Football journalism

I didn't check it out, but I'm sure that yesterday they had audio of a robot voice reading the thing.

unless it was a daft punk troggs tape, idk

list of informative and concise paul wilson columns

LEAGUE WINNERS

Louise Taylor

Tottenham. Europa League involvement and the potential loss of Gareth Bale are worries but Roberto Soldado and Paulinho look excellent signings and AVB is a class coach.

ban her

Not sure what I'm doing reading the Guardian's 'Rumour Mill' now that they are liveblogging the transfer world, but jesus christ it's irritating.

But Alan Pardew will not be outdone. No one outdoes Alan Pardew, for he is Alan Pardew, and Alan Pardew is Alan Pardew. Alan Pardew! Therefore he has been dragged to France by Joe Kinnear and Graham Carr, and ordered to sit in silence with his finger on his lips while they watched Bafétimbi Gomis and Yoann Gourcuff. Then, he was forced to eat his dinner, every last bit of it, and sent to bed while the big boys discussed what to do. He is Alan Pardew.

Meanwhile, relief for Manchester United: sometimes this week, Besiktas plan to sign their "left-back" Alexander Büttner on loan. No one at the club is quite sure why, but they are rumoured to have a vacancy for a free-kick mannequin.

And United will also be relieved to learn that after an intense period of intense psychotherapy and physical rehabilitation, Everton have recovered from the derision and insult that massacred their Monday. It has been a long road back, but, eventually, they made it, and they're here, and they're ready, and they survived, and waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaah, of course there will be occasional lapses waaaaaaaaaaaaaaah, it's to be expected, triggers, breathe, waaaaaaaah waaaaaaaaaaaah, calm. But they're here, and in the way that light can be found in the darkest places, a bulb has illuminated in the dinky little head of Roberto Martínez: sign James McCarthy from Wigan. Martínez plans to pay Wigan as much as possible, to avoid visiting upon them the same horror endured by him.

Their house style is fucking abysmal. They all try to get this mixture of cynicism and whimsy across while straining really hard to let everyone know that they are so far above caring about stupid football.

I thought that was David Peace for a minute

Their house style is fucking abysmal. They all try to get this mixture of cynicism and whimsy across while straining really hard to let everyone know that they are so far above caring about stupid football.

otm. it's like lawro with a better education.

I thought that was David Peace for a minute

― Ismael Klata, Wednesday, 21 August 2013 10:29 (12 minutes ago) Bookmark

you know who it is though right

http://static.guim.co.uk/sys-images/Guardian/Pix/pictures/2011/4/5/1302019018185/Daniel_Harries.jpg

http://rlv.zcache.com/im_that_guy-r1289ab0e64804baa8a45db357ac030b9_v9wfy_8byvr_324.jpg

http://static.guim.co.uk/sys-images/Guardian/Pix/pictures/2011/4/5/1302019018185/Daniel_Harries.jpg

They clearly got a good response to the original OBOs/MBMs written by Ronay/Smyth/Murray and have told all subsequent writers to just copy them. Jacob Steinburg seemingly chose to ape Scott Murray wholesale while most of the others, including That Guy, just write a terrible mish-mash of them all, devoid of any actual personality or feeling.

Yeah the Rumour Mill is total pish. The Fiver's pretty hit and miss depending on who's writing it but even on its off days it's comedy gold compared to:

Iker Casillas, the Real Madrid goalkeeper, has been displaced by Diego López, and accordingly, Arsenal would like to sign the former. In particular, they are attracted by his ability to play centre-back, right-back, centre-forward, manager, coach and chairman simultaneously.

ronay and hyde should just have exclusive rights to whimsy and cynicism, everyone else gets the subeditorial pepper spray

2 sentences, 39 words, 9 commas, 0 laughs. Not read the Fiver in ages, RM coincides with my first coffee+cigarette of the day - maybe this is the final push I need to stop smoking. xp

ronay is okay but can't be doing with hyde personally.

I can't remember much about Hyde or his style, is he quite like Ronay then? Will stan for Ronay tbh, he gets away with too much in terms of writing pointless articles that are all persiflage and no content, but he still makes me laugh quite a lot and I find some his ideas quite interesting, even when I disagree. I'd just be happier if they handed the whole thing over to Wilson and Cox.

i'm a not a super fanboy or anything but at least she keeps it on a fairly evenly vicious keel

Oh her, yeah just googled, I recognise the picture.

ronay was alright when he was adding flighty filigree here and there but now he's really become a bit of an overindulged monster, and moreso than his own stuff his influence on others is simply terrible

he seems very bored now.

for me, hyde just carries that "lost in showbiz" sneering tone into the football stuff. and they always wheel her out for really big obvious stories.

i like a proper sneer. demonstrably not as easy as it looks

Cox is such a dull writer.

