Let's bitch about our stupid, annoying co-workers

Jesus. Someone should direct them to this handy guide from a US court, where WordPerfect is still the only official word processing software hxxp://www.ilnd.uscourts.gov/home/cmecf/pdfs/v40/4-0_Create%20PDF%20from%20WordPerfect.pdf

I read a little about why WP is still so prevalent in the legal field, esp in federal courts and it seems like price and inertia are the biggest factors. One story from Federal Computer Week Magazine (!) said many members of the legal community prefer WordPerfect because of a function that allows users to view and edit formatting codes. They also like the software’s ability to display a variety of legal tools. But that reason seems like it at least partly falls under "Inertia" b/c Word can reveal formatting codes. IDK which legal tools they are referring to though.

these legal tools:
http://www.attorneymarketing.com/wp-content/uploads/2011/12/30/how-to-promote-your-legal-services-without-feeling-sleazy/340x_4c99dbb11f1be7c3c4.jpg
http://bankruptcygurus.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/07/0183.jpg

hahaha THE HAMMER!

There are all sorts of legal tools for MS Word. smdh at these Word Perfect clingers. Also never underestimate inertia when you're dealing with lawyers and/or the government.

acc to wiki WordPerf doesn't seem all that bad? I mean not as bad as companies who are forced to keep machines running Win98 bcz some crucial piece of software was coded w VB6 and has never been updated (acc to my dad it's actually just cheaper a lot of times to keep selling outdated software that only works on obsolete machines)

No it's really terrible.

some moe syzlack type dude who sits behind me is getting on my shit. i got the vibes after a few weeks, but was confirmed today. did a good job and people went "yeah! spectrum!", and he came up to my cube and spouted some random-ass gibberish he was working on like he was gonna "get me" or something "oh yeah? do you know the g585890b on the spreadsheet??". this is the first time he's come up to speak to me in about a month. i'm like "yeah, good job dude" to kill the tension, but i think i'm done dealing with these trogs who get on me for being competent, particularly when i'm nice and respectful.

Crying out loud.

Two “colleagues” just having a chat about Friday’s opening Olympic ceremony, saying how bad it was and how they wanted Danny Boyle’s head on a spike. I kept my headphones on and pretended I couldn’t hear because I know how these things always end if I get involved.

I liked the ceremony, and understand why a lot of people wouldn’t, or didn’t, like it, but this really is Aidan Burley level…and I think, for the 5900th time in the last ten years, why am I working with people like this? Petty, pathetic, inadequate and I think beyond help. It reminds me that I ought to set about finding another way of making a living, maybe in another country, because this is just driving me nuts.

Air-conditioning wars.

It's 27C and v humid at our end of the office. I'm all sweaty and can't concentrate. But because it gets a bit cold at the other end of the office we can't have the A/C on. Why those fuckers can't just put a fucking jumper on is beyond me, it's not like I can sit around naked here.

Sounds like whoever planned and designed your office should have thought about it a bit more.

I am a firm believer that if you are cold, you put on a sweater because I sure as shit can't take anything else off.

My coworker asked if she could turn the heat on last Friday. It was around 90 F. She wanted the heat on because she was wearing a shirt skirt and short sleeves and still cannot get it together to bring a sweater to work despite having worked here for going on nine years. I just ignored her because if I had responded it would have been very mean.

Oh she tried to turn the heat on, but of course the heat is off in the building so it did nothing. And still, she doesn't bring a sweater.

don't be coy colonel poo - take yer top off

Ugh, my boss always adjusts the AC because one person is always cold. Meanwhile, I am always sweating to death.

Hurrah! One of the directors turned up and now the A/C is on. No striptease was necessary.

It reminds me that I ought to set about finding another way of making a living, maybe in another country, because this is just driving me nuts.

Trust me, there are annoying people like that in every country.

Last week it was 27C in the office and the woman who always complains it's too cold complained that it was too hot all day instead! Which was good because she let me open a window and have my fan on, but I could not work out what the fuck was so different from 2 days before when it was 26C in the office and I asked if I could open the window and she said "oh, but it's so cold and the wind will blow my papers away" (it was not windy that day at all and she's in the furthest corner from the window), so I turned my desk fan on instead and she whinged about it being noisy until I turned it off.

(everyone has these noisy little desk fans except her; she moved the one big silent fan from the corner to her desk and never uses it)

i am in such a cranky mood and i could not stop my eyes from involuntarily rolling at this meeting i was just in, i mean you [coworker] are so anxious and nervous and fretful about everything that i just want you to reLAX, and maybe it would be less annoying if you weren't the supervisor but you are, so we have to spend hours and hours (ok not really hours) just going through your neuroses one by one like trying to calm little chickens that won't stop running around everywhere

People I work with like to take wads of paper towels and use them as improvised gloves so they don't have to touch anything in the bathroom. I am somewhat sympathetic as our bathroom is a filthy shit hole, often quite literally but this also results in there constantly CONSTANTLY being piles of paper towels on the backs of the toilets, stuffed into the used pad receptacles that only get emptied once in a while so that they don't close and the aroma of used feminine hygiene products can waft freely into the rest of the bathroom, scattered on the floor, clogging up some of the toilets.

Anyway, they took out the paper towels and replaced them with two hand dryers (good ones with the crazy strong airflow, shockingly) and people are BUGGING THE FUCK OUT. And I think it's hilarious. Although I do miss having a paper towel to use to turn off the faucet.

