rolling fuck this shit worst songs of 2015 thread

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between video and song this is a pretty good contender for worst of the year imo
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HSam5sBjvPk
"Most video directors thought my ideas were too zany, I forced myself to learn how to edit and directed the video myself, and who better to star in my video then The Fat Jewish who has always been a supporter of my Instagram page. I wanted to create something that made you feel like you were on drugs and portrayed internet culture in a nutshell."

Premise ridiculous. Who have two potato? (forksclovetofu), Monday, 20 April 2015 21:31 (four years ago) link

It gave me a headache and so I took an aspirin, so technically speaking I suppose I do now feel like I'm on drugs.

Three Word Username, Tuesday, 21 April 2015 08:23 (four years ago) link

i was able to last 1 minute before shutting it down

j. winters (josh), Tuesday, 21 April 2015 19:02 (four years ago) link

SPLURT
#OMW2SYG
"The Fat Jew"
"Swiggity Swooty I'm Comin Fo Dat Booty"
pseudo-"RAPPA POM POM!"-dancehall stylez
champagne facial
sub-tim and eric video skills
"OFFICIAL MERCH"
recurring iphone framing
#SWOOTYDANCE

Premise ridiculous. Who have two potato? (forksclovetofu), Tuesday, 21 April 2015 19:16 (four years ago) link

i'm just saying this has everything you want from a legit worst song of 2015 contender

Premise ridiculous. Who have two potato? (forksclovetofu), Tuesday, 21 April 2015 19:16 (four years ago) link

This might be a controversial offering, but Little Big Town has a new Top 40 crossover called "Girl Crush." It's not about platonic admiration of another woman, it's about being furiously jealous of a girl who gets to date someone she has a standard crush on. Even the intimations of lesbian urges are couched in this jealousy. I want to taste her lips is followed by Yeah, 'cause they taste like you.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JYZMT8otKdI

Hoping this doesn't start some "is it right or wrong to be offended/not offended" thing, but using the phrase "i've got a girl crush" to mean "i wish that i was jessie's girl" seems pretty fucking tragic

da croupier, Thursday, 23 April 2015 19:09 (four years ago) link

turns out jezebel already wrote about the song (figured it made the radar of people who don't wait till it hits the top 40), but in terms of country audiences not digging the saphphic winks, rather than the co-option of the phrase "girl crush" to mean something bitter

http://themuse.jezebel.com/little-big-towns-girl-crush-a-perfect-storm-of-country-1693794535

da croupier, Thursday, 23 April 2015 19:16 (four years ago) link

i'm not saying your take is necessarily wrong, but that song is great

Premise ridiculous. Who have two potato? (forksclovetofu), Thursday, 23 April 2015 19:19 (four years ago) link

feel like a song like this generates its energy *because* its gets its own core concept wrong. it's "annoying."

goole, Thursday, 23 April 2015 19:21 (four years ago) link

yeah i wonder if it would do as well if the line was "I have a hate crush"

da croupier, Thursday, 23 April 2015 19:25 (four years ago) link

like, everyone knows what "girl crush" means, everyone knows what lesbianism is, even way down there in nashville. this is... both! neither! some other thing! about a dude anyway!

goole, Thursday, 23 April 2015 19:28 (four years ago) link

i think "girl crush" is a beautiful song and i love it but i feel your take croup

phrases like 'man crush'/'woman crush' etc have just become another 'no homo' anyways (perhaps they always were but at first it was at least kinda charming that heteros were getting less uptight abt expressing strong maybe-physical admiration for members of the same sex)

dyl, Thursday, 23 April 2015 19:52 (four years ago) link

it's definitely well written, catchy, etc. not pretending there's songs i love that aren't also reprehensible and depressing in their pandering/co-option.

da croupier, Thursday, 23 April 2015 19:55 (four years ago) link

i see that charlie puth is (rightly) an alum of this thread, i only realized yesterday via radio dj chatter that his surname is pronounced 'pooth'

dyl, Thursday, 23 April 2015 19:55 (four years ago) link

it's about mimetic desire

drash, Thursday, 23 April 2015 20:06 (four years ago) link

Cant wait to find out whether Blake or brad gets to be the guy at a country music awards show who talks about someone with a hot wife and then sings "I got a guy crush" to applause

da croupier, Thursday, 23 April 2015 20:34 (four years ago) link

"girl crush," as an expression, I thought expressed or expresses something important for which it felt like there hadn't been a good phrase before. an experience people had and recognized. ime it was never "no homo" in the way that "man crush" usually got laden with (due to bro-ist usage from pretty early on i think, and much more commonly used as "YOU have a man crush on him, ha ha ha!"). it was a good thing for our culture to have more ways of women expressing admiration, solidarity, and even the kind of passionate but not necessarily sexual (but not necessarily not) feelings you can have towards other people, especially when you're young and they just seem so tremendously awesome and amazing. but our pop music just leaves this all behind.

