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A note on terminology

In the United States, "football" refers to American Football. Outside the United States, "football" refers to soccer

Evidently they've never seen Australians, New Zealanders, or Canadians play football....

Swimming relays are demoted to a "joke sport" because real relays use batons, but they don't use them in swim races. Duh - you'd whack the swimmer in the next lane with the baton with every butterfly stroke.

Damn liberals soiling the purity of relay sports by not requiring batons in the pool. It's yet another cog in the culture of permissiveness the liberal establishment is forcing on all of us through sport, comics, television, and music.

during the Modern Olympic Games, the pagan origins of the Olympics have been replaced by faith-based achievement by the participating athletes.

Women's boxing and wrestling

This is the most revealing (not that misogyny needs to be outed with these guys). Why would a sport shift from non-joke to joke just based on the gender of those involved. Well, whatever - they're an irrelevant bunch of anti-intellectual fools.

Would love to see Katie Taylor or Nicola Adams in a ring with Andrew Schlafly and still see if he thinks it's a joke sport.

Let me explain where the socialism section came from. I had seen on the main page that day, there was a front page news entry from a blog (possibly two or three blogs) comparing soccer to socialism. I don't remember if the blogs were being serious or satirical, but it was on the front page of Conservapedia. I then happened to stumble on the Soccer article and noticed it had been changed to "a popular Socialist football sport" with no explanation given.

with no explanation given.

solitary comments that effortlessly summarise the spirit of conservapedia

Boxing is still very popular, possibly having roots in ancient Greek styles of boxing, although with certain and clearly defined roots in the bare-knuckle fights in England in the early-modern era, being given modern rules in the 19th century by the Marquess of Queensbury.
When women participate in it, boxing is a joke sport.

The other female sports you list seem more legitimate than women's boxing. Women's boxing appears to be particularly artificial - how often are there schoolyard boxing matches between girls?--Andy Schlafly 19:55, 9 August 2012 (EDT)

God I remember all the schoolyard sports we used to play. Boxing, football, synchronised swimming, F1 racing.

http://conservapedia.com/index.php?title=Soccer&diff=prev&oldid=952246

* The "no hands" rule can be compared to socialist tax policies.
* The "off-sides" rule prohibits using certain aggressive ("unfair") tactics in the game.
* The game forbids frequent stops, which can be compared to "carbon footprint" efforts to fight supposed [[global warming]].

* gun use is not permitted -- what is the goalie protecting, if not his castle?

cheers crüt

Dudes, Andy writes this shit to reinforce his own beliefs, not to convince others

"schoolyard boxing matches"

Ali-Frazier III, Chacon-Limon IV, chubby kid with daddy issues vs. kid who threw chocolate milk on his head

The United States has won the overall medal race, for the fifth straight Summer Games. [2] But are joke sports ruining it?

Political Questions Being Resolved by the Games

!

LOL

http://conservapedia.com/Overrated_Sports_Stars

Peyton Manning — a quarterback who won only one NFL championship, despite being voted by the media and others to be NFL MVP 4 times, AFC Player of the Year 6 times, and Pro Bowler 11 times. The liberal media treated him like the Second Coming of Christ in order to oust conservative Tim Tebow from his leadership position in the swing state of Colorado prior to the Presidential Election 2012.

the "talk" pages are always great & the "overrated sports stars" one is a special treat

Sol Campbell — Is known to be sympathetic towards homosexual rights campaigners. During his England career they failed to win a single major tournament.

him and about 2000 other fuckers

LeBron wasn't my addition but the hype for him seems a bit much. Perhaps his unusual name helps.--Andy Schlafly 22:01, 24 June 2012 (EDT)\

yeah that's prob. it

Peyton Manning was a huge bush donor iirc

It is no coincidence that the fit and healthy Bible believing martial artist Chuck Norris lives in the state of Texas and not the city of San Francisco! Chuck Norris is no "Nancy boy" and he is the embodiment of mental toughness.

i recently found out about this

http://images.amazon.com/images/G/01/richmedia/images/cover.gif

what would conservapedia think?

hm seems that didn't work.

http://ecx.images-amazon.com/images/I/51z7ROE8ZvL._SL500_AA300_.jpg

!!!

http://conservapedia.com/Essay:Quantifying_Openmindedness

Do you deny that the imposition of socialism and same-sex marriage on a nation could harm its competitiveness at international events like the Olympics?

oh Andy

This man was educated at Princeton and Harvard. The fuck?

I wonder if Obama remembers him

intelligence is no defense against believing weird shit. Check out the academic accomplishments of his mother, too.

Smart people are equally capable of believing plenty of bollocks for non-smart reasons; they can just be better at rationalizing it.

no he's really dumb

if he was smart he would be working for the heritage foundation or something

Will there be joke sports or athletes with joke religions in the next olympic games?

Create the page "Schafly" on this wiki!

lol i misspelled it

I think I found the best one you guys
http://conservapedia.com/Best_of_the_public

yeah, that's a good one

Link to Invisible Hand of Marriage also pretty hilarious.

"Best of the Public"...yup...here I am, pointlessly angry again

Conservative Bible Project also a winner for sheer distance from how reality works:

Benefits include:

* mastery of the Bible, which is priceless
* mastery of the English language, which is valuable
* thorough understanding of the differences in Bible translations, particularly the historically important King James Version
* benefiting from activity that no public school would ever allow; a Conservative Bible could become a text for public school courses
* political issues can become a pathway to evangelizing liberals
* liberals will oppose this effort, but they will have to read the Bible to criticize this, and that will open their minds
* this project has a unifying effect on various Christian denominations, and serves as an important counterweight to liberal efforts to divide conservative candidates based on religion

The Conservative Bible Project is a truly outstanding example of something produced by committee. A particularly cloth-eared and cloth-headed committee in this case.

I keep on clicking links in that Best of the Public page expecting to read something sensible and informative.

"Ice Ice Baby" was the "B-side" filler panned by "experts" which became a massive hit because a disc jockey played it by chance; allegedly written by Vanilla Ice when he was 16[9]

truly the best of the public

Another liberal double standard: "Colorado U. to segregate dorms for students with gun permits." [15] Isn't segregation wrong???

see also: prisons

Why one bathroom for men and one for women, you hypocrites?

Oh man, the weirdest debate I ever got into with my bro-in-law was about coed bathrooms. It basically boiled down to him thinking there is an essentially sexual component to elimination, so men and women who aren't married shouldn't be shitting in the same space.