Misdirected emails

lol

I don't think Saks sells the kind of brownies that a "chemo friend" would want anyway.

Hi Honey,

please send me the house information, and please pass my email information on to the realtor.




Thanks,

Hello Jordan,

We are helping to cast a new screen adaptation of Lady Chatterley's Lover which will air on BBC1 in 2015.

The novel is an early-20th-century tale of love across class boundaries, telling the legendary and romantic story of Lady Chatterley’s affair with her gamekeeper. With its original 1928 edition censored in Britain for over 30 years after it was written, Lady Chatterley’s Lover is one of the most sexually pioneering novels of the 20th century.

The drama will star Holliday Grainger (Tulip Fever, The Riot Club), Richard Madden (Birdsong, Game Of Thrones) and James Norton (Happy Valley, Death Comes To Pemberley) and is adapted by the acclaimed Jed Mercurio and will be produced by the same production company (Hartswood films) that produce Sherlock.

We are looking for artists to play Footmen or Gardeners.

Thank you for ordering from Mobile Waiters!

From Joey D's Oak Room:
$9.95 Oak Room Chicken Sandwich
$0.00 Cole Slaw
$0.00 Add Barbeque
$9.95 Oak Room Chicken Sandwich
$0.00 Fries
$0.00 Add ketchup
$9.95 Oak Room Chicken Sandwich
$0.00 Cole Slaw
$0.00 Add Barbeque

$-2.99 Discount: Coupon
$1.88 Tax
$4.99 Delivery
$4.00 tip
$37.73 Total

Thank you. If any of your information has changed. Please be available to contact

Current Approximate Delivery Time: 7:42 PM

Please note that your total may be slightly different if any special requests you made cost extra.

Thanks,
Mobile Waiters

marinated chicken breast topped with jack cheese, bacon, lettuce, tomato and honey mustard on toasted french bread. served with fries or cole slaw

That's 2-1 in devil's condiment's favor

ngl i'd be pissed if i were always being reminded that other people are enjoying a nice chicken sandwich and i'm not.

It is so easy to make a chicken sandwich at home. That's $40 they'll never get back.

honey mustard is so gross

I think I agree. Spicy mustards are where it's at.

Naand Jenene,
Weet nie of ek by die regte persoon is nie , het jy laas week die vroeg oggend oordenking op RSG waargeneem
kon nie lekker jou adres hoor nie.
Groete,Andre

ooh, breakup email:

Hi Dennis,

I'm just getting ready for bed and wanted to let you know I don't think that I'm the right person for you. I've enjoyed meeting you and learning about you. I hope you will find someone that is just right for you. I had asked you if you were still looking and it does appear that you are, which is fine, it just doesn't work for me. I wish you the best of luck.

Take care,
Cindy

eek

Thank you for ordering from Mobile Waiters!

From Joey D's Oak Room:
$11.95 Chicken BBQ Sandwich
$0.00 No bun, sub with pickle
$9.95 Oak Room Chicken Sandwich
$0.00 Cole Slaw
$0.00 Add Barbeque
$3.75 Fettuccini Marinara
$0.00 No Marinara Sauce

$1.80 Tax
$4.99 Delivery
$-3.00 Coupon
$29.44 Total

Thank you. If any of your information has changed. Please be available to contact

Current Approximate Delivery Time: 2:24 PM

Please note that your total may be slightly different if any special requests you made cost extra.

Thanks,
Mobile Waiters

dude, diversify a little.

$3.75 Fettuccini Marinara
$0.00 No Marinara Sauce

:|

sounds like a baby methinks

wait a chicken BBQ sandwich with pickles substitued for the bun? am I parsing this correctly

I think he's just getting it as a BBQ plate.

Thank you for ordering from Mobile Waiters!

From Maggiano's Perimeter:
$12.95 Fettuccini Alfredo
$0.00 Gluten Free
$4.95 Spaghetti Marinara
$0.00 Butter sauce. No marinara.
$16.75 Chicken Parmesan
$0.00 Gluten free

$2.43 Tax
$4.99 Delivery
$-2.00 Coupon
$40.07 Total

Thank you. If any of your information has changed. Please be available to contact

Current Approximate Delivery Time: 2:01 PM

Please note that your total may be slightly different if any special requests you made cost extra.

Thanks,
Mobile Waiters

$2 coupon, nice one not-caek

Why in shit would you pay $5 for a plate of plain pasta!? You could cook that yrself and $5 would buy two packets of the stuff and last all week.

Obviously, Pseudocaek is a lone psychopath, holed up in a motel room with a company credit card.

Much like the real caek, I might add.

people complaining about buying pasta is a pet peeve

Im not talking about a pasta dish. Why anyone would buy a serve of plain boiled pasta with nothing on it is what gets me. Whats the freaking point, unless I dunno you're staying in yr car or some weird room with no kitchen.

He did get butter sauce on it.

Which is fucking revolting, I might add, but it wasn't plain.

It might be for a kid, but given the number of times this person orders plain pasta for quadruple the cost of an entire box of pasta you can make in ten minutes at home, it just doesn't make any sense.

Maybe:

• He's on the road.

