With a painfully catchy jingle at :26 here - https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kl-_AaIedZQ
xp Clouds knows.
― carl agatha, Tuesday, 3 September 2013 16:27 (ten years ago) link
More shirts. This time, it looks like it originated as a facebook meme, was turned into a shirt, then photographed and re-memed
https://sphotos-a.xx.fbcdn.net/hphotos-frc3/1231208_382178548574532_442031021_n.jpg
― how's life, Tuesday, 3 September 2013 16:28 (ten years ago) link
lol at you fellow midwesterners
― space is deep (mh), Tuesday, 3 September 2013 16:29 (ten years ago) link
I wish I could find the full version of the Menard's jingle. It's right up there with the Ideal jingle (If you've got a passion for fashion/if you've got a craving for savings/take the wheel of your automobile and swing on down to... IDEAL) for insane catchiness.
― carl agatha, Tuesday, 3 September 2013 16:30 (ten years ago) link
will rep for aly & aj's rush, a fair amount of ashlee and lilo as 'stands the test of time'. m2m is woefully unremembered.
― "Dave Barlow" is the name Lou uses on sabermetrics baseball sites (s.clover), Tuesday, 3 September 2013 16:49 (ten years ago) link
whoops, totally wrong thread
― "Dave Barlow" is the name Lou uses on sabermetrics baseball sites (s.clover), Tuesday, 3 September 2013 16:51 (ten years ago) link
Menards was on the receiving end of one of my favorite MST3K gags during the opening credits for The Giant Spider Invasion.
― Domo Arigato, Demi Lovato (Phil D.), Tuesday, 3 September 2013 17:06 (ten years ago) link
― space is deep (mh), Tuesday, September 3, 2013 11:29 AM Bookmark Flag Post Permalink
Yeah, after seeing who's responded to this, especially clouds, I'm like "oh yeah, so that's where I heard of this place."
― pplains, Tuesday, 3 September 2013 17:27 (ten years ago) link
"Menards" must always be said loudly in the manner of the man from the commercials. Also I was really shocked a couple years ago to hear that John Menard Jr. is worth seven billion dollars - I had no idea his empire was so vast. I was also sad that he wasn't the white haired yelling man from the commercial.
― joygoat, Tuesday, 3 September 2013 17:41 (ten years ago) link
I was going to pipe up with 'no I think Mendard's a disease' but then I remembered I was thinking about Meniere's
:/
― set the controls for the heart of the sun (VegemiteGrrl), Tuesday, 3 September 2013 17:43 (ten years ago) link
I thought he was too!! Sadly, he passed long ago :(
Still they're much better than the Fleet Farm ads
― frogbs, Tuesday, 3 September 2013 17:43 (ten years ago) link
A friend in the know told me very disturbing dirt on J0hn M3n@rd, which is corroborated by the news and court filings. He's fucking nuts and vicious. And horny, apparently.
― disgruntled punter (Je55e), Tuesday, 3 September 2013 17:53 (ten years ago) link
Which fucking SUCKS b/c I went to one of their stores for the first time a couple months ago and it was a wonderland and their employees are so much knowledgeable than Home Depot's.
― disgruntled punter (Je55e), Tuesday, 3 September 2013 17:55 (ten years ago) link
that varies by store/region, really. back when we had more actual hardware stores and lumber yards, menards was known as the least clueful people on the planet
― space is deep (mh), Tuesday, 3 September 2013 18:35 (ten years ago) link
You can hit me in Home DepotHit me by the gutter guardsBut babyWhen you're angryDon't you hit me in Menard's
― touch. zing touch. you've almost convinced me I'm real (Sufjan Grafton), Tuesday, 3 September 2013 20:06 (ten years ago) link
That's a pretty interesting jingle.
― Henry Charles Hovell-Thurlow-Cumming-Bruce Hovell-Thurlow-Cumming-Br (seandalai), Tuesday, 3 September 2013 23:36 (ten years ago) link
Testicle-based Menard's jokes were my brother's favorite circa 1998
― touch. zing touch. you've almost convinced me I'm real (Sufjan Grafton), Wednesday, 4 September 2013 00:05 (ten years ago) link
Shocked to learn this place is from the USA and not Canada or the UK or Belize or something.
