Does the entire Innocent Smoothies aesthetic strike you as deeply fucking irritating?

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Picture a group of old people queueing for their pension. We're the one molesting young children.

the league against cool sports (Noodle Vague), Friday, 24 May 2013 14:09 (ten years ago) link

definitely most irked by 'chics'. actually no no, most irked by capitalised 'Fun'

OH NO, SECONDS LEFT, SECONDS LEFT, AND THERE IT IS. REGRET. (imago), Friday, 24 May 2013 14:10 (ten years ago) link

omfg vague

OH NO, SECONDS LEFT, SECONDS LEFT, AND THERE IT IS. REGRET. (imago), Friday, 24 May 2013 14:10 (ten years ago) link

Picture a group of nation states in the UN. We're the one dropping mustard gas on our own civilians.

the league against cool sports (Noodle Vague), Friday, 24 May 2013 14:12 (ten years ago) link

Picture a group of priests. We're the one who is wearing a grey shirt.

... (LocalGarda), Friday, 24 May 2013 14:12 (ten years ago) link

Picture a picture. We're the one you are imagining.

... (LocalGarda), Friday, 24 May 2013 14:12 (ten years ago) link

I was going to take a photo of that bank billboard but I didn't want the other people on the tube platform to think that I liked it, I know I'll never see them again but the thought of that judgement would weigh down on me for years.

ohmigud (Merdeyeux), Friday, 24 May 2013 14:13 (ten years ago) link

Picture a row of philosophy grads photographing the adverts on the Tube. We're the one yelling "It's coz they're fucking gash" at the top of his voice

OH NO, SECONDS LEFT, SECONDS LEFT, AND THERE IT IS. REGRET. (imago), Friday, 24 May 2013 14:15 (ten years ago) link

Picture a row of horrible adverts for shit banks. We're the one you've never heard of before.

dschinghis kraan (NickB), Friday, 24 May 2013 14:17 (ten years ago) link

there's a tv advert that is pretty much that text done as an animation. sucks as a tv ad too.

koogs, Friday, 24 May 2013 18:29 (ten years ago) link

firstdirect campaign slowly puttin me in shutdown

OH NO, SECONDS LEFT, SECONDS LEFT, AND THERE IT IS. REGRET. (imago), Tuesday, 28 May 2013 08:01 (ten years ago) link

Yeah, firstdirect TV campaign is getting right on my tits. "We're not really like a bank" - THEN WHY WOULD I WANT TO USE YOU AS A BANK, YOU FUCKWITS?

emil.y, Tuesday, 28 May 2013 13:41 (ten years ago) link

O lord I just meant the tube ads. Heaven help my heart if I see a full-length commercial

OH NO, SECONDS LEFT, SECONDS LEFT, AND THERE IT IS. REGRET. (imago), Tuesday, 28 May 2013 14:15 (ten years ago) link

Oh it is bad. It is bad bad bad.

emil.y, Tuesday, 28 May 2013 14:26 (ten years ago) link

If you really want to make yourself ill, have a look the "fun fact friday" and "wise words wednesday" posts on their facebook page.

dschinghis kraan (NickB), Tuesday, 28 May 2013 14:37 (ten years ago) link

oh those jokers!

dschinghis kraan (NickB), Tuesday, 28 May 2013 14:48 (ten years ago) link

https://fbcdn-sphotos-c-a.akamaihd.net/hphotos-ak-ash3/p480x480/5701_485296431535146_2061416327_n.jpg

these guys don't sound like your stuffy old traditional bank at all!

... (LocalGarda), Tuesday, 28 May 2013 14:57 (ten years ago) link

> Heaven help my heart if I see a full-length commercial

the tv platypus advert is something to behold.

koogs, Tuesday, 28 May 2013 19:28 (ten years ago) link

that Mark Radcliffe-sounding platypus fucker must die

the league against cool sports (Noodle Vague), Wednesday, 29 May 2013 20:50 (ten years ago) link

this type of marketing aims for public obliquity

'dont u hate {x}' is name recognition

this is quite true, but i wd've thought the aim with a bank was to appeal to people to sign up

the league against cool sports (Noodle Vague), Wednesday, 29 May 2013 20:57 (ten years ago) link

you're also suggesting that the kind of twats who come up with this kind of twat campaign are aware of the campaign's - and hence their own - twattery. which feels unlikely?

the league against cool sports (Noodle Vague), Wednesday, 29 May 2013 20:58 (ten years ago) link

for a small retail bank (division of a major one) name recognition is fine

even the slowest person capable of opening a bank account doesnt believe one is substantially different to another

