WHAT'S THE DEFINITION OF THE AMERICAN DREAM?...

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I wouldn't be too precious over the sharing of a banana. Not long left for those yummy little beasts apparently. Eventual headline "Bananas Split"

Lynskey (Lynskey), Monday, 20 January 2003 15:45 (twenty-one years ago) link

Note to self :

Dump banana stock.
Buy up shares of "Banana Helper".

Zen Clown (Zen Clown), Monday, 20 January 2003 17:38 (twenty-one years ago) link

American Dream:

1) We are the most intelligent and democratic of all countries therefore we should intervene on everyone else's business. When there is a reaction (which rarely EVER happens, such as the saudi arabia national's symbollic attack on the world trade center) we get even more pissed off, kick out anyone who isn't a white christian, and lock down any dissent, nuking everyone outside our borders.

2) We like beer and fast and/or loud things

3) Lyndon Larouche's national monorail system and a landbridge to russia.

Wrench, Monday, 20 January 2003 21:19 (twenty-one years ago) link

Sound like somebody needs a hug..........

And a banana.

Zen Clown (Zen Clown), Monday, 20 January 2003 21:56 (twenty-one years ago) link

I dont really have a problem with German americans, or british americans. I mean those were some of the 1st here. That would be silly, and how could you even tell if they were. But liberals like Zen the Clown just pull things out their ass like about the Rio Grande. And wetbacks are a whole other story. Most off all the other immagrints who come here learn english, and become citizens. Like orientals for example.

But wetbacks are a different story. And I don't need to explain the doon coon.

, Monday, 20 January 2003 22:44 (twenty-one years ago) link

Here, here, Mr. Cock. There doesn't need to be any animosity between us.

Here, come in and have a seat. What? The tire swing? Of course.

Make yourself at home. Here. Let's get you out of those sweaty fatigues.

Nice camoflage by the way. Do you hide often?

That's quite a tatoo on your chest. A swastika is it? Do it yourself? Really? With a mirror? Really? It's backwards, you know.

O.K.. You go over and climb on the swing............

and I'll get you a banana.

Zen Clown (Zen Clown), Monday, 20 January 2003 23:56 (twenty-one years ago) link

That is getting me very horny.

Lynskey (Lynskey), Tuesday, 21 January 2003 02:04 (twenty-one years ago) link

Why is it that those white people who complain about the "english" skills of immigrants are always the ones that have are barely literate themselves? What the FUCK is an "immagrint", is this some pathetic attempt at sarcasm? Why is it some redneck Americans feel that the rest of the world should know just about everyfuckingthing about the USfucking A while they are content to revel in their complete ignorance of the rest of the world?

Anna., Tuesday, 21 January 2003 07:08 (twenty-one years ago) link

I knew it was a mistake not to read over that post

Anna., Tuesday, 21 January 2003 07:26 (twenty-one years ago) link

POST DELETED BY MODERATOR. Sorry, you went a bit over the line in terms of personal abuse.

, Tuesday, 21 January 2003 09:01 (twenty-one years ago) link

I bet you're a real hit with the ladies. What a sweet-talker!

Anna., Tuesday, 21 January 2003 09:51 (twenty-one years ago) link

Y'know, I hope somebody else has said this already in this thread, but...

IF NOT FOR IMMIGRANTS, THERE WOULD BE NO AMERICA!!!

nickalicious (nickalicious), Tuesday, 21 January 2003 18:57 (twenty-one years ago) link

By the way, please realize that folks like this do NOT represent all Americans, and some of us are actually quite open and loving and tolerant and whatnot. Okay?

nickalicious (nickalicious), Tuesday, 21 January 2003 18:58 (twenty-one years ago) link

And about the Spanish-speaking thing in Murika...

If those back-asswards Pakistanis can speak on average FOUR languages, certainly you could stand to learn mue pecunia Espaniol?

nickalicious (nickalicious), Tuesday, 21 January 2003 19:02 (twenty-one years ago) link

Good point well made.

Lynskey (Lynskey), Tuesday, 21 January 2003 22:57 (twenty-one years ago) link

Also there's the horrid drawling sounds of Americaaaaaaan, or the lovely sound of Espanol, I know which I'd rather listen to all night.

Celeste (Celeste), Tuesday, 21 January 2003 23:00 (twenty-one years ago) link

If I go to Spain or Mexico I will be sure to move learn Spainsih, and become a citizen. If they are going to come here they should learn english and become citizens LIKE ALL THE OTHER IMMAGRINTS HAVE. Not learning english and not becoming a citizen does not make you an immagrint. It makes you an alien. Get it dumb shit?? I LIVE IN AMERICA AND DON'T HAVE TO LEARN SPANISH BECAUSE SOME DUMBSHITS CAN LEARN THE 1ST LANGUAGE. Are yall this ignorant or just this fucking stupid?? Especially that dumb ignorant bitch nickalicious.

