God bless the goddamn Onion

the onion's had a hardon for superman for awhile - http://www.theonion.com/content/node/30382

whose balls are you, i am lookinf for mine

http://fanaticking.com/photos/Michael_Vick_Dog.jpg

i kinda forgot abt the onion but this was posted on the quantum mechanic thread and it is funnee
http://www.theonion.com/content/news/scientists_ask_congress_to_fund_50

They've really been on a roll with the cartoons - they're probably my favorite thing in the Onion now.

http://www.theonion.com/content/files/images/Cartoon-Cage-Free-Eggs.jpg

One of my more flattering caricatures.

Ha.

I also really love that every so often there will be an editorial cartoon about the cartoonist's ex-wife.

lol
http://www.theonion.com/content/files/images/Cartoon-Freak-Dancing.jpg

I read the last word wrong and thought this was gonna be about
http://content.answers.com/main/content/wp/en/thumb/3/37/250px-Vina.jpg

http://www.theonion.com/content/files/images/Teens-Turning-Backs.jpg

http://content.answers.com/main/content/wp/en/thumb/3/37/250px-Vina.jpg
who's that on the right? Jabba the Hutt?

http://www.theonion.com/content/news/mel_brooks_starts_nonprofit

http://www.theonion.com/content/files/images/KellyKlassicMujahideen.article.jpg

o shi i hadn't seen these cartoons before -- awesome.

"After my baby didn't babble or gesture after 12 months, I hoped the cause was autism. I've since learned he's dead."

Haha OMG:

First Indian-American Governor Elected

With his swearing in as governor of Louisiana on Monday, Republican Bobby Jindal became the first Indian-American to head a U.S. state. What do you think?

Dave Piedmont,
Systems Analyst
"His parents must be so close to being proud."

Steven Seagal is...

http://www.theonion.com/content/opinion/act_now_to_take_advantage_of_my

story of my life

lol "Skeepers"

haha deja vu

me: http://www.theonion.com/content/opinion/act_now_to_take_advantage_of_my
Sent at 4:31 PM on Wednesday
Jordan: haha
lol "skeepers"

http://www.theonion.com/content/files/images/act_now_oped.jpg

: /

that's totally the lowered-standards look

... anonymous sex with me that I'll begin to regret it as it's happening?
oh double-edged zing

http://www.theonion.com/content/node/75350

Haha, i worked at the Skeepers in Ann Arbor from '98 - '00.

http://www.theonion.com/content/files/images/onionmagazine_archive_101a.jpg

"Microwave Quietly Encouraged"

the onion magazine + editorial cartoons are my fav shit now

Kelly is a genius.

http://www.theonion.com/content/opinion/you_know_whats_stupid

One of my fave pieces for a long time, great concept.

Bob can go fuck himself for those shoes/boots.

wow that link is one of the least funny Onion pieces I've read. Diff'rent strokes.

I think it's funny.

that craig kilborn bit they did a few months ago (which i conveniently cannot find a link to right now) was one of the best things they've ever done

wow that link is one of the least funny Onion pieces I've read. Diff'rent strokes.

-- wanko ergo sum, Saturday, 15 March 2008 17:25

Think it's because this character = almost everybody I work with.

They have trouble understanding complex, intellectual ideas like "Maybe not every problem with the UK today can be blamed on asylum seekers."

http://www.theonion.com/content/video/in_the_know_is_the_government

I think it's funny.

yeah, i like it too. I usually enjoy their "explicitly deconstructing thoughtless everyday habits" bits.

Haha this joke would appear to be entirely coincidental, and yet ...

COLUMN: Smoove B signs off -- "Girl, there comes a time when even a strong, well-dressed man must admit defeat."

AMERICAN VOICES TOPIC: "Farmers Planting Less Corn"

i'm dying here.

cherry coke all over my monitor

The Onion Movie is surprisingly terrible

surprisingly

""

Oh, I didn't know we don't like the Onion here anymore.

ILX = It's the British press for your iphone!

yeah wtf happened with the onion movie. The books were always great.

liking the onion and thinking that "onion: the movie" is a terrible idea are two completely different things. that's probably what Hurting 2 meant since he usually states the obvious, don't act dense and butthurt about it If Assholes Could Fly This Place Would Be An Airport.

If Assholes Were Butthurt This Place Would Be A Butt Hospice

If arseholes were Robbie Williams's last CD this place would be a road in China.

Onion movie = not actually made by The Onion, who disassociated themselves from it long ago..

Ah, I did not know that. Figures...

https://www.theonion.com/it-is-journalism-s-sacred-duty-to-endanger-the-lives-of-1850126997

Boiling the piss of the right people.

It’s a source of wonder to me that this guy once made a living out of writing comedy. Now he’s… this. Transphobia rots the brain, kids. pic.twitter.com/DHmSxABvoo

— Paul Duane 🏳️‍⚧️ (@paulduanefilm) February 17, 2023

https://www.theonion.com/evangelical-leaders-announce-j-k-rowling-finally-bigot-1850129128

loll

A meme from somewhere that I saw on discord.

https://cdn.discordapp.com/attachments/886401332460793896/1081998660407136380/IMG_4542.png

https://www.theonion.com/texas-bans-consensual-sex-1848631845

https://www.theonion.com/j-k-rowling-announces-she-no-longer-transphobic-after-1850432981

kelly reaching the stars

https://www.instagram.com/p/CvIsExgu4RJ/

Is that on the Onion, or somewhere else publicly viewable?

https://www.theonion.com/curbed-emissions-1850673988

Kelly watch the stars

It’s great that through all the ownership and editorship changes of the Onion he is still there. Ward Sutton did a great cartoon (Ward’s Cleaver) under his real name for alt weeklies when those existed. And he went to my Alma Mater!

https://www.theonion.com/the-onion-stands-with-israel-because-it-seems-like-yo-1850922505

good shit

https://www.theonion.com/report-free-dead-bodies-buried-underground-seemingly-f-1850942454