The Anthony Bourdain thread

No.

I like A.B., from what I'v read. And I totally support Nice Guys in the Military, but I support neither the gov't nor the "military."

Also, Dan's right -- I've spent some time in commercial kitchens, and he pretty much nails it.

When I first read Kitchen Confidential I loved it because it showed the Way It Really Is. Now I hate Bourdain because he is an example of The Way It Really Is. He is just the sort of macho, self-aggrandizing, control freak that plagues too many restaurant and makes life miserable for the rest of the staff including waiters, managers, cooks, runners, bussers, and even owners.

I think my breaking point was when I saw Bourdain on The Restaurant, dining at Rocco's in NY with another chef, talking some crap about "Chefs embody madmen, visionaries and artists, all in one body..." as the camera spun and zoomed giddily about them. Blarf.

That said, I have never tasted Bourdain's food, and from what I have heard he's a good, workmanlike chef but not a truly special one. He seems to know his French comfort food, which is still better than what most of America ever eats.

But whatever, he's not even a chef anymore, he's a full-time writer and TV personality. Fuck TV -- he's a professional personality. I happen to like this personality. Some will not.

So I like Bourdain, but only when he is eating durian.

The fish tip doesn't hold true right across the board though, where I work we sell out of stuff over the weekend, so a fresh fish delivery arrives on Monday.

maybe this is why Friday has always =ed "fish day"?

"is everybody happy? well i should say!"

At my former workplace (an upscale fish restaurant) deliveries came in fresh every day except Sunday. And they weren't frozen. And this was in Chicago.

Monday had very fresh fish since we ran out of a lot of stuff on Sunday.

So, suck, Bourdain.

No.

Evan, half the people on this thread also post on the Chicago thread. QED.

I wonder why Les Halles and Bourdain would order that way. If weekends are amateur nights, wouldn't you want to serve the amateurs the 2nd rate stuff and have fresh seafood for your more discerning patrons?

(I grant that this is complete speculation about a business that I am not running, but still.)

So did Steve Shasta upthread!

I think it's worth pointing out that in our kitchen we're all very polite to each other, and even to the floor staff for that matter. That said, I like Bourdain. He loves food, and that's what it's all about.

haha!

He's turning into a hippy with each new season/show though.

Any thoughts on The Nasty Bits, his newest book, a collection of magazine pieces? Enjoyed it, especially the endnotes where he cops to where he was wrong in each.

He rocks.

Well, his marriage fell apart because he was traveling all the time. He was not happy about that.

"I want a maple bacon doughnut."

OR

"I feel like I've been fisting Shamu the killer whale."

And I get to seethe about how much I hate Bourdain, even though I've never read a word he's written or seen him on TV. It wouldn't surprise me to learn that ILX invented him so that certain posters had an arrogant semi-celebrity to fashion themselves after.

(xpost: I think he's saying that he has issues with a personality type that he imagines both AB and certain ILXors to represent, whether or not they in fact do)

NOBODY ASKED ME, BUT……
By Anthony Bourdain

I actually WATCH Food Network now and again, more often than not drawn in by the progressive horrors on screen. I find myself riveted by its awfulness, like watching a multi-car accident in slow motion. Mesmerized at the ascent of the Ready-Made bobblehead personalities, and the not-so-subtle shunting aside of the Old School chefs, I find myself de-constructing the not-terrible shows, imagining behind the scenes struggles and frustrations, and obsessing unhealthily on the Truly Awful ones. Screaming out loud at Sandra Lee in disbelief as she massacres another dish, then sits grinning, her face stretched into a terrifying rictus of faux cheer for the final triumphant presentation. I mourn for Mario..and Alton...Bobby and yes--even Emeril, nobly holding the fort while the TV empire he helped build crumbles like undercooked Bundt cake into a goo of Cheez Wiz around him.

Some thoughts on the Newer, Younger, More Male-Oriented, More Dumb-Ass Food Network:

ALTON BROWN: How did Alton slip inside the wire--and stay there all these years? He must have something on them. He’s smart. You actually learn something from his commentary. And I’ll admit it: I watch and enjoy Iron Chef America-in all its cheesy glory. Absolutely SHOCKED and thrilled when guys like Homaru Cantu show up as contestants--and delighted when Mario wins--again and again, forestalling his secretly long-planned execution. His commentary is mostly good. And that collar-bone snapping fall off the motorcycle on Feasting On Asphalt? Good television!

EMERIL: I’m actually grateful when I channel surf across his show. He’s STILL there--the original Behemoth. And I STILL find him unwatchable. As much mileage as I’ve gotten over the years, making fun of Emeril; he deserves a lot more respect than I’ve given him. He does run a very successful and very decent restaurant group. He is--in fact--a really nice guy. And-as much as I hate the show-- compared to the current crop of culinary non-entities, he looks like Escoffier. He will probably be the last of the Real Chefs. I’m sure they’re growing future replacement options in petrie dishes somewhere, conducting Top Secret focus groups at suburban malls with their latest Bright Young Hopeful. I’m just glad he’s still there--a rebuke to the geniuses who brought us such Great Ideas as Dweezil and Lisa.

