Worst TV adverts of the moment

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have we talked about that phone ad that uses a horrible version of "Hangin' on the Telephone"?

― kingfish has gene rayburn's mic (kingfish 2.0), Wednesday, 8 February 2006 16:41 (eighteen years ago) link

It's a kangaroo, and it wears a chauffeur's cap. Why do the sheilas need motor insurance if they aren't even driving?

(I don't hate the Sheila's Wheels advert at all)

― ailsa (ailsa), Wednesday, 8 February 2006 23:17 (eighteen years ago) link

I miss the Elite Carpet Drycleaners Ghostbusters rip-off ads!

― marianna lcl (marianna lcl), Thursday, 9 February 2006 08:11 (eighteen years ago) link

(I don't hate the Sheila's Wheels advert at all)

These are the *best* adverts on at the moment:

"For bonza car insurance deals, girls get down to Sheila's wheels..."
"For ladies who enjoy their cars, Sheila's wheels are superstars..."

So damn catchy!

― Tehrannosaurus HoBB (the pirate king), Thursday, 9 February 2006 08:34 (eighteen years ago) link

I have a vision of Charlie Sheen sitting at a piano, writing the jingles for those ads.

― accentmonkey (accentmonkey), Thursday, 9 February 2006 10:26 (eighteen years ago) link

Bleugh and that breathe easy strips advert or whatever they are - "this is the exact size of your nasal passages when you have a cold - theyre not full of snot, its the veins in them exploding" or something like that. I feel physically sick especially when I'm eating tea in front of the telly. Sickening.

You forgot the worst bit. It goes something like:

[posh man with posh voice]: this is the exact size of your nasal passages when you have a cold - theyre not full of snot...

(Jump cut to posh mans mouth)

[same posh man putting on even posher voice]: YUCK!

[posh man back to normal posh voice]: its the veins in them exploding....

Truly infuriating.

― Chewshabadoo (Chewshabadoo), Thursday, 9 February 2006 10:33 (eighteen years ago) link

The low-fi ones like Cillit Bang and the consolidate-your-debts ones with people striding purposefully through call centres talking about CCJs – they're annoying but really well-made. Designed to give you the impression that these people are just like you and understand your needs (e.g. banks make me nervous, that place looks more friendly) and that they don't waste their customers' money on high tech marketing, they're down to earth you see. Scarily effective, apparently.

I did notice though that one of these ads featured about half a dozen redular members of the public, and EVERY ONE OF THEM was grotesquely obese. What can it mean??

― Markelby (Mark C), Thursday, 9 February 2006 10:43 (eighteen years ago) link

People need loans to fund their doughnut habits?

― beanz (beanz), Thursday, 9 February 2006 10:48 (eighteen years ago) link

Personally I rob people to fund mine. Seems easier.

― Markelby (Mark C), Thursday, 9 February 2006 10:51 (eighteen years ago) link

renault clio - that fucking girl thinks she's sooooooooo hot 'ooh nicole, papa, french cars, jean-paul satre, pffft!, the most romantic city in the world!' that and the stupid music dribbling past like some gallic weak orgasm. this advert could be responsible for shifting francophilia to francophobia in me. *yeeuch* shudder.

― john clarkson, Thursday, 9 February 2006 11:35 (eighteen years ago) link

You are called Jeremy and don't fool me!

― mark grout (mark grout), Thursday, 9 February 2006 11:40 (eighteen years ago) link

bang to rights guv - i'm that smug and that bald

― john clarkson, Thursday, 9 February 2006 11:50 (eighteen years ago) link

oh god i hate the 'gorgeous is...' car ad.

― The Man Without Shadow (Enrique), Thursday, 9 February 2006 11:52 (eighteen years ago) link

Me too. It just goes ON and ON and on AND on and on.

It's like a bad Calvin Klein ad from the early nineties.

― accentmonkey (accentmonkey), Thursday, 9 February 2006 11:56 (eighteen years ago) link

two months pass...

Dunkin Donuts - "Doing things is what I like to do...YES!" song

Make it stop!!

― Joe (Joe), Tuesday, 18 April 2006 11:34 (eighteen years ago) link

I loathe the crass sponsorship ads from Cadbury before Coronation Street and in particular the one with the grungy student type falling into a cardboard box while drinking tea out of a vase. What the fxxx is that about?

― Barry Scott, Monday, 24 April 2006 20:39 (seventeen years ago) link

I don't know if it's one of the worst or one of the best (for it's sheer improbability) but there's an ad for Kraft Cheese Crumbles which for music has a fake-EMF singing "They're Crumbelievable!" instead of "unbelievable." The guy singing sounds like he took the gig really seriously, too.
And what does "crumbelievable" mean, anyway? It's not really a pun. It doesn't really make sense as a slogan. I would pay $50 to be a fly on the wall during the creation and selling of this ad campaign.

