Worst TV adverts of the moment

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The Daily Mail "Free 'teach yourself Spanish' CD" one that's just been on. What Spanish phrase do they show someone saying to show how fluent in Spanish you'll be after buying their paper?

"Ti amo"

― Cressida Breem (neruokruokruokne?), Friday, 12 May 2006 17:46 (seventeen years ago) link

the Pepsi / XBox open top bus / victory parade thing.

― koogs (koogs), Tuesday, 16 May 2006 11:17 (seventeen years ago) link

Oh God, yes. It makes me feel sorry for Barry Davies, that he is reduced to such hackery.

― Jerry the Nipper (Jerrynipper), Tuesday, 16 May 2006 11:21 (seventeen years ago) link

"Be a high rate saver!"

― Ste (Fuzzy), Tuesday, 16 May 2006 11:31 (seventeen years ago) link

What about the one for some kind of snack that has people being thrown into a dungeon by some strange king-type chappie?

― Hello Sunshine (Hello Sunshine), Tuesday, 16 May 2006 11:37 (seventeen years ago) link

Not that I can see it down here, but I am reliably informed that the current ad campaign for the Scottish Daily Record is spectacularly abysmal. Confirmation?

― Marcello Carlin (nostudium), Tuesday, 16 May 2006 11:52 (seventeen years ago) link

Be A High-Rate Saver sung to the tune of Rhinestone Cowboy.

― koogs (koogs), Friday, 19 May 2006 08:18 (seventeen years ago) link

four weeks pass...

i quite like this Ford Focus ST advert I think. the one with weird things happening in a futuristing setting and is about kind of what you wanted to be in the future. i mean. it's alright.

anyway the point is that THEN there is another one by Zurich insurance "what happens" that talks also about the future, and how you can't predict weird things that happen. Uses an instrumental version of the same tune, and a few shots are inside a car! made me almost think it's the same advert until like right at the end it was like insurance wot!

co-incidence?

― ken c (ken c), Friday, 16 June 2006 11:16 (seventeen years ago) link

Haven't gone through all of this thread, so apologies if it's already been mentioned, but...At Home With Beefy And Lamby...dear oh dear oh dear...

― Marcello Carlin (nostudium), Friday, 16 June 2006 11:22 (seventeen years ago) link

the frosties advert

― RJG (RJG), Friday, 16 June 2006 11:27 (seventeen years ago) link

fuckin otm.

― Seriously, Try Punching This Guy in the Face and See What Happens (Enrique), Friday, 16 June 2006 11:29 (seventeen years ago) link

Rarely so OTM!

― Il mio nome e' Dadaismus (Dada), Friday, 16 June 2006 11:31 (seventeen years ago) link

what's the current frosties ad?

― jed_ (jed), Friday, 16 June 2006 11:33 (seventeen years ago) link

They're going to be GRRR... oh, I've been shot.

― accentmonkey (accentmonkey), Friday, 16 June 2006 11:34 (seventeen years ago) link

oh yeah that kid needs slapping

― theantmustdance (theantmustdance), Friday, 16 June 2006 11:34 (seventeen years ago) link

The Tom Tom ads

― robster (robster), Friday, 16 June 2006 11:36 (seventeen years ago) link

That car advert featuring lots of 'wacky' people singing a 'zany' version of 'What A Wonderful World'. Kill them all.

― Teh HoBBercraft (the pirate king), Friday, 16 June 2006 11:37 (seventeen years ago) link

I hate seeing the same actors in different ads - 4 years at RADA to sell remedies for thrush, well done

― Il mio nome e' Dadaismus (Dada), Friday, 16 June 2006 11:40 (seventeen years ago) link

Quote me fucking happy.

― Onimo (GerryNemo), Friday, 16 June 2006 11:42 (seventeen years ago) link

Indeed, inexplicably it still thrives

― Il mio nome e' Dadaismus (Dada), Friday, 16 June 2006 11:47 (seventeen years ago) link

4 years at RADA to sell remedies for thrush, well done

I doubt that was their motivation

― Teh HoBBercraft (the pirate king), Friday, 16 June 2006 11:48 (seventeen years ago) link

> The Tom Tom ads

that's exactly what i was thinking needed posting to this thread. especially the one with the fish-faced woman and her accent.

