Let's Win the New Yorker Caption Contest

"I bet all those real men over there have penises THIS long but you don't because you are a bookish man without any love of football nor beer."

chrisht this is a poor cartoon

Is it only the football team that gives you these feelings of jealousy or do you think your husband enjoys other types of jets with his friends?

"Theess men you see, vot are they doink now?

I like this one if it's the woman speaking.

"I've heard of having art in a therapist's office, but that cardboard cutout of three men watching television is just distracting!"

"When I said that the English football team needed their heads examined, this isn't what I had in mind!"

"This happens every time The Wiggles are on!"

"I don't feel that this is appropriate"

http://25.media.tumblr.com/cb7fb3de7d12232048de0dc7b98ba15d/tumblr_mu0fkjCycn1r95b6lo1_500.jpg

http://www.newyorker.com/images/2013/10/21/g290/131021_contest_g290.jpg

• "Who has the floor?"
• "Why not? We defy every other law."
• "Good, very good. Now let's all try to think it back into the box."

http://www.newyorker.com/images/2013/11/04/p465/131104_contest_p465.jpg

"They still look nothing like your cave paintings"

"We might need glasses."

"I think we accidentally wandered into XKCD."

"are they supposed to be deer?"

"Installation art is such tripe."

"Don't worry, the real deer are still on my laptop"

"We'll need at least four to complete our Tetris set."

"Try for a clean shot or we'll get a wrecked angle"

"this triangulation method is working like a charm"

"they'll cgi in the real deer in post and - voila - paleolithic park"

"We all start off with rectangles -- with time you'll move on to more complex polygons and before you know it you'll be skinning hypercubes with Grogh."

"I miss skeuomorphism."

http://www.newyorker.com/images/2013/10/28/g290/131028_contest_g290.jpg

• "I'd like to try group therapy with a different group."
• "I don't need therapy—I just need the remote!"
• "This is why I didn't want a Monday-night appointment!"

http://www.newyorker.com/images/2013/11/11/p465/131111_contest_p465.jpg

"Bang! Bang! Bang! heh....heh...Bang!"

"Skype-ing again, huh? I remember when we had to make trunk calls"

"This room ain't big enough for the both of us."

"Look at my walking stick"

"I am not an animal! I am a human being! I am a man!"

"there are still two important issues we're afraid to mention here!"

Dammit beaten to that one

"For fucks sake Jonathan will you ever stop writing WALSH on the carpet?"

"All this time and I never thought to lie down."

"Take out the trash! Did you honestly think I'd forget?"

"It's an elephant gun! Geddit?!"

"Maybe you can explain why that table lamp has a handle on it like a jug."

"Why is the top half of your body elephant but the bottom half sea lion?"

omg the return of the jug lamp!

"And why do we both have ears like bats?"

http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/en/d/d8/ReturnoftheMackSingle.jpg
Return of the lamp
You know that I'll be camp

"She left us son. Just upped and gone just like that. All that time trumpety trumping on about that damned circus...never thought she'd follow it up. Alright well I'm off to the peanut shop again, see you at dinner."

"Don't you know it's September 11? Never forget."

"When I was your age there wasn't even such a THING as elephant incest porn!"

"An elephant never Googles" seems about right

like i'd bet even money that or some permutation will be in the three selected

"If I'd been born in 1159, when the world was steadier, I might well have felt, at 53, that the next generation would share my values and appreciate the same things I appreciated; no apocalypse pending. But I was born in 1959, when TV was something you watched only during prime time, and people wrote letters and put them in the mail, and every magazine and newspaper had a robust books section, and venerable publishers made long-term investments in young writers, and New Criticism reigned in English departments, and the Amazon basin was intact, and antibiotics were used only to treat serious infections, not pumped into healthy cows. It wasn't necessarily a better world (we had bomb shelters and segregated swimming pools), but it was the only world I knew to try to find my place in as a writer."

"Can you find my dead wife, Ella Phantzgerald, on Facebook?"

hahah

"Netscape?"

Or "In my day we DIDN'T forget"