your most important local news story the world must know about

there but for the grace of god go most of the people i went to high school with.
actually, that reminds me of an incident that happened junior year when i was at band camp (yes, lol american pie whatev) and a good friend got in an argument with a woman who had been brought in from a local college to help us better manage on-field spacing. they had been going back and forth all summer and dude had a habit (i think from watching the simpsons?) of lunging at people as if to strangle them while yelling "WHY YOU"... you know, typical dumbfuck highschool stuff. Only in this case he did it and she froze and he somehow ended up grabbing her and she promptly punched him in the nose and he started actually throttling her. he got expelled and thrown into a military school and disappeared out of our lives. He ended up enrolling in the armed forces; I didn't see him until a little over a decade later.

tl, dr: high school kids are all completely insane

Arkansas veterinarian operates on dog that ate 23 bullets

MOUNTAIN HOME, Ark. (AP) - An Arkansas veterinarian has kept a dog from going out with a bang after the animal ate 23 live rifle rounds.

Benno, the 4-year-old Belgian Malinois, had surgery last week to remove the .308 caliber ammunition from his stomach, The Baxter Bulletin reported.

Owner Larry Brassfield said Benno has eaten socks, magnets and marbles, but he didn't expect the animal would bother a bag of bullets by his bed. Brassfield and his wife realized Benno needed medical attention after the pet vomited up four rounds.

Veterinarian Sarah Sexton at All Creatures Animal Hospital removed 17 rounds from Benno's stomach but left two in his esophagus, which the dog was allowed to discharge on his own.

"This is something they certainly did not cover in school," Sexton said. "I've had dogs eat things before, mostly stuffed toys. Once I had one swallow a hearing aid, but I think this takes the cake."

Brassfield said he won't leave ammo lying around anymore but isn't optimistic that Benno will stick to dog food.

"You can baby-proof a house," Brassfield said. "But I don't think it's possible to Benno-proof a house. Lord knows, we've tried and failed."

beautiful

oh benno

Local to my hometown: Mayor since Jan 1987 has resigned from office before the end of his term. Adios Mayor Don.

wtf

Horace is very friendly. He probably didn't go with a struggle.

:(

this donkey's braying was a background constant throughout my childhood. i used to go and feed the ducks and take an apple for the donkey as the duck pond went past his field.

http://gawker.com/fbi-and-homeland-security-respond-to-shocking-goatse-bo-1704768347

in case you missed it, fizzles: https://www.facebook.com/TandridgePolice/posts/1064321006914645?fref=nf

https://twitter.com/gravesmeredith/status/601781393157443585

omg

that picture...

(insert trigger warning here)

yeeesh, don't click that

what is it?!?
least graphic description if possible

Brains of several animals littered upon a road. A separate article clarifies that they had at some point been preserved in formaldehyde. It still seems to be up in the air as to whether they were dog or sheep brains.

sorry, I probably fucked that up re: "least graphic".

wow that is pretty gross
nah thanks for the sober rendering!

that separate article helps MY mind deal with that; it sorta looked like somebody got a buncha beagles, trepanned, collected and distributed which was not an image i needed.

http://i.imgur.com/ebN4ydS.jpg

http://djournal.com/news/tornado-touches-down-amory/

AMORY – A tornado briefly touched down in Amory on Monday morning, affecting homes in a 25-block radius of the downtown area.

No one was killed or injured.

Monroe County Emergency Management Director Robert Goza said two homes were destroyed, 11 had major damage and 52 sustained minor damage.

The storm that hit around 9:30 a.m. uprooted trees at three major points, beginning at the First United Methodist Church in Amory, the area around Amory Middle School and Amory’s McAlpine Lake neighborhood.

There also was damage to the West Amory Elementary School and Early Learning Center, and two businesses had minor damage.

“It didn’t hit a big area,” said Sherriff Cecil Cantrell. “It just sort of sat down and blew a lot of trees around. Now there’s lots of flooding because of debris blocking drains and things. But there were no injuries as far as we know, unless somebody gets hurt trying to clean it up.”

Damage also was reported on Coontail and McAllister roads in Wren and across Highway 25 outside of Smithville. Some boats also were damaged at the marina there.

Justin Gibson, Sean McIntosh and John Callahan of the Amory Electric Department worked diligently to repair broken power lines around the First Methodist Church as soon as the storm had subsided. A large tree from the parsonage across the street had been blown across the road, blocking traffic.

“There are lots of trees down, but I don’t think there’s much damage,” Gibson said. “Those straight-line winds are probably what blew the trees down.”

