slaves, tell me about 50 Shades of Grey

my wife's fb feed has been full of Midwestern moms posting e.g. "reading 50 Shades & my husband is getting sore from all the pounding" so I'm just happy nice people are getting megalaid out of this

This Thomas Tallis fellow makes me want to convert to Catholicism.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=J6RgaPTo4hE

On the flight from Auckland to San Francisco I sat next to a woman about my age who was reading 50 Shades of Grey. I was about midway through the new Stephen King and was not at all tired, so basically her and I had this mini-readathon for almost the whole flight - there was never a time when we were both not either reading or sleeping, but mostly reading.

I'd seen the books at every airport during my trip but I didn't know anything about them so now I'm like ...well they can't be written any better than Twilight or she'd have been running off to the bathroom the whole time, lol

Also consider this: Muse inspired S Meyer to write Twilight. and now Snow Patrol/Kings of Leon inspire 50 Shades of Grey.
I think we need some kind of master plan to deal with these poisonous influences.

Are we about due for a terrible sexy pirate book inspired by The Script?

Movie soundtrack to include Kaizer Chiefs?

Louis XIV iirc

Ball gag with a skull and crossbones on it

Strap-on hook

Some of the most disturbing parrot sex in contemporary literature

A Red Room of T-PAIN, where they AutoTune the fuck out of you.

You beat me by 2 seconds, I was about to just post "Sex Parrot"

We need to get a Captain Morgan tie-in deal on this, too.

50 men shit on a dead girl's chest, yo ho yo ho

Perfection.

I kind of want to turn this into a Tallis thread

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=B9BnqgvHCNw

Can someone explain to me, actually, the phenomenon of women posting about reading this book on facebook? You don't really see guys posting "Ready for a relaxing evening -- a sixer of Sierras in the fridge and Anal Sluts 3 in the DVD player, lol!"

and really, thank god for that

I know, i mean i'm assuming whoever posted upthread about seeing that sort thing on his fb feed was exaggerating, but still it sort of boggles my mind

http://answers.yahoo.com/question/index?qid=20120501163509AAQHAVt

i mean, not mentioning reading it, but more the added comments about sex life with their husband

i guess it ties in to the mass popularity/acceptance thing

I don't think it's exaggeration. I have seen TONS of people on Twitter mentioning that they're reading it. Like, every woman I know. (Although one of them tweeted the other day: "#FiftyShadesOfGrey I just finished it. Gotta say it did very little for me. What's up with all the women that go cuh-razy for it? #NotSoSexy.")

xp obvs

You can still read the original online but googling the title (posted upthread) + pdf. just fyi.

my stepmom brought it up at dinner the other night. and my dumbest coworker tried to convince us all to read it.

can anyone confirm or deny that the so-called tampon scene actually appears in the book? my belief in god depends on the answer, thx

He sets a punishing rhythm – in, out, and he reaches around and finds my clitoris, massaging me… oh jeez. I can feel myself quicken.

50 Shades of Grey: The Quickening

are they having sex or making bread

Oh jeez.

I am lolling hard at "oh jeez"

oops, there goes my skirt down under my feet, oh jeez

^^^ lolz

Oh, jeez. Argh.

“That’s right, baby,” he rasps as he grinds into me

Hahaha are you FUCKING KIDDING ME? This woman is now a MULTI-MILLIONAIRE for this?

a few comments down on that thread:

Originally in the fic he threw [the tampon] on the floor. When fans got insanely grossed out, she changed it to the toilet.

i don't know what's worse, throwing a used tampon on the floor or actively reminding the reader that all the sexy action is happening next to a toilet.

"oh jeez. oh gosh golly. oh... goodness! heavens to betsy!"

he raps as he grinds

it's just depressing i guess "the power of marketing". i've not read much airport bookstore kinda genre fiction but i get the idea that much of that stuff is at least very well-crafted

chapter in future version of "extraodinary popular delusions..." book: in 2012 tens of thousands of ppl convinced themselves that a poorly-written fanfiction novel was sexy

"I like big butts and I cannot lie," he raps as he grinds into me.

so basically the lead woman in this is a young Edie McClurg?

Or Eddie Murphy's Aunt Bunny.

I mean it can't ONLY be the power of marketing, otherwise it would be much easier to create runaway bestsellers like this, I'd think.

This author and her publisher just somehow, perhaps accidentally, found a way to package porn so that it's palatable to the average non-porn-consuming woman, and the timing was right. Maybe Mad Men opened the door for it a bit?

wait waht

Mad Men is lady porn?

Rich, powerful suit-wearing man will show you who's boss but not too much.

"well how do you like them apples!" i exclaim, as he grasps my underpants and tears them off my body

looool

Are you guys unfamiliar with romance novels? I opened up one of those harlequin paperbacks once and the first sentence I read was 'his penis was erect'. Pretty porny.

"Whip me again!" I groan, "it's really kewl!"