the bizarre poetry of spam emails

*I am sorry to encroach
*into your privacy in this
*manner,
*I found you listed in
*the Trade Centre Chambers
*of Commerce
*directory here in Japan,
*I find it pleasurable to
*offer you
*my partnership in business,
*I only pray at this time that
*your address is still valid.
*I want to solicit your
*attention to receive money on
*my behalf. The purpose of
*my contacting you is because
*my status would not permit
*me to do this alone.
*If interested, please reply,
*In replying kindly state
*the following: Your full
*names, Age, and Location :
*Regards,Okauchi

What the thread title refers to as "bizarre poetry" would more accurately be called "word salad".

how about the computer generated poetry of google translate?

L’entrée en matière se fait d’autorité sur l’air somnambulique du Sleepwalker - stroboscopie et autohypnose, mode d’emploi. Voix dedans, filtrées à la Alan «Collision Drive» Vega, rythmique rock medium de la même farine zonzonnante à plaisir, tonalités laminées au bain de guitares synthétisées, circumnavigation en stase bouclée, l’horizon est : la danse de l’ours psychédélique. Circles est lancé. Le thème-et-variations statique qui suit varie peu ou prou cette matrice comitiale au chant planant robotisé, aux arrangements en pilotage automatique atonal plus ou moins gourd, ébloui de flashs (Sparks), sur tempo medium.

Translates to

The entrance is in authority over the somnambulistic air Sleepwalker - stroboscopy and self-hypnosis manual. Voice in, the filtered Alan "Collision Drive" Vega, rhythmic rock medium flour zonzonnante the same at pleasure, tone rolled bath synthesized guitars, looped circumnavigation in stasis, the horizon: the psychedelic dancing bear. Circles is launched. The theme-and-variations static varies more or less follows this matrix epileptic vocals hovering robotic arrangements on autopilot atonal more or less tough, dazzling flashes (Sparks), on medium tempo.

From: Mrs Judith Williams.

My name is Mrs Judith Williams am 75yrs old of age, i stay in new york

city, USA.I am a good merchant, I have several industrial companies

and good share in various banks in the world.I spend all my life on

investment and coporate business. all the way i lost my husband and two

beautiful kids in fatal accident that occur in November 5th 2003.

I am a very greedy woman with all cost i dont know much and care about

people, since when I have an experience of my it difficult to sleep

and give rest.

Subject: hi

How are the things.

and also:

Subject: HI

hi asshole! How are your children?

tone rolled bath synthesized guitars, looped circumnavigation in stasis, the horizon: the psychedelic dancing bear.

dooh dah getting the same spam email as me!!!!

hi asshole! How are your children?

lmao

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Andrew Woolfolk to the band.
Note that the lower half of the XMM register is unaffected by this operation. Smith's long and distinguished tenure, the institution moves to its permanent site on Murchison Road in 1907.
On 7 November 1980, Frank Duff died at the age of 91. Name was wrong when I created the page. It was followed by a second spacecraft on 7 November 1995.
Upon their arrival the inhabitants fled the city and locked themselves inside the citadel. Crop damage caused by bharal has also been seen.
New York Times, August 25, 2008.
And then they came for the Jews. Centre Le Cavalier, Place Lasalle was one of the first indoor malls of LaSalle. Margulis was a contributing editor at Mothering magazine and wrote a blog on the Mothering. Gardens in the Modern Landscape.
It has seasonal camping available, both serviced and unserviced. A study to convert U.
These heavyweight dragons have interbred in a manner that has increased their intelligence. Israeli leadership condemns the act and the organizers of the larger group of worshippers agree to pay for damages.
Lieutenant Michelle LaCroix is another officer in the NSA.

o_o

my spam scam emails have moved into some kind of paradoxical ultrarealist phase, the scam of the month is now addressed

dear scam victim

and offers to help me recover up to $500000 from the WORLD BANK/UNITED NATIONS for past victimization of an unspecified nature

Message: So many things in particular: Advisor productivity, improving distribution margins by better managing expenses and profit goals and thus, the act of speaking japaneseese., casino online, http://theonlinecasinosverige.com/"">casino online, egynsk,

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Observed gary getting married so excited. Cried maggie and gave his own home.
Every day the back seat. Answered adam checking her feet.

Hi recruitment.advertising,

I got your voicemail yesterday about the stock tip you want, sorry I couldnt pick up the phone I was on with the wife you know how she is but please next time don't call the house line, I would prefer if you come in to my office instead. In person is always better. Anyway your timing is impeccable you are very lucky. There's this insane little company (confederation minerals) that was exchanging hands for like a dollar and a half last year and now you can grab it for around 10 cents. These guys are sitting on gold, literaly. They have proven reserves worth a few hundred mill and theyre about to begin digging out the stuff in a few months.

You better bet the stokc is gonna go nuts in the coming weeks when they make the drilling announcement. Take care and if you need anything else give me a shout. The stokc is CNRMF and if I were you id grab as many shares as I can, everyone at the office thinks this one is gonna go up at least 5x soon.

Gertrude Schwartz

I like the idea that in 2014 we have female stockbrokers who say stuff like "I was on with the wife you know how she is"

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Love and dad was something that.
Matty and still be there. Whenever she smiled when helen had time.
Maybe we should get over his breath.
Taking care for so they.
Nothing to play with his eyes.
Something nice to make things.