-- Nemo (jdevereux...), January 20th, 2006 8:42 AM. (JND) (link)

I would've accused you of having hid in my living room last night were it not for the fact that you posted the above statement three months ago.

― Pleasant Plains /// (Pleasant Plains ///), Monday, 24 April 2006 20:50 (seventeen years ago) link

freaky

― sunny successor (katharine), Monday, 24 April 2006 22:09 (seventeen years ago) link

that pepsi commercial that looks like a car commercial, with the high pitched jingle that can annoy from several rooms away

― a.b. (alanbanana), Monday, 24 April 2006 22:31 (seventeen years ago) link

I want to kick the shitty pseudo-Austrailian guy in the Outback steakhouse commercials in the fucking teeth.

― joygoat (joygoat), Monday, 24 April 2006 23:27 (seventeen years ago) link

The new Daily Express advert with it's creepy fascist undertones. Actually made me go "OH FUCK OFF!" at my TV as the strapline came on at the end.

― Treblekicker (treblekicker), Tuesday, 25 April 2006 10:57 (seventeen years ago) link

There's one on just now for some kind of training company, ICS, it's got a really annoying woman saying "Want to learn at home for a new career but don't think you can do it? ICS you can!"

They think the line is so clever they make her say "ICS you can" about ten times in the one advert.

It makes me want to weep.

― Rumpie (lil drummer girl parumpumpumpu), Tuesday, 25 April 2006 11:42 (seventeen years ago) link

Treblekicker, what one's that?

The "did you feel something?" ad for Wilkinson Sword or whoever - razors seem to be the new chewing gum in unwatchable advert stakes.

― Markelby (Mark C), Tuesday, 25 April 2006 11:46 (seventeen years ago) link

Ha ha, yes that's terrible - esp. the inept dubbing!

― Kids Will Eat Them Till the Cows Come Home (Dada), Tuesday, 25 April 2006 11:47 (seventeen years ago) link

I surprised myself when I went off on an expletive-riddled tirade last night against the J Nesbitt one where he's on the phone rhapsodizing about his penis car when wifey says, "oh btw I'm pregnant," and cue the "let me call you back" and trying-to-cram-a-carseat in a 2-seater montage, then grimly phoning up about a papal carrier. As though by "pregnant" she meant "and with quints".

Combo of cliched corvette-owning jerk plus overstyled yuppie apt plus woman in role of smug manipulative killjoy really put me off! I think this is a commercial for insurance, but I'm not even sure of that.

― sgs (sgs), Tuesday, 25 April 2006 12:06 (seventeen years ago) link

also, "nutrisse means NOURISH!!!" ARGH

― sgs (sgs), Tuesday, 25 April 2006 12:11 (seventeen years ago) link

Manipulative wifey look slightly like Helen Baxendale (ie, "Rachel"). Coincedence?

― JTS (JTS), Tuesday, 25 April 2006 15:01 (seventeen years ago) link

express adverts viewable here: http://www.express.co.uk/videos.html

― koogs (koogs), Tuesday, 25 April 2006 15:15 (seventeen years ago) link

Did someone say Canesten? http://www.yeast.me.uk

― Gav, Monday, 1 May 2006 11:28 (seventeen years ago) link

FLOWMAX - drug for making old men not have to piss all the time. May result in reduced semen production, ya know. Anyway, great name for a drug that makes you NOT have to piss, Flowmax.

― dave's good arm (facsimile) (dave225.3), Tuesday, 2 May 2006 01:22 (seventeen years ago) link

am already fed up of football themed adverts and the WC doesn't start for over a month.

http://us.a1.yimg.com/us.yimg.com/a/ad/adidas/ukcountdown_220x85_122005.swf

― koogs (koogs), Tuesday, 2 May 2006 07:44 (seventeen years ago) link

"I think this is a commercial for insurance, but I'm not even sure of that."

I thought it was for the Yellow Pages...

Anyway, what about the latest Mini Baby Bell thing, with a central casting model woman (dressed like one of the Angels from Captain Scarlet) throwing some cheese out of a plane so some geeky, gropy skydivers leap out after them, but the geekiest one of all fails to catch his and it lands on a remote-control flatbed truck that an evil-looking Scandinavian boy drives away while cackling, forcing the parachutist to chase after it on foot through a giant concrete pipe only for his chute to get caught up in the pipe making him fall flat on his arse while the evil-looking Scandinavian boy eats the cheese and laughs even more madly than before?

What the fuck is that all about?

Meanwhile, Sheila's Wheels continues...

― Hello Sunshine (Hello Sunshine), Tuesday, 2 May 2006 07:50 (seventeen years ago) link

"Put de lime in de Coke, you nut...."

