C/D - Cleaning your disgusting ass partner because you're having a rare guest over

It's like we're getting Gear's couch story from the perspective of the emo trucker hat guy.

boxers for casual Friday, briefs for maximum package

also how in the hell is this a C/D thread, at all

burt my music question remains unanswered

burt can i come to the party

MAXIMUM PACKAGE

luftmensch unmentionables

I dunno, Elmo, cleaning for guests is probably a good thing (classic), but it kinda sucks to have to do (dud), so it's pretty up in the air, much like burt's unmentionables

haha xpost! i was gonna say "dainties" but it's burt

ugh you know women can see thru guys who think briefs of manscaping give them "maximum package" fyi

I never, ever torture my friends with my music.

I can totally imagine the day Bruce Stanton came in from chopping firewood, sat his young son on his knee and said "one thing you need to know in life, kid, is that Stantons ain't dainty"

his dad's name is not bruce

thanks bruce, for answering my question

however, his mom's name is Bruce

Maybe I'll throw on the Telescopes or Spacemen 3 if it's just chillin illin

poo-gazer bands

this is a thread of wonder

unmenschionables

i pledge to bump this thread every day forever

dancing under a sky of shit

alternative title for the new U2 album...

I will say it is very magnanimous of you to share your ass partner with your guests, kudos.

Thanks, man. I needed that.

btw classic obv

hey barry_ please keep us updated on what happens with yr chick tonight--i suspect most of ilx will be anxious to know how your evening went

;)

all of you <3

We've already "hooked up", but we're both better as friends. sorry. womp womp.

thats just the ass partner talking, isnt it

what does she look like

okay okay okay but if something more happens tonight, i think it's safe to say that we all wanna know how it went--like if she takes a look at yr crusty drawers, throws on a Einsturzende Neubauten 12 inch on the ol' record player and says TAKE ME NOW BRUCE SIMPSON. . . .

skinny, lots of tattoos. typical shit.

womp womp all night long

what what (in the ass partner)

sucks to your ass partner

"skinny, lots of tattoos. typical shit."

hahaha Burt you rule: you are like a man who lives in a refrigerator in Nigeria thinking his neighbors are weird for not feeling cold

does she like vampire weekend

Does anyone even remember Vampire Weekend? I was right! They were the 2008 version of the Strokes.

good luck miasma

burt are you a "couch painter"?

lol nabisco your refrigerator simile sounds like one of your father's stories.

nabisco made me laugh but this:

"skinny, lots of tattoos. typical shit."

is not really an acceptable way to describe someone who's deigned to sleep with you.

We never have nor never will sleep together. She's bringing other people to this thing. It was about having guests over, not a girl

what was "it" about -- hanging the dirty underwear?

'Twas the night before St. Sales day, when all through the house
Not a creature was stirring, not even a mouse burt
Dirty undies hung over the closets without care
In hopes that 'skinny, lots of tattoos' soon would be there...

'Twas the night before St. Sales day, when all through the house yurt

buttyurt

So that's what's all over the underwear - buttyurt.

I have stained underwear hanging over my closets
I have stained underwear hanging over my closets
I have stained underwear hanging over my closets
I have stained underwear hanging over my closets
I have stained underwear hanging over my closets
I have stained underwear hanging over my closets
I have stained underwear hanging over my closets
I have stained underwear hanging over my closets
I have stained underwear hanging over my closets
I have stained underwear hanging over my closets

I think I know how the underwear became stained btw