain't Misbehavin'"
Edwin Starr - "25 Miles"
The Four Tops - "I Can't Help Myself (Sugar Pie Honey Bunch)"
Spectrum - "How You Satisfy Me"
Talking Heads - "Take Me To The River"
Blondie - "Dreaming"
Katrina And The Waves - "Walking On Sunshine"
Glen Hansard & Marketa Irglova - "Falling Slowly"
Bob Seger - "Old Time Rock & Roll"
The Rolling Stones - "Happy"
Outkast - "Hey Ya!"
Ryan Adams - "Wonderwall"
Madonna - "Holiday"
Sister Sledge - "We Are Family"
Kool And The Gang - "Get Down On It"
Percy Sledge - "When A Man Loves A Woman"
James Brown - "I Got You (I Feel Good)"
Modern English - "I Melt With You"
The Pussycat Dolls - "Don't Cha"
No Doubt - "Underneath It All"
Julieta Venegas - "Limon y Sal"
Weddings Parties Anything - "Knockbacks In Halifax"
Persephone's Bees - "Paper Plane"
Smoking Popes - "Need You Around"
Doris Day - "A Bushel And A Peck"

Some music at Abbot and Mine's wedding:

Europe - The Final Countdown
Bonnie Tyler - Total Eclipse of the Heart
Chicago - You're my Inspiration
Stevie Wonder - Isn't She Lovely
David Bowie - Drive-in Saturday
Bauhaus - Passion of Lovers

uhhh, we had three cd's worth of stuff like this...

hahaha when did 'the final countdown' come on?

you two are probably the best couple of all time

plzzzzzzzzzzz tell me final countdown was the wedding march music

Final countdown was right after ceremony, like a "we're starting this!" thing. Devo Corporate Anthem was wedding march music.

yeah it was kind of like:
"you may now kiss the bride"....
BU DUH DAA NAAA
DO DOO DO DO DOOOO!

I even edited the file to start at the sweet spot.

Yeah, where it starts for GOB.

damn thats even better

abbott i hope u know if youd actually bothered to marry me i wouldve given it the same level of thought!!!

My cousin's wedding was a couple of weeks ago and along with the invites they included a little form for each guest to put down 3 songs that they would like to suggest to be played at the reception. They didn't promise to play all the selections, but there were definitely some and I guess that it gave them plenty of ideas at least. I thought it was a nice touch.

Umm... just found out last night that I have been tasked with making a 2.5 hour playlist for the wedding reception of my best friend (I am the best man). They are doing the "friends in shifts" thing and I am the last shift, and DJing longer than everyone else combined for the "reception off the hook and crucial hits" (groom's terms) portion of the night. I guess he trusts me to bring it.

Suddenly feeling nervous about this. I had an inkling I'd be DJing a portion and thought I could kill it, possibly on the sheer force of my own enthusiasm, but 2.5 hours of "reception off the hook"!?! Also I found out that most people there will be the bride's family and friends in their 20's and 30's. I know nothing about them other than they don't really drink much alcohol if any at all. That's admirable to live clean but makes the DJing task much more difficult.

I've DJed/playlisted weddings before and killed it every time without playing anything obvious, because the grooves are sick and the people are drunk and feeling very happy, but this demographic is largely not my friends/people my age (I'm 43). Do unknown 20-somethings know New Order - Temptation? Do they know Easy Lover?

I guess if I know the 70's disco/funk hits, why wouldn't 20-somethings know the 80's pop hits? They probably know Easy Lover, but does that sound like corny old-person-music to them?

Second thing making me nervous - I would totally play Robyn - Dancing On My Own and Dua Lipa - Don't Start Now, but how much should I pay attention to the lyrics? Are those too inappropriate? I figured it would be okay to slip in some inappropriate dance bangers here or there. I think lyrics don't really enter into most people's brains when dancing.

I guess if my target audience is the groom, I am confident I will kill it. If my target audience is the majority of the people there (bride's family/friends) I am worried I will be playing a bunch of shit they don't know, and I am not sure I even know what to play that they will know aside from the standard corny junk which I refuse to play unless someone requests it. I don't want to alienate most of the people there while me and the groom and 5 of our friends are going apeshit. But maybe that will be infectious and get the people to dance to the unfamiliar music.

Please advise. Wedding is in a week.

