sounds like a Wonderful World of Disney movie
― walid foster dulles (man alive), Wednesday, 14 January 2015 22:39 (nine years ago) link
that bone broth thread gave me an idea for a sketch about "Paleo Moms" who get health benefits for themselves and their children by cutting out and eating the hearts of their enemies.
― walid foster dulles (man alive), Friday, 16 January 2015 22:51 (nine years ago) link
A commercial for maternity jeans in which a fetus sings "Is there any more room for me in those jeans?"
― walid foster dulles (man alive), Sunday, 25 January 2015 16:30 (nine years ago) link
terrible idea from my unconscious mind which somehow showed up in a dream a couple of days ago:
A sequel to Kindergarten Cop where Arnold Schwarzenegger is protecting his kindergarten class from wave after wave of school shooters. Somehow, it still remains a comedy.
― silverfish, Monday, 2 February 2015 20:25 (nine years ago) link
A cover of Henry Mancini's Pink Panther theme, but replacing the saxophone part with some one singing "Burzum" over and over again.
― how's life, Wednesday, 4 February 2015 10:24 (nine years ago) link
The traditional lyrics are:
Dead ant, dead antDead ant, dead ant, dead ant, dead ant, dead antDead ant
― Plasmon, Wednesday, 4 February 2015 13:01 (nine years ago) link
a line of artificial fruit drinks called After You Brush that taste good even right after you've brushed your teeth
a line of natural fruit drinks called 3 Hours Later... which you can enjoy after the effect of the toothpaste has worn off (a 2-pack of After You Brush and 3 Hours Later... could easily get you through the day)
an After You Brush test kit that uses a saliva sample to determine whether it's ok to drink fruit juice
an After You Brush phone app that texts you 3 hours after you've brushed your teeth to let you know that it's ok to drink fruit juice (but it isn't as accurate as the After You Brush test kit)
― i ain't marchant anymore (unregistered), Wednesday, 4 February 2015 16:30 (nine years ago) link
a line of toothpaste (secretly manufactured by a competitor of After You Brush) that doesn't affect the taste of fruit juice
― i ain't marchant anymore (unregistered), Wednesday, 4 February 2015 16:31 (nine years ago) link
you've really covered all the bases
― Ratt in Mi Kitchen (Neil S), Wednesday, 4 February 2015 16:36 (nine years ago) link
^the toothpaste would be called Even After You Brush (xpost)
― i ain't marchant anymore (unregistered), Wednesday, 4 February 2015 16:42 (nine years ago) link
a chewing gum (secretly manufactured by After You Brush) called Fresh Breath that secretly contains sodium lauryl sulfate, the same chemical that makes fruit juice taste bitter after you've brushed your teeth. the popularity of Fresh Breath causes Even After You Brush's sales to plummet as consumers of both products are convinced that the toothpaste is useless
a breath spray called Fresher Breath (secretly manufactured by Even After You Brush slogan: "spray after you chew for even fresher breath!") that counteracts the effect of sodium lauryl sulfate, whether the source is toothpaste or gum
― i ain't marchant anymore (unregistered), Wednesday, 4 February 2015 16:45 (nine years ago) link
a scathing Michael Moore documentary called Truthpaste that exposes the sodium laurel sulfate racket
― i ain't marchant anymore (unregistered), Wednesday, 4 February 2015 16:47 (nine years ago) link
(ok, now I think I've covered all the bases)
― i ain't marchant anymore (unregistered), Wednesday, 4 February 2015 16:48 (nine years ago) link
yes, I posted too soon
― Ratt in Mi Kitchen (Neil S), Wednesday, 4 February 2015 16:48 (nine years ago) link
I went to a Packers game last year at Lambeau field and there are dozens of bars around, some of which had ironic-but-not-that-ironic hair metal bands made up of people in their 30s and 40s playing in the parking lots for the drunken fans.