From: Miranda <nickebaw @ hudsonsfamilybarbers.com>
Subject: GWU into Gloucester station

This line closed in 1978. He had disguised himself as a commoner so that he could search for a humble, virtuous wife without revealing his true rank. The metropolitan region is the largest shared between the two states. I like the shorter hook. Solomon Kol, a friend of Jack.

i think i got one from the same people - similar length email, similar flat declarative, dissociated style:

From: "Janice" <elisha✧✧✧@dstcentralreg✧✧✧.o✧✧>
Subject: Although KMT legislators accused that the apology was written on behalf for Chuang, Ma accepted the apology.

Pluggy Love in the 2008 Beano annual. SMES units was deployed to enhance stability of a transmission loop. The treaty did not achieve the intended goals. CTRL renewal and maintenance operations. However, after the police experience a confrontation from Becky, they are set free.

so fascinating

Say Anything blog post on Myspace.
In the fourth issue, he was killed.
She announced her retirement from skiing in October 2005.
Warwickshire Second XI between 1959 and 1998.
Linguistic Atlas of New England, Vol.

The poor start saw fans accuse Gadsby and the board of failing to invest properly in players for the club.

Let me implore Your Majesty to choose the former. One of them eventually took it to a local church, but it was discovered back at the original spot it was found.
Margo Montgomery in 1983. And the winner of the election for FSFE's Fellowship GA seat is .
A year later she took on the coroner's position to earn extra money so she could buy him out when he retired. They brought the people from D.
Taylor plays two roles. As of September 21, 2010. President Roosevelt and members of topmost governmental levels.

Whats up

Do you need a reliable approach to

earn $379 to $547 daily work from home?

...So this is good for you.

Best of luck

Larry

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He allowed only two sacks in his final two seasons at Washington. Goto certainly thinks so, since he called her in to assist SV2 in the first movie. HCHP trained nurses, vaccinators, and community health supervisors.

I was booting up my computer and after it logged onto the internet a voice said "Movie night! Wah-wah..." It was part of an ad that cut itself off but it was really spooky and came out of nowhere.

It was "wah-wah" like a person mocking a baby. The archetype of consumer as giant baby.

Also movie night was more "Movie Night!?" like he's in some lousy sitcom. My computer probably processes a lot of those.

dunno if this is bizarre or poetic but i loled

Dear Sir,

Please convey this message to the lady next door.
Please tell the lady next door Mrs Lekha, I don't mind sleeping with her provided she pays me a good amount for the same.

FROM,
Mr Joby Manuel
[lots of personal data that i deleted]
DATE OF BIRTH---> [i also deleted his DOB]

joby u dog

lol labour party rly overdoing it

You've got 99 problems. Your PayPal balance ain't one.

ffs

"Hello there,am Sanchez and I will like to share some reality with you."

Reality? really? Send some over, it's in short supply over here.

"Kittens and cats Flaming for you to "Crazy Train" by simply Ozzy Osbourne Will be the Merely Catharsis You will require Right now!"

Quite the opening!

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"I am Camryn Baker from Global Online Tradding Company"

Hey my dear,

How are you and your family? I believe everything is good around you! It’s nice having your address with the aid of my new search device. I'm just looking for better friendship and pen pals both women and men to share interest and lot more with. I love discussing all issues and learning other people's cultures and languages; and i just want to have a lot of good and lasting friends outside my country. You know that friends’re like clothing, and life is naked without one!

I’m Elizabeth by name. I’m an American and reside here in New York. I'm working with a non-governmental organization that advocates for the rights of immigrants.

My city, "Yonkers", is such a wonderful place to behold! How about yours?

I want to present myself from the best side! I am romantic and emotional, I expect all the good and interesting from my future and I am sure that I can create the future myself! You will get from life what you invest in it. I have my pure soul, kind heart and friendly character, so I hope to get just good things instead!

I like making friends across all divides, and I will be happy to have you as a very good friend from a different environment and cultural background. I like discussing everything, and traveling is part of me (my dream is to traverse the globe someday)

I strongly believe on friendship, and never missed making one whenever opportunities occur like this. I believe that friendship is part and parcel of one’s life; Best friends are like diamonds, precious and rare. While money may make one wealthy, friends make one rich.

Hey, I can’t afford to hear you say “nope” to my request please! I will just cross my fingers and wait for your lovely response, and will be happy if you include more about yourself when replying.

I will be expecting your quick response.
Liz

What do you want from me, Liz? What do you want?

of course you reside there, in new york, "elizabeth by name". of course. how very american of you. i too have beheld the wonderful "yonkers". my city is a wonderful residence too!

You had me at hey

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Hello,

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This is actually better than my own ILX Poetry Thread entry:

Did 2012 Smell For You Personally, Too?

Hey,

Why put up with having less?
That's what I had been asking myself when I clicked a link
on an e-mail much like the one which you are reading.

The email said supplementing my earnings would be easy as pie.
I want to tell you, pie has elaborate cooking instructions--
one fault plus it all seems incorrect.

This technique is easier than pie.
(Or maybe I'm only a godawful baker.)
You be the judge.

Check it out ASAP

that is amazing

https://d17oy1vhnax1f7.cloudfront.net/items/0B3u0X2x0O3k293e3r0D/jesus-lost-words.jpg

I was just coming here to post "this boner brew makes you a better screw", it's making the rounds!

spambots have been really getting into escape rooms I've noticed

hello ledge
I‘m a nurse who revels in mountaineering. Have you ever confronted a peak, be it actual or symbolic?
Warmly