Your impending Avril Lavigne/Chad Kroeger nuptials thread

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DRAKE AND GEDDY LEE??!?!?!@

Porto for Pyros (The Cursed Return of the Dastardly Thermo Thinwall), Wednesday, 22 August 2012 00:59 (eleven years ago) link

alex in mtl is on fire on twitter:

Craig from Degrassi just announced his engagement to the girl from that one episode of Are You Afraid of the Dark?

Bryan Adams just announced his engagement to Shania Twain.

Carly Rae Jepsen just announced her engagement to Kardinal Offishall. He'll be taking her name & will henceforth be 'Kardinal Rae Jepsen'.

k.d. lang is marrying either Tegan OR Sara. It's unclear.

Chantal Kreviazuk and Raine Maida are still the reigning couple of CanCon. Chadvril can pry that title from their cold dead hands.

some dude, Wednesday, 22 August 2012 01:01 (eleven years ago) link

CHADVRIL!

Porto for Pyros (The Cursed Return of the Dastardly Thermo Thinwall), Wednesday, 22 August 2012 01:03 (eleven years ago) link

chadvril reminds me of chervil. i will mince some chadvril and use it in fines herbes.

ezra kleine nachtmusik (get bent), Wednesday, 22 August 2012 01:06 (eleven years ago) link

chadvil is what you take to treat a canadian power ballad-induced headache

some dude, Wednesday, 22 August 2012 01:09 (eleven years ago) link

this is the best news of the day

jack chick-fil-A (dayo), Wednesday, 22 August 2012 01:23 (eleven years ago) link

http://i.imgur.com/Wfv19.png

jack chick-fil-A (dayo), Wednesday, 22 August 2012 01:25 (eleven years ago) link

where are YOUR terrible songs about rockstars? hmmmm?

set the controls for the heart of the sun (VegemiteGrrl), Wednesday, 22 August 2012 01:35 (eleven years ago) link

ChuckleFack

Gurdas Mane (crüt), Wednesday, 22 August 2012 01:36 (eleven years ago) link

chadvril kroegvigne

ezra kleine nachtmusik (get bent), Wednesday, 22 August 2012 01:37 (eleven years ago) link

they have achieved in life.

big-mammed punisher (strongo hulkington's ghost dad), Wednesday, 22 August 2012 01:40 (eleven years ago) link

chad kroeger never got a "not working to potential" on his report card.

big-mammed punisher (strongo hulkington's ghost dad), Wednesday, 22 August 2012 01:40 (eleven years ago) link

Stephen Thomas Erlewine:

The answer to the kind of woman who falls for "you look so much cuter with something in your mouth" apparently is Avril Lavigne

Ned Raggett, Wednesday, 22 August 2012 01:41 (eleven years ago) link

It will be Kroeger's first trip down the aisle, and the second marriage for Lavigne, who split from Sum 41 frontman Deryck Whibley in 2009. She had also dated Brody Jenner.

In a related story, I read an interview with KroegerCollaborator "the Dude from Steel Panther" who revealed that Chad has in his employ a man whose one and only job is to roll joints for Kroeger.

I wager dollars to Tim Horton donuts that Avril will leave Kroeger for that man within three years. It's the 21st Century version of sleeping with the Groundskeeper.

Hut Stricklin at Lake Speed (C. Grisso/McCain), Wednesday, 22 August 2012 01:44 (eleven years ago) link

my extended family is mostly full of people with strong opinions about things like socialized medicine, homosexualists, and the evils of various minorities. (don't get me wrong, i love them dearly.) but i think the most horrifying post-thanksgiving-dinner conversation i ever had to sit through was a serious and in-depth debate about the merits of just about every song in the nickelback catalog, including b-sides.

i actually want to call some of them right now and get their take on this news.

big-mammed punisher (strongo hulkington's ghost dad), Wednesday, 22 August 2012 01:45 (eleven years ago) link

When I tell someone where I work, 95 percent of the time they ask "What bands are on that label?" and I take five seconds to think which ones I could mention to get the smile of recognition that means the conversation can move forward, and then I say "Slipknot and Nickelback."

誤訳侮辱, Wednesday, 22 August 2012 01:50 (eleven years ago) link

woah you work for dfa?

balls, Wednesday, 22 August 2012 01:52 (eleven years ago) link

think about it, won't you? thank you.

www.youtube.com/watch?v=1Dhf5ZTZn5o#t=2m05s

da croupier, Wednesday, 22 August 2012 01:56 (eleven years ago) link

come vote in my poll fat lip v. how you remind me

jack chick-fil-A (dayo), Wednesday, 22 August 2012 01:57 (eleven years ago) link

These engagement dinner photos are great:

http://1.bp.blogspot.com/_f5iltKJJRPU/TM5DKt2OolI/AAAAAAAAF_A/VgXlmFgh51E/s1600/me+and+the+mullet.jpg

Ned Raggett, Wednesday, 22 August 2012 01:58 (eleven years ago) link

http://i.imgur.com/ljkPU.gif

jack chick-fil-A (dayo), Wednesday, 22 August 2012 02:00 (eleven years ago) link

I think he worked hard for all this! Congratulation Chad... you made it!
biggixjr 3 months ago 9

balls, Wednesday, 22 August 2012 02:01 (eleven years ago) link

That's big-ass piece of pizza.

