lord custos tribute thread

Message Bookmarked
Bookmark Removed
Not all messages are displayed: show all messages (478 of them)
"Listen buddy, you wanna insult me? Take a number and go to the back of a very long line!"

-- Huckleberry Mann (Horace Mann), Monday, November 10, 2003 3:17 PM (3 years ago)

and what, Friday, 27 April 2007 18:33 (twelve years ago) link

Wake Me Up Before You Gogol

-- Haikunym (Haikunym), Tuesday, November 11, 2003 1:52 AM (3 years ago)

proto-jbr

and what, Friday, 27 April 2007 18:33 (twelve years ago) link

I think Dennis Miller already used up a really good one:
"Obviously you've mistaken me for someone who gives a damn about you and your sad little life."
Unfortunately, it's too long. That would have to be the subtitle.

-- Lord Custos Omicron (Lord Custos Omicron), Tuesday, November 11, 2003 1:55 PM (3 years ago)

and what, Friday, 27 April 2007 18:34 (twelve years ago) link

[Removed Illegal Image]

and what, Friday, 27 April 2007 18:35 (twelve years ago) link

http://www.horsepresence.com/shop/media/PGMugWarning1895.jpg

and what, Friday, 27 April 2007 18:36 (twelve years ago) link

"Do not meddle in the affairs of dragons, because you are crunchy and taste good with ketchup"

-- Lord Custos Omicron (Lord Custos Omicron), Wednesday, November 12, 2003 3:11 PM (3 years ago)

and what, Friday, 27 April 2007 18:36 (twelve years ago) link

somebody find the custos thread where he makes the 'my reality check bounced' joke

and what, Friday, 27 April 2007 18:38 (twelve years ago) link

The Surname Passantino Really Doesn't Lend Itself To Puns Well

-- Dom Passantino (Dom Passantino), Sunday, May 22, 2005 9:48 AM (1 year ago)

haha

and what, Friday, 27 April 2007 18:39 (twelve years ago) link

I still got it.

Dom Passantino, Friday, 27 April 2007 20:24 (twelve years ago) link

Assuming they're not doing it at top volume and/or from an arcane religion whose prayer rituals involve marijuana, animal sacrifice, or impregnation.

-- nabisco, Friday, April 27, 2007 3:16 PM (4 minutes ago)
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

what do you mean I can't sacrifice my virgins at the Pizza Hut!?

-- Shakey Mo Collier, Friday, April 27, 2007 3:17 PM (4 minutes ago)

gff, Friday, 27 April 2007 20:41 (twelve years ago) link

hahaha 4 a second i tht this was the actual lolz thread & was gonna be like uh gff is losin it

and what, Friday, 27 April 2007 20:44 (twelve years ago) link

*bows* It is the long game that is worth playing in these, our strange times. *checks* Hmm, yes. But I thank you for your welcome. Please ensure your minstrels are imbibing the correct amount of cordials necessary.

-- Ned Raggett (Ned), Wednesday, November 5, 2003 10:53 AM (3 years ago)

and what, Friday, 27 April 2007 20:45 (twelve years ago) link

i think ned mixed up rhydin chat with ilx there

félix pié, Friday, 27 April 2007 20:47 (twelve years ago) link

This thread feels very 2005.

David R., Friday, 27 April 2007 20:52 (twelve years ago) link

y'all are confusing custos-specific lolz with general ilx gaywaddery

strongohulkington, Friday, 27 April 2007 20:54 (twelve years ago) link

god, so much shame

Curt1s Stephens, Friday, 27 April 2007 20:55 (twelve years ago) link

this thread should really be in courier.

Seconded.

Nicole, Friday, 27 April 2007 20:55 (twelve years ago) link

like this?

David R., Friday, 27 April 2007 20:57 (twelve years ago) link

Nice - even got the fucked-up line spacing right.

David R., Friday, 27 April 2007 20:58 (twelve years ago) link

The <code> tag shd be the <custos> tag.

David R., Friday, 27 April 2007 21:00 (twelve years ago) link

^^ 8080

Curt1s Stephens, Friday, 27 April 2007 21:07 (twelve years ago) link

*bows* It is the long game that is worth playing in these, our strange times. *checks* Hmm, yes. But I thank you for your welcome. Please ensure your minstrels are imbibing the correct amount of cordials necessary.

