post your greatest achievements in the field of procrastination

Making a phone call to reschedule something is accomplishing a task. Did it! Check!

xp exactly

manager: "What did you accomplish today?"
snoball: "I touched base with Bob!"
manager: "Good work, keep it up."

today at a rescheduled meeting i set the date for a meeting in which we will finish the brainstorming that we didn't finish today

-- finish brainstorming: scheduled! check!

can't wait to reschedule that one

that post makes me sick just thinking about it

Actually the best/worst meeting I ever had in one of my old jobs was a meeting with a manager where we discussed how behind the department was with various client projects. Consciously I knew everything was f-ed up, but subconsciously I could feel that I was getting a buzz out of this non-work/pretend work. We were sitting in a conference room! We were discussing deadlines! We were looking at a complex printout of a work schedule! We were using different coloured highlighters to prioritise project tasks! We were setting new deadlines!

i did that today! there was an incomprehensible spreadsheet and minutes being taken!

Any meeting where:
a) minutes are taken,
b) someone connects a video projector to their laptop and shows everyone a spreadsheet,
c) people make sure to bring a little cup of water from the watercooler
...is basically a meeting where nothing of consequence will happen and no important decisions will be made.

There are two conference room meeting scenes that spring to my mind: the first is the scene with the computer software sales guy in Fight Club, and the second is (possibly real) from The Kids Are Alright, where Townshend is discussing the future of the group, and suddenly Moon gets bored and does a handstand on the table to illustrate Pete's thought that the The Who were going to end up as a cabaret act.

we have been provided with a template for minutes, just fill in the blanks with a few sentences of syntactically sound but meaningless nonsense and BOOM you check something off the list
yes, i DO have minutes from that meeting

http://i.imgur.com/hwWMH.gif

After ten years, got working smoke alarms by moving to a house with working smoke alarms. There was a functioning smoke alarm sitting on a shelf for most of those ten years just needing a battery and to be fitted.