worst sounding sushi roll at guy fieri's southern bbq & california style sushi restaurant tex wasabi's

omg strongo

omg jjjusten

the teddy ruxpin i want your sex story is my favorite story

I am tempted to post that on Facebook, but I have professional contacts there, although one of them just had his wife threaten to shove wasabi "up [his] japs eye" on one of his wall posts so maybe it wouldn't matter

especially the image of baby strongo chasing beverly [REDACTED] around calling her "toots"

TS:

Ten seconds later, if Guy’s penis was his knees, and Megan’s pussy was water, Guy was knee-deep in water.

vs

Megan’s moaning got louder and louder, and suddenly KER-SPLOOSH she squirted so hard that, like a water-powered jet pack, it shot the two of them through the roof of the diner and straight out into space where they both died of asphyxiation.

regardless of how racist some of my coworkers are, posting that would be a poor career decision y/n

go for it!

(dont really go for it)

also that last line got "Lullaby" stuck in my head

me too!

I was too ashamed to admit it

tempted to make "and suddenly KER-SPLOOSH" my new DN

Ten seconds later, if Guy’s penis was his knees, and Megan’s pussy was water, Guy was knee-deep in water.

this is just

all time

also, DJP, NO

hey at least they both die at the end

guys should i message beverly [REDACTED] on facebook, y/n?

yes

I just added the girl who prank called me in 6th grade on fb, today is a blessed day imo

DJP, yes, a thousand times yes

she moved away when she was about 12 and then a year later called me and had gotten all scary and grownup and into like anthrax and slayer

also dan if you dont i will

on your wall

stop me before i kill again

well no one told me not to, so

and there it is

KER-SPLOOSH there it is

awesome, ask her if she wants to go to Guy's American whatever it's called

HAHAHAHA YOU DICK HAHAHAHAHAHA

that's what I get for working

ask her if she wants to play teddy ruxpin

tell her a man's got his patience, and here's where yours ends

haha no i didnt't msg beverly [REDACTED] i posted guy-fucking to djp's facebook

omg

and then I deleted it and called strongo a bastard on his facebook

what must the community think

I was all "doo-dih-doo, I wonder what awesome track strongo posted on my wall, maybe he threw 'Unity In Dub' up there OMG NO NO NO BOXCAR"

this has been quite a day!

plz let us know if you msg the lovely ms. redacted

well as for beverly [REDACTED], sorry, toots. you had your chance. i'm taken now.

In honor of Guy, I'm going to pour mayonnaise on tonight's salad and put the whole thing in a deep fryer.

I think even those brief excerpts of fic have ruined me psychologically.

what, the thought of hot ham sauce itt wasn't enough

i sense nanowrimo's influence in this.

if it were earlier in the month i would totally do a guy fieri nanowrimo

let's just do it anyway

djp will you go to guy fieri's restaurant with me?

FUCK YES I WILL

I have to do an NYC trip at some point anyway to visit FB and his fiancee so that would dovetail nicely

― I loves you, PORGI (DJP), Wednesday, November 14, 2012 9:05 AM (6 hours ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

Ahaha.

We anticipate. We descend. We eat and drink stupid stuff. We act like a bunch of crazy guys. We laugh. We laugh too hard. We laugh to cover the emptiness of this gesture. We hate ourselves. We vomit. We post it to a message board.

Sure, why not?

can we do collab nanowrimo, is that a thing that can happen

this has to be at least as salable as my plan to rewrite candide as chick lit

Somebody start a guy fieri collectiv ilxor nanwrimo thread

STATELY, PLUMP GUY FIERI CAME TO THE STAIRHEAD, BEARING A BOWL OF PEPPER JACK

oh jesus