-- Ned Raggett (Ned), Wednesday, November 5, 2003 10:53 AM (3 years ago)

-- and what, Friday, April 27, 2007 4:45 PM (1 hour ago)

what the hell is ned talking about??

s1ocki, Friday, 27 April 2007 22:03 (twelve years ago) link

context:

Oh good lord, We had better be nice to King Raggett of Orange (County) as he's directly behind Us in the succession, and therefore most likely to want Us to come to some bad ends...

How lovely to see you, King Raggett! Would you care for some entertainment? Minstrels? I hear the Earl of Devon has Minstrels Boom and Pierce performing... Have some wine!

Her Royal Highness Queen Kate (kate)

félix pié, Friday, 27 April 2007 22:08 (twelve years ago) link

barf emoticon

dmr, Friday, 27 April 2007 22:13 (twelve years ago) link

i still have no idea what's going on there

s1ocki, Friday, 27 April 2007 22:22 (twelve years ago) link

i like teps blog

, Friday, 27 April 2007 22:22 (twelve years ago) link

link

JW, Friday, 27 April 2007 22:44 (twelve years ago) link

i was so tempted to ask kate on a thread this morning why she uses ILX as a substitute for a therapist but i held back. what a dumb woman she is.

ian, Friday, 27 April 2007 22:53 (twelve years ago) link

UK Cathy

deej, Friday, 27 April 2007 22:57 (twelve years ago) link

THANK YOU sleep, I was trying to find that thread last week!!

Curt1s Stephens, Friday, 27 April 2007 23:35 (twelve years ago) link

i was so tempted to ask kate on a thread this morning why she uses ILX as a substitute for a therapist but i held back. what a dumb woman she is.

-- ian, Friday, 27 April 2007 22:53 (Yesterday)


yep been holding back on that one too the last few days.

Ronan, Saturday, 28 April 2007 01:00 (twelve years ago) link

*bows duly*

sleep, Saturday, 28 April 2007 01:01 (twelve years ago) link

Now where's the one with all of Alex in NYC's multiple uses of "pablum" and "feces".

Pleasant Plains, Saturday, 28 April 2007 03:48 (twelve years ago) link

omg the ned thread

strongohulkington, Wednesday, 2 May 2007 00:50 (twelve years ago) link

bitch, y'all don't know me

-- St3ve Go1db3rg, Thursday, 3 May 2007 15:09 (14 minutes ago)

Dom Passantino, Thursday, 3 May 2007 15:24 (twelve years ago) link

"last few days"

JW, Thursday, 3 May 2007 15:30 (twelve years ago) link

I re-read David Sedaris quite a bit because he always makes me snigger. I'm trying to re-read some of the classics I was assigned in high-school (and the first go round at college) and am discovering that I probably didn't read them the first time.

-- aimurchie, Monday, May 10, 2004 8:59 PM (2 years ago)

Ditto on the Sedaris and the CDs of him reading his books are staples in our car. "You can't kill the rooster, motherfucker!" One of his CDs has a terrific performance by Ann Magnuson and his sister Amy works with him on the audio also. It turns out that I am rereading "Elegy for Iris" tonight. I mentioned it on the "what are you reading now" thread. I had forgotten it.

-- Rabin the Cat (Rabin the Cat), Monday, May 10, 2004 9:15 PM (2 years ago)

Ann Magnuson! Are you a fan of Bongwater? I just flipped through "Naked" and "Barrel Fever" and have decided that the "favorite first sentence" thread could be dominated by a post of EVERY FIRST SENTENCE SEDARIS HAS EVER WRITTEN! I like to re-read Santa Land Diaries at least twice between Thanksgiving and Christmas.

-- aimurchie, Monday, May 10, 2004 10:38 PM (2 years ago)

Yes, I'm a fan- yet another reason I love my husband. He introduced to "Decadent Iranian Country Club," for starters. I married a person far hipper than myself!

