Craigslist hilarity

It depends what they are protesting.

Also, he is there.

They're protesting against the police presence outside the embassy which stops him leaving it.

Ok. Thanks for the clarification.

ditto.

"Looking forward to using your tent"

btw assange protestors at my building this morning, apparently b/c of the british consulate.

"my plan right now is to sleep on the pavement, but if you want to share what you have"

I mean gosh I was just going to sleep on this dirty sidewalk over here, don't worry about me...oh really, wow thanks. Boy even in this tent it sure is cold with no sleeping bag. Too bad there's only one...

http://seattle.craigslist.org/oly/rnr/3221349546.html

I wear tappout shirts punk (what of it punks?)
Date: 2012-08-27, 1:13PM PDT

I am representing my sport and also warning punks to back the fuck off when i am out having a good time I dont want to be messed with. I wont hesitate to get you in a kumora or a figure four or a ankle lock on the bar floor. I am ready to roll 24 7 365 punbks and that is why I wear tapout shirts so I am giving you fair and legal warning so I am not held liable for any brutal beat down or broken or dislocated body parts. I can not be sued if I wear a warning on my shirt. I expect all my students at my Karate school in Graham area to represent by eaither wearing school shirts with dragon logo or a tappout shirt. Now lets be done with this topic I am getting pissed again. Grand Master now meditates.

Location: what of it punks?
it's NOT ok to contact this poster with services or other commercial interests

http://seattle.craigslist.org/oly/rnr/3233251390.html

blackbelt in mma bitches (tap out pass out cry)
Date: 2012-08-27, 1:22PM PDT

I have a black belt in mma and not only wear a tapout shirt, hat with brim sideways I have my scary tribal tattoos to warn all you wannabes to stay the fuck away from me and my mma gang. I run a mma school and have to keep you fans at a distance just like famous actors or famous singers. We are alot alike with you fans always wanting to hang with us, get our autograghs and sometimes stalking us. We cant take chances. We have to put you wannabe fans in your place so you keep back and dont get tapped out. I have had to tap out several mma fans who could not contain themselves while drinking. I am always out in Lacey area after we train and we get messed with often so i wear tapout shirts. What of it? Step into my octogon bitches and you'll get the superman beatdown.

Location: tap out pass out cry
it's NOT ok to contact this poster with services or other commercial interests

Thunder Thighs at Mr K's - w4m - 24 (Mr K's)

Date: 2012-08-08, 12:53AM EDT Reply to: z9wkr-3191294✧✧✧@p✧✧✧.craigsl✧✧✧.o✧✧

I saw you in the cookbook section of Mr K's. You said you were cooking up a pie for dinner and needed a good recipe. Keep eating those pies, honey. You're beautiful.

Location: Mr K's it's NOT ok to contact this poster with services or other commercial interests

http://wausau.craigslist.org/mis/3300198869.html

kind of hilarious but also kind of really poignant :~(

I don't get it... He thinks they could be friends, because they bot have... grey cars?

Turns out you get it

Apparently in the year 2216 this is how people decide who to be friends with

Well, it seems like the victim has a grey Dodge Stratus. The post's author may have a grey Chrysler Cirrus or Plymouth Breeze, cars built on the same platform but under different Chrysler different brands.

oh ffs, "victim"

lol

May be truer than you know. There's a kind of "One Hour Photo" vibe along with the hilarity/poignancy.

http://pittsburgh.craigslist.org/sub/3316315446.html

So apparently I could see Radiohead tonight and end my sex drought all in one go?

http://www.gumtree.com/p/for-sale/2-x-seated-radiohead-tickets--o2-london--tuesday-9th-october--terms-apply-see-description/1001601899

(I dunno... why is this scenario so... oddly unappealing?)

"has been fornicated"

'sex after concert encouraged' -- not necessarily with him? :/

http://detroit.craigslist.org/wyn/pet/3328812548.html

My name is Melissa and I am a interspecies telepathic animal communicator.
Telepathy is a three way conversation between myself, you and your animal friend. The only information I need to get a connection with your pet is a picture and their name so that I know who I am speaking with. Through this subtle communication questions can be answered and harmony restored in your life journey with your animal friend. Telepathy can bennefit in many situations like being able to communicate with animals who have passed on. Telepathy can be used as another tool under your belt for training issues by finding out why our pet is being resistant wether it is a pain issue or your animal friend is mis understanding what you are asking of them . but please keep in mind that Telepathy is not a cure all or Quick Fix for training it's self you still must apply proper training with your pet.
Also in some situations when a pet has become lost, or left home for any reason through telepathy they can show me images of land marks they see around them or things they may have passed by that you may recognise to be able to find them or guide them home again. But please keep in mind that I am not a GPS so I do not receive address's or street names..

If this lady is able to make money with this I might try to be an interspecies telepathic animal communicator on craigslist as well.

