ANNOUNCEMENT - CALL FOR PITCHES - MAX AND LAMP FILM PRODUCTION COMPANY LLC

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Also, Caek, NRQ has more connections to B's ME than I do :P and I am intrigued about your film. One day you must let me have a peek!

Lester Jackson, Wednesday, 4 February 2009 12:18 (fifteen years ago) link

Btw, I am so serious about MY one ima googleproof it too:

A psychedelic, maybe even slightly rotoscoped modern adaptation of S1gmund Fr3ud's PLOT SYNOPSIS (not analysis) of J3ns3n's "Gr4div4". It's a tripped-out psychological love-story that could leave Eternal Sunshine in the dust if done right, all fucked-up mental psychogeography and deep-seated unconscious obsession. Bunuel's directing-style should have an influence, and there will be plenty of incidental "environment" shots. Most of the film will be set among the modern ruins of P0mpeii, so blistering Mediterranean sunshine and heat-warped senses will be portrayed through hyper-realisation of lighting effects.

Lester Jackson, Wednesday, 4 February 2009 12:27 (fifteen years ago) link

Working title: Sno Globe
Targeted release: Late Spring 2010

Workout fanatic and single mom Liberty Chase (the girl from Transformers) manages a small gift boutique in Valencia. One morning while dropping her kid (blonde, a boy) off at a school a group of thugs attempts to kidnap her. Using her skills developed as an Olympic gymnast she escapes but they manage to snatch her kid. Meanwhile LAPD detective Frank Joe (someone tough) is inches away from nailing the case against druglord 'Bent' Martinez (latino dude from ice age). But 'Bent' has plans of his own, including putting whoever is importing coke in novelty sno globes "on ice".

What follows is a realtime threeway thriller in which Liberty races against time to rescue her son from the murky underworld and uncover some brutal truths about L.A., the company she works for and herself. The old man from Babe stars as Senator Thorton Kincaid III

Lamp, Wednesday, 4 February 2009 14:41 (fifteen years ago) link

do you have the option nrq?

― caek, Tuesday, February 3, 2009 5:41 PM (Yesterday) Bookmark Suggest Ban Permalink

yeah right.

need some SEED MONEY from messrs max and lamp to get this mofo moving.

special guest stars mark bronson, Wednesday, 4 February 2009 14:44 (fifteen years ago) link

After watching Frost/Nixon, came up with the idea for:

Sports movie set in the world of pro darts, following the paths taken through a PDC-esque tournament taken by two players: one a brash, cocky, Front magazine kinda guy, porkpie hat, shoelaceless Converse, alt.porn girlfriend, Spungenite girlfriend. The other a broken down one time "nearly man" of the sport who just lost his day job on a production line after a Gran Torino-style meltdown at Polish/Kosovan/Iraqi (change depending on vilified minority group of the day) coworkers. The extended idea is that the tournament effectively represents a fight for the battle of the white British working class.

Limoncello Carlin (The stickman from the hilarious "xkcd" comics), Wednesday, 4 February 2009 14:55 (fifteen years ago) link

working title: "Dart Attack"

max, Wednesday, 4 February 2009 14:57 (fifteen years ago) link

Arrow and Wealdstone

^^^britishes gag

Limoncello Carlin (The stickman from the hilarious "xkcd" comics), Wednesday, 4 February 2009 14:57 (fifteen years ago) link

Flight of Fantasy ("flights" are the correct name for the little sticky out bits on darts!)

Limoncello Carlin (The stickman from the hilarious "xkcd" comics), Wednesday, 4 February 2009 14:58 (fifteen years ago) link

Jolly Oche Sticks

america is the only _______ that _______ (country matters), Wednesday, 4 February 2009 15:00 (fifteen years ago) link

Sports movie set in the world of pro darts, following the paths taken through a PDC-esque tournament taken by two players: one a brash, cocky, Front magazine kinda guy, porkpie hat, shoelaceless Converse, alt.porn girlfriend, Spungenite girlfriend. The other a broken down one time "nearly man" of the sport who just lost his day job on a production line after a Gran Torino-style meltdown at Polish/Kosovan/Iraqi (change depending on vilified minority group of the day) coworkers. The extended idea is that the tournament effectively represents a fight for the battle of the white British working class.