• He's disabled.

• He doesn't know how to cook spaghetti to make it as soft and refined as Joey D.

• He's lazy.

• He has money to burn.

• He has someone else's money to burn.

Who knows? Good thing he didn't order a coke for $1.29, or we'd be all over him for not getting a 20-pack at Skaggs for $8.

maybe he makes over $30/hour in which case preparing the spaghetti may literally not be worth his time

I bet I could make a chicken sandwich at home for less than $12.

so i keep getting things for the dude who was supposed to receive that breakup letter, and one of them had his phone number on it. so i called it, and he actually answered.

he claims he signed up for my exact gmail address (no dots or anything) two years ago and got it. says he hasn't received any of my stuff and seemed genuinely concerned that i was getting some of his. either gmail has some weird bug with their validation or he actually has a different address but forgets what it is when he gives it to stewardesses (as i learned the above lady is).

i asked him to send me a screenshot of the top of his inbox to verify, or to send something to my email and see who gets it, but he hasn't responded (hopefully because he realized his mistake and feels dumb).

gmail ignores dots in the address, anyway, so it wouldn't matter

if my adventures in misdirected email have taught me anything, it is that people have no idea what their own email address is

^

My boss snagged the handle @LT when Twitter first debuted. Now he gets tagged for everything from LaDainian Tomlinson to most recently, "LMAO “@Lipstickthug: Nigga u sure bout that “@ClydesRevenge: @LT I wouldn't fuck you if my life depended on it”

i really want to read fake-caek's yelp reviews of these places. "the best honey mustard in town! minus a star for never emailing me a receipt like they say they will."

fake-caek is certainly no gastrophysicist

applause

Thank you for ordering from Mobile Waiters!

From Joey D's Oak Room:
$9.95 Oak Room Chicken Sandwich
$0.00 Fries
$0.00 Barbeque on the side
$11.95 Chicken BBQ Sandwich
$0.00 No bun sub with pickle
$9.95 Oak Room Chicken Sandwich
$0.00 Cole Slaw
$0.00 Barbeque and Ketchup on the side

$-3.19 Discount: Coupon
$2.01 Tax
$4.99 Delivery
$35.66 Total

Thank you. If any of your information has changed. Please be available to contact

Current Approximate Delivery Time: 8:45 PM

Please note that your total may be slightly different if any special requests you made cost extra.

Thanks,
Mobile Waiters

this is racist

Found a dude named caek who lives in the right-hand corner:

http://i.imgur.com/UGDDylP.png

But there are tons of caek in what I now call "Caeklanta," so who knows.

Hi ljubljana,

I tried to call and confirm your appointment for A1d3n for Monday Oct 20 at 9:30am. I couldn't get through on your phone.

Please send a quick reply to this email to confirm.

See you Monday,
Jacqui

Thank you for ordering from Mobile Waiters!

From Joey D's Oak Room:
$3.75 Fettuccini Marinara
$0.00 Butter sauce only. No marinara.
$9.95 Oak Room Chicken Sandwich
$0.00 Cole Slaw
$0.00 Add barbecue
$9.95 Oak Room Chicken Sandwich
$0.00 Fries
$0.00 Add ketchup

$-2.36 Discount: Coupon
$1.49 Tax
$4.99 Delivery
$3.55 tip
$31.32 Total

Thank you. If any of your information has changed. Please be available to contact

Current Approximate Delivery Time: 7:24 PM

Please note that your total may be slightly different if any special requests you made cost extra.

Thanks,
Mobile Waiters

Damn, man. Eat something else now and then.

I created a jackd account to talk to someone til I get u back I'm sorry baby I just can't deal with the pain......

love this thread

aw

HEY GRANDMA! <3

If you don't know. This is Mikayla! I'm sorry I have not wrote to you in a long time. I just don't like to be on my phone much anymore! I've been doing good! I've been going to Zumba class (that's a dance workout class) and running around in the woods! Just trying to keep active because I know winter is right around the corner! I really dislike winter. I've also picked up drawing! I'll have to show you some of my work! And speaking of work I feel like I've been doing a lot of that at the nursing home! It's not such a bad job.. It's just that the people that work there can be real hot headed!!!! Like this girl that's in dietary with me. She's been giving me trouble! Everyone tells me it's just her personality but I knew her for a while and before she was never mean towereds me until we stopped hanging out! But I think it's blowing over so I'm not as worried about it as before!!! I kind of feel like lately I've really been discovering myself! And I kind of like it! I'm happier now then I have ever been befor! (Probably because I'm out of school!) but I'm thinking of some big changes soon!
Besides that how have you been doing? I really miss you!!! :(
After winter is over I'm thinking about a road trip to come visit you! ;)
So message me back! And I'll see if I can get my drawings sent so you can see :) the other pictures are just from the woods and stuff.(like post cards)
I LOVE YOU SO MUCH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

~love Mikayla

Awwww I would write back to that one and tell her she had the wrong address because I bet it's going to make her grandma super happy to get that email.

oh i totally did, i always tell them it's a wrong address if it's a legit & sincere message.

<3 You are a legit and sincere dude.