I TROLLED JOSE CANSECO

cansecomet!!

http://www.sbnation.com/lookit/2015/1/2/7480343/jose-canseco-predictions-2015-cansecodamus

Jose Canseco ✔ @JoseCanseco
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2. @JebYork chokes on silver spoon, Lott new owner, hires Jimbo, 49ers win super bowl.

Problem: "Jeb" York isn't the CEO of the 49ers. That would be Jed York. This is impressive because "Jeb York" is a mock Twitter account created solely after Canseco insisted the 49ers' CEO was named Jeb.

priceless

remember the UFO/balloon guy? the one who faked his kid flying off in a homemade hot air balloon/ufo thingy...
Canseco and him are basically the same person now.

Jose Canseco @JoseCanseco · 15m 15 minutes ago
Your caught on video return my stereo equipment that you ripped out of my suv yesterday or else.yes this is a threat

Jose Canseco @JoseCanseco · 13m 13 minutes ago
You have 24 hours plus leave 1k for the damage done to my suv..or else this is you only warning

Jose Canseco @JoseCanseco · 13m 13 minutes ago
I will come get you my self

icymi

http://stompersbaseball.com/stompers-present-jose-canseco-weekend-june-12-13/

can g4wker send J0rdan on assignment for this?

said Stompers VP and general manager Theo Fightmaster

this is gonna make great effectively wild material

did B&S jointly cook this up i wonder

josejosejosejose

http://gfycat.com/NervousAdmiredCarp

https://pbs.twimg.com/media/CKcl0McUwAEk3Bb.jpg

could that be the true manifestation of evil guide dog from that bizarro (and fascinating) thread you made ages ago that was recently bumped

i don't know, looks more like crazy eye dog to me

imagine waking up from a nap with that dog staring at you!

or even the canine.

a linear combination of those faces made michael shannon

@JoseCanseco 2h2 hours ago
Congrats to Junior the 3rd teammate off my Springfield Nuclear Power Plant team to make the Baseball Hall of Fame! hug for Mike Piazza too

@JoseCanseco 59m59 minutes ago
If I were a vampire I could play independent baseball for ever

there is little better than jose canseco using the subjunctive

I'd forgotten that Wade Boggs was in the HOF!

you forgot he had 3010 hits?

Yes.

200 hits a season for like a million seasons in a row

wade boggs was probably had the best first 10 years of any third baseman in history

maybe schmitty or mathews gives him a run there but yeah, he's a deserving HOFer

he's 28th all-time by fWAR, 4th among 3B

led the majors in BA and OBP for 5 of his first 7 years, including 4 straight, dude was a machine

I had to remove this thread from my bookmarks because the title was getting the Cranberries stuck in my head ;_;

http://i.imgur.com/WgVCFpV.png

ONE OF US

i followed him based on this thread. i can't stop laughing but mainly everyone i know who likes sport finds this hilarious cos he was so famous that he was in a simpsons episode.

‏@JoseCanseco Oct 1
Democracies are such a fragile thing and seem to age and deteriorate never being as good as they once were . Never reversing march to death

deep!

In 2018 blockchain will become mainstream knowledge understood by moron level and above

— Jose Canseco (@JoseCanseco) November 22, 2017

lol

when you were having premarital sex, jose cans

Canseco Rule- once tweeted or discussed in media by Jose Canseco then the concept has become 'mainstream knowledge'.

I cannot believe David Ortiz aka Big Papi did not invite me to play in his golf tournament this weekend I'm one of the longest drivers in the world at 50 and over and one of the best golfers I could have helped him out with his charity does MLB still hold grudges against me

— Jose Canseco (@JoseCanseco) November 29, 2017

how will David Ortiz aka Big Papi respond

solid take

What is going on with all these politicians molesting women I've been molested by several women and never complained

— Jose Canseco (@JoseCanseco) December 12, 2017

Hey little buddy @realDonaldTrump I am interested in United Nations leadership .dm me for ideas and confidential 90 day plan #readynow

— Jose Canseco (@JoseCanseco) October 9, 2018

Aliens have been trying to teach us how to time travel but first we have to change our body composition which we are not willing to do we have tried with animals and it has failed

— Jose Canseco (@JoseCanseco) January 30, 2019

Cloning is illegal that's why we cannot evolve into our next stage

— Jose Canseco (@JoseCanseco) February 7, 2019

Once cloning is legal we will be able to purchase either bodies of ourselves in our Prime and once our shells get to old detach the brain and then apply to a new shell ot body..

— Jose Canseco (@JoseCanseco) February 7, 2019

In 50 years from now only the rich will be able to purchase a new body

— Jose Canseco (@JoseCanseco) February 7, 2019

New bodies will come with optional Android or robotic moving parts

— Jose Canseco (@JoseCanseco) February 7, 2019

I have figured out a way to live an extra 30 years

— Jose Canseco (@JoseCanseco) February 7, 2019

One of many ways to live an extra 30 years is that you have to sleep in almost freezing temperatures

— Jose Canseco (@JoseCanseco) February 7, 2019

Another way to live 30 years longer if you must have sex at least 3 times a week

— Jose Canseco (@JoseCanseco) February 7, 2019

people who have figured out have to live an extra 30 years

he has the exact same energy as @Love_That_Goku

i have an encyclopedic knowledge of Dragonball canon and all you ask me is "does Krillin like anal" "does android 18 have a pussy" etc

— love_that_goku (@Love_that_Goku) September 24, 2016

all signs point to Android 18 having a functional reproductive system but once again this is not my business

— love_that_goku (@Love_that_Goku) September 24, 2016

NO Piccolo does not smoke weed

— love_that_goku (@Love_that_Goku) September 24, 2016

the way some of you people speak to me is disgusting. "hey Christian does piccolo smoke weed" "does Roshi fuck the turtle". just unreal

— love_that_goku (@Love_that_Goku) September 24, 2016

everybody knows there are many ways to live 30 years longer, but here's a tricky constraint: I must have sex at least 3 times a week.

Watching World of Dance watching J.Lo text Alex Rodriguez little does she know that he is cheating on her with my ex-wife Jessica poor girl she has no idea who he really is

— Jose Canseco (@JoseCanseco) March 11, 2019

Alex Rodriguez stop being a piece of shit stop cheating on Jennifer Lopez

— Jose Canseco (@JoseCanseco) March 11, 2019