SO U MOVING TO HSTNGS! PACK A AMPULE OF ANTIVENOM AND A FACK FULL OF EMINEM

Say hi to Asia for me! Be safe and happy and give my love to J

PS Your screen name is killing me. Please keep it for a while longer. I stop noticing it and then BAM! I'M THAT POSTA, AAAAAAAAAH ROFL

This just in: Asia is REALLY FAR AWAY

I just received an email message from someone with almost my identical email address titled "Who the hell is this and y r u in my wifes email contacts"; no message body.

I am tempted to answer back "I am you from the future after you've noticed that our email addresses are almost identical"

i think it would be funnier to respond with "hold on you fuck why are you in my wifes email contact list?!???" and see how he sorts that one out

I really like both of these options. Or you could just start snapping pictures of random women in bars or hotel lobbies and email them with the subject lines like:

"Is this your wife?"
"Wait, is *this* your wife?"
"I'm doing my best, here. What about this one?"

lolllllll please tell me how this really sorted out, bc I mean WOW

I haven't responded yet. Currently contemplating sending him sissymanwhore's blogspot link.

haha

hahaha

hi from your airport

lindbergh or humphrey? where u goin'? also hi

lindbergh! going home to seattle from boston.

v nice. home-bound trip is bittersweet; worn out from vacation and ready for your own bed, but vacation is over...

exactly that, well stated.

it's a nice airport. gigantic, though!

Glad you enjoyed our airport, wish somehow we could have all seen YOU!

DID YOU RIDE THE MOVING SIDEWALK

aw src, me too! next time through we'll schedule a layover and meet up with you all!

jjj, SO MANY MOVING SIDEWALKS!

Those moving sidewalks are weirdly enjoyable, aren't they... best fun at the airport short of meeting Larry Craig, of course.

he's the foot tapper, right? did not meet him, fortunately. might have been in the wrong part of the airport for that.

i wanted to buy all of the snacks at those cibo markets.

also, the smoking section outside the terminal has a hut with a heater you can activate by pushing a button. i tried to sit in it but it was the hottest place on earth even without the heater switched on. jergins smartly suggested it was built with ice fishing in mind.

It is usually a LOT colder here at this time of year... I imagine those smoking/heater areas are brilliant in cold weather!

Yes, Larry Craig was the foot tapper and no, I imagine you didn't go into the men's bathroom, lxy. Maybe jergins could have gotten lucky.

you guys

I hate O'Hare so much

like, to the point where I wish it was a person so I could murder it

I am kind of sad that you're already back. I want you to be trapsing through the East for months, having an escalating series of zany adventures.

PS how was your trip?

It was AWESOME

I wish I was made of money so we could have just kept going

I want him to go back, have the zany adventures, and have the rest of us be randomly joining him so that we create a posse of ridiculous gaijin with HSTNGS connections.

Later this should become a cult film of some kind.

Our spouses/partners should all be along, making witty side commentary.

would join

I hate that we are not making this happen somehow!!!

I am in Duluth, so I am doing my part?

I don't want to do this, but I'm going to say yes. Just be sure to toss off a few random Japanese phrases before you come home.

My favorite is "Sha-waa o obimasu." ("I'm taking a shower.")

hey guys, wanna go to Phuket

Phuket, why not?

yay

one step closer to my life goal of recreating key scenes from The Beach

I call punching the shark and not getting bitten by the shark and getting dragged into the forrest to die alone in horrible agony.

I call running through the tall grass high pretending I'm in a Super Mario Brothers game

...right before you pop up out of the grass and growl at your friends to get them killed

man, what a ridiculous movie

Yeah, but I loved that movie. I can't defend it, but I loved it.

oh me too, I mean it is exactly the right type of ridiculous

Crap, I have never even heard of that movie! I hope I can still get a part in Phuket.

It's an OK movie. I never actually recommend it to anyone because there are probably hundreds of other worthy movies one should see. It's kind of a fantasy movie built around the chauvinism and limits of being a tourist, and the un-sustainability of planned communities. I feel like if I spend any more time treating it critically, I'm wasting my time.

Still, it was a fun ride. Most people are meh. I was woo-hoo!

^^^ exactly OTM

it is probably my favorite DiCaprio movie aside from possibly The Departed exactly for the reasons AP mentions

I still love Gilbert Grape, but The Beach is the only movie in which Dicaprio feels like a natural fit.

ha very OTM

Interesting. I always forget that DiCaprio can actually act because he's so damn pretty that it just distracts me. Kind of like Brad Pitt.

(I think we know I don't care for pretty men, right? I mean, I'm sure they are nice and all, but I often forget that they might be interesting or talented.)

lol

RIP pretty men

it's realy sad, they were pretty

A nurse practitioner friend of mine was telling me a horrific/hilarious story about a supervisor on his floor at a previous hospital job who was having a fit because the receptionist wasn't at her desk one morning at 9:00; when the receptionist did show up, she (a black woman) was wearing a head wrap because he hair wasn't done and the supervisor lit into her on the floor in front of everyone and ended with the line "... and who do you think you are with that hair wrap, Aunt Jemima?"

Obv this created an HR shitstorm that led to the supervisor delivering the following apology: "I'm sorry, I didn't mean to call you Aunt Jemima; you looked more like Mrs. Butterworth."

I mean, seriously

oh my god