Innocuous things that make you irrationally embarrassed

no schmoffense taken

Old Lunch OTM. I want to punch whoever wrote that "jazz" "etiquette" piece. Any guidance beyond "listen" is suspect.

i'm embarrassed on the behalf of the person who wrote it
how boring and uncomfortable it must be to be that person

was taught in middle school that one applauds a jazz solo and one does not applaud between movements of an orchestral work

jazz is kind of embarrassing overall

Irrational fear of buying toilet paper, especially in high quantities. It's never Happened, but I keep fearing the store clerk that will wrinkle his brow, look at me with a broad grin, and ask "So, Poopin tonight, eh?".

― NINO CARTER, Wednesday, December 19, 2012 5:18 PM (1 hour ago) Bookmark

Avoid this situation by requesting toilet paper anytime a flatmate/friend asks if you want anything from the shop. It really pisses people off

I used to be the designated toilet paper buyer for the shared house I lived in, and I had absolutely no fear about rocking up to the supermarket checkout with two jumbo 9 roll packs.

Then I'd have to hide like four rolls in my room, so that we didn't suddenly run out.

I'm super-awkward about making appointments and scheduling maintenance in my home. Toilet paper buying, not really.

i was once designated to purchase tampons -- as i was scanning the shelves looking for the correct item, a woman hi-fived me

(this was not embarrassing, just unusual)

aw

hearing people, usually drunk, talk in fake english accents.

Yeah, unless you're, like, fourteen and buying them for your mom, I never understood the embarrassment of buying tampons as a dude. I mean, clearly they aren't for you. Unless it's some gynophobic thing I don't get because I'm not Macho.

Someone I like posted an email to the entire department asking them to vote for her in some online competition.

If it had been someone I don't like I'd be straight to the stupid annoying coworkers thread but as it is I'll just have to feel embarrassed.

I think it's supposed to threaten your masculinity in some way or your self image by associating yourself with products that are not for men or indicate you may be pooping, a time when you would be vulnerable to attack. x-p

It's just misogyny, y'all.

I always thought I was violating the sanctity of some secret female aisle.

But hey, it wasn't me that stocked the diapers there.

how can I know when jazz is occurring?

http://thestockmasters.com/files/images/story-images/hannibal-a-team.jpg

when hannibal is around

Cosby had good taste in Jazz iirc

http://25.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_lp1wdhYlyq1r00k3po1_r2_500.gif

http://d2tq98mqfjyz2l.cloudfront.net/image_cache/1313252609743540.gif

Sorry. "cosby show dance gif" may be the best Google search results ever.

omg

http://24.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_logxw2QbRO1r03vjuo1_250.gif

wau

Thanking u

okay one more

http://25.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_lx958nQ3jv1qaboh9o1_500.gif

it'll be embarrassing when my mom gives me that sweater for xmas

It'll be less embarrassing if you dance in it.

I would wear that sweater.

It's pretty cool that one man can become an icon for a very specific type of ugly sweater.

I'm a little irrationally embarrassed by my sudden overwhelming feelings of affection toward Bill Cosby.

Whooee feelings are even more embarrassing than bodies, imo.

even pleated pants work on bill cosby

In Britain, there are two '80s US sweater icons: Cos and Casey Kasem.

are they called jumper icons?

xp don't forget Noel Edmonds.
Actually, wait...
Forget Noel Edmonds

xp to LL - Oh, speaking of bodies, I was going to offer a long post in solidarity with your "chewing" embarrassment, but never got around to it, but chewing gets to me, too. So does any situation where I'm expected to stand and eat and socialize. I usually just don't eat, which is how I end up wasted at work parties.

EATING AND SOCIALIZING IS NOT INNOCUOUS

(But yes, embarrassing)

The standing is a crucial component. I can eat with other people in a social setting, but being expected to stand and talk and hold a drink and a napkin full of mini-quiche ugh. I'm always so focused on getting my hands free that I stuff whatever it is in my mouth and then I'm chewing like a cow and that's always when somebody says, "So, carl agatha, how's that big case coming?"

Then I have to do the universal symbol for "I acknowledge you but do not want to talk with my mouth full" and suddenly everybody is watching me chew and I've got the added pressure of wondering whether what I have to say in response is going to make everybody annoyed that they stood there waiting and watching me chew. It's just the worst.

you ppl with your fancy work parties

Work parties at my new job are super fancy! And plentiful. I could have attended four holiday parties had I been so inclined (I was not).

you ppl with your fancy work

Standing and eating doesn't leave my hands free to applaud after a solo.

Just get a straw and blow bubbles

I'm a little irrationally embarrassed by my sudden overwhelming feelings of affection toward Bill Cosby.

YES. I hadn't thought of him really in a while and seeing him make crazy faces gave me huge nostalgic flashbacks. My cousin and I watched "Bill Cosby Himself" like a hundred times on HBO at my grandmother's house when I was a kid.

As for the sweaters this is one of my favorite things in the world: http://www.geekosystem.com/cosby-regression-sweater/

Amazing.

I remember watching Himself at a slumber party and LOLing my head off. My dad had a Bill Cosby comedy record (with the bit about him saving a snowball in the freezer) and I would put on my dad's big old 70s can headphones and listen to that record and laugh and laugh.

hearing people, usually drunk, talk in fake english accents.

― akm, Wednesday, December 19, 2012 2:03 PM (1 hour ago)

i watched a friend's play (another embarrassing situ) that was done entirely like this

It is embarrassing watching someone pretend to be drunk and doing a terrible job of it (whether IRL or in theater).