I'm through with this thread quit wasting my time. Hertz is right.


, Tuesday, 21 January 2003 23:43 (twenty-one years ago) link

Don't let the door hit you on the ass.

Zen Clown (Zen Clown), Tuesday, 21 January 2003 23:46 (twenty-one years ago) link

Isn't it funny how you agree with the Hertz guy when you share the same IP. Really funny. Really, really funny. I mean funny.

Well, enjoy it bucko, you've not got many years before there will be more Spanish speakers in the U.S than English speakers. Sexy latin lovers here you come. Who knows maybe your grandkids will get swept off their feet at the prom by a latino love god / goddess. What a pleasing thought.

Lynskey (Lynskey), Wednesday, 22 January 2003 00:00 (twenty-one years ago) link

Suck my dick stupid cuntface.

, Wednesday, 22 January 2003 00:01 (twenty-one years ago) link

Hmm. I'm going to leave that one in. Touched a nerve there, obviously.

"Mary-Lou, I have something special for you"

"Oh Antonio, the prom has been so perfect . . . I've had such a wonderful time"

"Me too, Mary-Lou, me too"

"I'm so glad we managed to spend this time together even though my racist grandfather tried to stop us going together. He really can be trying . ."

"Oh, my sweet, he is just an old man clinging on to his old ideas. He is old and frail now, not like you you handsome latin stud"

"I know, I know, maybe we can get married and pack him off to an old folks home"

*giggles* "Oh Antonio!"

"Oh Mary-Lou"

Cue heavy 70's porn funk and intense sweaty pleasure

Or more likely -

"Maria-Lou, tengo algo especial para usted"

"Oh Antonio, el prom ha sido tan perfecto. . . He tenido una hora tan maravillosa "

"yo también, Maria-Lou, yo también"

"soy así que alegre manejamos pasar este vez junto aunque mi abuelo racist intentó pararnos que iban junto. Él realmente puede intentar.

"Oh, mi dulce, él es justo un viejo hombre que se aferra encendido en sus viejas ideas. Él es viejo y frágil ahora, no como usted usted perno prisionero latino hermoso "

"sé, yo sé, podemos conseguir casados y embalarlo quizá apagado a vieja gente a casa"

* ríe nerviosamente * el "Oh Antonio!"

"Oh Maria-Lou"

Lynskey (Lynskey), Wednesday, 22 January 2003 00:49 (twenty-one years ago) link

Actually, the real definition depends on where in the States you live— in the South (Bible-Belt, Right-Wing, Racist, Springtime-for-Hitler, Jerry-Springer-Fodder, American-Baptist-Taliban-yet-Strip-Club-on-Every-Corner home of Trent Lott), the dream is reliving the US Civil War and seceding from the rest of the States.

In the North, the dream is the South seceding from the rest of the States.

(I lived in the American South for five miserable years waiting for my company to transfer me back to someplace sane, so I know what I'm talking about.)


BTW, I'm American, Keweenaw Chippewa and Menominee, speak a smattering of a REAL FIRST LANGUAGE HERE, in addition to English (which was introduced after Spanish, Italian and French here), Spanish and French.

My grandparents weren't considered citizens of the US when they were born, even though they were born here. My grandmother was taken from her family when she was a child and put into a camp with other Indian children where she was 'Americanized.'

When I talk about my familial past, I'm sometimes asked if I hate this country. No— it's my country, I love it and I wouldn't want to live anywhere else. However, when one of these idiots like Mr. Little Cock starts spewing his swastikas, all I want to tell the fool is— GO BACK WHERE YOU CAME FROM.

We have a saying, "When the white man came to this country, there were no taxes, no unemployment and women did all the work. The white man thought he could improve this?"

No One (SiggyBaby), Wednesday, 22 January 2003 02:10 (twenty-one years ago) link

ZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ

An intellectual goldmine this site aint. Thanks for deleting "Anarchy." Dickhead.

, Wednesday, 22 January 2003 03:20 (twenty-one years ago) link

This is all a simple misunderstanding, Mr. Cock.
"Intellectual Goldmine" is over on Lusenet.

"All that glitters is not gold,
all those who wander are not lost
and all who can spell "intellectual" aren't."

Zen Clown (Zen Clown), Wednesday, 22 January 2003 04:32 (twenty-one years ago) link

"The Rio Grande covers most of the southern US"

Well, if you will insist on driving those big 'ol cars...