-- Rabin the Cat (Rabin the Cat), Monday, May 10, 2004 10:50 PM (2 years ago)

and what, Friday, 4 May 2007 19:16 (twelve years ago) link

somebdy break sedaris' typing hands.

artdamages, Friday, 4 May 2007 20:24 (twelve years ago) link

*sarcasm*

and what, Wednesday, 9 May 2007 17:38 (twelve years ago) link

"omg why am i still wearing my earrings?"

-- Allyzay, Wednesday, May 12, 2004 11:33 PM (2 years ago)

^^^ i'm still planning on using this for my book so no one steal it, i know it's hott

the schef (adam schefter ha ha), Wednesday, 9 May 2007 17:57 (twelve years ago) link

TEH CHORUS:
You don't...want to get...
SONNED BY A WITE KID pussy ass bitch
SONNED BY A WITE KID makin me sick
SONNED BY A WITE KID fuck y'all hoes
SONNED BY A WITE KID you fuckin homo

etc. Imagine it sung by DMX or somethin'

-- AaronHz (AaronHz), Thursday, July 22, 2004 2:13 AM (2 years ago)

Curt1s Stephens, Wednesday, 9 May 2007 22:17 (twelve years ago) link

is that an example of reverse-racism rap

dmr, Wednesday, 9 May 2007 22:43 (twelve years ago) link

The Economist
September 18th 2018

Contents

On the cover
Americans still lead the world in hell of shit, but no longer in the arena of technology. Decades of slacking have left the US' working population left out of the biggest advances and even the military looks to be falling behind: Leader, page 15. Busted-ass telecoms, page 35. Motherfuckers be tripping, pages 39-41


8 The world this week

Leaders

13 Euro Pussies
What in the damn hell

14 Fucking Chinks
Shitty leadership surprise

15 US Techno Meltdown
Told you, bitch

17 The New Assholes
Labour fucked you again

Letters

20 On smuggling, the Arab League, fucked-up tariffs, shit

Special Report

31 Education in Africa
Still shitcanned after all these years

...etc.

-- TOMBOT, Tuesday, September 21, 2004 11:14 PM (2 years ago)

and what, Thursday, 17 May 2007 17:58 (twelve years ago) link

hey mike judge made a whole movie about that

TOMBOT, Thursday, 17 May 2007 18:18 (twelve years ago) link

give it fifteen years, you'll hear a newstory about a naked, gibbering Dana Carvey being discovered in the fetal position atop of George Bush's grave, gnawing on his fingernails.

DANA: babble, gah gah, munch...
SECURITY GUARD: Mr. Carvey, Mr. Carvey...
(gently pulls DANA's hands away from his mouth)
SECURITY GUARD: You're just chewing bone now. Come on.

-- Gear! (can Jung shill it, Mu?) (Gear!), Wednesday, March 16, 2005

and what, Friday, 18 May 2007 20:42 (twelve years ago) link

Motherfuckers be tripping, pages 39-41

nickalicious, Friday, 18 May 2007 21:10 (twelve years ago) link

On the flipside, I can't help but Imagine a black guy in a Flash Costume whenever I say "Turbonegro"

"My name iz Wally Washington, an' I'm the fastest nigga alive. And this is mah bitch, XS"

-- Lord Custos Epsilon (Lord Custos Epsilon), Sunday, May 4, 2003

strongohulkington, Monday, 21 May 2007 16:07 (twelve years ago) link

oh god

Curt1s Stephens, Monday, 21 May 2007 16:12 (twelve years ago) link

you couldn't even ban custos because he wasn't so much a racist as an imbecile

strongohulkington, Monday, 21 May 2007 16:15 (twelve years ago) link

A+

goole, Thursday, 14 October 2010 19:29 (eight years ago) link

irl lols

truly blunted rhyme fiend (J0rdan S.), Thursday, 14 October 2010 19:30 (eight years ago) link

one month passes...

for the love of all that is holy I can see why he changed his name!

