Just when you thought it was safe - OK CUPID PART 3: The Return of the WOO!

You could be right, but I think it's simpler: most of the stuff people that "youngins" seem to do involves drinking due to lack of imagination

Also: people in their 30s, 40s, and older.

I admit I'll give pause to non drinker - but I'm not judging them. I assume they're gonna judge me! :/

^that

imo you should have a witty explanation/reference to your sobriety in one of your essays to put ppl at ease

"nope, i don't drink. i'll buy you one though." or something

yeah that'd work nicely

xpost: smooth!

I've gone on dates with a couple OKC folks who were in the "not at all" drinking category, and I admit I usually want to know why before I proceed but it will not ward me off! If they are on the wagon and therefore cannot be around drinkers or hang out in bars, that is kind of problematic for compatibility with my lifestyle because I am a sometimes lush. The biggest stumbling block is how I would introduce them to my OKC-skeptical friends, who also all drink.

friend percentage is also history

It's still there on the app.

I've noticed that a lot of people in my area show up in the app but not on the website proper, especially people who show up as high matches for friendship. I'm not sure why it is but it makes me feel like there is some funny business going on.

I'd much rather date a non-drinker than a drinker. I drink maybe 3-4 drinks a month.

Date last night was by far the most promising since moving here. Jury was out on chemistry but potential was there and conversation was fun and relaxed. He explained early on that he'd fairly recently gone from 12-hour work days to a normal working day, and talked about the fun stuff he was doing. Then he asked whether I had any hobbies, and I said no, and this was clearly a deal-breaker for him! He couldn't believe I don't play a musical instrument, regularly hike, play sport, paint, or whatever. I lamely tried to point out that I am happy to do lots of different things from time to time. Then he asked whether I had weekends off. I said not exactly (what grad student has 'weekends off'?!) and he asked point blank 'do you have time to date?' I blurbled something about fitting it in when it happens. Things went downhill from there.

hobbies, who has hobbies

I think he also thought I didn't ask enough questions re his percussive guitar playing. Nothing against it! But no questions.

ilxing is a perfectly respectable hobby imo.

only mooks with an eye on padding out a cv or university applications have hobbies, don't worry about it.

i like the sound of you more than the sound of him.

do they have hobby lobby where you are, might be a good place for date #2

you can do some gluing, other hobby things

I lamely tried to point out that I am happy to do lots of different things from time to time.

Sounds v reasonable - I think you said you went to the odd chamber opera so you can drag someone that would be up for that and understands your other commitments.

re: drinking. Meet quite a few who don't, mostly because they are health concious (v much into yoga). Completely fine - people shouldn't do what they don't have to.

ahem

I think people who actually use the phrase "do you have any hobbies?" are generally horrible.

Can't people just ask others what they like or like to do?

I think I mentioned it on ilx but a friend went on a date and one of the first thing he was asked is the hobby question and he very nearly just peaced out of there

ok cupid is my hobby duh

boy i love the weirdness of this thread

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=a1xjcyyuDM0

lol gr80

*pulls 1/48 scale messerschmitt from purse*

I think he also thought I didn't ask enough questions re his percussive guitar playing. Nothing against it! But no questions.

― ljubljana, Thursday, March 20, 2014

find me a man who is like "ask me about my percussive guitar playing" and i will find a you a bullet dodged

My eyebrows shot up when he asked about hobbies, and I started laughing at "Do you even have time to date??" DO YOU EVEN LIFT BRO?

Well, I just realized I don't have time to date you, clearly.

The date question is overbearing. The hobby question is fine. Hobbies are great.

I think this guy was basically trying to figure out if you were some kind of crazy workaholic, and doing it in the most stupid, obnoxious way possible

Yeah, his reaction to the hobby question's answer isn't sympathetic. It should be clear that ljub does enjoy a broad range of 'culture shit' and can aptly participate in his own discourses

ha i kind of like that guy. he asked, and you both figured something out pretty quickly.

the hell is 'percussive guitar playing' tho

Hobbies: Turning dreams into...reality

xp:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dMONzLf8VvA

first thing I think of

first thing I think of is Newton Faulkner, should probably stab the part of my brain that makes that connection.

oh, I see he goes on to use actual percussion instruments in this one. just the slappy stuff at the beginning, is what I'm talking about.

ha i kind of like that guy. he asked, and you both figured something out pretty quickly.

yeah devils advocate here, it really is a bummer when you meet someone you like a whole lot and really would like to date but their schedule only allows seeing you once or twice a month, maybe he's been down that road too many times and has learned to spot it early now

just asking "do you even have time to date?" is a kind of terrible way of addressing it but its a valid concern imo

find me a man who is like "ask me about my percussive guitar playing" and i will find a you a bullet dodged

^otm tho

board description vote+

"I am happy to give up half of my hobbies for tlc"

keller williams, newton faulkner. thanks for the tips, guys.

really.

http://www.theatlantic.com/health/archive/2014/03/the-problem-of-trespassing-on-niche-dating-sites/283988/

ha i kind of like that guy. he asked, and you both figured something out pretty quickly.

Yeah, if he'd done it slightly differently it would have been ok! I mean, of course I'd take more time off if I was dating somebody, but I'm rarely going to be able to stop work for the entire weekend, so if that's a problem...

find me a man who is like "ask me about my percussive guitar playing" and i will find a you a bullet dodged

I tried not to think this thought, but I'll admit I failed.

That's a dude that's going to buy a Chapman stick one day.

Hey cmon dont diss the stick.
http://www.stickcenter.com/Interview/Levin/levinstickx.jpg

^^^ Is that Moley?

haha!

Has anyone here used Hinge? It's like Tinder but there has more Facebook connections. It seems more "serious" than Tinder. I met someone through there last week and it went super well!

Ugh, "there has" sorry about that.