Matt (Matt), Wednesday, 22 January 2003 13:14 (twenty-one years ago) link

que dices?

AnAmerican (nickalicious), Wednesday, 22 January 2003 15:52 (twenty-one years ago) link

Canada looks better every day. Eh?

nickalicious (nickalicious), Wednesday, 22 January 2003 15:56 (twenty-one years ago) link

Hey Dick! Did your ancestors attempt learn any of the Native American languages when they travelled over to America in their ships, or was English difficult enough to master without adding anymore complications?

fractal (fractal), Wednesday, 22 January 2003 15:56 (twenty-one years ago) link

One good way to look at guy's like this: they're much less likely to find a partner with which to breed than regular humans.

nickalicious (nickalicious), Wednesday, 22 January 2003 15:57 (twenty-one years ago) link

Why do I speak Spanish better when drunk? Pienso que nosotros continuaríamos solamente como este, cuando hablando sobre este puto, verdad? Nota a Celeste— si tu quieres, si tu quieres.

No One (SiggyBaby), Wednesday, 22 January 2003 16:06 (twenty-one years ago) link

If I was going to leave America, I'd have to go somewhere that I could drive to. Airplanes smell funny and I don't like to travel without my chainsaw. I guess I'd go to Mexico. They have warm beaches
there and I've heard that Spanish is easier to learn than Canadian.

Zen Clown (Zen Clown), Wednesday, 22 January 2003 17:14 (twenty-one years ago) link

But the beer is better in Canada, eh?

When the first white explorers reached Lake Michigan, they asked their Indian guide what it was. Puzzled, he replied, “michi gami,” which means “big lake.”

No One (SiggyBaby), Wednesday, 22 January 2003 17:40 (twenty-one years ago) link

I don't think I've drank Canadian beer. I had a Corona once and it tasted like someone already drank it.
I aquired a taste for Guinness in Hong Kong. I hear it was created by mistake...
Some accidents work out for the best...then there's Mr. Cock...

Zen Clown (Zen Clown), Wednesday, 22 January 2003 18:41 (twenty-one years ago) link

You have to go to Canada to get the good stuff. The Canadian beer that’s imported is toned down in the belief that Americans can/won’t accept stronger-flavored beers. Labat is pretty good. Personally, I usually drink Guinness or Old Peculiar, although Chimay is still my favorite.

Strangely, Chimay was illegal where I lived in the South.

No One (SiggyBaby), Wednesday, 22 January 2003 18:51 (twenty-one years ago) link

Oh, man, now THAT'S what I miss about working in a five-star restaurant...the chef force-feeding me multiple Chimays at the end of every shift!

nickalicious (nickalicious), Wednesday, 22 January 2003 19:36 (twenty-one years ago) link

I don't understand beer being proscribed. I really don't.

Matt (Matt), Wednesday, 22 January 2003 20:07 (twenty-one years ago) link

Sous-chef?

“Su chef? No es mi chef. Tu le chinga— tu le traiga.”

No One (SiggyBaby), Wednesday, 22 January 2003 21:11 (twenty-one years ago) link

Proscription is very popular in "The Land of the Free".

Zen Clown (Zen Clown), Wednesday, 22 January 2003 21:29 (twenty-one years ago) link

Weak language puns! Now that's more like it! AAD finally back on track.

Matt (Matt), Thursday, 23 January 2003 11:45 (twenty-one years ago) link


Give me women, wine, and snuff
Until I cry out "hold, enough!"
You may do so sans objection
Till the day of resurrection:
For, bless my beard, they aye shall be
My beloved Trinity.

John Keats (1795-1821)

JS, Monday, 27 January 2003 14:14 (twenty-one years ago) link

Ode to Dick Hertz.

Give me forums, boards and bits
Until I cry out "fucking Brits!"
You may have some slight objections
You could be browsing Stile with huge erections :
For, I consider myself, as white, the cream
My beloved American Dream.

Lynskey (Lynskey), Monday, 27 January 2003 14:37 (twenty-one years ago) link

Now you've made me cry.

Zen Clown (Zen Clown), Monday, 27 January 2003 15:17 (twenty-one years ago) link

two weeks pass...
I am part german, and may be a little british too. But I now consider myself an american, I celebrate some costomes at home. But my ancestors have long been here. But I don't care if you're part kraut, you're still a dumb fuck. And I don't blame the brits for this countries problems or my own. I was just pointing out that they are usually asexual unless they are being homosexual.