Hut Stricklin at Lake Speed (C. Grisso/McCain), Wednesday, 22 August 2012 02:17 (eleven years ago) link

man he's one.. weird yet ordinary looking doofus.

piscesx, Wednesday, 22 August 2012 02:25 (eleven years ago) link

look at this photograph, every time i do etc.

some dude, Wednesday, 22 August 2012 02:29 (eleven years ago) link

Can you imagine what their sex moans must sound like? "AWWWRRGGGHHHLLLYYAAAEEUUUGGHHHRRRRYYAAHHH!!!"

NR’s resident heavy-metal expert (Nicole), Wednesday, 22 August 2012 03:09 (eleven years ago) link

aaaand there goes my dinner

set the controls for the heart of the sun (VegemiteGrrl), Wednesday, 22 August 2012 03:12 (eleven years ago) link

That is probably the worst thing I've ever wrote or thought.

NR’s resident heavy-metal expert (Nicole), Wednesday, 22 August 2012 03:14 (eleven years ago) link

chadvril kroegvigne

dying.

nedless summer (Ówen P.), Wednesday, 22 August 2012 03:24 (eleven years ago) link

I hope their kids are talented at sports

nedless summer (Ówen P.), Wednesday, 22 August 2012 03:25 (eleven years ago) link

This thread is commanded to decide between Chavril or Chadvril while I sleep tonight.

Ned Raggett, Wednesday, 22 August 2012 03:38 (eleven years ago) link

This Is The Dream Chad and Avril needs to be a song on Owen's next rekkid.

to welcome jer.fairall, pie is served. (jer.fairall), Wednesday, 22 August 2012 03:42 (eleven years ago) link

I have also just realized, with a sinking sense of horror, that the two of them probably think a Daenerys Targaryen/Khal Drogo themed wedding is actually a good idea.

Ned Raggett, Wednesday, 22 August 2012 03:42 (eleven years ago) link

Chadvril is easier to say, Chavril looks funnier in print

set the controls for the heart of the sun (VegemiteGrrl), Wednesday, 22 August 2012 03:43 (eleven years ago) link

Chavril sounds like a suppository...or the Nickleback catalog! (rimshot)

Hut Stricklin at Lake Speed (C. Grisso/McCain), Wednesday, 22 August 2012 03:45 (eleven years ago) link

Chadvril is easier to say

This is false, surely?

EveningStar (Sund4r), Wednesday, 22 August 2012 03:50 (eleven years ago) link

Chil Lavoeger

StanM, Wednesday, 22 August 2012 04:04 (eleven years ago) link

I shoulda known

https://twitter.com/Krovigne

Ned Raggett, Wednesday, 22 August 2012 04:23 (eleven years ago) link

Meanwhile, I only just put two and two together about how Whiney won the thread way up near the top. And my mind is SCARRED.

Ned Raggett, Wednesday, 22 August 2012 04:33 (eleven years ago) link

:D

Fareed Zaireeka (Whiney G. Weingarten), Wednesday, 22 August 2012 04:35 (eleven years ago) link

o/

maura, Wednesday, 22 August 2012 04:43 (eleven years ago) link

haha maura only shows up for the trainwrecks

mookieproof, Wednesday, 22 August 2012 04:47 (eleven years ago) link

\o

Fareed Zaireeka (Whiney G. Weingarten), Wednesday, 22 August 2012 04:48 (eleven years ago) link

congrats once again to the kroeg and the lav

ezra kleine nachtmusik (get bent), Wednesday, 22 August 2012 05:33 (eleven years ago) link

this is fucked.

dylannn, Wednesday, 22 August 2012 07:54 (eleven years ago) link

but it's weird to think chad kroeger is getting my slppy seconds
i was there first dawg

dylannn, Wednesday, 22 August 2012 07:55 (eleven years ago) link

Wait, what happened with the sum 41 dude?

formerly EDB (ed.b), Wednesday, 22 August 2012 07:56 (eleven years ago) link

The marriage lasted a little over three years, and in October 2009, Lavigne filed for divorce. Whibley and Lavigne continued to work together, with Whibley producing her fourth album, as well as Lavigne's single, "Alice", written for Tim Burton's film Alice in Wonderland.

