Yippee-IA, Motherf***ers! IRRATIONALLY ANGRY PT. 2: Irrationally Angrier

and 'funny' BBC news reporters generally.

r, i c

Not to be too 'society is in the gutter', but I feel like this is a fairly recent development, or certainly that there was less of this stuff ten years ago.

ok, all these buzzfeed/upworthy links that specifically tell me how I will feel about something in advance -- "This slideshow of 27 disabled cats is the CUTEST THING YOU'LL SEE ALL DAY" "This genius boy will win you over in only 90 seconds" etc. It's just like that annoying relative who ruins his own jokes by prefacing them with "I've got the funniest joke, this is the funniest joke, you ready?"

IA at the publisher of the Slash autobiography who thought it would be cool to have ridic huge pull-quotes splashed throughout the book, and slightly skewed margins that are supposed to imply 'heyy yah whatever man it's rock n roll we don't care about MARGINS' but it mostly just looks like they fucked up cutting the pages or something

oh and TOO MANY EFFING TYPEFACES

stop it

the makers of the mustard i use have widened the diameter of its squeeze bottle hole

it is such a clumsy and obvious way to force ppl to 'accidentally' use too much/buy more that i am infuriated

ragh I hate that too!

Those plastic bags in building lobbies to put your wet umbrella in. They may solve the buildings problem, but then it just creates one for me.

People who 100% live in their political bubbles. Today this co-worker of mine stopped by my office to show me some editorial cartoon about Joe Lhota (GOP NYC mayoral candidate) meeting with tea party people, and getting all indignant about it, and I was like "Do you honestly think the former MTA chairman and former Giuliani deputy mayor has any real connection to the tea party?" "Well he was courting them!" It really doesn't matter that much, I dislike Lhota and most of what he stands for, but he's not some gun-nut anti-government loony.

http://walking.about.com/od/shoechoice/a/wayyouwalk.htm

You might be able to get orthopaedic insoles that will correct it if it really is a problem.

― carl agatha, Friday, October 11, 2013 1:01 PM (6 days ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

Sounds like I might be prone to this and when I went into a doctor for various things today she forwarded me to a specialist which is supposed to take a long time. She was asking me if I had joint pains in knees etc. Looked at the way my feet touched the floor as I stood barefoot and said that it did look like I was rather pro but it will probably take a while before I see the specialist. Seemed like a good thing to get set up to see somebody eventually just in case it turned out to be a bad case. My cobbler said I seemed to have a way of going through heels as bad as any he'd seen or something to taht effect. Well at least there's a possible cure somewhere ahead.
Also been suffering from nosebleeds recently when i don't have a history of it and Doctor said it was likely to be outcome of flu and hopefully currently cleaned up for the time being. Had a flu shot this morning too. Also hopefully got runny stomach thing about to clear up after I've been on a gout pill too long, one of the specialists actually wanted to increase dosage of that earlier this year too. But it's supposed to be a short term medicine because the medical profession is aware that it causes diarrhoea.
Now just wishing that springcleaning the apartment was going faster. has gone further than it has in years here but still taking forever.

Buying a bag of granola that was twice the size I wanted because it was the only size the shop stocked. Only to get the bag home lift it out of my shoulder bag and have my finger go through the polythene because the size means the bag is too weak for the weight. I put it down on a surface and have now found out it's split at the other end too.
Christ this is mindless. Why make them that big if they can't support the weight?

& all this because for some reason the place I normally get the stuff from can't get their normal stuff delivered. I can't see what is in the mix that could be that hard to get hold of, there are no rare ingredients. But that shop makes things in a usable size and the bags don't split.

people who try to weave through stop and go beltway traffic

ok not irrational

also people who tailgate in an obvious "i'm tailgating you" sort of way, in stop and go beltway traffic, also not irrational

their bumpers are for bumping

taped three comedy things on tv last night, all of which have 'uncut' versions later in the week. i can watch them now but i'd also watch the long versions so that's a waste of time. i can hold on for the long versions but the long versions tend to move around in the schedules, sometimes disappear completely.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OTKF4EC86iw

When I'm stuck in the office late (like now) there's this one older cleaning lady that always rolls by and when she gets to my office goes "still here?" and I can't put my finger on why it irritates me, because she's being perfectly nice, but it irritates the shit out of me. Maybe it's just because usually by that time I've been in the office over 13 hours and I'm getting irritable.

"nooh, I'm on the train home, me"

I totally get the irritation and perhaps even the the inexcusable asshole response of "still a cleaning lady?" you may be tempted - but resisting - to use.

I get the even worse comment from one of my managers who'll roll by my desk when I'm in the middle of finishing up a project and say, "It's five o'clock! Go home!"

Dear dog owners,

Autumn is an especially magical time of year to let your dogs crap on footpaths and not pick it up. Within an hour or two, the offending item will be covered in dead leaves just like the rest of the footpath, making for an extra special surprise for a pedestrian.

For bonus points, when they finally find something stuck to their shoe, they'll think, "eh, it's just a leaf." They may pick it off right away and get unexpectedly thumb-deep in dogshit, or maybe they'll pick the dry outer bits of leaf off, think the rest is NBD, and a day later slowly realise that the terrible rotting excrement smell in the office is coming from somewhere very nearby, and maybe everyone else has already worked that out...

(starts on third application of hand sanitiser)

I get the even worse comment from one of my managers who'll roll by my desk when I'm in the middle of finishing up a project and say, "It's five o'clock! Go home!"