She's great on her rare sorties to football weekly.

Ronay's always trying to capture that 'like a medieval ox hurled over the battlements' line. In fairness he'll usually get somewhere close, but you only really need to skim his articles searching for it.

that's cox's appeal, makes you feel smugger for reading him

reading this thread I frequently wonder why the luminaries of ILX don't attempt to show up these objects of scorn and envy by besting them in their field. sure spend enough time thinking & writing about football

demonstrably not as easy as it looks

haha, or perhaps easier!

imago should we start a proper football website and how to do so. i would def prefer it to ilx at this stage tbh.

Shall we try an ILF Weekly podcast, is that what you want?

both serviceable ideas

WS (would stream)

list of informative and concise paul wilson columns

― Nilmar Honorato da Silva, Wednesday, 14 August 2013 11:29 (1 month ago)

Premier League is always interesting
Paul Wilson: Even this early there are enough hints to indicate the domestic season will be full of stories
141 comments

Fraser Forster, who has emerged as the leading contender to challenge Joe Hart as England’s No 1, could emerge as a target for Manchester United. AC Milan have already declared an interest in the 25-year-old Celtic keeper.

But United could step in. Although the general form of Reds keeper David de Gea has improved, he is still prone to unforced errors.

And it is known goalkeeping coach Chris Woods is on the lookout for potential replacements. It is understood Fraser is high on the list.

After the Gunners' 4-1 vivisection of 30 million pounds-wasted-on-summer-transfer-fees Norwich, a clearly besotted Chelsea supporter sidled up to me at the Football Factory and asked whether he could buy me a pint. Now, if there's one thing I never trust, it's a seemingly pleasant guy wearing a John Terry jersey. After all, Terry himself must have acted friendly to Wayne Bridge at first too, right?

http://espnfc.com/blog/_/name/kickingandscreaming/id/576?cc=5739

fuck this gets so much worse.

he is let to the front of the toilet queue because he is an gooner by upset man utd fans because fergie retired

I told my new Ghanaian best friend that from now on he was to refer to Arsenal's next savior as Aaron Rams-messi, but that the Welshman's sick corkscrew dribble in the box that left three Norwich defenders flat on their derrieres wasn't even our best goal of the game.

Can a Frimpong hat trick be far behind? That's three goals, not a yellow, yellow and red card.

How fitting was it that Robert Pires -- who, along with Thierry Henry, Dennis Bergkamp and Patrick Vieira formed the attacking spine of that storied unbeaten side -- should be in the stands to witness the latest sleight-of-foot magic unfolding in the 18th minute. (Although I'm pretty sure that Cazorla waxes his eyebrows, which none of the Invincibles would have considered.)

But anyone who has watched Arsenal this season knows that the only holding the Welshman does is after the game when he clutches the bottle of champagne awarded to the man of the match.

fucking hell

pure ideology

Before that, however, Brendan Rodgers must try to find a way of muddling past West Bromwich Albion, which will be no easy feat. Steve Clarke's side are just a top striker and left-back away from being a serious force and are inspired by a player whom Rodgers would love to be able to call on and fill in for Coutinho. If Stéphane Sessègnon is on song on Saturday, the Baggies could beat Liverpool for the fourth time in a row. PD

perfectly captures my unease about tomorrow tbf

in turn perfectly capturing how the weekly lfc unease parade is mostly self-absorbed twaddle

long may it continue

the important thing to remember is that every time a midtable team's best player plays does well against a europa league level team, they are PAYING THE PRICE for not buying him to use as a substitute

Gary Medel has long been a ‘football hipster’ favourite, a part of Marcelo Bielsa’s beloved Chilean side that went to the 2010 World Cup. The “Chilean Gattuso” will provide plenty of tenacity, commitment and the odd yellow card.

any reference to football hipsterism in journalism is obviously execrable but if there is a football hipster favourite from the that side surely it would be isla?

michael cox is on dis ting, v nicely understated

― navihchkan (nakhchivan), Thursday, 17 May 2012 19:54 (1 year ago)

Szczesny has also developed his game thanks to increased competition -- by his own admission. "I raised my standards when Lukasz [Fabianski] got his chance in goal," he told Arsenal's match-day programme earlier this season. "When you realise your position is not safe, you give it that little bit more -- 110 percent rather than 100 percent." Which, using the footballer-to-fan percentage conversion scale, means Szczesny wasn't giving 100 percent.