BOBBY FLAY: They seem to have noticed Bobby’s strong “negatives” among some viewer responses during focus groups--and decided to respond by subjecting poor Bobby to THROWDOWN; the object of which is to allow every web-fingered geek with a backyard grill--or half-mad muffin maker to proclaim, “I beat Bobby Flay at makin’ barbeque!” at the heart-warming end of show--before returning to tend their meth labs.. I watched poor Bobby battle to a draw recently in some bogus Southwestern “Chili Face-Off.” Now…does ANYONE actually believe that Bobby Flay can’t make a better chili than a supermarket ground beef bearing amateur? I don’t. It’s a cruel exercise in humiliation. A variation on “Dunk Bozo” or “Shoot The Geek,” at the carnival. And whatever I might have thought of Flay’s previous TV efforts, I find the network’s misuse of one of their founding chefs to be nauseatingly cynical. The conspiratorial-minded might be tempted to suspect this as yet another part of the Secret Plan to rid themselves of the annoyingly big ticket chefs--by driving Bobby to quit--or insane with misery. He may not be Mr. Cuddlesworth, but he’s a successful businessman and a good chef--and he doesn’t, after all, need this shit.

MARIO!
Oh, Mario! Oh great one! They shut down Molto Mario--only the smartest and best of the stand-up cooking shows. Is there any more egregiously under-used, criminally mishandled, dismissively treated chef on television? Relegated to the circus of Iron Chef America, where--like a great, toothless lion, fouling his cage, he hangs on--and on--a major draw (and often the only reason to watch the show). How I would like to see him unchained, free to make the television shows he’s capable of, the Real Mario--in all his Rabelasian brilliance. How I would love to hear the snapping bones of his cruel FN ringmasters, crunching between his mighty jaws! Let us see the cloven hooves beneath those cheery clogs! Let Mario be Mario!

THAT ACE OF CAKES GUY: Hey…He’s got talent! And..he seems to be a trained chef! And he’s really making food--and selling it in a real business! I think…I like it! If I have one reservation, it’s that I have no idea if the stuff actually TASTES good. It LOOKS really creative and quirky--and I’m interested but…I mean...it’s like construction going on over there from what we’re told and shown. One suspects that the producers don’t want to waste valuable time talking about anything so technical as food--on “Food” Network. I mean...what’s in those cakes, beneath the icing and marzipan and fondant? That said, it’s the only “kicky, new, cutting edge, in-your-face” hopeful they’ve managed to trot out of any quality in memory. Hope it lasts. Wait till they try and put the poor bastard on a pony--or do a “Tailgate Special” with the usual suspects. Or a “Thanksgiving Special” where he has to sit down with the bobbleheads and pretend to like it. On balance, it’s still probably the best new project they’ve come up with in a long, long time.

GIADA: What’s going on here!? Giada can actually cook! She was robbed in her bout versus Rachael Ray on ICA. ROBBED! And Food Net seems more interested in her enormous head (big head equals big ratings. Really!) and her cleavage--than the fact that she’s likeable, knows what she’s doing in an Italian kitchen--and makes food you’d actually want to eat. The new high concept Weekend Getaway show is a horrible, tired re-cap of the cheap-ass “Best Of” and “40 Dollar a Day” formula. Send host to empty restaurant. Watch them make crappy food for her. Have her take a few lonely, awkward stabs at the plate, then feign enjoyment with appropriately orgasmic eye-closing and moaning..Before spitting it out and rushing to the trailer. Send her to Italy and let her cook. She’s good at it.

RACHAEL: Complain all you want. It’s like railing against the pounding surf. She only grows stronger and more powerful. Her ear-shattering tones louder and louder. We KNOW she can’t cook. She shrewdly tells us so. So...what is she selling us? Really? She’s selling us satisfaction, the smug reassurance that mediocrity is quite enough. She’s a friendly, familiar face who appears regularly on our screens to tell us that “Even your dumb, lazy ass can cook this!” Wallowing in your own crapulence on your Cheeto-littered couch you watch her and think, “Hell…I could do that. I ain’t gonna…but I could--if I wanted! Now where’s my damn jug a Diet Pepsi?” Where the saintly Julia Child sought to raise expectations, to enlighten us, make us better--teach us--and in fact, did, Rachael uses her strange and terrible powers to narcotize her public with her hypnotic mantra of Yummo and Evoo and Sammys. “You’re doing just fine. You don’t even have to chop an onion--you can buy it already chopped. Aspire to nothing…Just sit there. Have another Triscuit…Sleep….sleep….”

PAULA DEEN: I’m reluctant to bash what seems to be a nice old lady. Even if her supporting cast is beginning to look like the Hills Have Eyes--and her food a True Buffet of Horrors. A recent Hawaii show was indistinguishable from an early John Waters film. And the food on a par with the last scene of Pink Flamingos. But I’d like to see her mad. Like her look-alike, Divine in the classic, “Female Trouble.“ Paula Deen on a Baltimore Killing Spree would be something to see. Let her get Rachael in a headlock--and it’s all over.