The National Weather Service confirmed it that an EF0 tornado touched down briefly southwest of Amory, then an EF1 tornado touched down for 2.5 miles from Amory to the northeast toward Smithville.

FUMC member Bobbi Barnett, who lives just a few houses down from the church, emerged to check on the church as soon as she could. Anyone who was around in 2011, she said, is still very much wary of the weather since the EF-5 storm devastated nearby Smithville that year. Seventeen people were killed in Monroe County as a result of that tornado.

“It was just strange,” she said of Monday’s storm. “This storm this morning came up so quick. No thunder, no lightning, nothing.”

Over near the middle school, Michelle Hawkins agreed, as she watched chainsaw crews and a county worker in a back hoe shift debris from the street.

“There was hardly any time to get to shelter,” Hawkins said. “It hit just a few seconds after the sirens went off.”

Chainsaw worker Zack Jones said he saw the tornado swirling in the air, from his job at Riverbirch, just before it hit. Having experience with tools, Jones was one of many who appeared to lend a hand as soon as the storm let up. He and a slew of others worked on a house on North 7th Street, the worst-hit house on the road.

“I live around the corner, you know, I know these people,” Jones said. “This house is the only one I’ve seen with serious damage, but it’s got a tree on the front and the back. We’re trying to break it down without collapsing the house.”

For now, the Amory Police Department has blocked traffic through most of the affected area, and are asking the public to refrain from crowding the nearby streets.

“Like we said, no reports of injuries, so I guess the warning gave people just enough time,” said Lt. Nick Weaver. “Right now we’re working to get the roadways back open, then fix the power lines, then start working on getting folks’ yards cleaned up.”

“It’s a big mess,” said chainsaw worker Will Fredrick, “But thank God nobody was hurt.”

Fewer than 200 of the city electric system’s 8,000 customers lacked power late Monday, Mayor Brad Blalock told the Associated Press. Officials with the Monroe County Electric Power Association said about 1,500 of their 12,500 customers also lost power at one point, although all cooperative customers who could accept electricity had their lights back on Monday evening.

Mississippi Emergency Management Agency Director Robert Latham briefed Gov. Phil Bryant and plans to travel to Amory Tuesday to meet with city officials. MEMA has an area coordinator working in Amory to assist with state resources if necessary.

Residents that sustained damage from the storm should call Monroe County Emergency Management Agency at (662) 369-3683.

How close? (Besides "too close for comfort...")

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v296/WilliamCrump63/tornado%20052515.jpg

Pretty much right through. The storm we had in 2009 got our last big oak or we would have had more damage. A big pecan tree next door was blown down over the fence between yards, took out the power lines to both houses, took out the redbud tree we planted in 2004 and really loved. Got power back about 10:15 this morning, and it turns out we never lost broadband. The pecan didn't break the cable and it never detached from the utility pole or our house.

Give me volcanos and earthquakes any day.

yikes

sea lino invasion in Astoria, Oregon:

http://www.oregonlive.com/pacific-northwest-news/index.ssf/2015/04/sea_lion_boom_causing_big_prob.html

maybe this fake orca will scare them away, apparently it is more realistic than the last one they tried:

http://www.oregonlive.com/pacific-northwest-news/index.ssf/2015/05/man_will_bring_giant_fake_orca.html

oops "sea lion"

http://bigstory.ap.org/article/d22ac40bfbfc49d8aec7679c7b5fcfc8/illinois-man-backs-suv-through-garage-door-longtime-wish

important sea lion update:

http://www.seattletimes.com/nation-world/fake-orca-nearly-drowns-before-it-can-scare-ore-sea-lions/

http://gawker.com/philadelpihia-city-councilman-attends-white-lives-matt-1709105642

i can finally contribute this happened a block away from where i grew up

in case you missed it, fizzles: https://www.facebook.com/TandridgePolice/posts/1064321006914645?fref=nf🔗

thanks, yes! tho sorry to hear Horace won't be returning to his field, am hoping he has a decent retirement down in Cornwall.

Local to my hometown: Mayor since Jan 1987 has resigned from office before the end of his term. Adios Mayor Don.

― Florianne Fracke (La Lechera), Friday, May 8, 2015 4:44 PM (1 month ago) Bookmark

story has gotten much worse since this post. events will be listed in chronological order.

