Let's Win the New Yorker Caption Contest

"This is quite an unanticipated exposure to market conditions."

"And that is how I really came to be known as the London Whale."

"Now that the board has fully bought in, we can take the Emperor clothing line to the people."

"You're just not modeling them right. These are bespoke products."

"We can't *all* have the four of diamonds!"

Ya i think the emperor avenue shall be fruitful lets send it to the lurkers for finishing

"I mean, really - what are the odds that we'd ALL mis-read a department-wide email about "naked shorting and tradeable assets"?"

I posted a winning caption sometime back that i didn't submit. Great minds etc. This isn't rocket science, it's TEH NWE YROKRE

"Well SOMEONE is going to have to go get coffee."

"we must rebut this perception that we're motivated by naked greed. think, people, think!"

"i think i see the a/c unit arriving."

"no seriously you guys the tip is totally touching the ground"

"i wish once we could work late without taking half our time up with this eternal prada or armani debate."

Deep down, Clemence was still deeply uneasy with women in the boardroom.

"When I stand like this it looks like I'm peeing ants."

"Please, Rachel, you really must stop chewing on that pencil."

"well folks we've all seen the figures, and there's no point in dressing them up."

^ awes, tom is gonna shit himself when he sees that one

"i think i see the a/c unit arriving."

― don't call it a cloud rap i've been high for years (zvookster)

this, tho

"haha. boobs."

i've met tom leonard and i've never heard him be so clever in real life.

Im not that funny irl either, devise another proof

"And now we will fork their repos with our massive dongles"

loooool

"As you can see on page 3, Lysol now accounts for 23% of our yearly budget."

"Those fucking suppliers really left us holding our dicks on this one."

"Is this is breast we can do? Um, best. Sorry, I'm a little dicktracted. Um, distracted. Fuck me."

"This fellow Tom Leonard will pay dearly for his transgressions."

"Team, Chatroulette is falling on tough times in this economy."

"Sigh... No, Nancy, you cannot get pregnant from an Aeron chair."

"I have reason to believe that someone switched my Mountain Dew with urine."

Guys tom wouldnt touch any of those, up the game ffs

"Guys. Lysol. 23%. You do the math."

There it is

"Nobody laugh when I turn around or you're fired"

"Chair was gettin' sticky"

addition to yr first one: "we fell 37% below predicted growth for this year."

"I said causal Fridays. You know, where we'd determine the antecedent conditions that were responsible for consequent events? Come on, people!"

"As you'll see momentarily, the fiscal crisis has left me with only a stack of dimes."

"When I said dress code was business casual, I meant business casual at every other business except American Apparel! Of course, that doesn't quite explain why I'm not wearing clothes either, does it?"

"Activate interlock! Dynotherms connected. Infracells up. Mega thrusters are go. FORM VOLTRON!"

"I'm really digging these new casual fridays."

"Wow! This place is swank! Can I just say-- this ain't your father's gas chamber!"

"Hey, I think this is a one-way mirror."

"you know, i could have sworn the recruiter said this was a news agency."

"Lena, you seem cold. Are you cold?"

"I like staring at your nude bodies as I work. I find it... erotic."

"I bet my dick looks like ants to all those people."

"...and to think-- all those fuckers thought I couldn't build a successful Fortune 500 business where every employee experiences a daily regimen of degrading sexual humiliation and brutal genital torture."

"Let's focus, people"

"Hey, we should bring back the suggest ban button" xp