SANDRA LEE: Pure evil. This frightening Hell Spawn of Kathie Lee and Betty Crocker seems on a mission to kill her fans, one meal at a time. She Must Be Stopped. Her death-dealing can-opening ways will cut a swath of destruction through the world if not contained. I would likely be arrested if I suggested on television that any children watching should promptly go to a wooded area with a gun and harm themselves. What’s the difference between that and Sandra suggesting we fill our mouths with Ritz Crackers, jam a can of Cheez Wiz in after and press hard? None that I can see. This is simply irresponsible programming. Its only possible use might be as a psychological warfare strategy against the resurgent Taliban--or dangerous insurgent groups. A large-racked blonde repeatedly urging Afghans and angry Iraqis to stuff themseles with fatty, processed American foods might be just the weapon we need to win the war on terror.

AND FINALLY: Some IRON CHEF AMERICA match-ups I’d REALLY like to see:

-Mario Batali (with one arm tied behind his back--and drunk) vs. Regina Schrambling
-Michael Ruhlman, swacked on Ripple, vs. John Mariani-- in a Charcuterie Challenge
-Grant Achatz vs. That Guy In Australia Who Ripped off his recipes as his own
-Marco Pierre White vs. Gordon Ramsay
-Charlie Trotter vs. Martin Picard (Chicken Livers vs. Foie Gras)
-Chris Cosentino, Fergus Henderson, Martin Picard vs. Alain Passard, Roxanne Klein and Charlie Trotter (Cooked vs. Raw Challenge)
-Martha Stewart vs. Rachael Ray (bare knuckle cage match)
-Ducasse vs. Robuchon
-“Mikey” from Top Chef vs. Sandra Lee

Video Gold!

White v Ramsay wouldn't be much of a contest these days, sadly. Marco's too busy doing the whole well-fed Venetian Prince thing, and good for him.

She's either going to confirm what many other people have said (unlikely) or deny it all and claim the others just don't understand or have the full picture (likely). Being that she denied having a sexual relationship with that teenager and then a pic came out of her topless in bed with him, and that nothing others have said about her seems out of character for her, I'm inclined to believe the others' version of things over hers.

Before this year I had only caught episodes of his shows here and there, but I watched every episode of Parts Unknown this year, ending with the finale today. seeing everything was pretty wonderful. He's just so good at picking character out of a place, and great at getting people to share their stories. I loved pretty much every episode where he traveled with a companion, the joy between them is infectious

There are a small handful of episodes where I don't think he uses the time well, like some of the self-indulgent interviews with his heroes, but hey I'd probably do the same thing if I had a show

The final season suffered a bit from his lack of involvement. Obv not much of his VO, and they spent way more time than I think he would have mocking backpackers in Bali. And he would have HATED the episode which is just people gushing about him. But as mentioned the West Texas episode was great, as was the Kenya one. Very sad to reach the end

anyway here's my POX:
Quebec
Libya
Jerusalem
Copenhagen
Detroit
Sichuan
Houston
Japan (season 8)
Lagos
Bhutan

Agree, i read the oral history bio recently published, and am now working through the series again. The book confirms your take on the final series, inasmuch as he was not as interested/engaged as he had been

that Quebec episode is my favorite for sure. something about watching him eat so many amazing meats in the freezing cold with cool people.

the Libya ep is so good. it also feels like its where the show really starts grow, exploring that somewhat journalistic niche for him.

the vietnam episode in s4 has always been a highlight for me, looking foward to revisiting

oh and i used to love the Vienna episode because he’s so sure he’ll hate it and he ends up having a lovely time

*final season, i meant, not series

Worst episode: the one with Joe Rogan

I love almost all of the rest of it but haven’t seen all of it yet. The Quebec episode was great, I liked the one in the Philippines a lot cause he obviously had such a personal connection there.

that Berlin episode with that numpt US rockband mate of his was pretty bad, though at least there was a bit of Ellen Alien in there as well to almost redeem it!

one of the production crew, i cant remember if it was an editor or a director, said that they would call “cut to wide” to mark the end of a scene, and that Tony would often invariably say something offhanded because he knew he was done - they used 100% of those, because he always said or did something great.

it was cool reading about how engaged he was with the show, even about what a pain in the ass he could be. as a crew they were very much “all-in” with him, and working towards the same goal because of his enthusiasm for the authentic experiences they were trying to capture. a lot of it kind of sounds like a stressful nightmare as you could well imagine, but the driving underlying determination to get it right really shows on screen remarkably consistently

Yeah the Berlin one a good example of his self-indulgence. Newcombe is entertaining enough, but c'mon, show me Berlin!

I'll have to check out that oral history book, I loved the behind-the-scenes ep in the last season and am eager to know more about how they made the show

it’s great - and a lot of varied feedback about him, not just a “he was a genius” circle jerk

watched road runner last night, and found the last 30 minutes or so completely repugnant. was enjoying the enneagram 7 energy before that tho