Because there were no deputy mayors, a guy named Moneypenny (forget his position, something in city council?) was inaugurated at the end of May
Five or six days later, he confessed to having touched a colleague "inappropriately" during the time between the long-term mayor's unexpected resignation and his inauguration (lots of speculation about this, too much to note)
A week or so after that, he straight up resigned, making him the shortest term-serving mayor
The president of city council, who has no idea how to be mayor, is now the mayor for the remainder of the long-term mayor's term
Long term mayor is MIA and has been seen wearing a neck brace for no publicized reason
Petitions to run for the office are due at 4pm today, field of candidates is growing like a pervasive fungus, including some guy who calls himself Hunk@ Kaboom

meanwhile, ppl are going bananas over hometown basketball hero (understandably) and no one seems too concerned about the state of the city
:(

LL:

http://www.newsnet5.com/news/local-news/akron-canton-news/odd-walking-stick-belonging-to-natural-hunka-kaboom-causes-stir-at-akron-city-hall

http://www.ohio.com/news/break-news/explosion-ignites-vacant-home-in-north-akron-1.415926

!

"If you've got a pipe that says Kaboom on it, I'd be nervous too," one neighbor said.

this kaboom guy is amazing

god how depressing
that's the neighborhood where i grew up

Little Rock Police Chief Kenton Buckner loses gun

After Little Rock Police Chief Kenton Buckner reported his department-issued handgun missing, he was issued a written reprimanded from City Manager Bruce Moore, KARK reports.

Buckner said he realized the gun was missing after a Memorial Day move from an apartment to a newly purchased home.

Buckner called the missing gun "regrettable." He reimbursed the department for the gun's value, according to KARK.

Naked man goes on rampage at Grantchester tea garden near Cambridge, jumps in river and barks at dog

attn: how's life
http://www.capitalgazette.com/news/ph-ac-cn-confederate-flag-0628-20150628-story.html

Yes, both the Edgewater guys quoted at the end of the article are from my neighborhood.

Starting today, Oregon gets legal weed, but Mississippi gets concealed carry with no permit needed.

http://www.theargus.co.uk/news/13366085.Magnet_man_attempts_to_outwit_10p_machine_on_Palace_Pier/

that story had me checking up on this:

The ten pence coin was originally minted from cupro-nickel (75% Cu, 25% Ni), but since 2012 it has been minted in nickel-plated steel due to the increasing price of metal. From January 2013 the Royal Mint began a programme to gradually remove the previous cupro-nickel coins from circulation with replacement by the nickel-plated steel versions.

'Vicious' fox traps eight people in Cambridgeshire sports club

Panic reigned, with a woman being bitten, a man falling off his bicycle as he was chased and a pest controller being pursued back to his car.

Club chairman Bruce Staines, who was chased around the car park, said he had "never seen anything like it".

Mr Staines admitted he "tweaked his groin" trying to get away from the marauding animal and back to the safety of the club.

http://www.irishtimes.com/news/crime-and-law/courts/district-court/court-hears-very-attractive-bachelor-struggled-to-clear-bar-1.2273032

great bantz from the judge too

gang members here renting Car2Go for drivebys now 🎆🎉2️⃣0️⃣1️⃣5️⃣🎊🎈

http://www.denverpost.com/news/ci_28434018/police-denver-drive-by-shooting-suspects-rode-car2go

http://www.southwales-eveningpost.co.uk/Police-hunt-man-left-baby-platform-urinated-seats/story-26876666-detail/story.html

"CCTV enquiries show a man entering the station with a baby in a pushchair. A short time later, he urinates on the seats in the waiting shelter before proceeding to rip a bicycle free of its lock.

"While stealing the bike, the child was left unattended in the pushchair, just a few feet away from the track.

"He then finishes a drink he had with him and throws the empty can on the floor before leaving the station with the stolen bike."

What makes them so sure there was a child in the pushchair? Maybe he stole the pushchair.

i drive past this school every day these people are assholes
http://patch.com/pennsylvania/balacynwyd/main-line-catholic-school-upholds-decision-fire-educator-due-same-sex-marriage

The Tupelo newspaper's publisher/CEO is an asshole...
http://djournal.com/opinion/clay-foster-the-sacredness-of-marriage-and-recent-court-decisions/
...and the paper won't run same-sex wedding announcements...
http://www.huffingtonpost.com/robbie-ward/mississippi-newspaper-ban_b_7765146.html
...and tells staff at all the papers in the publishing group "don't have a public opinion about this if you know what's good for you"...
http://www.huffingtonpost.com/robbie-ward/mississippi-newspaper-sil_b_7788212.html