List: Great songs tarnished by shit lyrics

for a band that made good music, Ride's lyrics were pretty lame - and didn't even flow very well.

She knew she could fly like a bird
But when she said 'please raise the roof higher' nobody heard
They never noticed a word
The light bulbs burn, her fingers will learn

"Killer" by Van Der Graaf Generator. Juicy metal riff spoiled inevitably by crap lines like "Fishes can't fly, fishes can't fly, and neither can I!"

"Let Us Now Make Love" by Genesis (among many possible candidates from same). Terrific music coupled with very unworthy lyrics ("Please/I beg you hear this humble voice/Please/My emerald goddess wash away the wound...")-- ultra-foppish, even for early Peter Gabriel.

"Jesus Christ Superstar" ("Buddha was he where it's at/Is he who you are?/Could Mohammed move a mountain/ Or was that just P.R.?")

"THONG THA THONG THONG THONG"

and the Geto Boys - even Scarface - but Willie Dee was the worst. This one was always a head-scratcher:

"and if you don't like it, spouse / you can suck my dick until your lips fall off"

they were famous for rhyming second lines with nonsensical first lines - so after that first line, you're thinking "ooookay, he's going somewhere good...'burn down your house?' 'snap on you like a mouse?' Nope!

Go to English class.

Subway, she is a porno

Baby, can’t you see
I’m calling
A guy like you
Should wear a warning
It’s dangerous
I’m fallin’

There’s no escape
I can’t wait
I need a hit
Baby, give me it
You’re dangerous
I’m lovin’ it

Too high
Can’t come down
Losing my head
Spinning ‘round and ‘round
Do you feel me now

With a taste of your lips
I’m on a ride
You're toxic I'm slipping under
With a taste of a poison paradise
I’m addicted to you
Don’t you know that you’re toxic
And I love what you do
Don’t you know that you’re toxic

It’s getting late
To give you up
I took a sip
From my devil's cup
Slowly
It’s taking over me

Too high
Can’t come down
It’s in the air
And it’s all around
Can you feel me now

With a taste of your lips
I’m on a ride
You're toxic I'm slipping under
With a taste of a poison paradise
I’m addicted to you
Don’t you know that you’re toxic
And I love what you do
Don’t you know that you’re toxic

Don't you know that you're toxic

[x2]
With a taste of your lips
I'm on a ride
You're toxic I'm slipping under
With a taste of a poison paradise
I'm addicted to you
Don't you know that you're toxic

Intoxicate me now
With your lovin' now
I think I'm ready now
I think I'm ready now
Intoxicate me now
With your lovin' now
I think I'm ready now

That badass G-Side song became less badass to me when I realized they were saying "ROLL TIDE". Such a shame, it's got a classic I'm about to fuck shit up" vibe like pac's "If I die tonight" or dire straits' "tunnel of love"

"Starry Eyes" has really terrible lyrics for such a great song.

Descendent's "I'm Not a Loser" ruined by the homophobic ending

WTF "Starry Eyes" has great lyrics! Bonus points for a title that implies it's a love song.

ziggy stardust
"jamming good with weird and gilly"
"screwed up eyes and screwed down hairdo like some cat from Japan"
"the kid was just crass, he was the nazz, with God given ass"
"making love with his ego"
NO

Which "Starry Eyes"? The Records? Roky Erickson? Somebody else?

I much prefer the lyrics in Too Much Joy's version of Starry Eyes to the Records, but they're even more insidery, I think.

Descendent's "I'm Not a Loser" ruined by the homophobic ending

Hammer Smashed Bagels wrote this at 2015-01-21 00:43:18.000

So many Descendents songs ruined by misogyny too. If those guys were getting started today, they'd be fedora'd up.

academy fight song

tarnished probably isn't even right, i just have no idea wtf he's talking about

however no one can deny that "I'm not judging you, I'm judging me" is an all-time great fist pumping lyric, buried in the midst of wtf

I'm reminded of the time in high school when we couldn't figure out the lyrics to any of the songs on The Jam's In The City. So we made up our own as best as we could.

Some years later we learned what the actual lyrics were and we liked ours more. Have been (unfairly?) harsh on Weller ever since.

Yeezus

Also the Smashing Pumpkins' "Ava Adore"

― Curt1s St3ph3ns, Saturday, March 1, 2003 7:16 PM (fourteen years ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

OTM, the worst opening couplet in rock history

song is just ok but i can't get past that adore/whore shit

I've been listening to the Doors recently, and there's, er, quite a few of these in their repertoire. That "Bullets strike the helmet's head" line in "The Unknown Soldier" is one that springs immediately to mind.

Another one by Luna, from 'Sideshow by the Seashore':

Then I painted your face/On a twenty dollar bill/But it isn't legal tender/And I think about you still

Shithouse m8

I think A Night In Tunisia might possibly be bad lyrics, but how come it lifts my spirits so much? Some aberration there that needs sorting out.

"Thinkin Bout You" by Frank Ocean: an all-time classic slow jam, which makes an unrequited crush sound like some kind of communion with the divine. The falsetto is other-worldly.
But every time i hear it, i wish he'd just left out the second verse:

No, I don't like you, I just thought you were cool enough to kick it
Got a beach house I could sell you in Idaho
Since you think I don't love you, I just thought you were cute
That's why I kissed you
Got a fighter jet, I don't get to fly it though, I'm lying down

Actually the first verse is pretty dodgy too. It was like an act of intentional self-sabotage.