Also I'd be more likely to say "don't you hate that twatty platypus campaign" over "don't you hate [whatever the bank is called]", so even then it doesn't really work. Plus I've seen several non-platypus TV ads for banks where the emphasis is on not being like a bank so it all kind of smushes together. I wonder what will happen when no banks are like banks?

emil.y, Wednesday, 29 May 2013 21:00 (ten years ago) link

banks like real ale and second-hand vinyl, they are Real England and they won't lend you a tenner while pay day.

the league against cool sports (Noodle Vague), Wednesday, 29 May 2013 21:02 (ten years ago) link

yeah i do find a lot of annoyance campaigns don't do a good job of driving home the brand name, but i am probly easily annoyed/distractible

the league against cool sports (Noodle Vague), Wednesday, 29 May 2013 21:03 (ten years ago) link

do u srsly think someone launches an obnoxious seven figure marketing campaign without noticing a lot of ppl find it obnoxious? 'creatives' neither commission it nor make the final decision

theyre facing an uphill struggle with such a generic/forgettable name

if they launched today they would probably incorporate their quirky and distinctive brand into the name itself

yeah, we really shd start to see some banks called "Snuggles" or something hitting the high street

the league against cool sports (Noodle Vague), Wednesday, 29 May 2013 21:09 (ten years ago) link

"fuck filled platypus"
5 results (0.21 seconds)

Oh, you're probably right. I mean, just paying enough money to get the name on screen multiple times at primetime means that their custom will rise, regardless of whether or not the campaign chooses 'heartwarming' 'quirky', 'eco-conscious', 'elite' or whatever.

emil.y, Wednesday, 29 May 2013 21:11 (ten years ago) link

think i'm mostly just transferring disdain for stage northerners tbh

the league against cool sports (Noodle Vague), Wednesday, 29 May 2013 21:13 (ten years ago) link

this magners advert with the grotty looking earthy irish 'poet' schmuck is really vile

realness marketing is more obnoxious than a lot of quirky marketing

i think it's Film 4 that ruins a lot of their movies with Jameson's sponsorship every ad break, that one's pretty noxious too. tho clearly the brand name has stuck with me for some reason

the league against cool sports (Noodle Vague), Wednesday, 29 May 2013 21:17 (ten years ago) link

That really is the anti-Innocent Smoothies in almost every way.

Matt DC, Friday, 31 May 2013 11:33 (ten years ago) link

Dig that tbh

OH NO, SECONDS LEFT, SECONDS LEFT, AND THERE IT IS. REGRET. (imago), Friday, 31 May 2013 12:39 (ten years ago) link

That is actually hilarious. Even if it is thought up by the same sort of cocks who equate a bank with a platypus.

emil.y, Friday, 31 May 2013 13:15 (ten years ago) link

http://www.coca-cola.co.uk/share-a-coke/share-a-coke.html

^^^ Deeply wack though.

Matt DC, Friday, 31 May 2013 13:17 (ten years ago) link

That makes the bottles look like overly elaborate urine sample containers.

go cray cray on my lobster soufflé (snoball), Friday, 31 May 2013 13:21 (ten years ago) link

The thing that I don't get with the 'share a coke' thing is that it is SO OBVIOUSLY designed to get people taking photos to put up on social media, but I've known more than one person that's gone along with it anyway. It's like, how craven do they have to be to put you off?

(Also, I actually don't get the concept - it seems that they don't want you to buy coke with your own name on it, but then do they actually want you to 'share'? It looks like not. So what do you even do with it? Nothing, except take a fucking picture and put it up on facebook. I HATE YOU COCA-COLA.)

emil.y, Friday, 31 May 2013 13:24 (ten years ago) link

Our special Share a Coke vending machines will be going on tour all over Great Britain, giving everyone that visits the location of the vending machine the chance to choose the name they would like printed on a free Coca-Cola or Coke Zero bottle.

they better have a version of

Words you can't have printed on the back of an NFL jersey

or that could be a ~social media disaster~

It seems like a very vague reference to the old 'I'd like to buy the world a coke' advert from the 70s. Like at some marketing meeting they realised that a lot of people wouldn't remember it or get the connection, but they decided to go along with the idea anyway.

go cray cray on my lobster soufflé (snoball), Friday, 31 May 2013 13:33 (ten years ago) link

Oh man, if I could get a bottle of Coke with 'PISS' printed on the side...

go cray cray on my lobster soufflé (snoball), Friday, 31 May 2013 13:34 (ten years ago) link


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