Let's bitch about our stupid, annoying co-workers

What is it with US elitism today?

My mum recently, after 55 years of solid anti-sport-ness, decided to deliberately and dedicatedly get into AFL so she could "talk to my fellow Australians like a normal person". I tried to persuade her, but she has gone ahead. Now she asks for score updates on Saturday afternoons, all that sort of thing, as though she actually cared. It's quite disturbing.

tried to DISSUADE her. Balls!

Yeah this whole "talk about footy like its the language of everyone" thing bugs me. I wish I could talk about bands the same way but no one cares less. Bleh.

That said my workmates at this job are all quite nice, and Ive nothing to bitch about here really. Apart from footballs to the groin chest.

OH GOD HES PLAYING THAT DAMN SONG FROM "MUSIC AND LYRICS" AGAIN HE SINGS IT EVERY SINGLE DAY I WILL KILL HIM.

People who take the elevator to go up or down ONE floor....

TAKE THE FUCKING STAIRS! the average person that does it resembles Jerome Bettis too, so you'd think they could use it.

me: *reads ILX for an hour*
little person: "are you cleaning up the computer?" [note: this is her term for defragging]
me: "yes"
little person: "i thought so with all that gibberish on the screen"

― roxymuzak (roxymuzak), Thursday, September 8, 2005 9:56 AM (3 years ago) Bookmark Suggest Ban Permalink

haw, i forgot this

Dude just will NOT shut up with his analyses of the stock market yesterday and today. Don't you have SOMETHING to do besides visit neighbors and snort at yr own awful jokes buddy?

Woman across from me has been doing her own real-time DOW updates--"down 500," "oooh now it's up 300"--i don't give a fuck and could look myself if i did

I'm getting the Dow updates from this schmuck too.

Yesterday afternoon he was shouting out Dow numbers every 5 - 10 minutes.

I get that too.

Of course, I work for a business publication, so I guess it kinda comes with the territory.

What's that kind of pseudo-laughter where you just breathe rapidly and noisily thru yr teeth called? I am so sick of hearing that.

John McCain Extended Death Rattle?

I think I remember Shaggy sometimes laughing like this on Scooby-Doo.

Or maybe Scooby.

He only Scooby-laughs at his own jokes too, the jokes that NOBODY else is even smiling at. It's more like his way of letting everyone within earshot that he thinks he's being clever.

Muttley Snickers

so I'm in a brand new office, with a new set of strange new co-workers.

from what I've overheard this morning it seems like an absolute goldmine for posts to this thread.

Start NOW!

My coworker at the next desk was very loudly pretending to be the Brownlow Medal points announcer, earlier, for no particular reason. If you know anything about the Brownlow Medal count you'll know how fscking annoying that is.

Chris Matthews looks like he hasn't slept in a couple of days.

lol, whoops wrong thread

haha Rock Hardy works at MSNBC
OUTED

lol

HAHA

http://www.lepconnie.com/pics/willow/starburst89g.jpg

Department merger bringing in a whole new batch of annoying. Lady goes about calling herself an “excel person” trying to school me how to performing a data sort! I didn’t ask you a damn thing so STFU! I know perfectly well what I’m doing. WHO THE FUCK IS YOU! YOURE OLD!

oh Wow. just now

"what's the plural for confused, is it confuseder?"

omg who walks into the toilets and stands at a urinal eating crisps?

Haha, best email I've ever received, from our company president no less:

I just walked into the men's restroom and found the most disgusting mess I've ever seen. Toilet. Clogged. No water. Lots of...you know.

I probably saw worse a few times in a junior high school bathroom but that's it.

Everyone is expected to handle their own messes. There's a plunger conveniently located next to the toilet. Flush frequently when you have major intestinal issues that you can't deal with at home because your wife or mom or girlfriend won't clean up after you. I'm sorry the corporate toilet doesn't have sufficient capacity -- maybe in a new office someday.

And while I'm at it, it wouldn't hurt for some of us to stand closer to the urinal.

Asinine colleague calling out DOW numbers again yesterday, this time with "ouch"s and whistles. Get to work you turd.

can't deal with at home because your wife or mom or girlfriend won't clean up after you

lol

dudes who tell you something, and you say OK no problem, I understand, and then they tell you again, and you say OK, I got you, I'll deal with that, and then they tell you again and don't get when to stop talking and go away.

dude who is like 'oh, did you see this tv show/movie, this is the kind of show someone like you would like' or 'I didn't think someone like you would like the NFL' etc. and is basically constantly telling you what kind of person they think you are. mind your own business, I don't even want to talk to you.

* Co-worker who sighs and mutters under her breath and I never know if she's talking to me or not. "Oh, I hate having to upload this..... right?"

* Co-worker who reads aloud Onion articles to everyone.

* Co-worker who has been battling AT&T and has seemingly yelled at every operator (and their supervisor.)

Can I mention a customer instead? I work at a church bookstore. A family came in and when one of the parents asked if they wanted to take a few minutes to look around, one of the teenagers said "Naw, it's all Christian stuff."

I would've said the same...

Ha PP you'd probably hate working with me, I have a dreadful tendency to mutter to myself when I work :/

Stop running everywhere in the office! Especially when you're wearing high heel boots and carrying heavy boxes. Are you some sort of thicko?

Too much cologne! I even complained to him about it!

yes, i've moved desks. we've all moved desks, remember?

so "is this your new desk, then?" is a particularly asinine comment.

Ugh I hate pointless small talk like that. One of the girls I work with, she's a lovely lass, but she has to ask everyone what they are eating at lunch while they are eating it. "whats in it? did you make it?" etc.

That particular woman GF is talking about could fill a whole thread by herself. My latest favourite:

[After filing a story about Lewis Hamilton winning]
"... so, this Massa, his first name's really Ferrari then?"
"No, it's Felipe. Did you mean Ferarri's Felipe Massa?"
"Oh, does he drive a Ferrari car then?"
"... er, on the track, yes"
"oh."

Thing was, this was all perfect in the story.

Haha! Oh dear.

Seriously, she is ... well, as I suggested to a colleague the other day who had stopped by my desk purely to rant about the woman in question, if she turns out to be some reality-TV-style plant, designed to make us snap and hurl ourselves (or her) out of the window, I won't be too surprised.

Argh stupid fucking network admins keep rebooting extremely important server without telling anyone :(

What do you do when you work in a small, public place and a co-worker may have a crush on you and stares at you and wants to talk to you all the time, even though you in no way reciprocate the attentions? When I catch him staring at me I either look up and glare at which point he smiles, or studiously ignore him, at which point he continues looking. When I walk around I feel his eyes on me and it makes me uncomfortable. When he tried to talk to me I basically nod give monosyllabic non replies, but he somehow thinks that we are friends. There are many other ladies at my POV, and I don't notice him fixing on them in the same way. He also used to want to leave work together every day, but I put the kibosh on that.

you probably have no choice but to scar yourself in the most horrific manner possible.
as a bonus you'll get a few days off too!

serious answer: talk to your friggin boss already.

pick the biggest dude in the office and start dating him