Got a question for Christgau?

Ha

http://www.robertchristgau.com/icon/wfp-avoid.gif

So Christgau Consumer Guides are now just viewable only through the $5 a month, 12 months a year paid version of his substack?

That is what it appears to me

from this morning's Xgau Sez email:

The irrepressible Alfred Soto recently posted his favourite 20 instrumentals in rock. Seems like he had a lot of fun doing it. How about yours? — Christian Iszchak, Norfolk, England

Without committing to play till the ninth inning, I did what I could to check out most of Soto’s picks and was surprised at how few of them worked for me. To choose the biggest disappointments because my tastes clearly run more r&b-let’s-call-it than Soto’s, neither Sly’s “Sex Machine” nor JB’s “Time Is Running Out Fast” made me say anything like “How the fuck did I forget that”? The Neil Young, the Bowie, even the Sugar just didn’t reach deep enough. But “Tel-Star,” “Frankenstein,” and not quite as undeniably the Stooges’ “L.A. Blues” certainly qualify, as of course does Funkadelic’s indelible “Maggot Brain,” which Carola and I recall first grokking while we were parking our car in an Akron driveway in 1978 and staying in our seats till it was over, enthralled. Almost as crucial is the Meters’ “Cissy Strut.” I’d never registered Yo La Tengo’s “Spec Bebop” and loved it. I’d replace Eno’s “Becalmed” with his “Sky Saw.” Pink Floyd’s “One of These Days” would probably place. Rush’s “YYZ,” which it’s quite possible I’d never heard in my life, also might. But I think Soto was wrong to leave out all “jazz”—Miles Davis’s 27-minute “Right Off,” which leads Jack Johnson, is extraordinary and indelibly rock-derived, and not just because it builds off bassist Michael Henderson’s “Honky Tonk” riff. Which brings us to the ‘50s, which Soto ignores altogether. As I’ve written more than once, it was the hour I spent as a 14-year-old playing side one of my Bill Doggett 45 “Honky Tonk” on repeat that transformed me into the person who became a rock critic. Side two was the hit, one of the best-selling instrumentals of all time, but I always insist that both sides form one composition, still one of my favorite tracks ever. One of Soto’s commenters mentions that he also omitted Link Wray’s equally influential “Rumble,” where you can hear noise guitar being born. And from the ‘50s I’d add New Orleans sax man Lee Allen’s “Walking with Mr. Lee”—and also, just to be contrary, Count Basie’s 1956 hit version of “April in Paris,” another 45 I bought, which Billboard calculated peaked at number 28 but was bigger in NYC I guess.

omg

Congratulations to Alfred on getting Xgau to listen to Rush!

'Tis a far, far nobler thing, etc.

my tastes clearly run more r&b-let’s-call-it than Soto’s

I...have my doubts.

"Sky Saw" has lyrics, Bob, duh.

Congratulations to Alfred on getting Xgau to listen to Rush!

o_O

I...have my doubts.

― but also fuck you (unperson), Wednesday, July 28, 2021 10:36 AM (seven minutes ago) bookmarkflaglink

My K. Michelle collection was most offended.

Congratulations to Alfred on getting Xgau to listen to Rush!

LOL, that deserves some kind of trophy!

Consumer Guide Reviews:
A Farewell to Kings [Mercury, 1977]
The most obnoxious band currently making a killing on the zonked teen circuit. Not to be confused with Mahogany Rush, who at least spare us the reactionary gentility. More like Angel. Or Kansas. Or a power-trio Uriah Heep, with vocals revved up an octave. Or two. D

Yes, I meant after he had already reviewed them so poorly... seeing as someone suggested he re-listen to Judee Sill, to whom he gave a B and a B+, to which he replied, "I vaguely remember those records, life's too short to bother".

"YYZ" is from their most popular album, released in 1981. He hadn't heard it before, which definitely suggests he actively avoided them after slamming Kings.

He answered one of my questions in that forum and ignored two other, better ones; I know how Rush feels.

haha

"Sky Saw" has lyrics, Bob, duh.

Super weird, because it's literally the first song on an album he gave (and has kept) an A+, too.

my tastes clearly run more r&b-let’s-call-it than Soto’s

I...have my doubts.

― but also fuck you (unperson), Wednesday, July 28, 2021 9:36 AM (forty-nine minutes ago) bookmarkflaglink

that's why they call him terence trent d'ean of rock critics

I love that he actually liked "YYZ" too, 40 years late. If only someone had told him earlier that Rush started bringing in some jazz fusion influences after the album he panned.