― koogy wonderland (koogs), Friday, 16 June 2006 11:50 (seventeen years ago) link

Quote Me Bastard Happy.

Should Craig Cash now follow the Jay Leno/Doritos procedure as outlined by Bill Hicks?

― Marcello Carlin (nostudium), Friday, 16 June 2006 12:05 (seventeen years ago) link

They're going to be GRRR... oh, I've been shot.
-- accentmonkey (tris...) (webmail), Today 12:34 PM. (later) (link)

They are frosties. They're all right. they aren't worth going down the street about. And in any case, you wake up, go downstaris, and have breakfast. Where's he been? Where's he going? Is he anticipating the next morning's cereal? Why would he do that? And is Ian Dury's estate getting royalties for the blatant ripoff of "I want to be straight"? Or is it his just reward for ripping "ello tosh got a toshiba" and paying Alexei Sayle nowt?

― mark grout (mark grout), Friday, 16 June 2006 12:10 (seventeen years ago) link

They're gonna taste great,
They're gonna taste great,
I can hear the sound of Frosties hitting me plate,
They're gonna taste great,
With Tony your mate,
Well everybody knows Frosties taste great!
Even ladies who wait,
Or a pirate,
And your teenage brother who's out on a date!
If you live in Oz, mate,
Or the Empire State,
Even ladies with personalised number plates,
Or a bloke in a crate,
Well he knows they taste great!
They're gonna taste great,
They're gonna taste gre
They're gonna taste great,
They're gonna taste great!

― RJG (RJG), Friday, 16 June 2006 12:16 (seventeen years ago) link

You'll be next.

― accentmonkey (accentmonkey), Friday, 16 June 2006 12:19 (seventeen years ago) link

shot?

― RJG (RJG), Friday, 16 June 2006 12:21 (seventeen years ago) link

Frosties ad slightly redeemed by presence of random pirate (even if they do make pi-rate rhyme with great). That kid's jubilant little dance as he sails off into the air at the end is just his way of asking for a doing.

My pet hate, though I strongly suspect it is just me, is the current one for the Scottish Tourist Board/visitscotland. It shows a young and good-looking couple having a grown-up and good-looking coupley type city break - in a hotel room, in a restaurant, walking around, etc. It is clearly, to my having-lived-there-since-I-was-a-teensy-ailsa eyes, shot in Inverness. I imagine this is not clear to anyone who hasn't been to Inverness, as the back of the castle and the Greig Street Bridge aren't quite indicative of Scottish City Breaks as, say, Edinburgh Castle. Yet nowhere in the ad does it go "this lovely fun and vibrant place is Inverness, please come and visit it", it just says "have a city break in Scotland". So you think "I'm yer target audience, young, handsome, fond of fine wines and good food, I must go and have a break somewhere like, ooh, Scotland", guess where it is, wrongly, and you end up having a shite time in Dundee.

― ailsa (ailsa), Friday, 16 June 2006 12:27 (seventeen years ago) link

No-one goes to Dundee by accident, surely.

― mark grout (mark grout), Friday, 16 June 2006 12:29 (seventeen years ago) link

shot?

You know it, toots.

― accentmonkey (accentmonkey), Friday, 16 June 2006 12:36 (seventeen years ago) link

that frosties ad seems really australian to me. another awful ad is the loans one where everyone's inexplicably talking to camera in the street in the piss-down rain and one of them's an old guy who gets really ratty and goes "i'm a pensioner, where do I go for a loan?" and it cuts to a hell-hole call-centre.

― michael wells (michael w.), Friday, 16 June 2006 12:41 (seventeen years ago) link

That Andy Gray one, "If you think playing football is hard, try watching it". Apart from the statement itself being bollocks, I hate that Anglo Scottish accent he has, if I ever end up sounding like that then I hope someone will do me a favour and shoot me

― Il mio nome e' Dadaismus (Dada), Friday, 16 June 2006 12:55 (seventeen years ago) link

Is it actually Andy Gray? There seems to be a few adverts around at the moment featuring what sounds like and Englishman doing a poor impression of Andy Gray.