It’s easier than you might think, you just have to hit them with the corny obvious bangers. At a wedding the people in the crowd are not dance club people, they’re random people who might wanna dance if they’ve got something familiar. The cool kids will get into it ironically but have a blast anyway. Big cheesy fun stuff like ABBA and Queen - music has become so balkanised in the last decade or two that there are few unifying anthems anyway.
I went with “cred picks” for my own wedding and every time I think about that mixtape I sweated over, I shudder at how mis targeted it was.
Also - make 2 playlists, if one is going wrong flip to the other?

you just have to hit them with the corny obvious bangers

otm. but don't reach back further than the mid-70s. anyone old enough to dance to stuff older than 1975 will have run out of steam already

when i made our playlist we had added a song request to our RSVP so i had a bunch of stuff i knew at least someone wanted to hear. after that i did blocks of a couple tracks that were somewhat linked and targeted at a certain demo--one for like, my aunts, one for our college friends, etc. the hope was that there were no floor-clearers. you do need a couple corny bangers strategically placed. i wanna dance with somebody gets everybody going. that shut up and dance w/me song is punishingly good at its job.

i was sensitive to lyrical content like you, i agree most people don't notice but it bugs me personally so i avoided some stuff because of that.

matttkkkk otm throughout.

I've DJd a ton of wedding receptions. Very few became "off the hook."

Play a bunch of the "standard corny junk" (if that's your perception of Abba/Queen) plus some groom/bride requests. They very often spend so much time conversing with friends and family they won't much know/care. Wedding receptions are not an ideal place to showcase your musical erudition.

And don't forget a slow song or three. I've been to so many weddings that just keep spinning bangers one after the other. You'd be amazed what fitting in something like "At Last" by Etta James will do.

lol@"cred picks". otm post. but you can have your cred picks if enough of the crowd is into them and you space em out

our wedding song was a sentimental thing no one else really knew at all... right into Pretty Woman

i made 2 playlists for my wedding last summer & it was very useful & convenient to be able to switch between bangers & midtempo "we all just wanna chat now" grooves

Hahaha thanks everyone. I just needed a perspective adjustment and you all gave it to me. The groom is wanting 2.5 hours of "reception off the hook" and I was wondering how the hell I would pull that off. Answer = I can't.
Nobody can! I have been to, and DJed, some pretty off-the-hook wedding receptions though, with the bulk of the people dancing wildly. But not sustained for 2.5 hours. That's unrealistic.

Also he wants it to be a playlist that I DJ off of as I deem necessary, so like a hybrid playlist / live DJ. I guess in case shit needs to shift. Nobody's dancing? Macarena time! Here's Mambo No. 5! Just messin' with ya.

"Standard corny shit" means what people were talking about upthread about hired DJs playing the Macarena even though they told the DJ not to play it, because they can't break from their standard wedding template. Everyone's been to those weddings. I have zero problem playing Whitney Houston or Prince or Madonna or ABBA or Queen and I will at this wedding if the other DJs haven't already done so. In my experience I've found the real magic happens when you pull out a song that the bulk of people love but had forgotten about. Then sprinkle in some they don't know at all but sound great in the moment.

That said, it can be a gamble. I like music a lot more than most people. All of us here do. So sometimes I think a song is known by everyone and it's... not at all. Cyndi Lauper and Madonna? Safe. Nu Shooz and Taylor Dayne? Maybe not??? But then again Nu Shooz could be that "OH SHIT I LOVE THIS SONG!" magic moment.

I do have to throw the groom some bones though. Robyn's gonna happen even if most people won't know it.

i sustain. when's this going down?

this may be an oddball piece of advice but i would just go with the people getting married want. imagine making them feel really happy at that time, and then trust that all the other people that you don't know, whose music taste you're trying to guess at, also share a connection to the couple getting married, and that if they see them dancing and having a wonderful time, they'll want to join in on the fun

and if all else fails just play daft punk

philosophical question: if the couple getting married loves some categorically awful stuff, and the cool hip attendees of the wedding like cool hip music, which one do you play while they're all dancing?

for me, i'm playing the worst shit of all time that the people getting hitched love, trusting that the cool hip people will also be willing to sacrifice one night of music exploration for a night of hanging with the friends getting married instead

then again, i'm probably playing computer love and just enjoying it by myself. it depends on the night, depends on the crowd!

karl is more of a rehearsal party dj