i like this, but why not set it in the music section of a broadsheet newspaper?

special guest stars mark bronson, Wednesday, 4 February 2009 15:00 (fifteen years ago) link

one a brash, cocky, Front magazine kinda guy, porkpie hat, shoelaceless Converse, alt.porn girlfriend, Spungenite girlfriend

mike skinner in his film debut

The other a broken down one time "nearly man" of the sport who just lost his day job on a production line after a Gran Torino-style meltdown at Polish/Kosovan/Iraqi (change depending on vilified minority group of the day) coworkers

ray winstone gunning for an oscar

max, Wednesday, 4 February 2009 15:02 (fifteen years ago) link

If the film had been made 40 years earlier, Peter Vaughan would be a lock for the latter role. Maybe he could play his father?

Limoncello Carlin (The stickman from the hilarious "xkcd" comics), Wednesday, 4 February 2009 15:05 (fifteen years ago) link

maybe one of you can work up an idea i've got about a young woman who works as a tv psychic who discovers she actually IS psychic maybe right after her longtime bf breaks up with her? i'm thinking it's a slightly bawdy but heartfelt and smart comedy

Lamp, Wednesday, 4 February 2009 15:06 (fifteen years ago) link

of-our-time harrowing many POV drama following separate-yet-linked psycho killing sprees worldwide due to the making public of an internet secret message board. directing style: that one movie with salma hayek, or maybe 24. starring the kid from star wars internet clip, jeff goldblum as some school counsellor, and cameo appearance from HOOS as a hotel worker that just can't take it anymore(possibly channelling michael douglas in 'falling down', but would welcome any input the actor could bring into the role).

Redknapp out (darraghmac), Wednesday, 4 February 2009 15:08 (fifteen years ago) link

Working Title: Untitled [Is there a semi-classic Motown song about being psychic that we could use here? **Assign intern to research]
Release Date: Valentine's Day 2010

Anne Stanley (Amy Adams) has spent most of her life telling people what they want to hear. As Chicago's most popular TV psychic, she's gained popularity by predicting good fortune and cheer to her thousands for viewers. But when one of her predictions results in the death of a retired fireman (too heavy? needs to be focus grouped), the city turns against her and she loses her job, her boyfriend Charles (Josh Lucas), and her apartment all in one night. Wandering the chilly Chicago streets well after midnight, she's struck by lightning, and, upon waking, discovers that she actually can see the future--with hilarious results! But even as she profits (in more ways than one, wink wink) from her newfound powers, she foresees a terrible disaster--a mega-tornado coming to wreak havoc over the city! There's just one problem: no one believes her--except for the sexy fireman grandson (Grey's Anatomy's "McSteamy") of the man she inadvertently killed! The odd-couple pair must race against time--and against their growing attraction to one another--to save Chicago! The movie ends with Anne losing her psychic powers, and maybe being pregnant.

max, Wednesday, 4 February 2009 15:17 (fifteen years ago) link

notes: needs cameo by miss cleo as one of anne stanleys sucker clients - a post credits scene hinting that her baby is psychic

ice cr?m, Wednesday, 4 February 2009 15:20 (fifteen years ago) link

obv. discovering-powers scene is followed by upbeat montage of her using her powers, with sexy/fun results

max, Wednesday, 4 February 2009 15:22 (fifteen years ago) link

Suggested soundtrack for montage: "Magical Mystery Tour" covered by (research available powerpop acts, are Click Five still going?)

Limoncello Carlin (The stickman from the hilarious "xkcd" comics), Wednesday, 4 February 2009 15:23 (fifteen years ago) link

The movie is set in Los Angeles, a city with a cultural mix of every nationality. The story begins when several people are involved in a multi-car accident. From that point, we are taken back to the day before the crash, seeing the lives of several characters, and the problems each encounters during that day. An LAPD cop is trying to get medical help for his father, but he is having problems with a black HMO clerk who won't give his father permission to see another doctor. He in turn takes out his frustration on a black couple during a traffic stop. A socialite and District Attorney are carjacked at gunpoint by two black teenagers. She takes out her anger on a Mexican locksmith who is changing the door locks to their home. Later that night, the locksmith is again robbed of his dignity by a Persian store-owner. Many of the characters switch from being bad-person-to-hero in ways that may surprise you.

