rolling new food laboratory inventions for american chain restaurants thread

i love that the people at my place know my name but i would be put out if they thought they knew my order, and would haaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaate it if a computer did it. though, if it was that kind of place i probably wouldn't be there in the first place.

Jesus Christ, World. STOP TRYING TO DO THIS.

― me, now (now)

Y'all are crazy. I hope it gets to the point where a robot recognizes me when I walk in and they automatically give me a nutrient pill. Then 5 years later I want to print said nutrient pill at home instead.

lol at 龜's pic from one of my favorite films

my friend is a very personable guy these days and will talk at length to the wait staff at places we go to for lunch, and I feel like kind of a dick because my impulses fall partially into the "I don't want to be a known regular" column with a little splash of "I am the dick who treats people like anonymous food-serving robots" guilt

can't wait for the big reveal where my friend finds out they treat him like an anonymous robot customer, and the reason they remember topics of past conversation was that it was recorded in a computer

lol

i don't see the problem with treating people like anonymous food-serving robots as long as you're respectful and polite

I don't mind going to the local pizza joint and the server asking if I want a pint of the usual. But walking into a fucking McDonald's and the cashier saying, "Good morning, Mr. Plans! Looking for another little girl's Happy Meal (based on your previous order?)" is not something I want to deal with.

And I want to pay with money or by offering a debit/credit card of some sort. Don't just lift the shit out of my pocket from thin air.

i don't see the problem with treating people like anonymous food-serving robots as long as you're respectful and polite

Maybe this is long-deserved revenge on customers who go "Well there, *looks at nametag* - 'Somer', I'll have one of your finest chocolate milkshakes please."

you think that's bad, wait until they start offering new menu items they've extrapolated you might want based on past data

xp it is def preferable to the tude I would get from the fellas at B4rt's car store.

Kind of wonder if the edible coffee cups also contain drinkable coffee

http://www.businesswire.com/news/home/20150316005153/en/Chicken-Charge-BURGER-KING%C2%AE-Restaurants#.VQhOFxDF88Z

Starting today, Gloria, the unbiased bird, will make that tough call. She is going on the national Random Gloria tour in her custom-designed coop to determine if Chicken Fries will be available at certain BURGER KING® restaurants. Kicking off in the New York area, she will make her way across the nation, stopping at select locations with bursting contingencies of Chicken Fries fans.

Chicken Fries enthusiasts are invited to come cheer on Gloria in person or watch the live stream at www.chickenfries.com as she makes her decision. Each day when she arrives with her expert handler, she will ascend from her plush coop onto her custom decision-making stage and randomly choose whether or not Chicken Fries will return to that BURGER KING® restaurant. It's simple – if Gloria chooses “yes,” Chicken Fries will be on the menu at that location. If she chooses “no,” sorry, no Chicken Fries that day. Like it or not, Gloria has the final word. She can’t be bought, seduced or swayed. After the decision, fans can take celebratory or sad-face photos with her.

'bursting contingencies'

hiring a chicken to make decisions about eating the flesh of other chickens is some sick shit imo

is she unbiased or is she random

is she choosing locations on the merits or is it just a cruel joke of fate that a chicken decides your diet for you

haha

Born and raised at Starlight Ranch in Lake Elsinore, CA, Gloria is a three-year-old Rhode Island Red chicken.

Ever since she was a little chick, Gloria aspired to take the spotlight. Her friends on the farm adored her for her charisma and wit. And now, she finally has the perfect stage to showcase her talents.

it's like there's a vegan apostate working for their ad agency

seriously wtf are they thinking

Oh man, Bayonne NJ livestream in 47 minutes.

Is a Chicken in Charge of BURGER KING® Restaurants?

for years fast food ad campaigns were limited to only having cartoon versions of animals eat themselves and think they were delicious

but soon, with cutting-edge genetic research, we will finally be able to have live chickens take bites out of themselves with three-pronged cartoon forks and then shoot a big grin at the customer before using their free wing to give a thumbs-up sign

I think the P'Zolo (tm) can already do that

Gloria sounds delicious

can they grind her into a thin paste and then batter fry her first though

I want to know Herzog's take on this.

lol it would be the burger king in fucking bayonne

Have you seen this? http://fortune.com/2015/03/16/starbucks-baristas-race-talk/

an initiative launched this week by the coffee store chain to stimulate conversation and debate about the race in America by getting employees to engage with customers about the perennially hot button subject.

Beginning on Monday, Starbucks baristas will have the option as they serve customers to hand cups on which they’ve handwritten the words “Race Together” and start a discussion about race.

There you go. My coffee cup now says "Race Together" on it. The conversation has begun.

"But I told that guy my name was Ray Sellinger. Can't they spell anything right?"

looking forward to the subway 'let's talk about religion' initiative

your sandwich artist will write 'do your people really believe THAT?' on the wrapper for your footlong meatball

but soon, with cutting-edge genetic research, we will finally be able to have live chickens take bites out of themselves with three-pronged cartoon forks and then shoot a big grin at the customer before using their free wing to give a thumbs-up sign

― j., Tuesday, March 17, 2015 12:15 PM Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

picturing monty burns and his one bite of blinky the three-eyed fish, here

https://hushcomics.files.wordpress.com/2014/05/peter-davison-1.jpg

oops, sorry for the hueg

lol, Bayonne doesn't get chicken fries.

Now they're asking Gloria oracular Yes or No questions.

can't wait for chik-fil-a to strike back

http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/2/2f/Worshiping_the_golden_calf.jpg

Beginning on Monday, Dairy Queen dairistas will have the option as they serve customers to hand cups on which they’ve handwritten the words “MooLatte” and start a discussion about race.

Is it supposed to be a play on "We're in this race together"?

Thought it was an invitation to listen to Racebannon with a cool barista.

the ~ ~ ~ ~ human race ~ ~ ~ ~

Slightly off topic I guess

http://www.foodandwine.com/fwx/food/how-deep-fry-cadbury-eggs-and-revolutionize-your-easter-candy

deep-fried creme eggs look like weeping pustules

http://i.imgur.com/MWikylM.jpg

Does anybody have $10

I need to buy some gloves

For a friend

http://bigmacshop.se/

are u sure that's all u need

http://images.ttcdn.co/i/product/1000/0/144139-ad6f4eeddc29432c98ef3e3cdc4f8936.jpeg

woman on left giving a real 'yeah you like these big mac jammies you sick fuck' look

No longer an innovation, but the McDonald's near my workplace has the metal circle in this picture encased and on display like a holy relic.
http://media.independent.com/img/photos/2008/03/27/Herb_Peterson_2006_File2.jpg
http://www.nbcnews.com/id/23819808/ns/business-us_business/t/egg-mcmuffin-inventor-herb-peterson-dies/#.VRjR7_nF-5I

RIP

http://i.imgur.com/RcLeq7z.jpg

I need this two minutes ago

That's all I really want from McDonalds anyway. Now all it needs is a tiny cardboard canoe full of dipping sauces.

need a belt of fry holsters

A french fry bandolier

http://thehunt.insnw.net/app/public/system/zine_images/1588085/original/71fa893652d1a052890a9e8de9bf62b9.jpg