Let's bitch about our stupid, annoying co-workers

Kicked upstairs to management?

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Dilbert_principle

companies tend to systematically promote their least-competent employees to management (generally middle management), in order to limit the amount of damage they are capable of doing.

i gotta start workin on my incompetence, i figured it would have shone through by now but clearly i'm hiding my shite under a bushel

Because nobody would keep them as employees so they had to start their own businesses.

DING DING DING

Yes! Or when you show people how to copy files from a USB stick which appears as drive E to drive C, and that's fine, they remember that, they do it every few days with no problem. And a month later they put a new USB stick in and it appears as drive F and you say, OK, it's showing up as drive F in "My Computer" so you can just go into that and drag the files in the same way and they freeze up and tell you they don't know how and what the hell do you even mean because it's completely different.

I can't think of a work-related analogy for the analogy collection but uhh it's like they can't get the number 20 bus because they've only travelled on the number 15 bus before and the same concept of getting on the bus and saying their destination to the driver doesn't occur to them. Or something.

Yes! These comparisons are really helpful. It's just so frustrating. My bosses do good lawyering (judging by results and reputation) and I don't think they're dumb, but they just can't generalize for shit.

The other thing they do that makes me nuts is letting one computer (or phone, copier, etc) glitch or mistake wipe out years of ability and understanding. Eg: boss knows how to change color of text in a Word document. One day something actually legitimately goes wrong and we can't just highlight red text and select change text and I help her (or him). Fine. Except after then, they blot out their capabilities to change colors and they start asking, "Can you show me again how you change letters to red?" Which, as I said, they used to do just fine before.

Or "undo" Word and Excel. Lets say hey know how to undo deleting text and they know how to undo italicizing words (click the Undo button). But they DO NOT know how to undo bold-facing. Even though its the exact. Same. Thing.

Like, how deep does this all go? Will they forget how to smoke b/c they knew how to light cigarettes before, but the new ones are from a different pack?

Maybe a driving analogy would work better.

Holy crap, the woman who works across from me (who I like) has just revealed herself as a right-wing crank. One of my other co-workers, a known rabid righty, was ranting about the election results (with a smile on his face, it wasn't like he was getting all shouty and jabbing people in the sternum with a forefinger or anything) and this woman was agreeing with him, talking about how liberty is dead in America, our children will never know what it was like to be free, blah blah blah, and I thought she was just winding him up, but then I overheard her on the phone with someone else later and she was saying all the same stuff, and grumbling about how pro-Obama the office is! She's really nice and easy to work with, so I guess I'll be overlooking this side of her, but still - unexpected.

is it really unexpected that someone who isn't a dick might have different political opinions from you?

It's unexpected that someone who works for a record label in NYC would be a hardcore Republican.

i have avoided threads like this ... but no more.

for reason most folks know, i had to take a few months off work.

so, imagine my distress when upon my return a few weeks ago my lovely neighbour had been replaced with a loud mouthed, excessive shyte spouting monster.

fuck.

its making the daily grind all the more hellish.

i mean for ages i struggled with the issue whether i should make the effort to go back, and then after a lot of soul searching i find this new barrier to peace and harmony.

i totally accept my current troubles are nothing in comparison, but damn, i cant escape the non-stop loud mouth shit.

arghhhhhhhhhhhh.

now, just where is that box of wine ..

It's unexpected that someone who works for a record label in NYC would be a hardcore Republican.

Depends on how big the label is, I guess.

xpost 3rd draw down under the shoebox, behind the box of staples

*drawer

Dear co-worker who sits half the office away from me: shut up. Shutupshutupshutupshutup shut the fuuuck upppppp. Shut up about X Factor. Shut up about your coffee mug. Shut up about the equality training video. Shut up about the film you were talking about yesterday. SHUT UPPPPPPPPP I AM TRYING TO WORK

She's actually leaving next week! This thread gets results!

lucky you kinder.

I have a really nice co-worker who I like, but she does seem to vocalise every thought she has, usually as questions which are directed to herself but which sound as though she's asking the office at large. I work almost entirely under headphones with music now, which I worry makes me look bad, but it's the only way to concentrate.

I do that :( I am aware it annoys ppl haha oh dear.