― i too went to college (silby), Wednesday, 4 September 2013 00:39 (ten years ago) link
Undeniable Adult Truths
1. Part of a best friend's job should be to immediately clear your computer history if you die.
2. Nothing sucks more than that moment during an argument when you realize you're wrong.
3. I take back all those times I didn't want to nap when I was younger.
4. There is great need for a sarcasm font.
5. How the hell are you supposed to fold a fitted sheet?
6. Was learning joined up writing really necessary?
7. Google maps really needs to start their directions on number 5. I'm pretty sure I know how to get out of my street.
8. Obituaries would be a lot more interesting if they told you how the person died.
9. I can't remember the last time I wasn't at least kind of tired.
10. Bad decisions make good stories.
11. You never know when it will strike, but there comes a moment at work when you know that you just aren't going to do anything productive for the rest of the day.
12. Can we all just agree to ignore whatever comes after Blu-Ray? I don't want to have to restart my collection, again.
13. I'm always slightly terrified when I exit Word and it asks me if I want to save any changes to my ten-page technical report that I swear I did not make any changes to.
14. I keep some people's phone numbers in my phone just so I know not to answer when they call.
15. I think the freezer deserves a light as well..
16. I wish Google Maps had an "Avoid Ghetto" routing option.
17. I have a hard time deciphering the fine line between boredom and hunger.
18. How many times is it appropriate to say "What?" before you just nod and smile because you still didn't hear or understand a word they said?
19. I love the sense of camaraderie when an entire line of cars team up to prevent an idiot from cutting in at the front. Stay strong, brothers and sisters!
20. Sometimes I'll look down at my watch 3 consecutive times and still not know what time it is.
21. Even under ideal conditions people have trouble locating their car keys in a pocket, finding their mobile phone, and Pinning the Tail on the Donkey - but I'd bet everyone can find and push the snooze button from 3 feet away, in about 1 .7 seconds, eyes closed, first time, every time.
FILE UNDER: Fictional first world problems
― iMacaroon dragoons (Noodle Vague), Wednesday, 4 September 2013 11:49 (ten years ago) link
aaargh FU imaginary "truth" creator
― Neil S, Wednesday, 4 September 2013 11:53 (ten years ago) link
peculiar mix of US and UK English as per. i swear if i ever hear a Brit use the word "ghetto" in a context that isn't historical or quoting a song title i will crotch-punch the fucker
― iMacaroon dragoons (Noodle Vague), Wednesday, 4 September 2013 11:57 (ten years ago) link
is that #22
― 'Understand, your daughter's addiction is not your problem' (Bananaman Begins), Wednesday, 4 September 2013 12:05 (ten years ago) link
if you ever hear an American use it you should still do that because it is almost always a racist
― Andrew Kornfan, Wednesday, 4 September 2013 12:34 (ten years ago) link
yeah i know i think my objection is to Brits incorporating extra racist euphemisms when we have a broad and nuanced selection of our own
― iMacaroon dragoons (Noodle Vague), Wednesday, 4 September 2013 12:36 (ten years ago) link
"joined up writing" is a Britishism, right? Do Americans say that?
― I have gathered no gaudy flowers of speech in other men's gardens (dowd), Wednesday, 4 September 2013 12:42 (ten years ago) link
That list is one of the worst things posted in the thread. Every single item makes me want to argue back with the poster (for different reasons), the style is atrocious and deflates even the potential for some kind of snappy comic rhythm or EVEN Chicken Soup For The Soul 'words of wisdom,' they meander between statements and questions for no reason, the premise that the author is an 'adult' seems flimsy at best, and basically it all sounds like hastily-jotted ideas for a really painful, lumpy stand-up routine. And ugggggh the cutesyness. I can just hear the badly-concealed desperation for a laugh, the 'performance' notes leaking into what was a totally natural conversation before this person came in. All that's missing is ''Chocolate? Equals yum. YOU know what I'm talking about, biyotch!''
― Doctor Casino, Wednesday, 4 September 2013 12:43 (ten years ago) link
the compiled wisdom of a very boring person
― #fomo that's the motto (Hurting 2), Wednesday, 4 September 2013 14:25 (ten years ago) link
Things You Didn't Know As A Teenager
1) Make sure to see check itemizing your deductions can help your taxes.2) Car insurance rates can vary drastically based on your record and provider.3) Where did I put my keys again?4) Make sure to keep plenty of quarters for laundry.5) Eating plenty of fish can be good for your health.