ʘ (sic), Wednesday, 22 August 2012 08:38 (eleven years ago) link

http://tinyurl.com/5udzhrs

markers, Wednesday, 22 August 2012 12:11 (eleven years ago) link

xpost 2 ffm

http://www.buzzfeed.com/lyapalater/avril-lavignes-ex-dressed-up-as-her-for-halloween

markers, Thursday, 1 November 2012 19:21 (eleven years ago) link

thanks markers! his haha lamed it out a bit IMO. just burn 'deryck,' he deserves it. shitty little suburbs punk.

she started dancing to that (Finefinemusic), Thursday, 1 November 2012 19:27 (eleven years ago) link

the fact that deryck went as his baby mama and not as chad makes the costume way funnier and cooler than the response imo

some dude, Thursday, 1 November 2012 19:39 (eleven years ago) link

I am pretty sure Deryck is dressed as Chad, regardless of the headline

Gandalf’s Gobble Melt (DJP), Thursday, 1 November 2012 19:40 (eleven years ago) link

why is deryck whibley so bad and hated, ffm?

how's life, Thursday, 1 November 2012 19:40 (eleven years ago) link

this is what whibley looks like

http://www4.images.coolspotters.com/photos/20312/deryck-whibley-profile.jpg

clearly he's avril and not chad in that pic

some dude, Thursday, 1 November 2012 19:42 (eleven years ago) link

although the idea of a onetime rock star having a girlfriend THAT ugly is pretty funny

some dude, Thursday, 1 November 2012 19:42 (eleven years ago) link

you remember that Chad used to look like this, right:

http://static.tumblr.com/umlpszj/6u3lnzzya/chad-kroeger.jpg

also his girlfriend is pretty obviously dressed like Avril

Gandalf’s Gobble Melt (DJP), Thursday, 1 November 2012 19:43 (eleven years ago) link

oh hahahaha I only just realized that they genderswapped costumes

Gandalf’s Gobble Melt (DJP), Thursday, 1 November 2012 19:45 (eleven years ago) link

I thought you were trolling us.

how's life, Thursday, 1 November 2012 19:45 (eleven years ago) link

haha seriously

some dude, Thursday, 1 November 2012 19:45 (eleven years ago) link

http://bit.ly/4B3khT

markers, Thursday, 1 November 2012 19:47 (eleven years ago) link

no particular reason for Deryck hate. I hate deliberately mispelled names and am willing to blame the sins of the fathers on the children, etc. Also IIRC he's from Whitby, ON and all those little cities east of Toronto are full of annoying skater punks. And other good things.. but the damn skater punks make so much noise. /oldlady

she started dancing to that (Finefinemusic), Thursday, 1 November 2012 20:14 (eleven years ago) link

Some of the band's songs contain political-social commentary; "The Jester" is an "anti-Bush screed", "Underclass Hero" is a song about class struggle, and "Dear Father" is about Deryck's absent father.

turds (Hungry4Ass), Thursday, 1 November 2012 20:17 (eleven years ago) link

I don't feel bad - everyone in the Durham region has family troubles & class struggles - I should know, I escaped by the skin of my teeth ;)

she started dancing to that (Finefinemusic), Thursday, 1 November 2012 20:21 (eleven years ago) link

will give you special credit for helping to inspire my epic poem "Whibley From Whitby" btw

some dude, Thursday, 1 November 2012 20:24 (eleven years ago) link

omg can't wait!

she started dancing to that (Finefinemusic), Thursday, 1 November 2012 20:31 (eleven years ago) link

after a brief Wikibrowse I regret to speak out that I was misinformed, he's from Ajax, right beside Whitby. I have failed you :(

she started dancing to that (Finefinemusic), Thursday, 1 November 2012 20:33 (eleven years ago) link

well that's a sticky Wiki Whibley Whitby wicket, then.

some dude, Thursday, 1 November 2012 20:37 (eleven years ago) link

<3

she started dancing to that (Finefinemusic), Thursday, 1 November 2012 21:43 (eleven years ago) link

one month passes...

And here it is. Merry Christmas.

http://popdust.com/2012/12/12/avril-lavigne-chad-kroeger-nickelback-how-you-remind-me-cover/

Ned Raggett, Wednesday, 12 December 2012 15:15 (eleven years ago) link

lol i actually really like it

teledyldonix, Wednesday, 12 December 2012 16:37 (eleven years ago) link

one year passes...

Tru luv.

Josh in Chicago, Friday, 1 August 2014 16:22 (nine years ago) link

hubby

love is how's life tonight (how's life), Friday, 1 August 2014 16:49 (nine years ago) link

one month passes...

If this is true and the two split up, Chad Kroeger should marry Mutt Lange.

Josh in Chicago, Wednesday, 17 September 2014 18:02 (nine years ago) link

The top comment on that article:

I eagerly await the Lifetime biopic with Taylor Momson and Dax Shepard.

MaudAddam (cryptosicko), Wednesday, 17 September 2014 22:18 (nine years ago) link

eleven months pass...

Might this be...TRUE?

In a related story, I read an interview with KroegerCollaborator "the Dude from Steel Panther" who revealed that Chad has in his employ a man whose one and only job is to roll joints for Kroeger.

I wager dollars to Tim Horton donuts that Avril will leave Kroeger for that man within three years. It's the 21st Century version of sleeping with the Groundskeeper.

― Hut Stricklin at Lake Speed (C. Grisso/McCain), Tuesday, August 21, 2012 6:44 PM (3 years ago)

Ned Raggett, Wednesday, 2 September 2015 19:32 (eight years ago) link

I guess this means that everyone has a forthcoming divorce-themed Nickelback album to avoid.

Turrican, Wednesday, 2 September 2015 19:38 (eight years ago) link

two years pass...

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