I'm like Bernard Black, I'm always spluttering "what... WHAT!!?" at my screen.

ps i'm supervisory now, why the fuck don't underlings LISTEN

cos they don't care

don't even bother with them

i have to, they do all the shit i won't fuckin touch anymore, cos i'm above that now

focus on the good ones, let the weak starve and die.

or actually get fat and thrive. i can't tell who's winning this war.

public sector, but then they're all temp agency, there's no clear lines. I feel like the robot in prometheus.

kinder to let them die. Cleaner. Tests better with the public, certainly.

ps i'm supervisory now, why the fuck don't underlings LISTEN

― ut's nutta bull, ut's a *romanda* (darraghmac), Thursday, 8 November 2012 11:32 (28 minutes ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

why do they take a week-and-a-half to tell you they did everything on the first day and now they're bored?

cos it's nice to be paid to get sliwly bored, once threshold of boredom vs novelty of idleness aporoaches 1, inform supervisor

kinder to let them die. Cleaner. Tests better with the public, certainly

I'm on it, boss

that's the spirit. Fifty kills earns you a half day, not to be taken friday pm or monday am obv

omfg you guys
as we all know I am the Positivity Patrol - and more insufferably cheery in real life
Email sent out that my current/former manager will be covering some of my work while a replacement is found for me.
Manager writes to me directly telling me no, she won't be doing that, no one did it for her and if I want this promotion I have to work for it! Meanwhile I have not asked her for even a second of help, have been staying late covering everything, smiling and trying to help everyone as always..
While I am dealing with those emails - where there is implication she's worked her ass off and I never have (oh really) the woman meant to train me to do my new job starts ranting about something angrily and I said something like "okay, well let's not start our day with such stress" and she explodes and tells me she won't ever talk to me anymore and all this petty bullshit, storms off and closes the door to talk to my new boss..
Fuck all of you children! We are adults, act like it! I let a few stress tears out and now my eyes are all glossy and my head hurts and honestly, fuck this day.

(I should clarify - I did not send out an email saying manager would cover my work. The VP did, no notice to either of us. And my manager rejected outright the few resumes I could scrounge up for the position, because she "doesn't want to teach someone Excel." YOU MADE YOUR BED, LADY.)

arah, fuck them. Go to VP

I stopped replying to 'poor me' emails and put my headphones on so that I don't have to hear ranting woman. To complicate this, I face the ranter. Luckily my screen is at an angle. I intended to send out all my 'old' job work this week anyway, so my plan is to do that and let the VP ask me why, at which point I will direct her to talk to my former manager. I'm not letting myself get dragged into this shit and destroying my reputation as being a hardworking non-asshole. I'm very proud that I've become this person, because I used to be Angry McBlamey once upon a time.

Go to VP full of positivity and humor: "oh, our silly precious cow orkers." I can't do that myself, but that shit always works.

hah, tempting. Sadly, I don't have that rapport with the VP. We're not on bad terms but not close either. I'm just going to be awesome and let the other bastards feel embarassed for being unable to be as awesome as me. Thanks for listening, y'all. Kinda wish I could just go crawl in bed for this stupid day!

The smacker told me again yesterday that my butt looked good in my jeans. She's obsesses with me ass. Shit's getting weird.

lol - She's obsesses with me ass.

oops

She's obsessed with my ass. Sorry. I'm working on very little sleep here. Cut me some slack.

no problem, sugar buns.

http://1.bp.blogspot.com/_lZX1vnn5Ge4/SnkhMXEwr_I/AAAAAAAAB50/uU81Dg5aFBM/s320/Heat+5.jpg

I bitched about accidentally a cover of Born Slippy rather than the actual song and same former manager detailed upthread emailed me the copy of the mp3 she keeps on her work computer. Ups and downs. Perhaps the positivity patrol did its damn job. Though she still won't! Nyuk.

hahaha I accidentally'd a!

..accidentally *downloading from iTunes* a cover..

FFM that sucks very badly but having met you, I am pretty confident that your plan is going to succeed.

thank you! It seems to be working. Everyone is being quiet and polite. #EvilGenius

I have voicemail at work and my voicemail message says my name, my title, and my company. I invite people to leave a message and suggest that if they believe there is an emergency, they should contact my assistant. So why would someone call at 10 pm and leave a message talking about not going to be able to pick up somebody from somewhere that is completely unrelated to my job or my company? And not leave a callback number, because I am really nice and usually call people back and tell them they had the wrong number if it sounds important?

OK so, I work for Firm A which used to be part of Firm X, and the two share office space, and they also share me.

Last week, Firm X got new MS Word letterhead templates, but I did not receive one w/ my info. Today I'm told that there was no mistake, but Mr. X - infamous dipshit with beef with my boss Ms. A - decided that since I'm not X's direct employee, no letterhead for me.

I asked, what should I write correspondence on? Mr. X decides they will create a template with no sender's info and I am to write in my info.....

So my letters will go with my info awkwardly slapped on in the margin, projecting an image of Firm X's pettiness and jacked-uppedness.

Oh my holy shit it's a TEMPLATE. It's not even printed stationery that they have to PAY for!!! That is the pettiest thing imaginable!

oh ffs

that is pathetic, je55e. I hate him on your behalf

Yeh, he's a dumbass. His beef is due to thinking "Ms. A" poached me when the firms split. So in revenge, he has his firm send out shitty looking letters.

The good part is that I billed his firm for the time it took to figure out the letterhead problem.