I TROLLED JOSE CANSECO

http://deadspin.com/jose-cansecos-interstellar-trade-idea-will-probably-sav-1658468406

Jose Canseco @JoseCanseco
Galactic Beings have used comets as star taxis for eons
1:39 PM - 13 Nov 2014

Jose Canseco @JoseCanseco
Comet Transport is the key to our survival.
1:38 PM - 13 Nov 2014

never. ever. ever. change.

ya - this is quite sweet after Schilling yesterday.

you didn't even include the part that made me laugh really hard

Jose Canseco✔ @JoseCanseco
If Earth can control the comet transport system we will run the Milkyway. Think about that

Jose Canseco✔ @JoseCanseco
hug for u NASA #cansecomet

i fuckin hate my last dn, but i think jose jsut gave me a new one

who wants to be my bash bro and change theirs to "hug for u NASA #cansecomet"

so the "smelly" finger he shot fell off while he was playing poker!

best comment: "at least you didn't lose the hand"

p sure jose canseco is the star-child

When Jose Canseco says all-in he means it

snitches get stitches lose fingers

cansecomet!!

http://www.sbnation.com/lookit/2015/1/2/7480343/jose-canseco-predictions-2015-cansecodamus

Jose Canseco ✔ @JoseCanseco
Follow
2. @JebYork chokes on silver spoon, Lott new owner, hires Jimbo, 49ers win super bowl.

Problem: "Jeb" York isn't the CEO of the 49ers. That would be Jed York. This is impressive because "Jeb York" is a mock Twitter account created solely after Canseco insisted the 49ers' CEO was named Jeb.

priceless

remember the UFO/balloon guy? the one who faked his kid flying off in a homemade hot air balloon/ufo thingy...
Canseco and him are basically the same person now.

Jose Canseco @JoseCanseco · 15m 15 minutes ago
Your caught on video return my stereo equipment that you ripped out of my suv yesterday or else.yes this is a threat

Jose Canseco @JoseCanseco · 13m 13 minutes ago
You have 24 hours plus leave 1k for the damage done to my suv..or else this is you only warning

Jose Canseco @JoseCanseco · 13m 13 minutes ago
I will come get you my self

icymi

http://stompersbaseball.com/stompers-present-jose-canseco-weekend-june-12-13/

can g4wker send J0rdan on assignment for this?

said Stompers VP and general manager Theo Fightmaster

this is gonna make great effectively wild material

did B&S jointly cook this up i wonder

josejosejosejose

http://gfycat.com/NervousAdmiredCarp

https://pbs.twimg.com/media/CKcl0McUwAEk3Bb.jpg

could that be the true manifestation of evil guide dog from that bizarro (and fascinating) thread you made ages ago that was recently bumped

i don't know, looks more like crazy eye dog to me

imagine waking up from a nap with that dog staring at you!

or even the canine.

a linear combination of those faces made michael shannon

@JoseCanseco 2h2 hours ago
Congrats to Junior the 3rd teammate off my Springfield Nuclear Power Plant team to make the Baseball Hall of Fame! hug for Mike Piazza too

@JoseCanseco 59m59 minutes ago
If I were a vampire I could play independent baseball for ever

there is little better than jose canseco using the subjunctive

I'd forgotten that Wade Boggs was in the HOF!

you forgot he had 3010 hits?

Yes.

200 hits a season for like a million seasons in a row

wade boggs was probably had the best first 10 years of any third baseman in history

maybe schmitty or mathews gives him a run there but yeah, he's a deserving HOFer

he's 28th all-time by fWAR, 4th among 3B

led the majors in BA and OBP for 5 of his first 7 years, including 4 straight, dude was a machine

I had to remove this thread from my bookmarks because the title was getting the Cranberries stuck in my head ;_;

http://i.imgur.com/WgVCFpV.png

ONE OF US

i followed him based on this thread. i can't stop laughing but mainly everyone i know who likes sport finds this hilarious cos he was so famous that he was in a simpsons episode.

‏@JoseCanseco Oct 1
Democracies are such a fragile thing and seem to age and deteriorate never being as good as they once were . Never reversing march to death

deep!

In 2018 blockchain will become mainstream knowledge understood by moron level and above

— Jose Canseco (@JoseCanseco) November 22, 2017

lol

when you were having premarital sex, jose cans

Canseco Rule- once tweeted or discussed in media by Jose Canseco then the concept has become 'mainstream knowledge'.

I cannot believe David Ortiz aka Big Papi did not invite me to play in his golf tournament this weekend I'm one of the longest drivers in the world at 50 and over and one of the best golfers I could have helped him out with his charity does MLB still hold grudges against me

— Jose Canseco (@JoseCanseco) November 29, 2017

how will David Ortiz aka Big Papi respond

solid take

What is going on with all these politicians molesting women I've been molested by several women and never complained

— Jose Canseco (@JoseCanseco) December 12, 2017

Hey little buddy @realDonaldTrump I am interested in United Nations leadership .dm me for ideas and confidential 90 day plan #readynow

— Jose Canseco (@JoseCanseco) October 9, 2018

Aliens have been trying to teach us how to time travel but first we have to change our body composition which we are not willing to do we have tried with animals and it has failed

— Jose Canseco (@JoseCanseco) January 30, 2019

Cloning is illegal that's why we cannot evolve into our next stage

— Jose Canseco (@JoseCanseco) February 7, 2019