I think there ought to be a movie based on this somehow, with someone like Jack Black or Will Ferrell playing members of a band who end up in conflict with some young upstarts who are cashing in on the lucrative Lambeau field hair metal tailgating scene but aren't legit metal fans, with comic relief from wacky bratwurst vendors and a charter bus full of dudes like my father in law who rode down from Upper Michigan with a bunch of guys from his golf course and spent the weekend colossally wasted.
There should also be some scene where a mysterious stranger who looks like Vince Lombardi offers sage advice or a verbal ass-kicking right when our protagonist is at his lowest. But was he real, or just a figment of his imagination?
Eventually both bands team up or something to fight off a developer from CHICAGO who is secret BEARS FAN and the movie ends with scenes of them rocking out to each other's bands while drinking 16oz cans of Old Milwaukee and eating bratwurst covered with cheese curds at 10am.
― joygoat, Wednesday, 4 February 2015 17:16 (nine years ago) link
This, by the way, is one of the bands I saw play:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LbJ1PXoe0-o
― joygoat, Wednesday, 4 February 2015 17:19 (nine years ago) link
irl lol @ truthpaste
― groundless round (La Lechera), Wednesday, 4 February 2015 21:03 (nine years ago) link
Start a moving company called Juicy Brutes. The theme song is just like Juicy Fruit - "Juicy Brutes, they're gonna move ya! Juicy Brutes, they get right to ya! Juicy Brutes, they're really really really gonna mooooove ya!". I would make the moving brutes wear shorts that say "JUICY" across the butt
― "reading specialist" (Z S), Tuesday, January 1, 2013 12:36 PM Bookmark Flag Post Permalink
this pops into my head every time i consume Juicy Fruit
― Doctor Casino, Wednesday, 4 February 2015 22:14 (nine years ago) link
i forgot about that! i had better ideas when I was Z S, i'm past my prime
― Karl Malone, Wednesday, 4 February 2015 22:28 (nine years ago) link
you had better terrible ideas, true. you've had some pretty great good ideas as Karl.
― It's strange to me too. But we're talking about praxis, man. (Sufjan Grafton), Wednesday, 4 February 2015 22:32 (nine years ago) link
plus i can dunk now which is a major bonus
*reverse 360 slam*
― Karl Malone, Wednesday, 4 February 2015 22:34 (nine years ago) link
i'm afraid i've always pictured Karl Malone as this guy:
http://www.luisescobarblog.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/01/The-missing-pieces-in-an-artist-knowledge.png
― Doctor Casino, Wednesday, 4 February 2015 22:36 (nine years ago) link
Here's a terrible idea: Marl Cologne by Karl Malone
― walid foster dulles (man alive), Thursday, 5 February 2015 02:11 (nine years ago) link
Karl wears only Marl to bed
― It's strange to me too. But we're talking about praxis, man. (Sufjan Grafton), Thursday, 5 February 2015 02:15 (nine years ago) link
hi, i'm karl malone, and the only thing I wear when I go to bed is Marl. Marl Cologne by Karl Malone.
― Karl Malone, Thursday, 5 February 2015 04:02 (nine years ago) link
would buy
― difficult-difficult lemon-difficult (VegemiteGrrl), Thursday, 5 February 2015 04:10 (nine years ago) link
A credit agency based on how nice the applicant isKarma Loans
― kinder, Thursday, 5 February 2015 09:21 (nine years ago) link
Puddin' Pets
single-serve pudding in pet-shaped dispenser/container. just squeeze for a tasty stream of [your choice]-flavored pudding!
― A Severus of Snapes (contenderizer), Friday, 6 February 2015 05:39 (nine years ago) link
what, like they poo out the pudding?
― Eyeball Kicks, Friday, 6 February 2015 13:12 (nine years ago) link
I am progressive and support change and everything but the new version of the mel-o honey bear shits honey out of his asshole and that upsets me.
― Doctor Casino, Friday, 6 February 2015 14:11 (nine years ago) link
A song for the New Mexico tourism board that parodies Genesis' classic anti-Thatcher song to ask, "Can't you see this is a land of enchantment?"