gimme schefter (J0rdan S.), Wednesday, 8 December 2010 20:26 (eight years ago) link

first posts justifies it all

Lou Ferrigno (Hulken) (forksclovetofu), Wednesday, 8 December 2010 20:30 (eight years ago) link

catherine vagina

moonship journey to baja, Wednesday, 8 December 2010 21:59 (eight years ago) link

any thread that has mark g & snoball firing jokes like they're zach galifianakis gets the gasface

gimme schefter (J0rdan S.), Wednesday, 8 December 2010 22:01 (eight years ago) link

this was and what to me a cpl years ago, and it was a gd point, well made:

yall is dilutinatin what lord custos tribute thread was supposed to be about

that post doesnt have any html begin/end tags, made-up dialogue, a white guy talkin rap slang, or the courier font

get back 2 me when u see some of that otherwise keep ur anger at bad joeks to ur damn self

― harry s tfuman (and what), Wednesday, 18 February 2009

Ward Fowler, Wednesday, 8 December 2010 22:35 (eight years ago) link

six months pass...

sorry if this is already here ... from human centipeded thread

First grotesque anal grafted stills for Tom Six's HUMAN CENTIPEDE (Fright Fest 2009 thread)

moonship journey to baja, Wednesday, 8 June 2011 03:24 (eight years ago) link

one month passes...

ultimate custos tribute

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CnUKmk5Lz50&feature=player_embedded#at=158

tupac, bach (J0rdan S.), Thursday, 21 July 2011 01:28 (seven years ago) link

appropriately there's no less than 4 references to explosive diarrhea

tupac, bach (J0rdan S.), Thursday, 21 July 2011 01:30 (seven years ago) link

Btw for a min I thought u were D. WADE!
thekingusr 1 week ago

generous doler out of lollies (forksclovetofu), Thursday, 21 July 2011 04:10 (seven years ago) link

ten months pass...

{David is awestruck. The wind picks up. In the air the huge image of the Space Jockey is forming from the clouds. He appears to be walking from the stars. The image is ghostly at first, but steadily gains color and coherence.}

Space Jockey: Humans ...
Michael Fassbender: Father?
Space Jockey: Humans, you have forgotten me.
Michael Fassbender: No. How could we?
Space Jockey: You have forgotten who you are, and so have forgotten me. Look inside yourself, human. You are more than what you have become. You must take your place in the Circle of Life.

― the late great, Tuesday, June 5, 2012 11:46 AM

should've remembered to do it in courier

the late great, Tuesday, 5 June 2012 18:52 (seven years ago) link

five months pass...

http://trapsntrunks.com/2012/11/27/video-k-yay-king-of-the-custos/

Ned Raggett, Tuesday, 27 November 2012 23:53 (six years ago) link

My Fellow Americans,
I come before you tonight as a candidate for the Vice-Presidency and as a man whose honesty and integrity has been questioned. Now, the usual political thing to do when charges are made against you is to either ignore them or to deny them without giving details. I believe we have had enough of that in the United States, particularly with the present Administration in Washington, D.C. I am sure that you have read the charges, and you have heard it, that I, Senator Nixon, took $18,000 from a group of my supporters. Now, was that wrong? And let me say that it was wrong. I am saying it, incidentally, that it was wrong, just not illegal, because it isn't a question of whether it was legal or illegal, that isn't enough. The question is, Have I licked people's butts? It feels like the answer should be no, but , yes, I have licked people's butts, and in fact, I do lick people's butts.

― what is google (schlump), Monday, December 10, 2012 10:20 PM (Yesterday)

the late great, Tuesday, 11 December 2012 20:21 (six years ago) link

one year passes...
four years pass...

i feel like i took part in a robbery and now i'm snitching to the cops but

omar little, Monday, 4 February 2019 19:33 (five months ago) link

three months pass...

she's -- coldblooded, check it and see
got a fetish for the civility
come on nancy, you can do more than that
she's coldblooded, she's coldblooded

― Guayaquil (eephus!), Sunday, 5 May 2019 16:17 (three hours ago) Permalink

:∵·∴·∵: (crüt), Sunday, 5 May 2019 19:39 (two months ago) link

it was very impressive

Fuck the NRA (ulysses), Monday, 6 May 2019 19:38 (two months ago) link

I still maintain the one of mine Ward posted here was actually funny, humf.

Stoop Crone (Trayce), Tuesday, 7 May 2019 04:31 (two months ago) link


You must be logged in to post. Please either login here, or if you are not registered, you may register here.