AAAAAAHHHHHHH!!!!

― hejira, Tuesday, 2 May 2006 13:40 (seventeen years ago) link

Immigration officer: How long have you been in Jamaica?

Dreadlocked white man: We bin hunnymoonin' 'bout fifteen years mon.

Me: So how come your passport hasn't expired?

― Hello Sunshine (Hello Sunshine), Thursday, 11 May 2006 06:03 (seventeen years ago) link

saw a meta-advert the other day, some branding company doing a 30-second infomercial for the (mind boggling in its own way) 3-fragrance ambi-pur thing (despite the fact that an advert for said air freshener already exists)

― koogs (koogs), Thursday, 11 May 2006 07:32 (seventeen years ago) link

The worst tv advert of the moment is clearly the Rennies one with the grumbling volcano. It feels like it was made circa 1978.

― Jerry the Nipper (Jerrynipper), Thursday, 11 May 2006 07:36 (seventeen years ago) link

Oh, oh, also the one - for some kind of flapjack? - with the two women fishing, and one of them calls an oven "the magic box". Abysmal.

― Jerry the Nipper (Jerrynipper), Thursday, 11 May 2006 07:39 (seventeen years ago) link

My least favourite ads are any of the ones they show on Paramount Comedy. Because I'm addicted to reruns of American sitcoms, I end up on this station a lot. It's annoying because
1) they always run the same ads for their programmes in every single ad break
2) they don't change these ads for a whole month
3) their ads are SO LOUD compared to the programmes
4) their ad breaks are so long. I think we timed one the other night at four minutes

I hate them.

― accentmonkey (accentmonkey), Thursday, 11 May 2006 08:23 (seventeen years ago) link

I really can't stand the sanitary towel advert with all the women marching in the streets. Grrrrrr.

― indolent girl (indolent girl), Thursday, 11 May 2006 08:26 (seventeen years ago) link

"My least favourite ads are any of the ones they show on Paramount Comedy"

Too right. How many times have they shown that promo for "Two and a Half Men" ??? The extent of Charlie Sheen's surgery makes me want to retch!!

― JTS (JTS), Thursday, 11 May 2006 21:37 (seventeen years ago) link

Oh, oh, also the one - for some kind of flapjack? - with the two women fishing, and one of them calls an oven "the magic box". Abysmal.

Totally otm. I've also been reduced to shouting at the telly recently by the jaffa cake advert with the woman stuck down a well and the new one for bogroll with some kind of balm on it ("I'm a bit of a clean freak" etc). Jebus, these are bad.

― Bill A (Bill A), Friday, 12 May 2006 09:52 (seventeen years ago) link

Applebee's has the worst commercials on earth. They make me want to kill.

― josh in sf (stfu kthx), Friday, 12 May 2006 16:42 (seventeen years ago) link

The Daily Mail "Free 'teach yourself Spanish' CD" one that's just been on. What Spanish phrase do they show someone saying to show how fluent in Spanish you'll be after buying their paper?

"Ti amo"

― Cressida Breem (neruokruokruokne?), Friday, 12 May 2006 17:46 (seventeen years ago) link

the Pepsi / XBox open top bus / victory parade thing.

― koogs (koogs), Tuesday, 16 May 2006 11:17 (seventeen years ago) link

Oh God, yes. It makes me feel sorry for Barry Davies, that he is reduced to such hackery.

― Jerry the Nipper (Jerrynipper), Tuesday, 16 May 2006 11:21 (seventeen years ago) link

"Be a high rate saver!"

― Ste (Fuzzy), Tuesday, 16 May 2006 11:31 (seventeen years ago) link

What about the one for some kind of snack that has people being thrown into a dungeon by some strange king-type chappie?

― Hello Sunshine (Hello Sunshine), Tuesday, 16 May 2006 11:37 (seventeen years ago) link

Not that I can see it down here, but I am reliably informed that the current ad campaign for the Scottish Daily Record is spectacularly abysmal. Confirmation?

― Marcello Carlin (nostudium), Tuesday, 16 May 2006 11:52 (seventeen years ago) link

Be A High-Rate Saver sung to the tune of Rhinestone Cowboy.

― koogs (koogs), Friday, 19 May 2006 08:18 (seventeen years ago) link

four weeks pass...

i quite like this Ford Focus ST advert I think. the one with weird things happening in a futuristing setting and is about kind of what you wanted to be in the future. i mean. it's alright.

anyway the point is that THEN there is another one by Zurich insurance "what happens" that talks also about the future, and how you can't predict weird things that happen. Uses an instrumental version of the same tune, and a few shots are inside a car! made me almost think it's the same advert until like right at the end it was like insurance wot!

co-incidence?

― ken c (ken c), Friday, 16 June 2006 11:16 (seventeen years ago) link

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