― pilate is my cogod (Crabbits), Saturday, 7 February 2015 02:03 (nine years ago) link
a rap career as 'young rascal'
― Josh Whitehurst the endowed drummer and backing vocalist (imago), Tuesday, 10 February 2015 13:03 (nine years ago) link
A sign similar to what libraries do, only instead of saying "The FBI has not asked us for our records" (they remove the sign if they get a request, passively letting customers know).
The sign would say "I do not eat the booty"
― mh, Tuesday, 10 February 2015 15:36 (nine years ago) link
A Cat Cafe where you can smoke called 'Puss and Puff'
― sʌxihɔːl (Ward Fowler), Monday, 16 February 2015 10:37 (nine years ago) link
inspired by a trailer for The Wedding Ringer, a series of romantic comedies that rhyme with Wedding Singer.
Bringer, Zinger, Flinger, Pinger, Stringer, Winger, etc.
― there can be only (onimo), Monday, 16 February 2015 20:24 (nine years ago) link
The Wedding Dinger, about the whacky goings-on at the Neu! drummer's nuptials
― Keith Moom (Neil S), Monday, 16 February 2015 20:30 (nine years ago) link
i have said this before but... a thriller based in the world of campanologists called 'Dead Ringers'.
― koogs, Monday, 16 February 2015 20:31 (nine years ago) link
Sayers missed a trick http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Nine_Tailors
― Keith Moom (Neil S), Monday, 16 February 2015 20:32 (nine years ago) link
(ha, thanks. just bought a copy for a bell ringer friend...)
― koogs, Monday, 16 February 2015 22:18 (nine years ago) link
heckle a band by actually bringing a guitar and belt clip amp into the show and playing it between songs, like instead of shouting "freebird!" you could PLAY freebird
― walid foster dulles (man alive), Wednesday, 18 February 2015 04:27 (nine years ago) link
Turkish Delight: The Musical
― tangenttangent, Wednesday, 18 February 2015 19:14 (nine years ago) link
Highly "socially concerned" hip hop group called Hand Wringaz
― walid foster dulles (man alive), Thursday, 19 February 2015 14:12 (nine years ago) link
Pearl Clutchaz
― I, (dog latin), Thursday, 19 February 2015 14:16 (nine years ago) link
Dnah Zagnirw
(insert Europa League joke here)
― bojaxhiu mother derive (imago), Thursday, 19 February 2015 14:23 (nine years ago) link
vinylbox is a big box where you can rent vinyl records. instead of gas stations, grocery stores, and wal-marts, vinylbox will be located at cafes, head shops, and breweries. smaller versions located in burger joints and soda shoppes will let you 'rent' 78s immediately by playing the record for you through the location's sound system.
― you can buy your hair if it won't grow (Sufjan Grafton), Friday, 20 February 2015 05:48 (nine years ago) link
Reminiscent of this:
http://www.wonderingsound.com/vnyl-netflix-vinyl-subscription-service-albums/
which is also a terrible idea.
― I, (dog latin), Friday, 20 February 2015 12:31 (nine years ago) link
http://www.internetofuselessthings.io/
― the plight of y0landa (forksclovetofu), Friday, 27 February 2015 03:43 (nine years ago) link
http://www.internetofuselessthings.io/dist/img/idea-thronemaster.jpg
I was friends with a bunch of dudes in high school, who insisted we all keep averages of how long we peed. They all thought it was funny that my average was so low (I was the only woman in the group.) My nickname was "eighteen seconds." I look back and think: what a bunch of assholes. Anyway, this would've saved us all some effort.
― pilate is my cogod (Crabbits), Friday, 27 February 2015 18:37 (nine years ago) link
they were just jealous of your healthy prostate.
― pplains, Friday, 27 February 2015 18:50 (nine years ago) link
Wacky, League of Extraordinary Gentlemen-like IP wherein a famous Baroque composer is revived by desperate CIA men during the Cold War, and we follow his adventures behind the Iron Curtain: Bach in the USSR
― Doctor Casino, Saturday, 28 February 2015 17:33 (nine years ago) link