But please keep in mind that I am not a GPS

good to know

This is a very long and sad novel:

http://toronto.en.craigslist.ca/tor/for/3439833011.html

it's like a garage sale with inflated prices

ugh, yeah, keep dreaming guys

this is probably the best:

39. Radiohead Rainbows CD $10 (originally $25)

The poster is not only selling the entire contents of her house but also her identity

otm

damp towel, used

Room Available for Renting (Bed-Stuy)

Date: 2012-12-20, 1:20PM EST
Reply to this post supersta✧✧✧@metro✧✧✧.blackbe✧✧✧.c✧✧[?]
Wasssup how yall doing
You got a cool down to earth dude
Here from Bed-stuy Brooklyn
Looking for anybody that need to rent
A room for a few hours are you
Tired of having to do it in cars
Or having to keep going to
Travel to your dates well no need
To have to do that any more
I have a room available for more
Info hit me up ASAP the last room
I had up for available went in
One day so don't miss out
420 friendly serious reply's only thank you
(number redcated) call or text for more info

redacted, even

sung to the tune of 'Fresh Prince of Bel-Air'

http://seattle.craigslist.org/see/mis/3499778236.html

--
seattle craigslist > seattle > personals > missed connections

I asked your friend (who doesn't speak English) if he's on steroids - m4m - 32 (LAF ballard)
He called on you to translate what I was asking. If he's into guys, please let him know that i'm interested.

Location: LAF ballard
it's NOT ok to contact this poster with services or other commercial interests
--

missed connections, man

lol

Somehow, I doubt this is the first time the "100% Perfect Girl" Murakami story has been posted on CL.

http://sanantonio.craigslist.org/mis/3507956645.html

This one makes me kind of sad

Silver Bear where you got? - m4m - 35 (The woodlands/Conroe)

Date: 2012-12-22, 7:23PM CST
Reply to this post fsps2-3448438✧✧✧@p✧✧✧.craigsl✧✧✧.o✧✧
We just to get together here at my house in the woodlands
I lost contact with you
You are silver bear cute married
You live on Conroe
I remember you say in Christmas you put a lot Christmas tree at you house
Me Spanish guy in the woodlands work in a restaurant
I want hear from you because we just to have great time together
Location: The woodlands/Conroe
it's NOT ok to contact this poster with services or other commercial interests

aw

yeah that's really touching

sounds hot

Hello singers....acoustic guitar player looking to musically mix it up with an Asain female singer that writes lyrics and melodies...

I desire only to collaborate on originals, not covers....I feel that what I have to offer as a musician is unique and original....

My music is more Lydian, Ethereal and a little out of this world....I play with alternative tunings also and tune to a different
frequency than A=440, which is A=432hz....this is a whole new musical experience for the right person....

Blessed be......

Besides the other weirdnesses here, what would be the point of tuning to 432?

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Pythagorean_tuning

oh dude, google 432 hz tuning...you're in for a conspiracy theory treat.
Go. I'll wait right here.

Tempering music is a bit off, I think. It seems Hz is more the key here. The Beatles played their music in 432 Hz, John Lenon died young. The Doors, Elvis and some other musicians all died mysteriously at 27 yrs old, all using 432 Hz tuning.

It seems they could tune their guitars to 432 Hz. I found some examples of this on u-tube also. I don't understand it to mean designing new instruments.

Jim Hendricks was another musician who died at 27. There are quite a few of them, all using 432 Hz.

What is this even

Of all the conspiracy theories out there this one might be the most confusing AND amusing to me

How have I never heard of this before? Schooled by a Craigslist nut. This site, wau:

http://www.432hertz.com/index.html

it's like the fuckin timecube of music

What a blow to the Doors for them to all die at 27. Hopefully they were a bit staggered in age.

http://images.craigslist.org/3Ld3F73M25I35Ee5M2d1v62b9d3bcab821357.jpg

PARTY ORGY IN A BUS (Clintonville)

18+, STD FREE, AND LOOKING TO HAVE FUN? WELL THIS IS YOUR CHANCE FOR THE PARTY OF A LIFETIME. AN ORGY WITH OVER 50+ WOMAN AND MEN INSIDE A PARTY BUS. ALL YOU HAVE TO DO IS ARRIVE AT THE PICKUP LOCATION BEFORE THE PARTY BUS LEAVES PICK UP TIME IS 11:10 INFRONT OF 38 EAST KELSO 43214 CLINTONVILLE ROOM FOR 100 MORE PEOPLE BE THERE FOR THE PARTY OF A LIFE TIME

BUS RIDE IS AN HOUR LONG AND WILL EVENTUALLY ARRIVE AT A DOWNTOWN COLUMBUS CLUB
TO GET A RIDE BACK FROM THE PICKUP LOCATION YOULL HAVE TO WAIT TILL 2:30 AM
THIS IS ALL NSA!!!