I have two line managers who form a tag team where one of them tells me I have to totally make up every minute of time I spend at a weekly medical appointment and one of them comes round at 5:20 going "why are you still here?" as if being at work after 5 is a sure indication of being up to something (to be fair there was one coworker before my time who had the keys to the building and... yeah I probably shouldn't talk about that on the public internets)

so last night I saw Nine Inch Nails (it was ok - I was not in the greatest of moods, had a bad week). I wasn't sure who the opening act was (as at the time I bought tickets, it was TBA), and I asked my friend, and she said "Gary Numan and Godspeed You Black Emperor", which I thought was weird as no other leg of the tour had more than one opener, and arena shows don't run very late generally. But I figured she knew more than me.

After Numan played, of course, NiN came out, and my research clearly shows that when they announced on the net who the opener would be for NiN, they clearly listed Numan, and the dates for GYBE ended on 10/29 and wouldn't resume until mid-November. So it was never announced that they would play.

Friend was posting all angry on FB and talking about how pissed she is that they didn't play. I'm kinda like...so you're pissed that you can't read?

this one dude who creates pleased-with-himself spreadsheets full of embedded formulas and colorcoding and managed print areas so it all looks lovely and uniform that are otherwise completely incomprehensible and the only way to get any useful information from it is to show it to a coworker and say, um, does this mean what I think it means or is this something else?

I mean on top of the fact that the task I'm performing doesn't really require a spreadsheet at all - I just need a list with titles and quantities on it.
Instead I get a quantity column, and another column full of random 1's that is supposed to indicate...something...and rows of titles and quantities showing 0 *and* a 1 in the weird column and the color coding is supposed to indicate something else and it's like, the Excel Awards for Excellence Judging Panel is over *there* -- I just need information, buddy. I mean, it's great if that spreadsheet serves him some purpose in his own office but jesus christ how about editing it for comprehension's sake

it drives me insane

Oh and in the past we've requested simplified versions and he has refused. They're like his children or something idk

Sounds like the kind of guy who would be into lifehacks

I think I'm that guy, sorry.

Mine all make perfect sense though.

i'll take yours over this guy's

I should have a spreadsheet battle with him.

I get the even worse comment from one of my managers who'll roll by my desk when I'm in the middle of finishing up a project and say, "It's five o'clock! Go home!"

― pplains, Friday, November 1, 2013 8:38 AM Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

There's a more senior guy in my office who rolls by and says "Go home and see your family." He's single. If he had a family, he would probably understand that there is no way I would be staying in the office late if I had the option to go home and see my family at that moment.

That dude needs a summary tab auto-updating the info you need in a distilled format. Feel free to send it to me and I can try and then you can show it to him and be like "I did this, can you keep this summary page on there? It'll be no extra work for you" :P

lol I should totally do that

There's a more senior guy in my office who rolls by and says "Go home and see your family." He's single. If he had a family, he would probably understand that there is no way I would be staying in the office late if I had the option to go home and see my family at that moment.

I thought you were heading for "If he had a family, he would probably understand why I'm still at the office."

ha

(me in five years)

Take my wife... please!!!

that what i thought too

totally rational but howsabout when you're at the pharmacy to get your emergency replacement anxiety pills and the dude in front of you at the Pickup line is actually dropping off instead of picking up, then asking detailed questions about how much it's going to cost and it winds up taking like ten minutes when all yo uwant to do is pick up two prescriptions that you called in in advance.

i use pharmacies to work on my anger issues

there's always some annoying motherfucker ahead of you at a pharmacy

There's always some annoying motherfucker ahead of you EVERYWHERE

Never mind all that..

What about joining a longgggg queue, and 15 mins later you are just about at the head of the queue now, and you look behind you and there's nobody joined the queue after you did. I hate that.

I like the one where you are waiting in a huge queue and you get right up to 2nd in line, and the person in front of you starts spacing out, and the cashier/clerk/customs agent is going "next in line PLEASE!" over and over...

What about the one when there's only one till open and a long queue and just when you get to the front of the queue they open another till

the one where ppl in front of you in a queue won't move up & the gap ever widens & when they do move it's like an inch, and they's so laconic & oblivious & you just want to PUSH THEM FORWARD SO HARD shouting AGGGHH WOULD YOU MOOOOOVE FFS

And then people join the queue in front of you..

the one where all the queues are long and you're past the end of the conveyor belt for ages and nobody opens a new till, and as soon as your queue moves forward so you're between two belts and can't get out so fast they open one

or the EVERY TIME where you're waiting for ages at the back of a queue with 2 items in your hands and as soon as they open a new line some bastards appear from nowhere with trolleys full of a week's shopping and roll in ahead of you

trying to be less angry but not gonna happen as long as there is shopping and commuting to be done

was in LIDL 2 days ago and approaching tills at a quiet time of the day, so one of the 2 girls on tills decides to go off and run a message or something as I approached. Not sure if she said something before she went cos I had a walkman on, I just assumed she was closing the till.
But she came back after I had all my stuff on the conveyor belt and one person behind me. So everybody gets to go through till before me as the one person ahead of me has been doing a major weekly shop. Lovely.

that little fucking x in the top corner when looking at individual facebook posts. does it mean 'close' like every other top-right x in the whole world? no, it's FLAG THIS POST.

if my co-worker pops his big bird head up over the cube one more time to ask me a question im gonna punch him in the eye