I had an english teacher that said "Don't make up things that are not in the text." But you cuntface "liberals" just bull this shit out of the air or your dariere. This thread is about the american dream, not about you useless dumb shit democrats. Of course you would want to delete this thread, as the democratic party represents being anti intellectual. Freedom of speech does not involve politcal correctness.

I gotta take a dump but when Im done you can have fun an lick that rump.

Mike Hawk, Thursday, 13 February 2003 14:33 (twenty-one years ago) link

I should say enforcing political correctness involves no free speech. It sure involves no thinking. I think yuppies invented it and so they could try an make everyone as boring and untellectual as them.

You democrats really are insecure people. Go watch an episode of Seinfeld. You brain dead boring insecure lemmings!

I don't know of anything dumber than a liberal democrat.

Mike Hawk, Thursday, 13 February 2003 14:43 (twenty-one years ago) link

costomes
dariere
untellectual

Lynskey (Lynskey), Thursday, 13 February 2003 15:27 (twenty-one years ago) link

I think I’ve discovered the source of Mr. Angry’s animus— I believe that he’s a high school drop out whose lawn mowing business has failed due to a combination of price undercutting from the Mexican Landscaping Cartel, a broken lawnmower, and a lack of funds to replace said lawnmower due to his meth addiction.

No One (SiggyBaby), Thursday, 13 February 2003 15:50 (twenty-one years ago) link

And a lack of meths due to steenkeeng wetbacks drinking it all

Matt (Matt), Thursday, 13 February 2003 16:50 (twenty-one years ago) link

Typos.

Beileve it or not, there are some anger against the modern so called liberals in this country. Mexicans are not being done any favors by not being incouraged to learn english.

Sterotypes do not just pop out of the blue, they are all based on fact. The anger is not with mexicans want to become americans it's with ones who come here and don;t. And same with the arabs.

But liberals are very unintellecual. They need wetbacks to stay dirtbag no english speaking welfare cases to stay dependent on them. IF YOU DONT KNOW THE LANGUAGE GO THE FUCK BACK. But what can be done about the dumb shit democrats? Open season on their stupid asses.

Mike Hawk, Friday, 14 February 2003 02:42 (twenty-one years ago) link

unintellecual.

Lynskey (Lynskey), Friday, 14 February 2003 02:50 (twenty-one years ago) link

I would love to jump in here but in light of my recent admonishment I feel disinclined to do so.
My fondness for this forum drives me to do what I can for the best interest of all.
In light of that, I am retreating into self-exile.
I really wasn't "up to it" anyway, was I.

Zen Clown (Zen Clown), Friday, 14 February 2003 03:54 (twenty-one years ago) link

Neighbours is a towering edifice of television drama, one of the finest the world has ever seen. It can cover every emotion with a depth unrivalled by any programme, save, perhaps, "Doctors". Bathos, Pathos, gut-wrenching fear, bowel-shaking comedy, all human life is here, and so is Summer Hoyland.

Matt (Matt), Saturday, 15 February 2003 00:27 (twenty-one years ago) link

This is Summer Hoyland. I hope you meant someone else

JS, Saturday, 15 February 2003 19:19 (twenty-one years ago) link

I tried to move to Russia but they wouldn't give me a fuckin' job.

Bollard (Bollard), Saturday, 15 February 2003 21:14 (twenty-one years ago) link

I have been hoping for one of those, but have had to settle for an office job

Weebleman (StillSimon), Sunday, 16 February 2003 09:25 (twenty-one years ago) link

I'm sure the Russians have their own version of Neighbours with big boisterous Russian women who are a damn sight more masculine then those puny Aussie guys. The older occupants in Ramsinky Street could reminisce about the good old days when, if you didn't like your tedious, amnesiac neighbour you could have her promptly abducted in the middle of the night and removed to a brutal labour camp where her insidious cheerfulness could be appropriately dealt with.

Anna., Sunday, 16 February 2003 23:53 (twenty-one years ago) link

I meant Summer Hoyland the scheming evil robot child bent on the destruction of mankind. Who did you think I meant?

Matt (Matt), Sunday, 16 February 2003 23:56 (twenty-one years ago) link

State of play on this thread so far: Racist joke has mutated into meditations on what Australian soaps would be like if transplanted to Russia. I love Ask a Drunk.

Matt (Matt), Monday, 17 February 2003 00:12 (twenty-one years ago) link

I love I hate Ask A Drunk.

Lynskey (Lynskey), Monday, 17 February 2003 00:17 (twenty-one years ago) link

It is good. But it's no "I love Grammar"

Matt (Matt), Monday, 17 February 2003 00:19 (twenty-one years ago) link


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