woolf:

It was protective, on her side; sprang from a sense of being in league together, a presentiment of something that was bound to part them (they spoke of marriage always as a catastrophe), which led to this chivalry, this protective feeling which was much more on her side than Sally's. For in those days she was completely reckless; did the most idiotic things out of bravado; bicycled round the parapet on the terrace; smoked cigars. Absurd, she was--very absurd. But the charm was overpowering, to her at least, so that she could remember standing in her bedroom at the top of the house holding the hot-water can in her hands and saying aloud, "She is beneath this roof.... She is beneath this roof!"

team dresch:

It's where the obvious turns dumb, and clarity turns off
I'm standing somewhere near the back of the room
I'm on my left - I'm in between her
She's amazing, her words save me
She holds her head as if it's truth

and we get, what, "i kissed a girl and i liked it"? i might be a little out of date with that reference. and not being a pop-hating snob, just a pop lover disappointed in the state of the art.

Doctor Casino, Sunday, 26 April 2015 15:28 (four years ago) link

well like i was getting at with the brad-paisley-at-the-cmas scenario, if a guy sang about mimetic desire (a phrase i didn't actually know before it came up here!) and referred to it in anguished self-seriousness as a "guy crush", people would be rofling. but between this and "i kissed a girl" - where katy keeps demeaning the smoochee as an "experimental game" etc - pop is clearly ok with the idea of these kinds of self-loathing erotic impulses coming from women.

and to be clear, i can totally understand being affected by "girl crush" AS an ugly expression of mimetic desire - "Kissed A Girl" is probably one of my favorite Katy Perry songs because of that weird, contemptuous undertone. i just find it depressing that 20 years after "rebel girl," THIS is how the phrase "girl crush" makes the top 40.

da croupier, Sunday, 26 April 2015 15:46 (four years ago) link

DC & dc otm

drash, Sunday, 26 April 2015 16:10 (four years ago) link

as hot a take as "those backwards hillbillies who listen to country" is for sites who only cover music for the viral angles, the "controversy" is largely not:

http://m.billboard.com/entry/view/id/119493

katherine, Sunday, 26 April 2015 16:30 (four years ago) link

yeah i was kinda surprised when i searched for commentary about this song and just found "can hillbillies handle GIRLS KISSING?" as if the GIRLS KISSING aspect wasn't couched in male-flattering lovers-triangle talk

da croupier, Sunday, 26 April 2015 16:44 (four years ago) link

KRYS Corpus Christi, Texas, has only recently begun spinning the song, and while PD Big Frank Edwards says it's too soon to gauge a response, he adds, "I'm a narrow-minded, conservative, eighth generation Texan, and I think the song is fine."

Premise ridiculous. Who have two potato? (forksclovetofu), Sunday, 26 April 2015 16:49 (four years ago) link

gonna end all my reviews like that

katherine, Sunday, 26 April 2015 17:07 (four years ago) link

totally. "I'm a simple, eighth-generation hyper-chicken from a narrow-minded, backwoods asteroid, and I think the song is fine."

and ha, i almost brought up "rebel girl" rather than "she's amazing."

Doctor Casino, Sunday, 26 April 2015 21:59 (four years ago) link

Apologies if this has been posted but i wanted to share the horror (i saw it on a friends FB wall - think there was an article about it somewhere perhaps as apparently the band have record industry exec connections)

anyway its just plain bad imo but judge for yourself
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Jfol9YlSvPc

Eric Burdon & War, On Drugs (Cosmic Slop), Tuesday, 28 April 2015 21:21 (four years ago) link

those guys scored an NYT profile
http://www.nytimes.com/2015/03/26/arts/music/sxsw-pays-off-for-the-prettiots.html?_r=0
i never got around to hearing it
it is not good on first listen

Premise ridiculous. Who have two potato? (forksclovetofu), Tuesday, 28 April 2015 21:28 (four years ago) link

I don't know if I want to listen to it again necessarily but I found it inoffensive. Shit band name though. Like a portmanteau of pretty and Poirot. v bad

