Let's Win the New Yorker Caption Contest

"Man she was so ugly it was kind of a relief"

I find it's simplified things for me.

The best part was when she ate my head.

The King of Queens is a much funnier show than I ever realized.

Yeah, I've heard there can be side effects, but my hayfever's completely cured.

One look in her eyes, and I completely lost my head.

So I said 'let them eat grasshoppers'...

I think I left my wallet back at that restaurant.

The King of Queens is a much funnier show than I ever realized.

"Worth it."

"I could really go for some pizza right now. That's right, I can't. I have no head. Aaaaaaagh!"

"Funnily enough, it's the little things I miss. Like my head."

"I get it, it's hard not to stare. Well, not for me."

"I thought she was only like that with me"

haha

"i have to end this. The sound of our colliding neck nubs is sickening when we kiss. Tell my daughter that I love her."

"I'm sure she won't notice. Just act nonchalant."

"Now we'll never be astronauts"

"Christ, what a neckhole"

"I got someone to look it up on Wikipedia. Apparently, this is normal"

"But I got the villa, my pension entitlements are safe and the kids are mine for the holidays, so, y'know...."

"Walk it off."

"it's just that we don't seem to have anything in common"

"I can't believe you played "Heads or Tails" after seeing what happened to me."

"I think those new boner pills are a little TOO good."

she told me i was the one

women eh? can't live with 'em, can't live without 'em.
unlike heads, dave.
keenly observed, barry. keenly observed.

Is there a new one to caption?

"marco"
― Wesley Crusher: Teenage F#ck Machine (forksclovetofu), Tuesday, March 20, 2012 10:40 AM Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

this actually made me laugh, it cannot win
― i don't believe in zimmerman (Hurting 2), Tuesday, March 20, 2012

this won btw

But isn't it the woman on the side of the pool who appears to be talking?

forks I saw that it was nom'd and was psyched. didn't know it won.

http://www.newyorker.com/images/2012/04/23/p465/120423_contest_p465.jpg

"Christ, what an asshole"

oh yeah, also awesome that it won!

"What is this joker, blind? The left lane is wide open."

"I am driving a Mini and therefore I deserve death"

"that may look like a ufo that is immediately behind us but it is actually a streetlamp that is in the foreground. representing three dimensions in a two-dimensional medium can be difficult."

go forks!

"did you bring condoms?"

"i'm so glad that i just had my anus whitened"

"Maybe it's time we upgraded to a space barge."

"Orson will be pleased."

"Fuck, I hate cops."

"You first."

"You've got your papers, right?"

"What is this joker, blind? The left lane is wide open."

― s.clover, Monday, April 16, 2012 5:41 PM Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

I feel like this cartoon immediately suggests about a thousand variations on this basic theme.

"i didn't do anything wrong, this is just another case of 'driving while human'"

"Not again. My ass is still full of eggs from the last time."

"Wow, I always figured those "Speed Limit Enforced By Aircraft" signs were just scare tactics"

"Highway 61? More like AREA 51, amirite?"