― Teh HoBBercraft (the pirate king), Friday, 16 June 2006 12:57 (seventeen years ago) link

All loan ads are terrible, but I reserve a special piece of spleen specifically to vent at that one with Phil Tufnell pretending to look really interested in the debt-hawking fuckwit call centre staff.

― ailsa (ailsa), Saturday, 17 June 2006 12:21 (seventeen years ago) link

ok i don't know if it's particularly bad but wtf is that becks ad with the 4 dancing guys in various states of animation about? i don't get the concept at all.

― michael wells (michael w.), Saturday, 17 June 2006 20:20 (seventeen years ago) link

the concept explained

― grimly fiendish (grimlord), Saturday, 17 June 2006 23:00 (seventeen years ago) link

meanwhile: at one o'clock on the morning of father's day, the airwaves are full of adverts for, er, father's day CDs. well, i suppose you can pick one up at the petrol station cheaply before paying that cursory annual visit, you miserable GBP fucks.

this one is particularly nauseating and deserves a thread to itself.

― grimly fiendish (grimlord), Saturday, 17 June 2006 23:28 (seventeen years ago) link

the transport for london one really annoys me; partly because of the mendacity; partly for the velvet underground thing; partly for the gordon ramsey product placement.

― Roughage Crew (Enrique), Tuesday, 20 June 2006 10:21 (seventeen years ago) link

*looks up mendacity*

yes, agree with you on all three counts

― Konal Doddz (blueski), Tuesday, 20 June 2006 10:29 (seventeen years ago) link

i was on bus for 90 mins from highgate-camden this morning. fucked if i have time for all the other stuff.

― Roughage Crew (Enrique), Tuesday, 20 June 2006 10:30 (seventeen years ago) link

Last night chez-moi:

Son (aged 13) : hey dad, you've got to see that transport for London ad, there's a guy trying out a Fender Jaguar.
Me : cool! Give me a shout if it comes on again.
(Later)
Son - it's on! (split-second later) oh you missed the Jag!
(Later)
Son - it's on again! Quick!
Me - where? where's the Jag?
Son (tetchily) - you missed it again.

Is the bloody guitar in the ad, or is he having me on?

― Dr.C (Dr.C), Tuesday, 20 June 2006 10:36 (seventeen years ago) link

yes he buys or tries a guitar in a shop in denmark street.

― Roughage Crew (Enrique), Tuesday, 20 June 2006 10:38 (seventeen years ago) link

he is the indiest man ever!

― Konal Doddz (blueski), Tuesday, 20 June 2006 10:41 (seventeen years ago) link

It's the sort of advert which makes me want to emigrate to Greenland.

― Marcello Carlin (nostudium), Tuesday, 20 June 2006 10:52 (seventeen years ago) link

The TalkSport one with that "de-der-de-der-der" tune at German immigration control is awful, with them pullinng things out of their jackets is awful but strangely compelling, a bit like TalkSport itself.

What is that "de-der-de-der-der" tune anyway?

― Alba (Alba), Tuesday, 20 June 2006 10:56 (seventeen years ago) link

...then seize control of the island, split from Denmark, develop a nuclear weapons programme and destroy London.

xpost (obv)

― Hello Sunshine (Hello Sunshine), Tuesday, 20 June 2006 10:56 (seventeen years ago) link

awful.

― Alba (Alba), Tuesday, 20 June 2006 10:57 (seventeen years ago) link

All those ads which start 'Dave Halfwit was trying to fix an aerial to his roof during a thunderstorm. "I was trying to fix an aerial to my roof during a thunderstorm when I slipped and quite badly grazed myself - I was off work for a year but [some dodgy law firm] helped me get back on my feet with a cheque for £7"' I especially hate the one with the woman slipping over and I don't know why, 'cos I feel I should feel sorry for her.

― Ned T.Rifle (nedtrifle), Tuesday, 20 June 2006 11:15 (seventeen years ago) link

No...just emigrate to Greenland. To get away from the Cool Police.

― Marcello Carlin (nostudium), Tuesday, 20 June 2006 11:18 (seventeen years ago) link

That kid's jubilant little dance as he sails off into the air at the end is just his way of asking for a doing.

OTM

The quote me happy ads really need to be stopped don't they.

― Ste (Fuzzy), Tuesday, 20 June 2006 11:28 (seventeen years ago) link

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