― "Dave Barlow" is the name Lou uses on sabermetrics baseball sites (s.clover), Wednesday, 4 September 2013 14:34 (ten years ago) link
lmao at a world in which "How the hell are you supposed to fold a fitted sheet?" is an Undeniable Truth
― 1 P.3. Eternal (roxymuzak), Wednesday, 4 September 2013 14:38 (ten years ago) link
there's also a really easy way to "start at 5" with google maps directions. You just start at 5.
― #fomo that's the motto (Hurting 2), Wednesday, 4 September 2013 14:39 (ten years ago) link
i can't fold fitted sheets neatly to be fair but i'm coping
― iMacaroon dragoons (Noodle Vague), Wednesday, 4 September 2013 14:40 (ten years ago) link
This is the one that really got me boggling at that list: 8. Obituaries would be a lot more interesting if they told you how the person died.
Errrr.... they do?
― emil.y, Wednesday, 4 September 2013 15:14 (ten years ago) link
Not all of them.
― pplains, Wednesday, 4 September 2013 15:23 (ten years ago) link
Ours don't, and let me tell you something, it would be much more informative for me if I knew whether or not that guy my age died in a motorcycle accident or from a heart attack.
or bizarre gardening accident
― Neil S, Wednesday, 4 September 2013 15:36 (ten years ago) link
"joined up writing" was stage 2 in the joined up thinking about joined up thinking iirc
― "Asshole Lost in Coughdrop": THAT'S a story (darraghmac), Wednesday, 4 September 2013 15:39 (ten years ago) link
http://www.webanswers.com/post-images/8/85/BCB3A043-C100-419B-9E0652ECFF84A7CF.jpg
Not that I bother, they go straight back on the bed.
― She makes flapjack (doo dah), Wednesday, 4 September 2013 17:09 (ten years ago) link
Sweet lifehack
― touch. zing touch. you've almost convinced me I'm real (Sufjan Grafton), Wednesday, 4 September 2013 17:33 (ten years ago) link
I assume we've done this shit already:
https://fbcdn-sphotos-a-a.akamaihd.net/hphotos-ak-frc1/999716_432528283528322_590125093_n.jpg
It's not even right for this October anyway.
― ailsa, Wednesday, 4 September 2013 18:35 (ten years ago) link
There are only 14 calendars and seven of those are for leap years. Any given "October" is going to cycle through at least once every 20 years or so, if not more.
― pplains, Wednesday, 4 September 2013 18:46 (ten years ago) link
haha, a couple of times now, I think -- pretty sure it's looking more and more fucked up each time though. At some point that text's gonna be unreadable.
― Øystein, Wednesday, 4 September 2013 18:46 (ten years ago) link
Sounds like a good plot device for a horror movie. Every 823, an ancient demon arises and kills via cursed money... This October, you'd better watch out for... MoneyBags!
― PRISON WARDEN CONSCIOUSNESS (4th Dimension) (Viceroy), Wednesday, 4 September 2013 18:52 (ten years ago) link
*823 years.
― PRISON WARDEN CONSCIOUSNESS (4th Dimension) (Viceroy), Wednesday, 4 September 2013 18:53 (ten years ago) link
Tagline for the horror movie's right there, too:"Can't hurt so I did it :)"
― Øystein, Wednesday, 4 September 2013 18:55 (ten years ago) link
would watch.
― carl agatha, Wednesday, 4 September 2013 19:11 (ten years ago) link
this is called moneybags
― HOOS it because...of steen???? (BIG HOOS aka the steendriver), Wednesday, 4 September 2013 19:16 (ten years ago) link
money bags
― your authentic guitar playing self (elmo argonaut), Wednesday, 4 September 2013 19:28 (ten years ago) link
I've been doing it all wrong, mine has been based on Ugandan Feng Shui. ;_;
― Marlo Poco (Phil D.), Wednesday, 4 September 2013 19:29 (ten years ago) link
Why is it called Money Bags?
― Mark G, Wednesday, 4 September 2013 21:40 (ten years ago) link
cuz you got bags of money, also cuz Money Dags is an anagram of Day Gnomes.
― Øystein, Wednesday, 4 September 2013 21:46 (ten years ago) link