k3vin k., Wednesday, 4 February 2009 15:26 (fifteen years ago) link

hey kevin? thanks for your "contribution" but maybe you missed this part of the original post:

this is not a joke

max, Wednesday, 4 February 2009 15:27 (fifteen years ago) link

But when one of her predictions results in the death of a retired fireman (too heavy? needs to be focus grouped), the city turns against her and she loses her job

suggested alternate career for the dead fireman: dead beloved weatherman? it would also add to the fun with the killer tornado, etc etc

Mr. Que, Wednesday, 4 February 2009 15:27 (fifteen years ago) link

hopefully we can get some big name actors on this project. maybe if none likes the script we can get an action star and a rapper to play 'serious' roles

xxp lol sry :/

k3vin k., Wednesday, 4 February 2009 15:27 (fifteen years ago) link

Death of local "groundhog" style weather predicting animal?

Limoncello Carlin (The stickman from the hilarious "xkcd" comics), Wednesday, 4 February 2009 15:29 (fifteen years ago) link

why not death of weatherman AND groundhog--perfect since movie is set in february... maybe we bump release date up to groundhog's day?

max, Wednesday, 4 February 2009 15:31 (fifteen years ago) link

hay max yr a mod now maybe kevin needs a yellow card - just sayin - ill leave that up to u

ice cr?m, Wednesday, 4 February 2009 15:34 (fifteen years ago) link

i like that - preemptive mrkting really get the jump on some of the other vday rom coms - also i think we could work in a couple of scenes with her friends idk who's hot but i was thinking maybe asian. and i like the idea of her mom being played by holly hunter, earthy but straight-shooting and it gives the audience a positive perspective on our heroine even when everyone else is against her

Lamp, Wednesday, 4 February 2009 15:35 (fifteen years ago) link

maybe--mom is dead? but we get flashback scenes of her mom giving her advice--or holly hunter voiceovers--moms advice?

max, Wednesday, 4 February 2009 15:39 (fifteen years ago) link

i like hot minority friend, but lets make it maya rudolph, i cant think of any asian actresses, sandra oh too old, for examaple

max, Wednesday, 4 February 2009 15:40 (fifteen years ago) link

also lets get some local chi-town personalities to cameo--then really do a big chicago mkting push

max, Wednesday, 4 February 2009 15:41 (fifteen years ago) link

maybe--mom is dead? but we get flashback scenes of her mom giving her advice--or holly hunter voiceovers--moms advice?

― max, Wednesday, February 4, 2009 10:39 AM (2 minutes ago) Bookmark Suggest Ban Permalink

infer that mom was psychic

ice cr?m, Wednesday, 4 February 2009 15:42 (fifteen years ago) link

q: sexy fireman too obvious? what about--sexy journalist? sexy photographer?

max, Wednesday, 4 February 2009 15:43 (fifteen years ago) link

if we can't get mcdreamy on board mcconaughey could do a job, i feel.

Redknapp out (darraghmac), Wednesday, 4 February 2009 15:44 (fifteen years ago) link

narciss1st1c sc/3nt1st c1one5 se1f, b3c0m3s hi5 0wn w1f3

Dr Morbius, Wednesday, 4 February 2009 15:48 (fifteen years ago) link

smells like an rdj vehicle to me morbs

max, Wednesday, 4 February 2009 15:49 (fifteen years ago) link

i feel like morbs can help the direction of this thread--glad he's here

Mr. Que, Wednesday, 4 February 2009 15:50 (fifteen years ago) link

how about sexy weather related photog--still could be matt mcc

Mr. Que, Wednesday, 4 February 2009 15:51 (fifteen years ago) link

sexy storm chaser?

max, Wednesday, 4 February 2009 15:51 (fifteen years ago) link

^^ i like this b/c its like--he believes her b/c hes a tornado expert--but hates her because she killed his grandfather--but then they fall in love

max, Wednesday, 4 February 2009 15:52 (fifteen years ago) link

ooooooooooooooooooooooooh yes yes yes--love it

Mr. Que, Wednesday, 4 February 2009 15:52 (fifteen years ago) link

or not his grandfather--maybe his mentor?!

