Just when you thought it was safe - OK CUPID PART 3: The Return of the WOO!

I hear you there

lol dayo

I would agree if "ironically" modified "date"

strongly considering redoing my bio using nothing but fall lyrics

you won't find anything more ridiculous than this new profile

initial message should def. be "hey there fuckface"

lol

haha

too much romantic here

message for ya! message for ya!

:D

Became a recluse, bought a computer
Set it up in my home
Elusive big one

nsfw-ish:
https://41.media.tumblr.com/c7008efe0de87b0b4ae877e3446a62c3/tumblr_nhqu34gSGg1rsxqqio1_1280.jpg

bold choice

They call me.... Tim.

http://images.fanpop.com/images/image_uploads/Tim-monty-python-and-the-holy-grail-591629_800_441.jpg

Ah wait someone already did that in response to same picture pierre menard to thread

I spent an evidently not-small amount of time organizing my profile so that it lists "things I like" in ascending order of sentence length, and then lists "things I dislike" in descending order, so that the two lists are symmetrical. I don't know if this comes off as bored and pathetic, hyper-OCD crazy, or else looks cool?

I'm also starting to question my technique of hiding profiles I'm not interested in. While hiding people I decidedly don't intend to message or hypothetically respond to makes browsing matches a zillion times easier, I just checked and have apparently hid over 2500 profiles (!) which seems pretty sad in a pathetic and bored, hyper-OCD way. Ugliness and awful personality aside, I think this may also explain why I never get any messages or profile views. Ugh, how am I so bad at using this site?

they should sell an a-list service of filtering out ppl who lived in brooklyn for x years but now are 'back'

http://www.vox.com/2015/7/6/8900487/race-multiracial-dating-study

just came across a profile that was just too suspiciously long. dumped it into Word for a count: just shy of 20k words

what are people even doing out there.

daaaaamn

I'm back out there. Reopened an account I closed last year, really need to clean it the hell up. You'd think my self-presentation would be a little more stable across less than a year but ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

hopefully some stories for the thread denizens soon

update: deleted all the vague boring semi-twee personal shit and changed my username

Not to Upright Mammal, I hope.

it's good

museum of the poor souls in purgatory

so you signed up

promising 5.5 hour first date, now living the cliche of who contacts whom next. Feeling like it should be him as he messed up timing of date 1 and then start time of rescheduled date 1.

It SHOULD be but he will doubtless mess that up too so save yourself the anxiety of waiting.

yeeeeeah maybe on Wednesday or so? date was Friday.

So. Date was Friday and he suggested a second date at the end of it, specifically, coffee and a walk. I texted him on Monday (did not hold out any longer despite above bravado) to suggest a location. Now it is Wednesday.

All his previous communications about timing screw-ups have been very effusive and apologetic, so it seems a bit out of character to just disappear. There's always the Lost Phone Possibility, but nah. He has (of course) looked at OKC since Friday, so he hasn't fallen under a bus. Is it even possible to just straight up not notice a text?

I guess it's more likely that he is a gaslighting fool. If I haven't heard by the weekend, would it be too demeaning to write and say 'I'm taking the silence as 'I'm no longer interested', correct?'

yeah don't write that

yeah :/ almost impossible to get the tone right.

Technology enables people to be new and exciting types of asshole, expressing any emotion about it is a sign of weakness. Welcome to our shitty future.

ljubljana - make your own plans for the w/end if you can, assuming the worse. If he gets back you can always put him back a week later.

Yeah, I'll definitely make my own plans in the meantime. I'm just wondering whether it's even possible that people actually manage to miss texts.

may be possible but essentially no

No.

Also this person can always log on via a laptop and email something.

a fool imo

^

yeah. ugh, frustrating.

yeah. you are all OTM. I may message something for closure purposes in order not to imagine myself in a dating sitcom where he thinks I wasn't interested enough to contact him (he was kind of effusive about me at the end of the date, I didn't know what to say back and just said yes, it would be nice to meet again). But in all overwhelming likelihood a fool.

Setting up another date to distract myself.

not you -- him!

effusive is sometimes lovely! but...i've become cynical about this. sometimes that kind of enthusiasm can be a weird manipulative thing.

effusive & also flaky? yes, write this guy off.

hope new dates are less confusing/frustrating.

the effusiveness isn't reliable. when I'm nervous I do that and it's a reflex; totally unrelated to how I actually feel.

this sucks ljub, i'm sorry.

i have to say, tho: "so it seems a bit out of character to just disappear." i dunno about that; it's in-character for anyone to just disappear. the "rules" as they have been drilled into me are that after only 1 date nobody owes anyone any communication.

This guy only just sounds flaky. Which, you know, even though he's into you and you're into him, would you even be prepared to put up with this kind of shit?

I'm the kind to miss texts if they pop up while I'm doing something and I already have another one unread so my Unread indicator doesn't trigger anything for me.. but I'm a total flake

I was in a similar situation a couple months ago, wherein after an endless string of obviously "ehh" dates w/ various people I met thru OKC, I actually had a really fun one wherein there was some uh anecdotal evidence to suggest I was safe in assuming we'd have another, then when I texted her I got no reply ever. I asked multiple friends independently if a followup text would be at all warranted and received multiple independent HELL NOs so I left that shit alone. It STILL kinda bugs me tbh

The other bit of recent OKC fun that has led to my latest long break - about 1.5-2 months ago I started msging with this girl who seemed almost cartoonishly cool, and after a volley of unusually long messages I asked if she'd be down for a meetup, and she said sure but she didn't even know my name! So we exchanged names, and then...just kept talking. Reliably messaging back and forth every 2-3 days, in longform (by OKC standards). Then after a while I brought it up again and she said she'd be moving to a new place and visiting family for the following week or so, but definitely when she gets back. I figure I should wait to see if she actually cares enough to message when she returns. Then she does indeed send a message upon returning, like clockwork, but again makes no mention of a meetup. After a couple more messages it becomes clear that she expects a third ask? Or to keep avoiding the idea forever?

I uh disabled my acct instead. I foresaw no good end.

you were right

i've had two incidents on the site where i struck up a convo with a really cool looking person who seemed initially enthusiastic about meeting but when it came time to nail down times & places clammed up and then eventually deleted (or blocked me, i think it looks the same). i suspect phishing? or something shady? i suppose it's hard to differentiate it from run-of-the-mill pre-dating inertia, but in both cases they were "new to town" or the similar users section was all women from some other part of the country. i've been off it for a while now, that was def a reason.

is it me or is this site basically dying? being killed by tinder? i've peeked in every now and again with a friends' dummy account and the userbase seems way smaller and more stagnant than what i remember when i first tried it.

lol it hadn't even occurred to me that it would look to her like I blocked her. oh well!