Leonard Pine, Tuesday, 28 April 2015 21:28 (four years ago) link

the NYT profile says it's a portmanteau of 'pretty' and 'idiots'. 'The Poirots' would be a nice band name

soref, Tuesday, 28 April 2015 21:39 (four years ago) link

lol i was going to say "oh leave em alone, that cheap video implies they're not out of the oven yet" but it turns out the video was directed by richard kern

da croupier, Tuesday, 28 April 2015 21:43 (four years ago) link

I find the premise of the song amusing, but the execution kinda lets it down -- & that singing style is terrible, of course, but I've resigned myself to the fact that it's here to stay

Heroic melancholy continues to have a forceful grip on (bernard snowy), Tuesday, 28 April 2015 21:53 (four years ago) link

i asked my friend where she saw it and it was here. Didn't know about the NY Times article.
http://martiandanceinvasion.blogspot.com.au/2015/03/the-starving-artists-of-1.html

Eric Burdon & War, On Drugs (Cosmic Slop), Tuesday, 28 April 2015 21:54 (four years ago) link

Danny goldberg's daughter? Just warning 90s folks - if you hate that on principle, you also have to hate That Dog

da croupier, Tuesday, 28 April 2015 21:57 (four years ago) link

the drummer is the all grow(ing)-up Trachtenberg Family daughter; thought i knew her from somewhere

Premise ridiculous. Who have two potato? (forksclovetofu), Tuesday, 28 April 2015 22:09 (four years ago) link

T/S Richard Kern vs Larry Clark

the top man in the language department (誤訳侮辱), Tuesday, 28 April 2015 22:14 (four years ago) link

yeah, I was about to say, this sounds exactly like a that dog. song

katherine, Tuesday, 28 April 2015 23:59 (four years ago) link

(and IMO is far too good for this thread, also pretty good in general, also if you want to dismiss artists offhand because of their parents you've got a fuck of a lot of artists to dismiss)

katherine, Wednesday, 29 April 2015 00:01 (four years ago) link

i said the song was shit before i read anything about them

Eric Burdon & War, On Drugs (Cosmic Slop), Wednesday, 29 April 2015 00:03 (four years ago) link

Yeah, this song is alright at best and ignorable at worst. I suspect they have the potential to make some REALLY BAD songs in the future, tho.

Johnny Fever, Wednesday, 29 April 2015 00:04 (four years ago) link

seems like glossy antifolk to me which i can like with proper massaging but there's not much going on there that makes me wanna stick around; though i agree it's not fuck this shit worst and there's a certain degree of not unfair to presume dog whistle commentary that goes along with slagging it as such
i would link to frankie cosmos' "birthday song" as "child of famous parents DIY lo-fi done right " corrective but i don't want that song in this thread

Premise ridiculous. Who have two potato? (forksclovetofu), Wednesday, 29 April 2015 00:08 (four years ago) link

the NYT profile says it's a portmanteau of 'pretty' and 'idiots'.

well that's prettiotic

I suspect they have the potential to make some REALLY BAD songs in the future, tho.

They have the potential to make some great songs too, surely.

Leonard Pine, Wednesday, 29 April 2015 15:20 (four years ago) link

That song doesn't even annoy me as much as "88 lines about 44 girls."

subject's companion from prior surveillance (GOTT PUNCH II HAWKWINDZ), Thursday, 30 April 2015 02:19 (four years ago) link

He's whistling now

saer, Thursday, 30 April 2015 11:59 (four years ago) link

Judging from the video I was dreading that the Prettiots song was going to feature the first boyfriend singing at some point, but: Garfunkel and Oates > this song > Jesus H. Christ and the Four Hornsmen of the Apocalypse.

cr4bdbgs, Thursday, 30 April 2015 13:39 (four years ago) link

new britney/iggy goes here, though weirdly the instrumental is GREAT

katherine, Sunday, 3 May 2015 00:17 (four years ago) link

iggy at least figured out what rhymes with iggy
(spoiler: it's iggy)

Leonard Pine, Monday, 4 May 2015 15:06 (four years ago) link

Well at least she's not trying to compare herself to Biggie.

MarkoP, Monday, 4 May 2015 15:09 (four years ago) link

Yeah, I actually really like the instrumental, particularly the bit leading into the chorus. Shame about the rest of it.

Greer, Monday, 4 May 2015 15:39 (four years ago) link

two weeks pass...

The worst song of 2015 has arrived. Please start polishing Christopher Owens' crown:

https://soundcloud.com/chri55ybaby/selfish-feelings/s-rTLPU

afriendlypioneer, Friday, 22 May 2015 14:35 (four years ago) link

Ha, that guy's still around?

Johnny Fever, Friday, 22 May 2015 14:47 (four years ago) link

this fuckin' guy

maura, Friday, 22 May 2015 16:06 (four years ago) link


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