rolling new food laboratory inventions for american chain restaurants thread

def a "you can brag to your friends that you ate this garbage" criteria to many food lab inventions that fake ghost pepper toppings fulfill

ah, yeah. i was deceived by the wendy's ghost pepper cheese fries because it has chopped peppers on it. apparently those are jalapenos and the ghost pepper is the sauce.

glad that's settled.

http://burgerbusiness.com/mcdonalds-tests-smaller-tastecrafted-platform/

Because ordering from Subway is so awesome. Now you can also tell a McDonalds employee how to make a sandwich!

you can tell them how but have them tell you no actually we can't do that we can only do whats been TASTECRAFTED and you say but i thought this was like a i have it my way thing and they say no i've never heard of that being done before but that's not what this is it is TASTECRAFTED so do you still want the pico guacamole or not

ghost peppah he don't fuck with me

http://i60.tinypic.com/11tq7b8.jpg

Here's your new Hamburglar, guys.

omg hipster doucheburglar

Tynan?

lol i will be appropriating 'doucheburglar'

douche burglar, male gurgler

lol crut

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XbBP5KxrNNg

Good to know even the Hamburglar doesn't fuck with McDonald's anymore except on special occasions.

for fuck's sake is this gonna be some PTSD Manchurian Candidate shit where suburban doucheburglar is AWAKENED by some fuckin' McDonalds promo
Sterling Cooper Drake Price wouldn't have let this shit out of the brainstorming session, i call bullshit

i like how they think that a whispered baritone "robble robble" is gonna be a major catchphrase with all the kids
FUCK OFF MCDONALD'S YOU GUYS ARE TERRIBLE

if we're lucky it'll come to be something you say to mock bad advertising

or when sexing rob huebel

"you see millennials crave excitement... but they also need to know that they have security, a home to go back to when the moment to cut loose has past. they want to be someone who can manage a family, have their own interest... but has to let the animal out. gentlemen, what this generation craves... is a new hamburglar. and who else but mcdonald's is going to give it to them? James, can you get the lights?"

http://i2.kym-cdn.com/entries/icons/original/000/003/189/heath_ledger_joker.jpeg

WHY...SO...ROBBULOUS?

http://www.usatoday.com/story/money/2015/05/11/coming-to-an-olive-garden-near-you-breadstick-sandwiches/27120031/

not quite food lab breakthru but

can't help hearing

http://i.ytimg.com/vi/N4OPr_QxoFg/hqdefault.jpg

"Bread stick sandwiches!"

http://i.imgur.com/nhCNCks.jpg

The Holy Trinity

ah, the kentaco hut, a rarity in most regions

we have a kentaco in my area, though

I love the mixed architecture.

The Pizza Hut dome:

http://i.imgur.com/wsbsEUk.jpg

The awning throwback to the old slanted Taco Bell roofs:

http://i.imgur.com/eWme8u4.jpg

A proud departed leader surveys his people from above:

http://i.imgur.com/hWs5vII.jpg

Never heard the phrase "Kentaco Hut" until I saw Young Adult. It is pretty magnificent

I did appreciate the regionalisms in that movie, felt like home. Or at least one state north of home.

KENTACO HUT KEEPS POURING' DOWN

And hell, YUM! is based in Louisville, they should totally work on that.

in my experience, the two-brand ones have a single counter where you can order items from the combined menu, whereas the three-brand ones are sometimes large enough to have three distinct counters to order from

I want a single, transdimensional counter that, as the customer stands fixed, whirls through space and time to access all menu lines and dayparts, past and present. Not the future, though; there'd be nothing to hope for, nor reason to keep on living.

You've seen these before, but they still kill me:

http://i.imgur.com/xR9uYy3.jpg

http://i.imgur.com/JBd8f6k.jpg

half expecting to see a stargate in the background

Ricky Gervais has been responsible for one or two good things.

http://i.imgur.com/fPqkM0t.jpg

"They will last for thousands of years, and on one day, Pharaoh, your Sphinx will photobomb some tourist eating at the Pizza Hut across the street."

http://i.imgur.com/AuEJJkz.jpg

lol

pyramid with a jaunty hat

I want a single, transdimensional counter that, as the customer stands fixed, whirls through space and time to access all menu lines and dayparts, past and present.

Interstellar spoiler

http://usedtobeapizzahut.blogspot.com

excellent

That's great! Wish there was one for old IHOPs. I remember an Indian restaurant outside of Princeton, NJ with that old triangular style building.

there's an old KFC down the street from me that has been a taco shop for several years, they literally just today added some signage on the exterior conveying that inside tacos are for sale

PHPD
http://i.kinja-img.com/gawker-media/image/upload/s--NMK6NHK3--/c_fit,fl_progressive,q_80,w_636/jogcjoxdz4chbeptblph.jpg

That is now a bbq restaurant called Jethro's

(it's in my neighborhood)

i could swear i linked this recently but looking back maybe it was another thread. anyway:

Not Fooling Anybody: A Chronicle of Bad Conversions and Storefronts Past

the police station one now looks like this:
http://www.jethrosdesmoines.com/wp-content/uploads/IMG_0212-1024x682.jpg

xp Hat Creek!!!

http://i58.tinypic.com/10xvka9.jpg

http://www.thrillist.com/eat/nation/carl-s-jr-testing-flamin-hot-cheetos-burger

They already have the incredible weather and great tacos, but here's yet another reason to hate LA: they're the only ones with the Carl's Jr. Flamin' Hot Cheetos burger. A Wreckless Eating fan named James tipped the site off to the new item, which features the bright red Cheetos and a cheddar cheese sauce atop a beef patty. (Along with lettuce, tomato, and what looks like pepper Jack cheese.) Little else is known about the Thickburger for now, but if you come across it, you should order it without hesitation. Because remember: Flamin' Hot Cheetos are a health food.

Carl's Jr. are the fucking worst IMHO. They treat the disgusting-oversized-coronary-burger competition like an arms race and have lame, porny commercials. Shitty fries, too, since they got rid of their original zig-zag formed mashed potato fry recipe.

PHPD
― slam dunk, Thursday, May 14, 2015 12:44 PM Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

http://i.imgur.com/dyXXnxA.png

http://www.prnewswire.com/news-releases/ihop-restaurants-support-breakfastarian-community-300085363.html

IHOP has been tapping into the philosophy behind the breakfastarian belief that breakfast can be enjoyed day or night since it opened the first restaurant in 1958.

"IHOP restaurants are famous the world over as the expert in breakfast items that guests love, like our legendary buttermilk pancakes, waffles and omelettes, and as the place where you have always been able to go to enjoy a great breakfast any time of day," said Kirk Thompson, Vice President, Marketing, International House of Pancakes, LLC. "So not only are we fully behind the breakfastarian community, you could say that we are breakfastarians ourselves."

Breakfastarian