max, Wednesday, 4 February 2009 15:52 (fifteen years ago) link

beloved weatherman Dale Rooney?

max, Wednesday, 4 February 2009 15:52 (fifteen years ago) link

this might seem like a joke but bear with me because it is serious:

two guys on the internet start a "joke" film production company and are flooded with pitches. however, when they receive a brilliant pitch they actually decide to put the movie into production, launching them into a satirical view of today's hollywood. the brilliant pitch is that they make a movie about two guys on the internet who start a joke film production company and then decide to actually make one of their pitches into a movie, launching them into a satirical view of today's hollywood. you can get various internet "celebrities" to play themselves to appeal to the dorks, and also dip into the "get shorty"/"the player" world of getting celebrities to play self-mocking exaggerated versions of themselves (celebrities love doing this) - like you could get christian bale to freak out and yell at somebody and then wink at the camera.
the movie is called "meta" or, if you want to get edgy, "clusterf*ck."

congratulations (n/a), Wednesday, 4 February 2009 15:54 (fifteen years ago) link

starring seth rogan and michael cera

congratulations (n/a), Wednesday, 4 February 2009 15:56 (fifteen years ago) link

"charlie kaufman meets kevin smith" is how id pitch that, good work n/a

max, Wednesday, 4 February 2009 15:58 (fifteen years ago) link

remake of Jeanne Dielman, only it's a male record store clerk in Cambridge MA

Dr Morbius, Wednesday, 4 February 2009 16:02 (fifteen years ago) link

directed by guy maddin right dr maobius??

Lamp, Wednesday, 4 February 2009 16:04 (fifteen years ago) link

hahahaha n/a + max

america is the only _______ that _______ (country matters), Wednesday, 4 February 2009 16:12 (fifteen years ago) link

would watch n/a movie.

Redknapp out (darraghmac), Wednesday, 4 February 2009 16:14 (fifteen years ago) link

ww 09

Redknapp out (darraghmac), Wednesday, 4 February 2009 16:14 (fifteen years ago) link

xxxp: no Lamp, wrong rhythm for Guy; get a mumblecore guy

Dr Morbius, Wednesday, 4 February 2009 16:15 (fifteen years ago) link

i dont know what the pitch is, but i do know the tagline is 'based on a true reddit post'

― kill yuppies (Lamp), Wednesday, February 20, 2013 7:13 PM (1 month ago)

bump.

ְ֮֠֓֟֬֩ (gr8080), Thursday, 18 April 2013 15:34 (eleven years ago) link

eight months pass...

guys we really should have been on this first:

http://i.imgur.com/bJkITn8.jpg

|$̲̅(̲̅ιοο̲̅)̲̅$̲̅| (gr8080), Sunday, 5 January 2014 21:38 (ten years ago) link

wow i loved space jam

lag∞n, Sunday, 5 January 2014 21:42 (ten years ago) link

two months pass...

NSFW: http://gawker.com/the-chris-christie-gangbang-sex-tape-that-wasnt-nsfw-1543352886

During the course of this research, he read somewhere that some mob families would occasionally initiate new members by forcing them to engage in acts of group sex (generally multiple male partners on one woman), and filming them. The idea, I guess, is a "team building" exercise that could also serve as a convenient blackmail tool if the need for leverage were to arise.

working title: "Just one of the Gang"

three schlubby would-be mob underlings and best friends in 1980's new jersey find themselves forced to have sex on camera with the same woman to show allegiance to a powerful mob family. but what happens when we discover one of them is a virgin and another falls in love with her? will stage fright get them before The Family does? find out in this raucous campy sex comedy.

i'm thinking alexandra daddario in the female lead and we're in talks with jody hill to direct

°ㅇ๐ْ ° (gr8080), Wednesday, 19 March 2014 16:33 (ten years ago) link

http://i.imgur.com/DG8jzYa.jpg

lag∞n, Wednesday, 19 March 2014 16:51 (ten years ago) link

jimmy fallon and adam sandler make cameos as capos (in fat suits, obv)

°ㅇ๐ْ ° (gr8080), Wednesday, 19 March 2014 18:55 (ten years ago) link

six months pass...

