Let's Win the New Yorker Caption Contest

"Is that George Washington's empty tomb in your pocket or are you pleased to see me?"

"So which hole is your butt?"

"How exactly am I going to stimulate growth?"

"It's ok. Lots of executive bodies get filibustered sometimes."

"Don't feel bad about it. Not many people can match up to Big Ben."

It's not you, it's me.

"as sex, it was great, but as political metaphor, it was trite and hackneyed"

"Ironically, this is the least dirty thing I've done all week."

"maybe if i go on top?"

"What's the matter? Can't get an election?"

"Politics sure make for strange bedfellows, huh?"

"Now that the session's over, what do we do about the bill?"

It happens to lots of nations.

"Did you just call me Statue of Liberty?"

She's just making that clicking, droning "aaaaa" sound from The Grudge.

I fuck buildings

"I just noticed that the weirdest thing about this scene is the corded telephone"

hey, scale model of the white house, where'd you come from, a movie set or something?

my name is janine, not jolene *giggles*

heyyyyy!

"I really wish I could remove this Capitol Building finger trap"

http://www.newyorker.com/images/2013/04/22/p465/130422_contest_p465.jpg

from the naked boardroom contest, I actually really like one of the nominees:

"I was wrong, this meeting is still boring."

― Chuck E was a hero to most (s.clover), Sunday, 7 April 2013 00:00 (1 week ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

That one won.

This one is troublesome. Why is the floor gravel. Who are they phoning? The rat or w/e is not enough of the focus, these cartoons are feast or famine and i cant take it any more

"Look, we've got to get him out of here already. He's turning 27 next week."

"Pets-R-Us don't have any tigers either, and he's getting mighty close to the end of the sports section."

"I'm trying to get him back to the rat race."

"I know you said _______, but this is ridiculous!"

"apparently, Margaret Thatcher's died"

"I was wrong, this meeting is still boring."

i have to admit this made me chuckle a little bit

"I know you said anthropomorphic rat, but this is ridiculous."

"I dont care Richard, he hasnt paid his rent in three weeks and you need to go in there and talk to him

"If your experiment made him soooo smart, why is he reading the Sun?"

"I've explained it to pest control. They're consulting their ethics policies."

"yes, yes, but think of the problems a giant cat would cause"

There's a mouse in the front room will you deal with it, I'm on the phone"

"Maybe you could garrote it with this corded phone we don't use anymore."

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Inflatable_rat
something about this plz

also anything with 'kafkaesque'

"Burl Ives says he doesn't know, it's not on his list"

"We asked for unheimlich. This is more Kafkaesque."

"They think I'm lying because apparently those things never leave the Fire Swamp."

"If we call the police, won't we be just like him?"

"did you ever notice how Todd is a goddamn rat"

"Careful-- Thomas Leonard told me he has a gun."

"He keeps saying he's Billy Corgan."

"What do you think he's gonna do with the newspaper after reading it?"

"Should I tell them there's a 'Mouse in the House' or a 'Rat in the House'? One sounds better, but the other one's probably more accurate."

"Elwood, I can't stand this anymore. I thought we agreed one pooka was more than enough."

"I'm calling mother. What a 'tail' this morning has been!"