Lance Armstrong is a God

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If they legalize everything, I expect to see surgically-created human-animal hybrids before 2020.

Aimless, Friday, 18 January 2013 17:37 (five years ago) Permalink

as the link says, it's not necessarily that life-threatening if done *well*

the main issue with it would be that of access, and consequent unfairness when the bigger nations won the arms-race to develop the most effective chemicals, although extremely talented individuals from poorer nations will always find sponsorship

i'd foresee a breakaway 'clean' movement, and YOU, THE PEOPLE would choose which to follow, if either

that said, extend this to other sports and i begin to feel a trifle repulsed, so perhaps these are just my dismissive thoughts about athletics being projected

imago, Friday, 18 January 2013 17:37 (five years ago) Permalink

aimless, that would be amazing. see the human cheetah! only 7 farthings a view! for a fortnight only!

imago, Friday, 18 January 2013 17:38 (five years ago) Permalink

this is why when LA talks about how the era when he won the tours was "an even playing field", it's 100% bullshit.

bingo, but on the spectrum of "reprehensible things Lance Armstrong said during the Oprah interview" I don't think it places that high, he really came off badly in so many ways

frogbs, Friday, 18 January 2013 17:45 (five years ago) Permalink

Imago - aside from everything else where would the money come from? What brands would want to be associated with an openly 'dirty' cycling competition?

peligro, Friday, 18 January 2013 17:52 (five years ago) Permalink

well, that's where a 'clean' breakaway would form, with far more stringent testing

dunno, this narrative needs some work

imago, Friday, 18 January 2013 17:56 (five years ago) Permalink

But surely there would be more money in the 'clean' version so you would just get people spending big money to come up with ways to beat the tests/bully people into silence and win that one as there would be greater rewards.

peligro, Friday, 18 January 2013 18:02 (five years ago) Permalink

And then it'll be won a bunch of times by some guy called Bance Harmstong do u see

peligro, Friday, 18 January 2013 18:05 (five years ago) Permalink

maybe we shouldn't look up to sportspeople so much as paragons of human achievement or virtue, but as entertainers

imago, Friday, 18 January 2013 18:07 (five years ago) Permalink

idk this kinda kills me to write as I would like to believe in corinthian values, level playing-fields and the like

team sports don't bring out the cynic in me nearly so much - cycling and athletics are rigged games trying their damnedest to put on an outward show of cleanness and it's a shame because they can be extremely good fun to watch - they can carry with them the catharsis of sublime victory - but beneath it all is the drugs narrative and it puts me off

imago, Friday, 18 January 2013 18:10 (five years ago) Permalink

The PED testing done today, while not perfect, is incredibly more advanced than it was even say like 4 years ago... particularly in the chemical analysis regarding steroids, blood/oxygen-boosters, blood transfusions.

Hormone testing is much more sophisticated, but a lot of the masking agents are now easier to detect (FSchleck for example).

Jersey Al (Albert R. Broccoli), Friday, 18 January 2013 18:13 (five years ago) Permalink

A smirk smeared across his face, Armstrong wistfully recalls how he called Besty "crazy" and "a bitch."

Then, for one horrible moment, you can and watch Lance sit back "read the room."

Time for a little comedy.

"I did call her crazy….I did. I did. I think she'd be okay with me saying this, but…I'm gonna take the liberty to say it. [When we spoke on the phone recently,] I said 'Listen, I called you ‘crazy,' I called you ‘a bitch.' I called you all these things…but I never called you ‘fat.'"

Then, Armstrong pauses for laughter.

He pauses a little longer for laughter.

He waits and waits for the laughter to come, while the camera cuts to a brilliant shot of Oprah blinking at him, her eyelids heavy under the weight of gravitas.

"'Cause…" he begins. Maybe Oprah didn't get the joke? Maybe if he explains the joke it will become funny and he and Oprah will laugh and laugh and she'll scrap the whole interview and take him to OS-TRAIL-YAAAAA instead?

"…She thought I said ‘You are a fat, crazy bitch,'" he flails, reaching out for a lifesaver. Unfortunately Oprah's soul has already left her body; she floats above the room and watches him die.

"…And I said," he repeats "‘Betsy…I never said you were fat.'"

Okay, Oprah's done. She moves on.

christmas candy bar (al leong), Friday, 18 January 2013 19:14 (five years ago) Permalink

u_u

set the controls for the heart of the sun (VegemiteGrrl), Friday, 18 January 2013 19:16 (five years ago) Permalink

making a fat joke to oprah is just...alien behavior.

christmas candy bar (al leong), Friday, 18 January 2013 19:17 (five years ago) Permalink

these are the the things that make me feel okay for disliking him all these years. douche

set the controls for the heart of the sun (VegemiteGrrl), Friday, 18 January 2013 19:21 (five years ago) Permalink

He called her fat and ugly for the record.