Our bathroom is like that too and it drives me fucking nuts. Germophobes drive me up a wall. If I remember (or if someone judgy seeming is watching) I'll open the door with my shoulder instead of putting my hand on the handle but otherwise I touch everything except the toilet handle but only because I now know that everyone else touches it with their freaking feet! The wads of paper towels in our bathroom are insane. By 5 o'clock it looks like someone just opened a pack and threw it around in there. Way grosser (and wasteful) to me than any possible germs on the handles.

I can't count the number of times in a week I hear someone say the words "Can you still sign in with my login?"

Why do I need these passwords and phone codes anyway.

maybe it would be less annoying if you weren't the supervisor but you are, so we have to spend hours and hours (ok not really hours) just going through your neuroses one by one like trying to calm little chickens that won't stop running around everywhere

this is my boss too!

In other germaphobia news, the smell of scented hand sanitizers has been grossing me out lately. Just wash your hands!!!

I'm never sure what thread to post stuff like this in but:

"Huh, I've never seen that before. I wonder what it is, what the Jew walking by is wearing."

THE JEW

sigh

lol i just met a co-worker in the bathroom and as we were exiting I was first so grabbed the handle to push the door and she starts swatting me with a paper towel going "Ew! Don't touch that!" *swat* *swat*

This is the butt smacker btw who last week said to me "Damn girl, you have a nice butt! You always hide that under skirts but you should show that off more often!" I think maybe this is OK as we're now sort of friends. We even went shopping together last weekend. She still says weird shit without thinking but it's more entertaining than anything else. She's definitely redeemed herself since the ovaries incident.

lol i just met a co-worker in the bathroom and as we were exiting I was first so grabbed the handle to push the door and she starts swatting me with a paper towel going "Ew! Don't touch that!" *swat* *swat*

― (✿◠‿◠) (ENBB)

Tell her since everyone else uses paper towels on the door, it's perfectly clean.

That's exactly what I said to her tbh.

word for word

Ha, I would do that here but no one does the "Ewww" thing.

I'm never sure what thread to post stuff like this in but:

"Huh, I've never seen that before. I wonder what it is, what the Jew walking by is wearing."

???? Obvious problem aside, how did they ID the person as a Jew?

(Also, at first I thought the person was saying "what the Jew" as an exclamation "what the Jew is that person wearing?!" )

There were two Hasidic Jews walking by and one was wearing a prayer shawl over his shirt.

I also worked with someone who described someone on SNL as "the young Jew." I think she meant Andy Samberg.

Hey at least they didnt call them hymies like my dad once did loudly in the street :/

If the person in front of me doesn't stop laughing her goofy and extremely loud guffaw I'm going to eviscerate her with my Game of Thrones Needle replica letter opener.

Actually it's a WHINNY. Yes, you heard me.

I've got two of the most annoying laughers I've ever heard within 20 feet of me and they both go steadily throughout the day, every single day. So I feel your pain.

One is a whinny, the other more of a stuttering cackle.

Iow I will STICK HER WITH THE POINTY END.

Is this person related to the donkey that works with darraghmac, I wonder?

I have a co-worker who laughs like Phyllis Diller. O_o

i will take people laughing over people yelling any day.

Was in the bathroom washing my fork when a coworker came in and started raging about the hand dryers and how all they did was use HOT AIR to BLOW GERMS around the bathroom because heat creates germs, right? "Right..." I said because I didn't want to get into an argument with an angry coworker when all I was armed with was a fork. She waved her hand at the floor, which was dirty with gray spots that I think are from a combo of regular floor dirty and water that spatters from peoples' hands as they traverse the bathroom to use the hand dryers*, and said, "You can see all the bacteria and spores all over the floor because the hot hair just blows the germs right down there!" I just took my fork and went back to my desk.

Earlier today she complimented me on the blouse I am wearing by saying, "That is a nice blouse. It reads well. I can really tell." Tell what? TELL WHAT????

*The worst thing about the hand dryers, IMO, is that they put them across the room from the sinks instead of to the right or left where there is space so the floor in the bathroom is always wet.

co-worker referred to above said something bitchy aloud about a project i wrote. this dude's riding my back, made more annoying by the fact that he sits behind me. done everything to be nice and respectful. what should i do here? have it out with him? talk to my boss? guy's getting on my nerves, and he's trying to be the gunner of the office, which only makes it more annoying.

Manager(s), I am so fucking sorry for making any effort whatsoever to go above my most basic duties as a stock person at your horribly fucking run and inventory systemless (!!!) store. I very foolishly thought that alerting you to forgotten products on our backstock shelves or errors in our system would somehow be beneficial in selling more shit and completely failed to realize how much more inconvenient it would make your jobs. I was under the impression that suggesting and implementing more efficient + thorough methods of completing departmental tasks would somehow benefit anything or anyone at all ever and totally dropped the ball by not recognizing that you prefer unnecessary work that makes us look busy to actually-quantifiable increases in sales and productivity. Please just do us both a favor and fire me or stab me in the fucking face.

I'm going to hope for choice A because it would 1) leave you free for DC housesitting and 2) spare your awesome face!

never having seen your face, i'm indifferent.

If you get stabbed in the face for a work related reason and didn't instigate the fight and live in IL you can get workers' comp benefits.