Kickstarter for a movie in which Ben Savage runs a Kickstarter promising a 'Boy Meets World' movie but runs off with the cash

― ILX preorders SPYRO for Playstation (Sufjan Grafton), Thursday, September 25, 2014 5:50 PM (2 days ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

╲╱\/╲/\╱╲╱\/\ (gr8080), Sunday, 28 September 2014 01:43 (nine years ago) link

one year passes...

michael j fox goes back in time to 1940 to kill hitler. while fleeing from hitler youth bullies, fox accidentally runs over his grandfather joachim von ribbentrop on his bike. ribbentrop is hospitalized and, in his absence, his lookalike grandson is mistaken for him and finds himself in a negotiation with a molotov-led soviet delegation. fox and molotov hit it off over their mutual love of baseball and, before he realizes what he has done, fox has brought the soviet union into the axis. fox looks at a photo of a bagel in his wallet and realizes it is gradually disappearing. time is running out for fox to convince hitler to launch operation barbarossa.

Roberto Spiralli, Monday, 9 November 2015 20:39 (eight years ago) link

four months pass...

i had a terrible romantic comedy idea last night.

Two lovers register to be organ donors. Tragically they both die at a young age. Their eyes (or corneas, at least, although if this took place in the near future maybe it would be the entire eye) are transplanted into two other people, strangers, who of course run into each other on the street, look into each others' eyes, and fall in love at first sight. BUT, they really don't get along with each other and soon break up. but soon after, one of them is trapped in a fire and the other one happens to be there and saves their life. they get back together and this time have a child. but the old personality conflicts return as the realities of a dead-end job and extended postpartum depression set in. they go through marriage counseling, and it turns out the counselor was the former doorman for the apartment where the original eye donors briefly lived. he recognizes their eyes, but he can't say anything because it turns out that he was secretly in love with one of the donators. and looking at those corneas again, all these years later, he realizes he's still in love with her. he can never bring himself to say anything about it, but he does successfully sabotage their marriage. later they run into each other at a bar and he tries to see if there's a spark there between them, but there really isn't much there. he's very drunk, and ends up telling her that he sabotaged their marriage, not through anything that he said per se, but definitely by not saying what he should have said in his marriage counselor role. the eye donation receivers once again get back together, but this time they begin fighting from the first instant they reunite. they fight and fight, but by this time they're pretty old and there's little chance of finding anyone else out there and they'd rather not be alone, so they just stay together and talk about their eyeballs.

― Karl Malone, Wednesday, March 2, 2016 4:41 PM (1 week ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

gr8080, Thursday, 10 March 2016 16:59 (eight years ago) link

Ah god that's amazing

Ecomigrant gnomics (darraghmac), Thursday, 10 March 2016 17:02 (eight years ago) link

lol

lag∞n, Thursday, 10 March 2016 17:17 (eight years ago) link

damn from a doorman to a marriage counselor, good for him

johnny crunch, Thursday, 10 March 2016 17:20 (eight years ago) link

eternal sunshine of the spotless retina

Laertiades (imago), Thursday, 10 March 2016 17:23 (eight years ago) link

someone give me $300 and i'll make it. making a film can't be that hard, you just grab a camera and point a light at people, let them talk, do a little editing, close up of an eyeball, there's nothing to it

Karl Malone, Thursday, 10 March 2016 17:24 (eight years ago) link

L.A. Jetee

Laertiades (imago), Thursday, 10 March 2016 17:26 (eight years ago) link

splicing up eyeballs

gr8080, Thursday, 10 March 2016 18:39 (eight years ago) link

im working on film script abt corporate espionage in the pharmaceutical industry

extremely online (Lamp), Thursday, 10 March 2016 23:18 (eight years ago) link

i like yr idea though z_s

extremely online (Lamp), Thursday, 10 March 2016 23:18 (eight years ago) link

one year passes...

hows the script coming Lamp

johnny crunch, Wednesday, 4 October 2017 17:00 (six years ago) link


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