Jersey Al (Albert R. Broccoli), Friday, 18 January 2013 19:24 (five years ago) Permalink

espn is really burying this story

christmas candy bar (al leong), Saturday, 19 January 2013 00:21 (five years ago) Permalink

at least on their website. 8th story down on the sidebar, below alvin gentry getting canned and tiger missing the cut.

christmas candy bar (al leong), Saturday, 19 January 2013 00:21 (five years ago) Permalink

lance armstrong on oprah: sort of like watching a play about the crucifixion?

Z S, Saturday, 19 January 2013 04:44 (five years ago) Permalink

but actor jesus reaaaally sucks

Z S, Saturday, 19 January 2013 04:45 (five years ago) Permalink

True Crime surely?

pandemic, Monday, 21 January 2013 16:27 (five years ago) Permalink

Sack Fat Pat

I hope everyone is aware of the mascot the World Road Championships organising comittee in tuscany chose this year. Very Appropriate

http://cycling-passion.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/10/UCI-Road-World-Championships-Toscana-Tuscany-2013-Symbol-Pinocchio-300x300.jpg

American Fear of Pranksterism (Ed), Tuesday, 29 January 2013 15:07 (five years ago) Permalink

that's perfect

well if it isn't old 11 cameras simon (gbx), Tuesday, 29 January 2013 15:22 (five years ago) Permalink

yeah, that's amazing.

EZ Snappin, Tuesday, 29 January 2013 15:23 (five years ago) Permalink

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vOxQ6aEWNJU

Confused Turtle (Zora), Saturday, 2 February 2013 14:13 (five years ago) Permalink

^^ that is not what it looks like. Watch out for the bit where his eyes flash and his wheels catch fire...

Confused Turtle (Zora), Saturday, 2 February 2013 14:14 (five years ago) Permalink

two months pass...

He's back!

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4q2QsqatfLA

Jesus H.

Ned Raggett, Sunday, 21 April 2013 16:18 (four years ago) Permalink

http://www.freesmileys.org/smileys/smiley-fc/drums.gif

markers, Sunday, 21 April 2013 16:57 (four years ago) Permalink

Bill Brock, Betsy Andreu and Greg & Kathy LeMond talk about doping http://new.livestream.com/ut-comm/events/2050748

you may not like it now but you will (Zora), Tuesday, 23 April 2013 12:17 (four years ago) Permalink

(It starts at about 40:00)

you may not like it now but you will (Zora), Tuesday, 23 April 2013 12:18 (four years ago) Permalink

one month passes...

So.....hey what's up?

Howard Stern welcomed comedienne April Macie back to his satellite radio show Monday morning, and Macie spilled the goods about a variety of topics, including the night that champion cyclist Lance Armstrong asked her to perform an extremely dirty sexual act on him in a hotel bathroom.

Macie said that she and a friend met Armstrong at a club in Los Angeles and then went back to his Peninsula hotel room to party with some friends. When Macie stepped into the bathroom, though, she bore witness to a very different kind of party than the one she had expected.

"I went to use the bathroom, and I went in and Lance was bent over a bathtub and she was just face deep in his a**hole...I was terrified. And then he came out and said: ‘Does your friend want in on a round too?’ and I was like: 'Of taint tickling? I’m gonna take a pass'..I think it’s hilarious that he would ask without even knowing my first name—to eat his a**hole. Like: ‘Do you want in on a round too? Of **hole eating?...I got pretty for the evening. I didn’t know he was going to ask me to eat his asshole later on.”

Macie said that the incident happened "five or six years ago," long before Armstrong was hit with the brunt of the massive drug scandal in which he was accused of using steroids to win seven consecutive Tour de France titles from 1999-2005. In January 2013, Armstrong finally admitted to the doping allegations after years of denying them.

unfinest DN (upper mississippi sh@kedown), Thursday, 23 May 2013 12:07 (four years ago) Permalink

finally, evidence that armstrong may be human

set the controls for the heart of the sun (VegemiteGrrl), Thursday, 23 May 2013 17:35 (four years ago) Permalink

sorry

set the controls for the heart of the sun (VegemiteGrrl), Thursday, 23 May 2013 17:35 (four years ago) Permalink

one year passes...

ASPEN, Colo. -- Authorities say disgraced cyclist Lance Armstrong hit two parked cars after a night of partying in Aspen but agreed to let his girlfriend take the blame to avoid national attention.

mookieproof, Tuesday, 3 February 2015 19:03 (three years ago) Permalink

agreed to let his girlfriend take the blame agreed to let his girlfriend take the blame agreed to let his girlfriend take the blame agreed to let his girlfriend take the blame agreed to let his girlfriend take the blame agreed to let his girlfriend take the blame agreed to let his girlfriend take the blame agreed to let his girlfriend take the blame

Aimless, Tuesday, 3 February 2015 19:10 (three years ago) Permalink


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