"YYZ" is just so much fun, even he apparently can't deny it.

I'd call "Sky Saw" an instrumental with negligible lyrics, like "Tequila" or "Maggot Brain".

Really? It seems like a complete sung verse to me, pretty different from something like "Wipeout".

Well, for example, I remember seeing some kind of lyric/art book he released in the 80s with artwork matched to each of his songs, and the "Sky Saw" page had no lyrics.

Same with "Here Come the Warm Jets".

Still seems like a weak case for it to be a top Eno (or top rock) instrumental. There's a verse of lyrics, sung to a melody, right in the middle of the song, feeling to me like at least a sort of key moment in the song, if not quite a climax.

We need a Soto vs. Xgau debate at Town Hall!

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4gi_IGuKx4U

if xgau wanted to swap out an eno instrumental, there are plenty of another green world examples to choose from that have no singing at all, let alone negligible singing

Calling Sky Saw an instrumental proves the lyrics right: no one knows what they mean, everyone just ignores them

Same dada thing as Talking Heads' "I Zimbra," but no one would call that an instrumental.

It's based on how much time the vocal takes up as well, but everyone can draw the line where they please.

It's eight bars, a middle eight of sorts.

Funny how Christgau had never heard "YYZ" but then very casually adds it to his list. It seems that compiling a best rock instrumental list is kind of a low-stakes affair. I must admit I have a hard time remembering ones that have made an impression. My bar for a good instrumental track would be one that doesn't feel like too much of a drag next to the tracks with vocals. Good all-instrumental rock bands are rare as hens teeth, Dick Dale is one of the few. Including the kind of avant stuff on the jazz borderline (eg John Zorn and downtown music) makes it easier. I guess bands with wordless vocalizing are still out (e.g. Koenjihyakkei, Magma, Ruins, etc).

Needs more 'East-West'.

unrelated, but just wanna say I always hear this thread title to the tune of "Take a Message to Mary"

Or "Take a Letter, Maria".

Would probably work with "Message to Michael" too.

His review of Marc Ribot's new memoir leads into a fascinating glimpse of an erstwhile scruffy bohemian NYC milieu. "Don the Burp" sounds intriguing but not enough to shell out $60 to find out.

Then, just as I was finishing it, Akashic Books sent me Unstrung: straight essays, memoiristic briefs, and other stuff by the irascible, idealistic avant-rock guitar dynamo Marc Ribot. And there on page 113 I was astonished to encounter, in the role of Ribot’s pot dealer, my unforgettable acquaintance Ray Dobbins, whose pseudonymous 1980 story collection I’d just devoured on the Q train to his wake at Roy Nathanson’s place. As I write there seem to be five copies of that one for sale, priced between $59.95 and $596.02 at Amazon and somewhat cheaper elsewhere.

https://robertchristgau.substack.com/p/storytellers?r=khofd&utm_campaign=post&utm_medium=email&utm_source=copy

What did Kurt Cobain and GG Allin have in common? The last thing they read was a short paragraph and a letter grade that would sum up and judge their lives and lifeworks. Written by a certain judge, jury, and executioner: Christgau...A-

— Raymond Pettibon (@RaymondPettibon) April 19, 2022

Wait, what?

more like Raymond Ham Bone

Yesterday was Xgaus 80th bday.

"Reactionary gentility" is otm.

Another thing they had in common was throwing their own shit at the audience, and I will never forget Kurdt for what happened

as far as i know xgau never gave a capsule review to gg allin. he is on the "meltdown" list though.

And not to be cruel, but based on what I know of GG Allin, "lifeworks" seems a little lofty. (It'd be a ridiculous tweet no matter who he was trying to defend.)

Sometimes on one of the Christgau threads people will quote stuff he wrote 50 years ago to show how out of touch he is. This came up in his reader-mail column today, something he once wrote about Betty Davis. He began by acknowledging the problem ("I'm certainly aware of this issue") and finished with this: "And by the way, I make it a principle not to censor myself--or simply avoid criticism--by removing anything I’ve published from my site even if I have regrets about it in retrospect." I think that's admirable; not everyone will.

I don't mind the grades or his not liking Flack or Davis; I mind the terms under which he dismissed Flack for instance. Respectability politics.